Click any line to jump to that moment in the audio.
Stop right there. Thank you very much. Dumbgeons and Dragons. We'll be right back in just a touch.
It's a couple days after the wedding. Kav, you've boarded a ship and made your way back to
Vintersmouth and you're pulling in to the harbor in the evening. It is a relatively calm
night. The sun is still setting. It's a beautiful like pinky purple sky. Vintersmouth
looking very beautiful. There's a few people walking along the harbor and as the boat pulls
into the port and the gangplank comes down onto the harbor, you wave a courteous wave to Gorsh
who... Things have cooled between the two of them? I mean he's just been gone a lot.
Okay, that's fair. You are making your way. Where are you headed now that you're back?
It's not like night time, so you know sleep isn't necessarily first and foremost,
but where are you headed? I mean I'm probably going to head to the Brutal Awakening.
You make your way over there. There's a bit, the crowd kind of fills out a little bit.
The closer you get to it, a little more of that evening post-work vibe. Everybody's
looking to cut loose and as you push open the door, the sound of music pours out into the street
and light fills the darkening town square. You see several people from the town that you
recognize, but primarily your friends, Bonwyn, Bazaar and Alydin, across and they're seated
with Alistair. Bench clocks you as soon as you walk in and it says,
Cav, you're back! Which pulls all of your attention to the door as you see Cav enter.
Cav, first piece you notice is that Bazaar is at this point healing, but still a little black
and blue in the face. Cav, you're back! I'm back! It's so nice. Whoa! Bazaar, what
happened? Yeah, I got lost down a dark alley. Oh sure, yeah, okay. Bag over my head kind of
thing. He got the crap kicked out of him is what happened. You know, I was piecing that
together. Yeah, got the good shits kicked out of me. Cool, who'd you piss off? I don't know,
but it's led to talking about some kind of weeping archive, some library. Oh yeah,
that thing. So, total cool coincidence. My dad's fourth wife was totally talking about
the weeping archive and I didn't understand what she was talking about. Huh, no way. It's
weird how when you hear about something and then all of a sudden you keep hearing about
it everywhere even though you don't ever remember hearing about it before. Yeah,
did she have good, like would she tell you? Okay, I remember a bit of it, so I'll just
run it past you guys and just first thought, best thought, especially you, sleeping dude,
I think you're gonna be probably the most knowledgeable about this. Oh, you're back! It's
good to see you again. My Alastair Greaves, lovely to connect again. Oh, sorry, we don't need to do
that again, right? No, totally good. Good, good, good, good. Just to catch you up because I
didn't realize you were asleep. I thought you were just resting your eyes, but. Oh,
were they closed again? Never mind, you go. I was at my dad's wedding. Well, his fifth,
anyway, doesn't matter. What was the theme? Fifth time's a charm? Is that a theme? Fifth
time's a charm. Yeah, so. Kind of has a ring to it. Like a rusted gold? It was more of a rusted
root. That's what they walk down the aisle to? Yeah. Cool. Anyway, his fourth wife. Damn
me forgetting that song in my head, Tom. Fuck you. Send me on my way.
Dumbgeons and Dragons is a D&D actual play podcast, and I'm your dungeon master Russ More,
he, him. Also with me today is Amy More as Alydin, she, her. Well, that's nothing you
could bring me. Carla Maxted as Bonwyn Everbane, she, her. The Weeping Archive,
presented by Brood Awakening. Tom Laird as Kavlaran Goldweave, he, him. It was like
that really cool thing they do in the stories when, like, they drop that last little bit
of knowledge as they, like, walk out the room and it rocks your world. And Kyle Claset as
Bizard the Wizard, he, him. I got a rabbit in my hat. Dumbgeons and Dragons is a Patreon
supported podcast, and we'd love for you to join us today at patreon.com slash dumb
dragon cast. You'll get a seven day free trial to check things out. And now let's get right
to it. Fuck it. Let's play. Anyway, so yeah, his fourth wife, the lovely lady, Dame Corvilla.
She's an interesting one. Anyway, she may or may not be a witch. That's neither here nor there.
But she said that at one point in my life, my father had signed a document.
And she said, you know, being an older man of a certain. Anyway, he didn't read it,
I guess, is the long short of it. And the words did not stay where he put them.
They were taken, preserved and filed in the Weeping Archive. So, so.
Uh, so, so you, so you have a direct connection to the archive through your lineage?
I mean, I don't really know. Maybe. Yeah. Is that what you're saying?
Well, I mean, that's what sounds like your fourth step. I don't know if step step mom.
Kind of just like one of Cav's ladies. Yeah. Is that what you call all of your father's
uh, previous wives is Cav's ladies. They're a whole team. It's the Goldweave girls.
Oh, oh, oh, that's fun. That's a cool name. That's a cool name.
That'd be a great spinoff podcast of several, several older ladies living together.
Putting it out there, not doing it ourselves. I mean, we will eventually. It's probably fine.
Well, that's very interesting. Not great, but interesting.
Yeah. I mean, not great was my first reaction too. So I'm glad we're on the same page there.
Well, maybe it is good. Maybe it's keeping something safe.
I mean, it didn't sound like it when she was talking about it.
Will it help us find it? Because you can like,
sense it. Is that a thing, Alistair? Oh, will his last name be on it? It's filed.
It may be in it. I don't know if it will be on it. I don't know if, yeah, no. I mean,
from what I know is having there are probably guaranteed many names within the archive
throughout however long the archive has existed. Okay. But yeah, placing a name on the archive,
like kind of sponsorship rights. I don't know. Well, no, I mean,
The Weeping Archive presented by Brood Awakening.
And is there a process for learning about this fucking place? Because it seems like
you could be at a wedding and get your ass kicked. And I got the raw end of the deal.
I guess it depends which way you approach it. And I mean, it sounds like a very lovely
wedding. But also, it was all right. It's the fifth wedding. So I guess in the big
scheme of things like tomato, tomato. No swag, but open bar. Open bar is good.
Well, that's nothing you could bring me. Oh, oh, last thing, too. This is probably
the most important because she said it as she had already turned away from me.
It was like that really cool thing they do in the stories when they drop that last little
bit of knowledge as they walk out the room and it rocks your world. She said that if I
ever read my father's name on ink that won't dry, don't touch the page.
That sounds very straightforward. Yeah, and like ominous as fuck.
Yeah, I was just thinking. Yeah, no, that's.
As if you didn't need any more reasons to file things.
Oh, tell me about it. Touch paperwork.
Where's the open? I need them. What the hell do parents know?
Do you want to try it? I open up one of the books.
Which book do you open? Open up the one that we were
writing stuff in that like we were trying to talk to somebody.
The one that was dropping the truth bombs.
There was the private shames book and then there was the one that was more.
Private shames will never not entertain me.
There was the private shames book, which is the one out in the town square that just
seemed to generate once somebody looked upon it.
The bizarre was writing in that was responding depending on what you put in there.
It did show that amorphous ink characteristic.
Yes, yes it did. It took the ink that you had written
and created the response, be it a sentence or a pictograph.
Yeah, yeah. Hold on.
Hold on, Kav, was this stepmom, was she nice to you or is she like jealous of you?
Oh, no, I did not. Did she offer you an apple?
No, no classic. You said she was a witch.
No classic witch. Well, I mean, it seems like she's a witch.
We had a little convo about it where like I'm pretty sure she's a witch, but
she didn't really say she's a witch, but like I think she said it without saying it, you know?
Okay, but do you think that she would want to hurt you?
Oh, no, I don't think so. She was always pretty cool.
I think just, you know, circumstances would like naturally want to pit us against one another,
but we've never, it's always been tight. We've been good.
Sounds like your dad might be the villain if he's now on his fifth wife.
He's 100% the villain.
Oh, so I mean, you probably had a united friend against the old man, right?
Yeah. I think maybe you
should listen to her then.
Okay, cool.
If it was a word of warning, maybe you should listen to your fourth mom?
Well, no, she's like only, okay, it's really complicated.
She's the fourth wife. I was the offspring from the third wife.
And then the two previous wives are also in my gang, but, you know, we're all cool.
It's a gang.
So you're the gang leader.
You're a ring leader?
Oh, no, absolutely not. It is a partnership through and through.
Okay. A lot happened at this wedding for you.
Oh, yeah. No, it was just real busy time.
You see Alistair begin to flip through some pages that are just all over this table
and he's pulling stuff out of his bag.
I think that reminds me, you see him drift and fall and thud on the table.
And as his head hits the table, you begin to hear the town bells ringing outside.
That's probably a bad sign, right?
I'm really tired of those bells.
Me too.
I guess let's go see.
Everybody in, not just you, but everybody in The Brutal Awakening gets up and heads outside.
Except for Alistair?
Except for Alistair.
Do we put him in the recovery position before we go so he doesn't, like,
I don't know, choke on his vomit or something?
You head out into the street after preparing Alistair in the fetal position
and you hear the bells ringing and you look over.
They're town alarm bells. You've heard them as the monsters were attacking.
You've heard them several times in the past before.
There's one down at the harbour. There's one over near City Hall
and there are a couple more kind of space throughout the city.
And as you look around the corner and you can see the one at the harbour,
as you look, something is off about it.
Like, as it moves from one side to the other, it is ringing out of sync.
And as you look at the street signs and the signs of the shops all around you,
the written words that you see begin to bleed ink,
like they're running from the signs themselves down onto the ground,
being seeped into the ground itself.
You hear screams from closer to City Hall, the more noble side of town,
which has been greatly reduced in terms of its status and stature
since Nina has taken over.
That side has been less referred to as the rich side of town
because they're trying to make it a little more equal.
But you hear screams from that side.
You hear people rushing to and from.
You see town guard and you hear the sound of grinding stone
at a distance across the river.
But you can hear it above the sound of the river rushing by.
Something terrible, right?
Something terrible.
I mean, it's usually always something terrible.
Should we go get armed and then go check it out?
Do y'all notice the bell?
Yeah.
Is there anything else out of sync to y'all?
Do y'all notice any other sounds that are going on in people's footsteps?
I'm going to check around and see if anything else is affecting perception.
Are people talking like in dubbed movies?
Yes.
I did a good visual gag, everyone.
Yeah, it was good.
Nailed it.
Yeah, as you look around, so the bells are very clearly that.
If you want to roll, I mean, perception probably is the best one to pick.
I'm going to roll.
It was bad.
It was a nat 20.
Oh my god.
I'm not even going to roll then.
I feel like we only rolled once last week and it was a 19 for you.
Maybe I should only roll once, so I really need to pick my moments now.
I got a 10.
Damn it.
I got a five.
I don't see shit.
I'm very observant.
Oh, I wasn't even going to because Amy...
Oh, I also got a five, so.
Cav, good to see you again.
Cav and Bazaar, your attention is drawn back.
The Brewed Awakening door like bursts open and as you look over to it,
like Alistair's stumbling out, like he just woke up.
He's looking around and you kind of go over to him,
which is drawing your attention right now to make sure he doesn't fall down into the street.
Bonwyn and Alydin, you're looking around at Bazaar's kind of prompt
and you're watching footsteps run by and they are slightly out of sync.
Not quite as clear as the belt, but they are slightly out of sync.
You see someone call to one of their loved ones across the way
and it is also there's like this reverberating like
tunnel effect that is happening when shouldn't be.
You're not that far from these people.
Are your ears not hearing things at the right time?
Yes.
Yes, things are, I don't know, out of sync, out of time.
Am I getting like fae vibes?
Welcome to the middle.
Hey.
How's it all going?
Oh, you're okay?
Yeah, no, I'm good.
Our dog smells real bad.
It's just hit me real hard.
Yeah, I saw.
I said, welcome.
I thought maybe like the microphone jumped at you.
I guess that's out of the corner of my eye.
I didn't see.
No, it's just that middle microphone's not an issue.
It's that middle stank just coming up.
Thanks for being here.
Yeah, good times.
Yes, thank you for being here and listening to us.
We would love and appreciate you and hope you're having a great, great day.
Super awesome day.
Yeah.
We want to let you know that our Carlin Tynes Day sale is still going on.
Carla is busy celebrating the heck out of this whole month right now.
So she can't be here to do it.
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Exactly.
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You can.
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How perfect for Carlin Tynes Day.
Get your loved one a gift of entertainment.
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We appreciate you.
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What color is Amber's energy?
Amber is the color of your energy.
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You can be like Amber.
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at a discounted rate, obviously.
And what we haven't done in a long time, because I mean, it feels like reaching goals.
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It doesn't never really felt like us.
But what I do wish and hope for for Carla's birthday,
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And we've been like skimming that number for a very long time, which I'm fine with.
I just wanted to let you know that you could be the one to help push us over
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Can we shout that person out if we do end up getting pushed over by that one person?
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Patreon.com slash dumpdragoncast until the end of February, 2026.
We got this great sale going on.
Hopefully you can take advantage of that over there.
And now let's get you back to the episode.
Heck yeah.
What episode?
A great one.
This one.
This.
This one.
Okay.
Love you.
Bye.
Love you.
Bye.
Am I getting like fae vibes?
Yeah.
You don't even need to roll for that.
Like I experienced weird shit in the house.
You experienced weird shit.
And like this is like there are certain connections.
It may not be exactly the same thing, but like.
It's a vibe.
It's the vibe.
Everything that's been happening in town, like this is clearly an escalation of that.
And as you, as Bazaar and Kav collect Alastair and bring him over,
he's looking around like his eyes are wide.
He's watching the signs and like pointing at things and like trying to like
make sense of the sound.
And he says it's, this isn't a bleed through anymore.
Like this, he checks a page in his book and he's like filtering through them.
I think this is, I think this is the archive indexing.
What?
What does that mean?
Well, when the archive is taking record, strange, strange occurrences happen
in the town or area where that's happening.
What else, what else have you heard?
Like the bells are going.
Same with the voices.
The voices and the steps are not quite.
Yes.
Okay.
We have to find.
You know, all the bleeding words also is, is also.
No.
Yeah.
We have to find where it's, where it, where's the, where the point is,
where the point of where it started is.
Oh, there was some screaming, so it's probably near that.
That's probably a good idea to go there.
What happens when something is indexed?
Usually it's whatever is being indexed is, is cataloged.
Sometimes there's a physical detraction from the world.
Something is taken and archived.
Other times, just the words or the sentiments
of the things happening in this town are taken and archived.
So is somebody writing down a story of something
happening right now in Vindersmith and it is being.
Something has, has, has broken through and.
It's like sucking us into the archive.
And it's recording our experiences for who?
For the truth.
Is that a title or a.
For.
The concept of the truth.
For its concept of the truth.
For.
For its knowledge.
The archive it.
For it.
Well, I don't know.
There's no record of somebody controlling the archive.
Like powers greater than anything that I can comprehend
or have come across.
Similar to an objective.
Objective entity.
Yes.
It doesn't really matter what's going on.
They're just an eye viewing.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes, that's it.
But.
But if it's happening now,
it could mean that there's an entrance nearby.
What about where that book showed up?
Oh wait, we're like there.
Yeah, you turn to the left.
Is it that?
It's not there.
Is the book there?
Do you hear that sound of grinding stone rise above the calls
and the bells on the other side of town?
Well, the action's that way.
It certainly is.
Yeah, it certainly is.
Let's arm up, mount up.
Get my steed.
She turns and looks at Bazaar.
It's a joke.
Cav, did you bring Alydin a pony from your dad's wedding?
I mean, we only got one to keep for ourselves.
Is that the swag?
It's a slow ride home.
It's not a fifth wedding swag gift, I'm afraid.
No, all I know is.
We should probably go help those people, huh?
Okay, so you each independently had to get, I guess, weapons?
Or do you go to Bonwyns to get, say arm up?
I was thinking, I was thinking everbanes,
but obviously that's where I would go.
But it is where all the weapons are.
Not all the weapons, but.
All the best weapons.
Many weapons.
But yeah, I guess everybody could have their own stuff
at their own place.
I assume we probably, like at this point in our lives,
remain somewhat armed at all times,
unlike before things started to go fricking nuts.
But this is like, we're heading into it.
So we got to get the, you know.
You need the duffel bags full of guns from the Matrix.
Exactly.
Gotcha.
Yeah.
Okay, so you take a moment.
You get to your things that you don't have.
Cav, you just got off a boat.
So like likely.
You're at a wedding, you're fully armed.
The majority.
Yep, particularly going into the hot spot
that was your father's fifth wedding.
You need shield and hammer.
Absolutely.
To be able to walk out of it.
You didn't know what was going to be asked.
Could have been anything.
As not best man, then best man,
and then not best mannequin.
That's right.
We cut across the river to the fountain outside of City Hall.
Previously a large monument to Mayor Knopps
now turned back into more of a modest fountain.
But what you see before you is no longer a fountain.
Out of the earth, a stone doorway has formed.
And it's fine.
The final keystone pieces are being moved by some unseen entity
or something, some force, placing them into position.
The doorway itself is this deep red oak
with these metal strappings across it.
It has this large globe for a handle.
People have run and fled and there are some guards
putting position around it,
trying to keep people away from it as you come up to it.
And Alistair looks and says,
this, I was down here the other day.
This wasn't here.
Tell me this wasn't here.
This is new.
This is new.
This is new.
Definitely, definitely new.
Is the screaming rust just because the, you know,
cobbles are moving and forming a door or people?
It appears now that you're on this side,
like shock and surprise.
More than somebody's being attacked.
Okay. Sure.
Well, that's something.
Bizarre, as you step closer to this,
something in your pocket begins to move.
Someone play hide the vibrator in somebody else's pants,
turn it on remotely at security check out.
And it's in an inside pocket and you reach in
and you remember immediately what it is.
Worse.
It's not better.
It's a vibrator.
I knew it.
You grab hold of the spool of thread that you found
floating in your store after you returned from the Fae.
It is the thread on the spool appears to be spinning
quite rapidly around this wooden spool
and it is developing this cold feeling to it,
which intensifies the closer you get to this door.
Okay.
So it's a spool of thread that's starting to like
unwind and starting to feel a little cold?
Not even unwinding, just like the thread itself
remains on the spool, but is like spinning around
while you hold the wooden portion of it.
Okay.
This hasn't happened before.
Nothing has really happened.
Aside from floating in front of you,
I don't know how much time you spent identifying
or doing anything with it.
We can retcon some of that if you'd like,
but it hasn't done anything since then.
Yeah.
Um, so I assume I've let it go
and it still floats in the air.
So with it spinning and it being that close,
I pull it out and I hold it there
and as it gets cold, I release it just out of instinct
and see what happens.
It floats in front of you as kind of the chaos dies down.
Guards get a little bit of the crowd under control
and move people away.
Um, Alydin, you're first to pick up on it,
but everybody else hears it.
The spool begins to hum a bit of a song.
What does it sound like, Russ?
Uh, it is, uh, no.
No.
No.
Um, you-
Juge.
You hear it though, and it instantly transports you, Alydin,
back to the Banjo Man's house.
Is this because I asked you to hum it?
Doesn't transport you,
but like that's where it places you, mentally.
Oh, mentally, okay.
Yeah, like you aren't gone, but like transports you-
I'm like, you dick, it was a joke.
Mind.
You don't hum to anything.
We have a brief cut scene where you're like
picturing yourself back in the house,
like this song-
I'm having a flashback.
Yeah.
Wasn't the primary song that kind of lingered throughout,
but it was something that wove itself through your time there.
And everybody else hears this song,
you can't place it necessarily,
you didn't spend as much time in that space as Alydin did.
That, that's, it's not the song that the box made, right?
No, no, it's not that song.
There's so many songs.
I know.
Same artist, different track.
Oh, okay, yeah, yeah.
I've heard, I've heard this before.
Where?
Um, at the, at my, at the, the banjo man's house.
Oh, I'm sorry.
That must be upsetting to hear.
Yeah.
I grab it, try to get the humming to stop.
Gets louder.
It amplifies in your hand like a Kleenex box.
No, you grab it, you may, like,
as you grab it and like pull it close to you,
it slows it's spinning,
it still has that cold feeling to it
and just kind of, you hear it faintly,
but it definitely dissipates as you,
as you place it back into your pocket.
But you can still feel it moving,
like trying to pull itself towards the door.
When it was floating, was it,
was it moving towards the door or was it staying?
It was staying, yeah, staying stationary.
So with it, like, I'll, like,
I have it in the pocket in my, in my jacket
and I'm going to put my hand over it and hold it
as if I'm holding it over the coat
and then I'm going to walk towards the door
and see if it still reacts or still gives off,
to see what the reaction is.
This thing needs to be in front of it.
Yeah, the closer you get,
the colder it feels through, through your jacket.
You can feel the threads, like, winding
and where, like, friction should dictate,
like, this should be starting a fire in your jacket.
Like, everything is, like, even frosty around this piece
and as you get within a few feet, it stops.
Okay.
The orb on the door, while I'm holding it,
I'm going to take a quick look at the orb on the door
and see if there's anything that would lead me
to believe I could use this thread on this orb.
Make an investigation roll.
Okey dokey.
Hell yeah, another five.
What do you do to investigate the door?
You know, I'm standing, like, probably a couple feet from it.
I'd probably give it a once-over with my eyes
and then pull out my sword
and see if it spins or has any kind of motion to it.
And I think that's about the extent
of what I'd try to accomplish with it to see,
is there more than one side to this orb
or is it just the face that I'm seeing?
Is it tidally locked?
Okay, yeah, I see what you're saying.
So yeah, you pull out your sword,
you even take a half step closer to it
and as you're examining it,
everybody else is kind of crowding in around you
so they too can see.
But as you take that half step
and make even the slightest movement towards it,
you see the door turn and, like, unlatch
and it slowly creaks open
and you see a darkness pour out of it.
Until after just a brief moment,
from somewhere within this recess,
there's the faint light of a torch
that starts to bleed through this darkness.
Dumbgeons and Dragons Season 4 Episode 49
Starring Amy More as Alydin,
Karla Maxted as Boba Fett,
Starring Amy More as Alydin,
Karla Maxted as Bonwyn Everbane,
Tom Laird as Kavlaran Goldweave,
Kyle Klasset as Bizard the Wizard,
and Russ More as your Dungeon Master.
Dialogue Editing and Sound Design of today's episode
is by Russ More.
Our Community Manager is Jessica Babiuk.
Music is from Epidemic Sound
and Sound Effects are from
Epidemic Sound Boom Library and Sound Ideas.
Our Amazing Cover Art is by Matt Garbutt.
A huge thank you to our supporting producers,
Gabriel Lynch, Jessica Babiuk,
Angaron Kierzen, Perry Matey,
Cat Waterflame, Jacob Madden,
Old School Gamer D, Craig Zeiss,
L.A. Branton, Chibs1012,
and Kudzu828.
Dumbgeons and Dragons is a Patreon-supported podcast,
and all of our amazing community help make sure
that we have adventures for you every single week.
Come join us today, patreon.com slash dumbdragoncast.
We hope to see you over there,
and you have yourself right now
a great week.
Yes, and we'll talk to you very, very soon.
Edna has taken... Edna? No.
Nina.
Nina.
Fuck.
Nina Madonna.
Edna's the hedgehog.
And from Incredibles.
And from Incredibles, yeah.
Character inspiration.
Dumbgeons and Dragons is a Dumb Dragons production.