Ad breaks are marked in the transcript below. The audio player uses the ad-supported feed.
previously on Dumbgeons and Dragons.
Know that Voronox can be trusted, and I will save you this day, even if it costs me my life.
Oh, no, that's not necessary. Holy unnecessary, sir.
No, it's my holy charge.
It is so nice.
Thea, you first to hear it, you quickly turn and you look and you see the silhouette
of what looks like a very large dragon.
Dragon!
Excuse me, why are you doing this?
You are in my territory. Leave now or perish.
Okay.
Okay. What?
You see like this, this welling of, of, of energy in its chest at the what?
She's definitely going to do.
Five.
Oh, fuck with the count.
God damn it, Roz.
I don't know who you think you are, but that, that is mine.
No, you can't, you have to believe me, we're very good friends.
This scene plays out before you as you are standing in the middle of this building that
you're familiar with. Since memory comes back, you begin to be able to smell the wood in the
walls and the floor and the hearth burning, a stew cooking on the stove bubbling away,
and the sound of the whittling and the, the, the wooden carvings falling to the ground.
Hmm.
Peace.
I remember peace.
Welcome to Dumbgeons and Dragons, I'm your Dungeon Master Russ More.
He, him, also with me today is Tom Laird.
Yeah, that's me, he, him, and I am playing Flint, who also goes by he, him.
And Carla Maxted.
She, her, I am playing Lipsyn, Lipsinki Pip Diggins.
Hard one.
Also goes by she, her.
And Amy More.
Yeah.
And Carla Clasett.
I didn't even get a count to five that time.
And my wife, Amy More.
Oh, fuck you, okay, Carla Clasett.
Still not speaking to you.
Amy was left out of the intro all together.
How dare she swallow spit, forget who she was playing.
Sorry, Amy More.
Yeah, whatever, she, her.
Playing P.S., almost all of P.S., she, her, and Night Hunter, she, them.
And Kyle Clasett.
Hey, he, him, and I will be playing Vorunax, also he, him.
Thank you for joining us today, everybody.
You're welcome, sir.
Thank you for running a game for us.
Anytime, anytime, as long as it's a Tuesday.
Preferably Tuesdays at our regular scheduled time.
That's right.
Is there anything else you can do on a Tuesday?
I wouldn't know, I haven't had a free Tuesday in years.
What do other people do on Tuesdays?
I don't know, sign up for a Patreon
so that they can have an episode dedicated to them.
Today's Patreon?
Patreon?
Patreon patron.
Yeah.
I'm so sorry, Russ, I didn't mean to.
Oh, no, it happens.
No, it's beautiful.
We loved it.
So smooth.
God, we're going to have to start paying you just the dividends here, Kyle.
God damn.
Like, today's patron, ALex McCoon.
Thanks, ALex.
Thanks, ALex.
Thank you, ALex.
Where you hear Kyle in our Dumbgeons and Downtime over on Patreon,
you can do that there too,
because Kyle hangs out everywhere with us.
Our camera's doing weird color changes.
It's freaking me out.
Yeah, you guys are very red.
It's very warm.
Hot.
But when you join us over there at Patreon.com slash DumbDragonCast,
that's what you get.
More Kyle.
We've made him join everything we do.
It was, we started slowly, but we're quite insidious.
Russ sends me words and phrases to record,
and then he inserts them so quietly.
So you got to just listen.
Listen to everything multiple times.
See where you can hear me.
He is actually an adventures of.
Go search.
I've re-edited him back throughout the entire run of the show.
Perfect.
He just kind of pops in.
George Lucas'd me.
That's right.
Yep.
Yeah.
Okay, let's play.
Vorunax, you're standing in the middle of your home in Blackpool,
and you're watching Malice and Acer and yourself.
They're guiding your hands as they're teaching you how to craft the wooden horse
that you hold now in your hand that has brought you into this memory.
And you've been brought there by the spell that you cast upon it
to unlock all of your most precious memories.
Vorunax is just standing there watching it, remembering, like, that was peace.
That was peace for him.
And whether he still exists in, like, the material plane,
like, you know, if Lipsinki, Thea Knight, Hunter, and Flint can still see Vorunax,
he's just standing there, like, wide-eyed, crying.
I think it probably makes sense that they see you.
So you, in your mindscape, have gone somewhere else,
because that's probably how Vorunax would have relived these memories,
is in the solace of your chambers, not having to go anywhere,
not having to be interrupted by anybody, just reliving these moments.
So before you, everybody else, is Vorunax goes almost glassy-eyed
and is living something that you cannot see and begins weeping before you.
How does this memory end, Kyle?
This memory ends with Vorunax proudly showing his first carving,
and Malice just looks over at him and he says,
well, we've all got to start somewhere, don't we?
And he kind of just takes it and he gives a subtle nod and a sly grin,
and they just have a little bit of laugh at the expense of this crudely carved thing,
but it is the memory that really matters about it,
regardless of the quality of the carving.
It's something that started him on a specific path.
This memory begins to fade for you, and it begins to fade into a new memory, a new scene.
And it is a scene of, it's a bit of a montage, because I mean,
I assume that Vorunax has a little flair for the dramatic,
and so it's a montage of the thanks that townspeople have given him,
showing gratitude to Vorunax in different ways in one scene that it is melted into.
It is an old lady at a doorstep handing you a basket of freshly baked bread,
melting into a scene of children leaving bundles of wild flowers that they've picked on the side
of the roads at your doorstep, melting into you shaking hands with the town mayor
after getting rid of a particularly nasty, bothersome creature
that's been stopping trade routes between that town and the next.
And all these memories are flooding one after another in fairly quick succession
where you're feeling the overwhelming feeling of gratitude and respect and belonging
that you felt in this town.
I like that. I like that a lot.
Scene shifts, and we're back in Blackpool after a long journey that Vorunax has taken,
doing good in the world, and there's smoke rising from beyond the hills as he approaches,
rushes forward as fast as he can to try to get back to Blackpool,
to stop whatever is happening, but arrives there and sees the scene of devastation
that we as the storytellers have told already several times,
but it's where the entire town of Blackpool has been erased, its inhabitants destroyed.
And that's where we see Vorunax now, on his knees, weeping with malice and acer in his arms.
I think going down that rabbit hole, as far as things, this memory comes across as a mixture.
It means a lot because of who he lost.
The scene of, you know, coming across the scene of malice and an acer being dead in the home
that they shared for so long before Vorunax got his own.
Just the scene of devastation and destruction and realizing, you know,
like he had been betrayed despite all the good he had done.
It's that moment of turning and then spinning maybe like a week or so,
just kind of in a funk, in a daze, walking around, like not even staying in Blackpool,
like he'd probably left right afterwards.
So another montage of him just walking through different,
you know, different parts of the countryside and different cities,
ignoring people the entire way.
Not like somebody on the side of the road pays them no mind, doesn't answer.
And then he reaches a point where he comes across another pAlydin,
a young pAlydin getting his start.
And this is the first time Orcus whispers to him.
Zed, he follows the one that killed your family.
That was the first whisper.
And that was the first time that Vorunax took pleasure in his rage
by murdering that nameless pAlydin and leaving him on the side of the road.
A scene of Vorunax wiping his blade on the grass,
sheathing his weapon, carrying on with this,
what he didn't see at the time but sees now through this altered version of this memory.
Of this figure floating, this aura and figure floating behind him
and beginning to follow him through this and all future memories that come.
The next scene I don't particularly have an idea for.
It's like something that's happened, obviously,
and we have loosely explained.
But when he goes back to Blackpool and sets that up, how does that sit in a
good memory?
When he goes back to Blackpool after killing that pAlydin and starts to
follow Orcus more and take over that town and convert people,
he feels good about that, right?
He feels like he is helping them and also he feels some control,
which obviously feels good when your whole everyone you love has been destroyed.
So he has family dinners with all of the deceased in Blackpool.
It's kind of a good memory.
The memory fades into a scene of the battle at the Well of the Dragons and we see forces on all sides
fighting and dying and the image of these swirling souls is coming into view.
And all of these souls are churning about trying to find their place and being driven up into this
storm that is brewing above the Well of the Dragons.
They're being sucked into what is this hidden or obscured portal in the sky and we see
and we see
off in the distance we see Varnax and Varnax is standing behind himself and a group of his
closest regime and watching this and enacting this and the casters that he has around him
propelling this energy forward.
We see these souls being sucked up into this portal and appearing and churning within the
abyss, the roiling bubbling ichor of the abyss right in Orcus's lair.
Orcus is standing over this this funnel that is feeding directly into him and he is absorbing
this energy that's coming through.
He's eating it up and we see him gaining power this hideous grotesque
bulbous body with this goat skull head.
He is cackling with the most venomous laughter as he is gaining this initial
push this initial power that allowed him to begin taking over the gods.
Which seems like an apt transition to one of these jails, one of these holding facilities
where we found Bahamut and several of the other gods and know that they were and are
being held.
The scene is dark, sound of those chains echoing in the air,
dark sound of those chains echoes out through the space.
And Pelor is visible, a god of light who appears to be becoming extinguished.
Yeah, so, um, Orcus let Varnax kind of go to town on Pelor as they've got them all
chained and collared up and obviously being a god and Varnax not being a god, he wasn't able
to to do much other than inflict some minor pain on Pelor even after countless hours of
attempting to torture him and that's when Orcus presented the wand into Varnax's hands
and said this is what will help you in your quest.
And there's this kind of like, you know, cut scene of like him, him wielding the wand close
to his face and you see like this eerie glow on his face and then like the camera stays there
but the wand moves out of scene and then you see like a flash of this eerie light on the other
way and then Varnax just like smiles, this like evil smile. Do you have god blood on his face?
Yes. I mean, yeah.
And there's the first day when he works with Lipsynche, she's just an intern.
But there's something about her. Immediate connection. Kind of a real evil streak,
truth be told. This kid's got moxie. She really, yeah, can be creative in her cruelty
and then just montages of them going on great adventures that they love. They
create a giant wave and drown a whole town to turn them into undead or they go
and cause the creeping death and destruction around a small town as like everything just dies
around it closes in and as they try to escape they die and nothing can be done. And man,
Lipsynche and Varnax just, it's so funny like when that one guy tries to run out,
what's he thinking even? We're taking bets and whatnot.
100%. And of course we're in the airship and we're like working on prototypes of our
undead drop zones. You have to account for the wind.
Yeah, yeah. And I mean, it is gross and cruel, but the undead are like this never-ending
resource of cannon fodder that we can just manipulate in all kinds of terrible ways
and feed off each other. Like, oh yeah, well how about this? Oh yeah, well how about this?
And yeah, become great friends with their shared cruelty, but I think also
like come to actually care about each other and yeah, are actually friends even if it's
all based on, you know, taking over the world with Undead for Orcus.
And not that either of them would admit it.
Yeah.
They're colleagues.
Totally.
I think all those memories running together eventually coalesce into one moment where it's
just Vorunax and Lipsynche and they look tired. They've been at work for a while
getting things done and they look just fatigued and Vorunax takes a moment,
sits back, looks at Lipsynche, just says,
Lipsynche, I have to admit
that if there were one person I would want to see left alive, it'd be you.
Oh, you. I feel the exact same way.
Feels like a shame that we're eventually gonna have to go that way too, doesn't it?
Well, I guess I hadn't really thought about it. At some point we will run out of other people.
Yeah.
Huh.
Well, the work must be done, right?
And there's a whole world to or at least, you know, a fifth of a world left.
Right. I mean, this is what we've been taught.
Must be done, right?
Absolutely.
Well, if it must be done again, I'm glad I get to do it with you.
Thank God I don't have to do it with that fucking Shangri-La guy. That guy's a fucking brick.
Yeah, he was one of the worst and we have seen the worst.
You know what? I think we're the worst.
We are the worst.
Clean cups.
Whatever. You guys are drinking out of the same malt glass.
Oh, yeah. Passing the straws.
Two straws.
It's Shangri-La's skull.
Yes.
Do you want to hang out with us? It's gonna be a great time on the first Tuesday of the month
of the month with Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast.
We have a hang out every Tuesday.
Not every Tuesday.
Just the first Tuesday of the month.
Okay, I'd like you all to just in your in your mind's eye,
picture Russ, our wonderful, very, very handsome DM Russ,
arms tightly clenched around himself, eyes closed.
Creating this song for you. Messing up halfway through with a calendar thing,
which I'm sure is just killing him right now. But powering on.
It was beautiful.
It was really great.
Thank you.
It was really beautiful.
But everything he said was true, except for the every Tuesday thing.
I corrected myself. So then everything else became true.
Right. There was like a fact check within the-
Real time fact checking.
Yeah, exactly.
We're just sitting over going, nope.
Nope. But yes, we do have a gook hang.
Fun fact, the original was dubbed gook hang because it was previously on Google Hangouts.
It's true.
And even though we don't use it anymore,
the name just kind of stuck and now it is a thing.
So we do that on the first Tuesday every month.
See, it's not so easy.
It seems like every month you run out a little bit there.
It's the cry of all the patrons going, it should be every Tuesday.
But then we could never record the podcast.
That's true.
That would not work.
That's true.
That would be a problem.
But it's real fun. We hang out and talk about the show and mostly just actually
bullshit about just what we've been up to, what shows we're watching, and yeah, it's fun.
It's got a live chat within it that we watch and talk to you and ask you questions
and find out more about what's going on in your world.
But also a Q&A that Tom is very much in charge of.
Absolutely.
I look forward to ignoring more of Jess's messages.
That's right.
If you're anyone who is not Jess, like ask in that Q&A.
Yeah, use that Q&A.
That's for you.
And we will answer.
Oh, Jess, we love you.
Okay. But we would love to have you.
Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast where we're recording this in the past.
So I don't know if we've made it to our goal yet, but if we haven't,
we hope that you come join us and help us do that.
100 patrons.
It's a community goal.
A hundred people, a lot of people in one space.
So many people.
So many people.
And we would love for you to be there.
Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast.
Okay, bye.
Bye.
Bye Tuesday.
To Kyle, for Vorunax, do you feel like that would be one of the last
memories that he probably would have stored in there?
I think that's the last memory.
Yeah, that that he has in there.
I don't think he has the memory of what he did on the beach
because it just wasn't that time.
And so, yeah, I guess Vorunax would come out of that glassy eyed look
just like so many liquids coming out of the face
in like an embarrassing way where he just like kind of like
puts up puts up his cloak and, you know, he's a little embarrassed.
He's just like, I,
you lip-synchy, you appear to mean a lot to me
in ways that I didn't think would be possible
going forward from where I've been.
Well, it's true, we're very good friends,
and we were very, very good being very, very bad.
But now, you made this incredible sacrifice
and Orcus was rising, you died, and we're here to,
we want your help.
Vorunax walks over and takes the carving that future Vorunax gave you
and puts it back in your hand and takes your hand
and clasps it over it and says,
this is yours, hold on to it.
And he holds on to, he puts his hand back on it
and also kind of like taps lip-synchy on the forehead
between the eyes and says,
if you ever want to relive some of your memories with him,
all you have to do is just call upon it, should be able to know.
But if you're half as good as those memories made it seem to be, then
perhaps I could get started on a new friendship early.
That is if, well, and I look over at like everyone else, just like,
I'm guessing you'll kind of forgive the things that I've done,
but I guess I haven't done yet.
Well, I mean, I'm not going to lie,
the stuff you've done already isn't great.
Yeah, and I'd say it's in the past, but.
But it's in the now, but also it is in the past.
But you know what?
We came to do a job, and if you can help us do that job,
then you got your whole future in front of you, kid.
What if I could just step out of the picture, not die.
I mean, Orcas would find me anywhere.
No, this is pointless.
And if I were to just die,
then you'd wind up fighting me one way or the other.
Oh, yeah, we would prefer you not die.
You are kind of pivotal to this whole plan we've got.
Yeah, I didn't.
We, I'm not sure if we made this clear.
We traveled in time to get back here so that you could help us.
Okay.
You have what we need.
Only you.
You are, you know, cornerstone, linchpin.
No, no.
That all the other important bits.
You are saviors.
You are the heroes that people talk about.
But you fall into that like you fall into bad guy stuff.
I'm just saying.
Okay.
Well, I'm just saying.
But the gods, they, what they did,
you still believe in them enough to stop what they're doing?
Well, they didn't.
They, yeah, it was more Orcas did that to your memories.
He puts on a great show.
That's what I saw.
Of course.
We know.
We know that's what you saw.
We got to see you see it.
Twice.
And you see like a green dragonborn blushing, which a little odd,
but you know, it happens.
Chuck truce.
Yes.
Do not be embarrassed.
I mean, I already let you carry me.
And I've seen you cry.
In my culture, we are practically married.
Don't tell my wife.
Good to know.
I'll be sure to keep it on the DL.
Um, but, uh, I, I just, I just don't know.
This is a stock.
It's just all very soon, very sudden.
I don't, I don't know what it means.
It's like a crisis of faith and met with an existential crisis,
met with an ego death.
If you said my old future self sacrificed themselves for it,
then there was something, something that at the end,
it didn't seem right in my memories.
It was a memory where we were talking.
And I asked you, like, do, do, do we have to do this or
something along the lines of being like,
eventually it's going to have to be us.
And I didn't sound confident.
Yeah.
I mean, that, that crisis of faith and,
and existential crisis and ego death.
I mean, my goodness, I've, I've seen you do this two times today.
Now once, once super evil, you super awesome, badass evil,
you on the deck of an airship and you changed your mind
and you wanted to help them.
And now here it's, it's happening again and,
and just know that you were way further along in serving orcas then,
and you still changed your mind.
Oh, and convinced Lipsinki to change hers because she was.
I was not.
No, I was still worried.
She's going to turn on us.
I don't trust you.
I, I trust you Lipsinki.
Feels odd.
It feels like you've, you've been in the, you know,
you've been in the organization a little bit longer than I have technically.
And I feel like you're kind of my superior at this point.
And well, if you're turning coat for lack of a better phrase, then fuck it.
I guess it's just going to lead me to death one way or the other.
Then what kind of existence is that?
Well, I guess that means now you're my intern.
I think that's only fair.
Montage.
He's at a typewriter at a desk.
He's getting Lipsinki coffee.
I, I take a drink and I throw it.
He's not hot enough.
He's up on the, the intern Memorial wall.
Oh no.
Things have gone too far.
Things have gone too far.
Well, I guess that means, uh, we have lots of work to do, uh, uh, infiltrating orcas
is a system and taking him down from the inside now before he can recap it
and destroy the world 10 years from now.
Yeah.
So it only took that long.
Well, you and I were a very, we were a very efficient team.
Uh, I know you can't really say because you don't know how powerful he gets in the future,
but on a scale of like kind of annoying to totally taken over the world,
where would you put orcas right now?
Like, what are we?
I, I think if orcas wants someone dead, they will find a way to make that someone dead.
Um, and then undead.
But naturally, you understand unnaturally, you know what I mean?
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's very confusing.
Now a few deities have already been removed and that power course goes to orcas,
even if the death comes at a hand of one of the followers.
So I know a payload is in there.
A few others.
It's a, it would be a hard, hard pressed fight to you.
Well, you just got here.
I don't imagine you have any other allies.
Oh God, I'm your only ally right now.
Yes.
Yeah.
Correct.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Do you realize how bat shit crazy that sounds?
Yeah.
I mean, to be fair, our only ally at this time in this place,
but there's other, it's so much more complicated than even we've explained to you.
Oh my gosh, you guys, can we find us?
Oh, yeah, you, we haven't met yet here.
But I mean, you two were bound to meet sooner rather than later.
How fucked up am I fucking things up right now?
There's a crack of energy above you, above the canopy of the forest.
And Bahama comes down and goes, no, no, no.
No, there's a crack of energy above you.
And you hear just this faint distant sound.
Oh no.
Is this a countdown from five?
It's fucking Grancis.
I probably could have stopped him from falling, but I just didn't want to.
Hey, hey, hey, everybody.
I got Donnie.
Oh my God.
Hey, you forgot me in the fucking future.
Jesus Christ.
Listen, lots been going on.
Are you okay, buddy?
You put me in a bag and said, don't come out.
And I was supposed to grab the bag.
A lot happened.
There was a giant portal.
And then old man Dingus over here walks out on the beach like, anybody out here?
I was so fucked out and said, is anybody out here?
And then I said, well, I guess it's just you and me.
And then you know what he did?
He picked up the bag and we walked into a portal.
Just a random fucking portal.
Okay.
Did it close behind you?
Do you know if it closed behind you?
I don't know.
Look up.
That wasn't there before.
There's no portal.
I guess it closed.
Oh.
Like the anus of one of those flappy flying things that flies at you backwards
and tries to eat you from the inside out, upside down, and sideways.
There's a lot of things that happened after you fucking left.
Honey, I'm sorry.
You want a cracker?
Yeah.
Yeah, I do want a cracker.
Get over here.
Do you have crackers?
We're in the time before the crackers disappeared.
I put a pocket full of crackers, but I forgot my pocket dragon.
She cuddles him with him reluctantly, eating crackers.
Hey, everybody.
What is happening here?
I'm Grancis.
Hi.
Nice to meet you.
Grancis.
We don't need to introduce,
because that seems like a little bit overkill at this point.
There.
So Grancis and I, before I became your intern,
I was just like-
We were homies.
Working in the abyss.
I wouldn't say we were homies, but-
Side pieces.
We were colleagues.
We did dig together.
We fucked is what I'm trying to say.
We fucked.
Fine.
Everybody knows it.
We got down and dirty in the underworld.
No.
No, I refuse.
No.
Kill me all you want.
I am not Grancis' lover.
In fact, you said lover sounds a lot worse than side pieces.
Anyways, what I was trying to say is I don't know,
but I'm here because they thought I was powerful.
Well, I mean, you were at one time.
Yeah.
And you got out of here.
I mean, you didn't take an internship.
You-
Oh, out of the abyss?
Yeah.
I heard that he was rescued.
I was rescued by a tiny goblin named Flamikinskins.
You can hear those adventures at Patreon.com.
Wow.
An in-character.
Mid-episode plug.
Anyways, I was powerful and I lost my book.
You need a book to be powerful?
Yeah, I'm a wizard.
When did you lose book?
Before I died the first time.
I died, crashed.
I crashed, landed a ship, saved everybody's life.
Right, Thea?
Right, Flint?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yep.
I trust that's correct.
That power went down.
And he makes one hell of a pancake.
You did tell me that story like a hundred million times,
so I believe it.
Thea, make a perception check.
Why?
Because I can't actually remember when that happened.
Well, no, you can of course remember when that happened.
No, Amy can't.
26.
When he says...
Right, Thea?
Right, Flint?
You see him stop and hang on Flint for a moment.
Then kind of shake it off.
Yeah, no, we were flying an airship and it crashed
and then we were attacked by Gull to the Dragon.
That seems like something that was probably happening at the time.
And then I used the electric power and summoned it
and it vaporized my body, but saved you.
I mean, it was pretty cool.
It was pretty cool.
It was pretty cool.
That meal that he made though before we
experienced all that was even better though, Flint.
Oh, what was it?
I only remember making us pancakes, but that wasn't that.
Pancakes are fucking delicious.
Okay.
Anyway, glad you're here.
I mean, Vorunax was just freaking out that he was the only ally we had in this time period.
Oh, I'm an ally.
Yeah.
A friend of everyone's.
Good.
Is your book findable in this time period?
Just curious.
Because otherwise, you're what we call a liability.
No, yeah, that's pretty cool.
Well, you've got your wand.
You have no real other landmarks to point at other than this tree right here.
This tree looks like it may be grew since the last time I was here.
So yeah, there's probably a book.
I mean, I'm dead right now.
Maybe I'm down in the, am I down in the abyss?
Vorunax, can you find out if I'm down in the abyss?
Because if I'm down in the abyss, I'm dead, which means my book is somewhere.
Did you guys pick up my book after I died?
There's kind of a lot going on.
No, they didn't pick up my book.
Well, there was a lot going on.
You crashed a ship.
I did not crash a ship.
You electrocuted everything.
The cult of the dragon crashed the ship.
You did a controlled landing.
I saved everybody.
Also.
Am I down in the abyss?
Yeah, I mean, there's a lot down there.
There's an old wrinkly guy who goes, oh, oh boy.
Yep, you're down there.
Great, great, I'm dead.
You're upsetting the dog.
Yep, the dog's got to poop.
I remember that.
Okay, I'm down in the abyss.
Means my book's somewhere.
We get my book.
Step one, get my book.
Step two, money.
Money?
Okay.
Step three, save the world.
You might actually need money to gather some forces.
That might not be a bad idea, actually.
Do you have a way to find a book?
It could be anywhere in the world.
Where are we?
I need to make a divining rod.
You know, like a divining rod?
Sure, to find water.
Nighthunter just snaps a giant branch off of a tree and goes,
this good?
Well, I can make this work.
He begins walking off into the forest.
While he does that, I'm just going to cast Locate Object.
Yes.
I don't know if it's within range, though.
It's got to be within 1,000 feet of me.
I doubt that's the case.
That would be super convenient, wouldn't it?
Wouldn't it be, yeah, right?
Roll a D100 for us, Kyle.
See if it's in that tree.
Can we do a thing where it opens a map
and it'll like glow on it or something via Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Sure.
We'll get out the Ouija board and it will spell us where it is.
No, you never work with a Ouija board.
Sure.
You're a second-in-command to Orcus.
We'll grant a little bit of a wider net than the 1,000 feet.
So you cast Locate Object.
And yeah, does anybody have a map?
I do.
Totally.
I was ascribed.
I have all sorts of papers.
Great.
One of these is a map.
You cast Locate Object.
Your map begins to like, bzz, bzz.
Oh, it's vibrating.
And I'm like, just one sec.
Your table for four is ready at the Cactus Club.
Oh, wow, you went Dora the Explorer.
I was going Vibrator.
It was two different moves.
Wow, this is very different.
It's like backpack.
I'm not apologizing for anything.
It's on the city of Greenest.
Dumbgeons & Dragons Season 2 Episode 124 starring Amy More as Thea and Night Hunter,
Carla Maxted as Lipsynche, Tom Laird as Flint,
with Kylan Claset as Vorunax, and Russ More as your dungeon master.
Production and sound design by Russ More.
This episode featured music from Epidemic Sound,
and Kavin McLeod of incompetech.filmmusic.io,
and sound effects from Epidemic Sound, Boom Library, and Sound Ideas.
A huge thank you to our supporting producers,
Gabriel Lynch, Jessica Babyok, Cat Waterflame,
Jacob Madden, Christian Brown, Devin Michaels, Craig Zeiss,
Erin Stevens, Daryl Lynn, Lou Lehan, L.A. Branton, Perry Matey,
and Nathaniel Teeter.
You can support us and the shows we create directly
by visiting Patreon.com slash Dumb Dragon Cast.
Help us reach 100 patrons and we'll throw an exclusive improv live show
for every one of our patrons.
Thank you for listening.
Have a great week.
We'll talk again soon.
God, that's the exact fucking thing.
Usually I'm mind melding with Carla, but I'm...
Without a word of a lie,
it was a townsperson handing him freshly baked bread.
And I'm sure I would have liked it if Tom did it too.
But not as much though, right?
Probably not as much.
It goes better with me.
All Tom's would have been was just,
you get some bread.
No, I'm sure Tom is like crossing off like,
bread, flowers.
He gave me some bread.
Oh my God, does he have Nularaaais' soul?
Sounds like it.
I...
Amy has quit the podcast.
Quit.
I know where Nularaaais' soul is, do you?
I put a tracker on it.
Fucking knife, isn't it?
I don't know.
Where's that knife anyway?
Leosin has it?
Mystery.
Dumbgeons & Dragons is a Dumb Dragons production.