DUMBGEONS & DRAGONS

Season 2 • March 16, 2022

E116 - Never Meet Your Maker

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Transcript

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previously on Dumbgeons and Dragons.

Arvid yeah, this reminds me of that one time that you and I

You know back in

Bartholomew. Oh, you've been to Bartholomew. We have a package for that too. Gnolls begin to pour out of the tunnel now

Lead the way the mysteries of the universe will have to wait from now

We need to go come bring it with you. Just just bring it with you. Japes and

Perseus are not part of this group though. They got torn away from the from the

Mass of you. If we're going to get them, we've got to go fast

Remind me next time we see him to put a boot up Uzumaki's ass. Who's Uzumaki? Oh, don't worry, dear. Well

Well, Margaret did we should do we help help?

help

the

Kobold I could

Go on. I could. You could what? As this

Explosion happens behind them shooting this main

Mass of all of these gnolls off into the side giving you just the briefest moment to bolt through them

Welcome to Dumbgeons and Dragons. I'm your dungeon master Russ More. He him also with me today is

Carla maxed it she her I will be playing Lex they them and Amy more

Yeah, she her and I will be playing

Flanks he him and Tom Laird. Yeah, that's me. He him. I will be playing

Perseus who's a he him also joining us today the lovely and talented rev to shame

Hey, he him and I'm playing Margaret broad cloak. She her class. It's here. Yo, yo

He him and I will be playing flanks. No, I'm not playing flanks. No, I'm flanks. Who are you playing?

I don't even know anymore like james james prot spin. I just to give him a last name this time around

Okay. Yeah. Well, I got to write down all of this information. Did you write down flanks last name?

What was flanks last name lake?

And I may be I'm pretty sure I'm also gonna be playing Vorunax this episode shut your face he's dead

Yeah, he is. Never mind that james is the new bad guy. We just haven't gotten there yet story art

We've got a couple more time jumps to go through for that one. That's right younger james. Well, we'll see what happens with james prot spin

You can listen to the downtime that we did for the last episode which a spoiler alert

Because we didn't accomplish anything

Of great importance

There wasn't a lot to talk about but we still had fun diving into what happened between

Last episode and where we're gonna pick up in this episode. There's

So go check it out Patreon.com slash dump dragon cast where when you're a patron you will also have an episode dedicated

To you like today's patron

Lawrence Welsh jr

Just gonna say our fanciest listener maybe are you royalty when you're a Patreon member of Dumbgeons and Dragons you're absolutely royalty

See this is why we keep inviting Kyle back

Say you're like the very talented and also other great things rev and Kyle's here

I

Noticed it was very distinct. It was Kyle. You're here. No, I understand look and

Look, I read hopefully make you feel good every day

I read the script as commas the lovely and talented rev to Shane and Kyle class. It's here

No

Me just showed up

Com slash dumb dragon cast. Please join us over there Kyle's there, too

See if you can find me

Fuck it. Let's play

We join the group being led by Japs and flanks as Japs has gone into a

a tour guide mode

I was gonna say about of dementia as they have evaded the pack of gnolls that was

Chasing them deeper into the underdark. You see and that's stalactite over there

You can tell by the guano on it that

Bats like to stay there when they sleep and

So how is that different than the other all those other stalactites that also?

Had the bat guano is that yes. This tour is very guano based. I'm noticing

Yeah, well, you got to know where get ready to get the good guano

So that you know if you need to hide down here, you can look like a piece of shit and not get noticed

Should I be writing this down mood? It's in your hand, but you'll see

I see some branding some like hand cream

Yeah, it's good. It's good gives you nice supple skin look

I don't have many wrinkles and why do you think I don't do you sell that t-shirt back at the store?

No, but if you make it before me, I'll kill you takes this branding very seriously. That's right

I should it be like one that says like I don't look like shit. It's just the guano. Yeah, that's good

Okay, you're gonna go far in this business. I'm telling you flanks. Thanks, sir, or perhaps. It's a product placement guano

Blend in by looking like shit. Yeah guano. You didn't the further you go into the underdark

Don't advertise that

Right in check that we cannot catch the jokes might get a little deeper but not much better

Quick Russ interrupt us

The further you go into the underdark the it's gonna sound silly but it's gonna get dark darker it gets

That makes you've entered an area where the the bioluminescent materials

seem to have been

eroded or

Like removed due to heavy traffic

You look up ahead and this cavern that you're in

Funnels to a point and leads down a long hallway

Even those who are so inclined to see better than others in the dark have trouble seeing down to the end of this

hallway, all right

Right this way hold on flanks goes through his pack and pulls out a torch

Ah

Yeah, it's good another that bio light and it's gone, you know, I

Kind of just get a feel for it. My feet feel it out

I gotta take the shoes off a little while ago and oh your barefoot. Oh, yeah

You get a real feel for the underdark with these toes

Flanks lights the torch. I said take your shoes off kid. I'm sorry good

Don't forget you're getting paid to be here

You follow the code but he's a cobalt so I think you just like had like bread bags

I don't understand the shoe mechanics

Special order

Yeah, the benefits didn't quite cover the whole thing

Yeah

I never do japs and flanks with torch and no shoes in hand

Lead the way down this tunnel leaving the four of you back just a just a hair

In order to have any conversation you might want to have well, we're still alive. So

That's

Something yes, and

At least it feels like we are going

Deeper so we're going the right direction. We got away from those gnolls

So I mean maybe all the other tour guides would have been

even stranger and had a bushier eyebrows and never wore shoes you follow behind japs and flanks and

This tunnel narrows so much so that you're going single file

You hear

the scurrying of

What could be rodents down at your feet

like bugs

spiders

moving along the ceiling and there's this it's

Deathly silent except for all of these over accentuated

Noises coming from whatever wildlife is is existing in this space

You hear japes mumbling up ahead

Yes

No, and that one's furry and the echo that's reverberating down this this tunnel

dampens as he enters into this wide open chamber that is

Completely dark as flanks follows in behind him the light from his torch disappears before you

Four of you

stop

to evaluate before proceeding forward I

Take my mace out and see if the light from it

penetrates his darkness

It begins to illuminate and then it shone shone's on the walls and you can see

Like bugs scurrying back into holes and everything disappearing

but then it's like there's this wall of blackness before you and it if it was reflective you feel like it would

Reflect the same as the walls around you back to you

But it's like it eats the light. Do you hear them? Mike? I can't see them anymore. I don't I don't particularly love

this

should we

form a

Chain, I don't

Does that sound silly but if we join hands we would

Be together

We would yes, we would be at least not separated much like planks and japs

God rest their souls wherever they are beyond this dark void. Oh

Blanks japs are they are it are they I don't I don't hear them. Oh

Oh

And I will put the mace away and and take out the daggers

That I that I got when we were shopping we talked about this right before we started recording trying to figure out what it was

They glow as they get closer together in case we lost each other in the dark

So we would could use them like way finders to find out. Yes. Okay. That's what it was. Yep. Thank you

It was yes, we're together

Amazing yeah all four useful. I mean Arvid pulls his out. Yeah. Yeah Lex as well. Yeah

Yeah, Margaret will hold both her hands out

Let's give it a shot

the four of you proceed forward Margaret in the lead everybody else following behind daggers glowing and as you

Step to and then through this darkness

Everything kind of just shunts around you sound is gone

Any

Visuals that you have are gone. You can still feel the hand of the person behind you

Who is?

Sweaty I feel like Lex is probably at the back. Okay, Lex is at the back

So we'll say I'll take maybe Perseus then Arvid. Okay. Okay, who is Perseus?

Who could be sweaty Lex wouldn't have been sweaty so that that would have been a clarification

Just a more of sort of generally clammy at all times, yeah

And everybody else as you step forward and through you see like there's it's like it's almost like walking through

Putting your hand through murky water like it you lose all visual of it

Margaret make and

It's

Spooky in here, it's real scary make us check. I mean

But make a perception check at

Disadvantage I have advantage normally. Okay. Yeah

For all your good rolling needs yeah, so 27

As you step into this you

in your years of

Monster hunting take a moment and just kind of hold

Perseus back as you try and get any sense of what you're feeling and seeing and

Although you can't see anything you you feel

Minor

Vibrations coming from the air around you like it's these clicking noises that are

Distant at this point

Where you are?

If you proceed forward

The clicking even as you take a couple steps like the clicking becomes erratic and

As you stop moving it slows

Does this sound

Like anything that I have encountered before as you take a few steps just trying to to gauge without

Going too far as to potentially run into something you get a feeling that it is it sounds like

some sort of undead creature or creatures and a lot of them

Who are

more

stationary

just kind of like

Muscle twitches and bone cracks

Oh boy

Like we can't go back

One because I guess we don't exactly even know where back is I mean

We'll say that I mean yes, it would be skewed

So you might not be able to make it back or anyway, but you walked in a straight line, right? So

Perception in the dark perception in the dark would be skewed

So yeah, you're right would have to turn a complete 180 and be pointing the exact same way

we can kind of feel that we're in a big space, but visually and

Even kind of what we hear it's yeah, you can't see this you you and you specifically are hearing this

Just I'm giving you that because of your super monster hunting

And

Experience that your character has like knowing that it seems like we're supposed to go through here to try and get

To wherever we're going next

I don't think I can do anything except

Try to use that clicking sound as a like, okay, I'm gonna go a little this way now and try to navigate between

The clicking it's like a reverse

Echolocation yeah, yeah, I like it

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Russ I'm assuming that this total darkness that we are in counts as total cover

because if not I have divine sense and

I can detect undead within 60 feet. Oh, you're you're but

You're detecting all over the place your Geiger counters

That's what's making the clicking

That's what it is, but yeah, so okay, so yeah Margaret you sense

All around you which you can equate to

Closest equation is is some sort of undead

More surrounding you the further you go in Lex as you step into this darkness like yeah your your sense of

Undead is

Just through the roof, right?

Do you want to do anything or attempt to do anything with that you as we described it in terms of walking order?

You are holding Arvid's hand. I don't know cuz I think right now

Like being as silent as possible is the best

Option rather than yelling guys is undead

Scatter they can't get us all

Okay

You all proceed forward with Margaret leading Margaret roll me a

joint

I'll let you pick here either

insight

Going off of

where you're sensing all of

Where like the sounds are coming from and trying to locate those as you're getting closer or farther from them or

Perception yeah

perception if it's

listening very closely to get a gauge of how close those clicks are and then finding

The direction where it's a little quieter because basically trying to

Walk around

Okay, this is like that Mario Party one where you try not to step on all the banana peels

But the banana peels are undead

Exactly. That's the one that

22

Margaret begins to move forward and is listening to these sounds and like we can

you know from the cameras point of view like we're we're we're spinning around and swirling around all four of you and

Margaret you're sensing as you get closer and using your

Hand on Perseus to kind of signal as you're turning Perseus roll an insight

That is a 17 you definitely sense that Margaret senses something based on the the pulses in hers in her squeeze

And is guiding you through and you're able to to pass down the line as well

You're weaving in and out of these noises that are getting louder and quieter like it's almost to the point where you feel like

Like something brush up against just the edge of like a sleeve that you have

Until you get

You've been walking for what I presume is very slowly

for several minutes and

And then you hear this this pulse

In this darkness around you you hear like a

Crackling and almost like this sucking noise as it pulls in towards you

From the outside looking in it pulls in towards you until the room is clear

And you are in the middle of this

Almost military line of this room of complete of undead of

mangled monsters of pieced together beings

Who are all standing at all

What could be described as at attention?

facing one direction towards

The this this raised dais this raised platform at the end of this cavern

You're in the middle of this

There's this clicking of all of these joints is like the the muscles are spasming in and hands are shooting out in different directions

But they're not moving

Is there anyone on that raised platform not immediately roll a wisdom saving throw?

17 20 dirty 13 Arvid rolled to an 11

Margaret and Arvid are going to take which isn't on your character sheets

12 sanity damage

Russ looking around at these things now that we're able to kind of see them better like do they resemble

What Lex is like yes, there are definitely element like yeah

They are pieced together beings of many other beings most of them

majority of them humanoid in fact everybody make a

Perception check

Margaret and Arvid at disadvantage for 10

15

Everybody sees that they are

Very similar in that they are pieced together from many different beings and humanoids and and perhaps even other

creatures, but Lex you specifically notice that the the facial construction of them is all

Very similar not not to yourself. Just be clear about that

but all very similar to one another and

Even looking at them like the build is

Almost to a design point very similar to one another

The the the parts maybe have to been taken from many different

creatures or beings but the size of them is all

Like almost cookie cutter do they seem to be?

Creatures of the underdark piece together or like not necessarily the gangs all here. Okay, the gangs all here

Yeah, yeah, there's a lot of more humanoid and even human

Probably majority is human or humanoid and how many are there you are in a cavern that is

Let's place it at

200 to 250 feet across on all sides and they are all in lines

Standing at attention and are they nude? No

Great question

No, they all appear to be in

Damaged or not great condition, but they all appear to be an armor and have weapons

swords axes maces

Degrees it looks like we've we've found someone's

Army. Yes, isn't that what we were afraid?

Was being built and we've also lost our guides

looking back

At like the door that we came in. Yeah, does it exist? Is there like a film over it?

No, it does exist. Like there's a

I

Think there's no real light coming from it, but there is you can see where you came in

You would place yourself probably pretty close to the middle of the room

Maybe a little bit back from middle so closer to the tunnel, but still

150 to 175 feet out and the only other way out of this room is that is the dais?

Yeah, there's a raised platform

Which you can't quite see all the way back but yeah, that's the only egress that you can tell are

the tunnel you came in or

What's up there?

Well, I suppose the only way is

forward

Right Arvid Marcius Margaret. I don't

We know what's back there. It's many many

gnolls who

Truly dislike us. Yeah, they were not fans

No

so

it seems we have a

Moment here and I'd like to get away from this army

Before they decide to wake up

Yes

Yeah

I'm with you Lex like always is there stairs up to the platform or am I going to awkwardly try and jump?

Like I did in the stage in high school when I was like getting up on the thing and then you like kind of can

Get up, but you forget you're short and then you're just kind of like roll on to it

Anybody else yo every day. That's right. I imagined it like a

Mahin dais

Yeah, I don't know

Steps up there

And then like

Yeah, yeah, I like that one that's a door that's what I had written down every time we say door in D&D

I am like it is a drywall door. That thing is

Golden knob you have to turn it to lock it. There's this one door jam just in the middle

So my brain does okay?

before of you looking around

evaluating your circumstance

Begin to go forward towards the the dais and

As you begin to move forwards, and you get another 50 feet

there's this crackle of energy above you and

You look up and you see two swirling portals and out of them drop tied to chains are

japes and flanks

Are we gagged I'm gagged nice

Japes is gagged by him by himself

One of his socks is off. It's in his mouth

The whole like I can fit my fist into my mouth and like no you can not

I can here's where we're at for you to you walked into the darkness, and you were like vacuum sucked

Pneumatic tubes yeah

tubes okay, so you two are dangling from these portals

Midway above

By chains, there's this swirling purple black energy above you as

That happens like it reverberates through the room and the clicks from all of the undead around you begin to increase in

frequency and they are almost

Pulsing with the energy and the sound that's flowing through the building

To the building fuck like this is a warehouse

Cavern and

As you stop and look at that you hear just like this slow clap

Begin from the far side where you were walking forward to guys

It's almost never happens, and if this could baby not reflect on your review of the company that would be great

Please please be shush

I

Know what he said slow clapping begins, and it gets louder and louder has you are

Stopped I presume unless unless you don't want to stop you tell me what you want to do well. I mean if that's a

Clicking and popping of all the weird

Frankenstein monsters are getting worse like I would think we'd be moving quicker if anything

Are they gonna start pop and lock in yeah?

So long as they try wouldn't it be cool. Just turns in your just electric slide

You're actually part of a flash

There but you're there now it's worse than an undead

Yeah, no I agree I think yeah just

the sounds increasing would like increase the speed of

Even though we're walking towards some asshole that's slow clapping

Guys we're gonna need to we got to get out of here. We got to move quicker

But I know I know there's but let's just go for it. We need to move

I don't want to be stuck right in the middle here if they

reanimate

Four of you begin to run as quickly and as as nimbly as you can trying not to bump any of the undead

that are just

Sporadically like shooting out an arm in front of you and you're ducking below them

And you get up near the front and as this clapping gets louder like you're losing

perspective as this person is walking forward or this individual is walking forward as

This person as this individual steps into view this long

white blonde hair is like it's being blown by fans and

They have this dark

Purple ebony skin as they are clapping and

Smiling down towards you when they say

lax

My goodness, it's been so long

and

My vision that I saw like I recognized this person

Okay, the instant you see them

They are the one who came in being carried by undead floating into the room to murder Nick real

That's how we're starting that's a great start

That's it just as exasperated we're here welcome to the middle everybody

We'll break from the action for you

It was a whole it was a whole wild session that we just recorded which wasn't the session that you're listening to you

But this one is also a wild session

But look forward to that because whoo boy epic coming your way

What also is epic is we are doing a live show for our patrons when you join us at Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast

We hit 90 patrons so for that goal. We're gonna do a live streamed improv show

Where we take suggestions and build the build the session and and world that we're in and play the characters through

Whatever you want us to hear so if you want to be at that

That's not a thing

You want to hear if you want to be at that no no

Whatever you want us to hear is what I said no whatever you want to hear or whatever you want us to say

You know because you give us a suggestion

During the improv so yeah that makes more sense

But join us at Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast on or before March 30th

To get your invite to that live show

So if you are a patron you can check your email that you subscribe to Patreon in

You should have a calendar invite. That's that's waiting there for you to click. Yes

Attending yeah to click that yes smash the button. There's no no or maybe click the yes, maybe is wishy-washy

Definitely not a maybe yeah like

But I mean like say yes, yeah, it's gonna be great the last ones we did were great

I mean, I think I can safely say we have literally no idea. What's going to happen

Yeah, but that's I mean most the times when we play that's like every record session to the hundred percent

But this time people will be witnessing it live. They might think it's like we put it on

They'll see us process everything in real time and be like oh, no. This is what it's like

Editing does rust do a lot folks a lot there there really was only three bullet points for those episodes

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Legs it's it's Prim's bottom. Oh, I know

I've been hoping to meet you. We've met before but it's so good to see you again

The memory the memory yes, I've been hoping to meet you when I knew yeah, that was

What you are ah

Thelonious Prim's Bane pleasure to meet you

I'm here to bring death and destruction for the sole purpose of just I'm bored down here in the underdark

Really, I kind of piggybacked off of some other things happening, but you don't know about those

So murder of Nick a real murder probably of all these creatures, that's not enough no

Yeah, Nick a real Nick a real Nick a real was a victim of circumstance see Vic

brought Nick a real in on the ground floor of this whole

Organization that I have as you look around here. You see an image

One of my dear dear friends

Leon in glory jam

Brought them into the organization also at the ground floor because they had just the physique that I was looking for

Nick a real had the power Nick a real had the the abilities

You know combined with my just garish good looks and excellent charm and ability to get

And sorry pure disgusting evil

Well, it's all in the eye of the beholder we have one of those two hiding somewhere around here, but uh, that's neither here nor there

It's so good of you to come home and bring me

new subjects

No, what we've brought is

Death and the end of you

Is sort of more

What we were thinking and all of you just given the circumstance

And he looks to the rest of the group here and even up to flanks and japes all of you feel the same

That this is a winning scenario

for you

Well, you do have an undead army, but if we can kill you I suppose that's enough to keep them immobile

Mm-hmm

Mm-hmm

Right I should mention the two from the ceiling really

They seem to be the master employees I don't want to

This isn't they triggered the initial trap that I was hoping was for you because we saw you coming and then

But they were I don't I don't agree with the health and safety conditions employees are put in by

Take you away or come away with me or your safety is our number one priority

That's right. Oh, you got your fist out. Yeah. Yeah, it

Kind of my jaw dropped when I saw how what an amazing army

You've got down here and for you fine for we've we've delivered you to where you need to be. Yes. Yes, you should

return

To your storefront. Yes head home

unharmed and

Undamaged Oh right primsbane. They will just they will just they will just leave this place

unharmed and undamaged

Sure, he snaps his fingers and the chains suck up into the portals

clothes and

They're gone as I get sucked up a bag drops

From my like how big is this bag?

um

Yay

Yay, surprise. Okay, I was guys surprise. I like bag a holding situation

More of a satchel. Yeah, okay. Got it. Okay, it it just falls. Nothing. Nothing happens to it

I don't know what you put into this bag. So I know but

Player knowledge character. No, I know that's Ross. That's that's fine

It's awfully shiny though

Very gemmy the bag is shiny bag the dazzled bag. I love it. Yeah

Flanks releases a bedazzled bag. You hear the scream it falls to the ground

And you hear it like bounce off of one of these undead who begins to snarl

Primsbane snaps his fingers again and it stops and the clicking comes back. I

Don't know what that was but

They're gone they've they've left

Totally unharmed as previously arranged

So what's the next move?

As he asked that question, I want to cast misty step to the location of the bag and go grab it

Okay, what is misty? Yeah remind to me remind to me remind to me

I am briefly surrounded by silvery mist and I teleport up to 30 feet to an unoccupied space that I could see

He he's he asked that new

Mist kind of envelopes you and you appear

Right at the bag

What's in the bag?

You want to know what's in the bag? What's in the bag reaches down picks it up and opens it our receipt

And

A comment card for us to fill out bag 39.99

Okay, so well, I mean this has got to be care every player knowledge because there's no way for character to know this

This is the bag of devouring it is capable of killing an unsuspecting party

It takes the shape of a bag of holding

Hiding its malicious nature like a wolf in sheep's clothing. But once the player reaches into the bag

There's a 50% chance that they're pulled inside

Any creature who starts their turn inside the bag is instantly and entirely devoured

Other players may attempt to pull people inside of the bag out

But first they must avoid being pulled in themselves and second. They must beat a DC 20 strength check yummy

Just open you didn't say you reached any just said he opened it and looked inside

So don't let this knowledge sway what you do with the bag

I was hoping Thelonious would have

Case era, okay, we all say sometimes

No, it's it's the bag of devouring. I know what the bag excuse you. I'm not gonna look at all your other stuff

That's right. I've been texting with Kyle

That's right secret stuff

Obviously we can do now that we're dead in a

Somewhere no return

Your last words as you were pulled through the portal was it's all blades in here

Perseus you grab it. It has like the this intricate was it's it's bedazzled

It's completely bedazzled it has like this almost face bedazzled into it

You open it up and you look inside and it looks like this black void

Make a an arcana check. I've got a great arcana bonus y'all. That is a 27

Okay, you know

Or get a strong sense that this is a bag with an extra dimensional plane

built within it or

Crafted within it being as it previously hit one of the undead things that was it was next to

Can I like?

Put it over said undead things head see what happens. Yes, you're still surrounded in miss

Stepping around making shit in an instant. This is happening. So misty step

You pick it up you look at it and Thelonious is kind of just observing what's happening as you you

evaluate that this this could possibly be a bag of holding and you put it on top of

The head of one immediately beside you

Roll me a d20

High it doesn't take it away low

It does take it away ten these teeth begin to form around the edge of it and it begins to chomp down on

this this zombie creature and swallow it whole as like this clicking and and

groaning and

Trashing begins to happen around this

Until it's completely gone, which is no more than a couple seconds

And the bag lies on the ground beside you does it comically burp afterwards?

Yes

I'm so satisfied right now

Well, that was fun

Is that how you're gonna get them all?

Gotta catch them all in your back. I

Mean I could just go like this

He snaps and a zombie right beside Margaret begins to turn and

Throws out its arms and then he snaps again and it stops holding its place. I could do that

This is a fun game

You decide what you want to do and then I activate all the dead know the dead done dead. It's just great

I think that

Or you could let me take your friends back to my place

Turn them into

helpers and

You come take your place here, which is where you were supposed to be. I mean he was giving you sentience

He was giving you memory you were supposed to be mine

I

Think I'm gonna try and shoot an arrow at him actually across Bobo cuz that's what I have is across bow go for it

It's not gonna work guys, but he's really pissing me off

Let those emotions run free

16

16 will hit well, that's a terrible rule. That was a four

You can do a thing where I can give him there. It is

divine smite

He is going to

Get an extra 2d8 radiant damage plus 1d8

That let's just say like 4d8. Sure. Love it 12d8. Let's do

Like per level

So 12 plus 5 is 17 plus 5 is

22

Radiant damage

In like a flash like over the heads of everybody else this this crossbow just quickly

zips towards Thelonious and impales in his

I won't give you a kill shot. Where do you want to hit him? I wish I could remember what he did to

Make a reel, but let's just be honest. I'm gonna all I want to do is hit him

So I'm aiming for like the mass of his body. So sure

You hit him like in the in the chest and the ribs they often to the left and he he crumples

And like snaps it off

Why

Why I mean I

What why why why why why I

Brought you into this world. I could take you out. I'm gonna try and hit him with another one

Oh, no, that's a nothing 17 he's prepared on this one. Yeah, and a shield goes up around him

In this huge dome and it glances off and shoots off into the into the distance and he turns and you see him

Throw his arms up into the air

like looking back down the catwalk away from

And you see another figure walk out a

Larger imposing dragonborn come out carrying this this long staff

It's kind of swinging it around like a baseball bat

It's probably not good. Did you name it Lucille walks through and into

He walks through and into this dome. You don't hear anything that's happening

But you see them conversing inside

What do you what do you three do

What do you three do

For do it's Thelonious is clearly throwing a temper tantrum to whoever this other figure is

I think still approaching like at least for Lex right now. That's

They're just having kind of a one-track mind like

This is the MF er that killed my daddy. So I don't like you

So just advancing as I can because obviously my best weapon is not my crossbow I want to get

up up close

Perseus is trying to cut a swath through these guys with the bag of devouring

Okay

and Margaret

yeah, I

Put away the dagger and get out the mace in the shield and just shoulder to shoulder

Well, not really shoulder shoulder shoulder to thigh

Okay, and I get Arvid Arvid's following him behind

Just making sure that nothing begins to move behind you as you're moving forward and as you get closer

you you you see you begin to climb up this dais and you see Thelonious turn around and his eyes have gone from a

Like a milky white to a deep black

And everybody make a dexterity saving throw as like this heat energy begins to form

16

14 as

you're climbing up this dais you feel like this is this heat energy forming beneath you and

And

Thelonious turns and his eyes are completely black and then there's like this

this flame

Radiance coming from him as he screams

But you don't hear anything because of the shield that he's put up around him and this other this other figure and this fireball

erupts blowing out the stone of the dais and blowing

Lex and Arvid off and back into the mass of the army

who begin clicking and throwing themselves into like these fits of rage and

groaning as you fall onto your back and take 46 fire damage

Margaret you're gonna take half of that. You don't get blown off the dais, but you are kind of resting on top of it

And Lex also only takes half

Because of the ring that Margaret gave her so long ago. I take half of Lex's damage

Son of a bitch, right? Yeah

Rev play in the game

Thelonious's scream begins to echo out as the shield around him waivers this fireball

erupting and creating heat throughout the entire space and with an echoing crack

Thelonious throws his hands together and every single undead creature along the floor of this cavern

begins to move towards

Dumbgeons and Dragons season 2 episode

116 starring Karla Max dead as Lex Tom Laird as Perseus

Amy More as flanks with Kyle Claset as JAPES rev to Shane as Margaret broadcloak and Russ more as your dungeon master

Editing production and sound design by Russ More this episode featured music from epidemic sound and sound effects from epidemic sound boom

Library and sound ideas a huge. Thank you to our supporting producers Gabriel Lynch

Jessica Babyok cat water flame Jacob Madden Christian Brown Devin Michaels Craig Zeiss Aaron Stevens

Daryleth Lulahan

Charlie Warley and LA Branton to support Dumbgeons and Dragons and our many other productions and get access to an exclusive

Podcast called the adventures of bonus episodes and much more

Please join our Patreon at Patreon.com

Slash dumb dragon cast join us on or before March 30th

2020 to join us for an improvised live show exclusive to patrons have a great week. We'll talk again soon

We cut to a chamber just off the back of the dais and we see a different perspective we see

The figure inside of the dome and felonious his face who's

arguing and screaming at him and then we see

Flanks and JAPES who are bound by the chains just off the cavern

What are these two fucking arguing about back here? They're saying a lot of shit about undead and taking over the world

I don't fucking get do you think they figured out how to use that fucking bag?

I don't know. I really hope so. I was only about 50% sure to use it myself. Maybe they need adventuring guides

Maybe they're on their own adventure and we can guide them wherever they're headed

Well, you got a you got to work on your pitch kids. So batter up

Because that one was carrying a baseball bat thing. So, you know, I thought it was a shot at my voice

My mom said I'll leave it out. No, no, I mean we kind of have almost a similar voice really

Yeah, so do I get to go through an older person be ready at some point?

Yeah, it kind of happens towards the tail end of things, but you'll get there maybe what do you mean?

Maybe I you'd have to ask the other five whenever you get to where they went

Everybody tells too tight you guys

It's getting serious it's getting serious I'm loosening my ponytail I don't plan that far

He doesn't know what's making the click

Deal

Somebody did some slam poetry somewhere and everyone just like Jetson the Sharks pop out Perseus rolling in sight

Time that better if I tried

That's great these are my own feelings and facial expressions Russell you don't need to interrupt your diet try to react to my reaction

Sorry

Let me hide self

Dumbgeons and Dragons is a dumb dragons production