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previously on Dumbgeons and Dragons.
you're a man of the world so it's it's fine well i thought you were going to offer me a place to stay
no that's cool no all right okay so go i am ken i am stretching my maybe limbs
i'm bursting free from my my side womb the four of you are walking down the the alleyway
and it's getting pretty dark moot you notice what looks like a young boy meet me in the
graveyard guys it's so creepy in here what do you mean it's just i mean it's dark and i know
it's the final resting place of a lot of people you see a small boy in a dark hooded
tunic he has a third eye right in the middle of his forehead the demon gates are opening
your destiny it calls
welcome to Dumbgeons and Dragons we're a D&D fifth edition actual play podcast and i'm
your dungeon master Russ More and with me today is tom laird hey that's me i play moot he is a
half orc wild magic sorcerer and Amy More i play sullivan slight a lightfoot halfling rogue
and also carla max dead yes i play narixious Akra who you probably know as glim she's a
dragonborn pAlydin and she's gonna save the world you know i've heard about this this
destiny gets around like people are starting to hear about it which is crazy i can't wait to
see if she can cash this check that her mouth has been writing first real adventure that you
go on all dead oh could you imagine how disappointing well maybe it's a good life
lesson though because if that happens i mean she'll be dead so is it a life lesson doesn't
matter no yeah because if that happens she'll be dead it won't matter and if it doesn't happen
then there was no harm in her believing very strongly in herself it's true so we should all
believe very strongly in ourselves what i'm saying this goes a long way that's the moral
of the story yeah where we believe in you and where you should believe in yourself is
over on Patreon Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast where if you join our community you as a
patron among all of the amazing amazing exclusive content that we have over there
they should make exclusive an easier word to say super secret super secret
stuff that we have over there but also you get an episode dedicated to you like today's
patron nate hacking thank you i believe in you nate that's right and thank you for believing in us
yes thank you nate
carlos i'm trying to turn this into a motivational podcast secretly i don't know
if you guys have noticed i have noticed a few things with this storyline this is a backdoor
pilot for my other podcast that is a motivational podcast why aren't we putting
this in the production house here like let's capitalize on this let's not send it somewhere
else it wouldn't be a secret podcast if it was over here he's like pilot for a new podcast
yeah let's do it done sold get it up on Patreon i can't do any more podcasts you guys
i'm a teacher now yeah amy went and got herself a real job i did yay it's all right
well you still got to carve out tuesday nights i can carve out tuesday night good because it's on the
calendar for the rest of forever it's just a repeating date that and it was like end date
and rest was like no weekly till the end of time you know forever until tia matt inevitably
rises and kills us all good there's a survey out on the wizards page right now for dnd
players and i was at work today and i had to spare 20 minutes it's a very long survey
they do them every quarterly but yeah yeah but uh there was numerous questions about like how
often do you play dnd in a week and how and it was just like i just had to put so many
answers in about how i play like at least once a week and i was like oh god what have i done
with my life and it's like well how many how many groups are you a part of and i was like
well currently two maybe sometimes a third oh god it's too much you are right in their
wheelhouse you're who they go after fuck it let's play dnd the wind around you
begins to kick up as you stand face to face with this ghostly three-eyed boy
way the demon gates are opening he says your destiny it calls
anyone else curious that this little guy sounds like a full-grown man
what's a demon gate i'm more curious about the three eyes are you talking about my destiny
i don't like a group are you talking to me i mean you guys are tied into my destiny
we're all we are we're all together on this crazy roller coaster ride of saving the world
oh shit i didn't know that i don't know if i really signed up for that though
oh um well maybe we should talk about it later how about this kid with the full-grown man voice
and the three eyes and the ghostly presence right i mean yeah i would love to know more
about this yeah we're gonna circle back to this whole destiny thing though later i think
like this is something that probably should have came up organically you know like over time
like it's been a couple years and you're just like we all just kind of know it but now
it's a lot of pressure yeah it feels like it feels like maybe this is something that like
would cause people to maybe crumble under said pressure
i don't know sully what do you what do you feel about this so what about
this kid with the three eyes and the manly voice i just told you some important shit what
are you doing res is dying there's a good chance we did carla you know i don't remember shit
i somehow i was so i was so sure we talked about this
i don't i don't think we did i think it's true maybe we did
i feel like i've said very clear things to both of you about how we were supposed to meet and
well yeah i just thought you were just super enthusiastic yeah and you always talk about
how like your destiny is to save the world i just didn't realize it was like a team thing
nobody can save the world by themselves our destiny is to save the world it's just nice
to be included you know i mean i guess maybe you're right mood the boy looks to his
imaginary watch this is not the kind of threesome i imagine myself having that's all i'm
saying and says i don't realize what i've just walked into here i don't have much time he sounds
like a boy he knows i'm here who knows you're here and as he says that the ground at the base
of the tombstones around you begins to shake why isn't this isn't good follow the signs
help those you can
and be prepared for battle
cracks begin to form as earth is heaved up near your feet
oh what exactly are we going to be battling though
the boy could be more specific the boy looks around nervously at this point and says you
mean specific that's what i said he lead he leaps towards you and suddenly his face is
right in front of you and his lips begin moving like they're trying to form words as
he begins to fade from sight and you hear one final word ring out in your mind
and then he's gone and the earth settles the wind dies down and all is calm
guys i think that we're about to be
be i think that orcas are orcas are gonna take guva
whale people are gonna some kind of underground whale people is this like is there is this
anything to do with orcs because i'm a half orc but i've never heard of orcas oh you know
what though maybe i maybe he said dorkus yo how much do you guys know about about sings
oh god jesus how long you been here i've been here the whole time i don't
has this been the most quiet you've ever been in your whole life jesus look my my voice
are he was voicing somebody else at this moment so he could not i don't know what that means
can i roll a history check to see if i've heard of orcas yes absolutely i don't worry
history or religion whichever my religion should be better but it's not somehow well maybe not all
religion like you just have the one religion you know um that's only a 12 yeah with the 12
you definitely have heard of orcas he is the um demon lord prince of the undead
that currently resides in the abyss which you believe to be the home of the demons of the world
that you know so maybe he was just insulting us right he was like dorkus no no you guys
orcas he's like the the prince of the undead demon lord lives in the abyss where
all the demons live didn't you ever hear scary stories about him when you were a kid
what and this guy is coming for us well i mean kind of kind of sounds like maybe
do you think he is coming for you three specifically or maybe just the world in general
i mean your destiny could be to stop certain aspects but
but maybe maybe you are thinking very highly of yourselves well it's apparently our destiny to
save the world that is true and this orcas fellow seems like maybe he wants the opposite
of that yeah but i don't think that means he's coming after us he's probably coming after the
world and then maybe someone should get in between him and the world and have a little
aren't those someone's us well yeah but that's what i'm saying is like i don't think like oh
so you think prince of the underworld okay i got you i got you even knows about us right like
he will probably crush us like ants should we like speaking of which i used to be a
professional uh christiologist oh and i used to go from home to home and
and tom keep it there and i used to crush things for a living like i mean you mentioned
ants but other things too oh yeah the insects um rocks that are small enough to crush
nuts did you do a lot of nut work did you ever crush any you crushed all the nuts did you
oh did i crush what oranges did you ever crush an orange
um what about grapes oh yeah i crushed a few grapes in my time of course oranges though
that's weird you squeeze an orange well i mean really squeezing is just crushing from a different
angle slowly crushing yes it's much more controlled i sorry have you guys ever ever been a
a crush christiologist well you changed the name of the job so well it depends on whether
you're using it as a verb right now
that's that's cool so i mean wait to be fair we don't know the ins and outs of crush ology or
crush ology or the terminology of crush ology so we just as always have to defer to our
expert in all matters job related yeah no worries about i'm used to being around people
who just don't quite have the same standard of understanding of the world that i have
so what are we going to do about this darkest guy um well training montage all right this is
great did we ever um all make out drunkenly no no not yet where did we find did we figure
out where ken ended up who's ken ken is your lump your best friend we were on the trail yeah
no sorry that's just where we've we were trying to find can and we ran into a boy and no no
the whole reason we came here was we were following ken and then that boy showed up well
i thought that boy was ken i thought like you know mystery solved maybe you maybe you maybe
you three remembered incorrectly but we was looking for ken and then and then the boy wonder
over here who is shorty shorty sin he he saw the ghosty boy down the alley down in the alley
and he's like come to the graveyard and so we did and we had the baguette on the way it was
very good and now we are here yes and we're a little bit more french than we were when we
first came this is the same accent i just edited an entire episode it was french there
was a lot of talk of baguettes that's true that was very very horny for baguettes so many baguettes
we went to el torcho's that's just with the meat with all the meat so much meat cooked the
meats it was so wonderful um did you get from the three-eyed boy any kind of ken vibes i
know you guys were really like connected i guess i thought these were two separate weird
male presenting people people tight one tiny that came out of your body and one floating and
ghosty and three is what i don't know it's like maybe the tiny thing that came out of my body
grew up real fast i mean at first it wasn't even a lump and then it was a lump and then
it was too big to be a lump this thing's probably 18 feet by now oh well that'll make
them easier to find that's true looks up at the tree did this did this three-eyed boy leave
any footprints because because ken was leaving footprints all over the place
well if you guys are just gonna poke holes in my theory maybe like like offer something new
are there more footprints can we should we go back to the alley i don't know i mean i think
the the we were the the everything went dry for us because we took a turn and now i don't
remember where i am also look at the ground underneath our feet do you guys think dead people
are gonna start to grab at us at any minute i mean i wasn't until now i didn't think so
yet i mean graveyards are places where people are put to rest and they're very
peaceful and lovely and i don't know why you have to room graveyards for me
me why i didn't do this graveyards are her favorite time to go sit down and have quiet her time
are you spying on her no how do you know it's her favorite quiet it just seemed like she was
inferring that you were ruining her quiet time well i suggest we move this conversation maybe
out of the graveyard because it's super creepy as fuck oh i mean okay okay do you want it we
can go back to the alley and see but sure let's i do think we sort of ran out of footprints but
maybe okay you you head back through the streets uh they've quieted down some since the last time
you you passed through uh it's still very late at night and you make it back to the alleyway
where you had seen the three-eyed boy the first time or moot had seen the three-eyed boy
the first time um and back into the alley can i make a perception roll to see if i see
anything new in terms of tracks or anything like that uh you may make an investigation yes
i want to do that oh it's a 920 oh i rolled a two so i rolled a six so you investigate so good
i do i'm gonna take this shit seriously sully's like i can't believe i forgot about ken there
momentarily just a slight lapse but he feels terrible about it like forgetting you have a
mother or something um i mean the world is crystal clear to you um you i'm in my mind palace
you being that you didn't really remember what you were doing you don't entirely remember what
you were looking for specifically what is it you're looking for looking for any sort of
trace that might tell me where ken went
you you don't see anything to tell you where ken went okay well i make a big show of it though
i go down on one knee i i you know pick up some dust and i touch it to my tongue and i'm like
the trail's gone cold so is it like on ice it is kind of chilly tonight yeah i guess if
what if we're speaking metaphysically sure well maybe we just need a good sleepy sleep on it and
then um can someone sleep in my room with me uh sure yeah absolutely it's could somebody
out sleep in my room with me of course okay cool i like not that i'm scared anything but i mean
let's face it last time i slept by myself i developed a lump who developed a consciousness
of his own and escaped so you know there's that allegedly i mean should we should we all
sleep in the same room and like we can go off on shifts and yeah oh yeah sure that sounds
like a real good plan move that's how we do it on the road you should uh you should jot
that down the whole like doing shifts thing that's how like it seems like an important thing to
to remember can i borrow your pen oh it's a pencil but sure that's not gonna work
sully wanted to write it on his hand okay so you head back to the uh monastery the church
the monastery temple wherever you're going temple that's the word i was looking for you head
back to the temple um and you all pile into one room who's who's taking for
who's taking first shift dibs not on first shift i'll take first shift he lays down
and is immediately asleep um glim i presume you are sleeping as well yes
um hillip has followed you and he is also in the room so it just uh yeah we're just uh
yeah it's cozy up here all nice and warm and and good and stuff yeah
okay sorry sorry no talking um all right uh moot roll me percentile dice oh fancy
that is a 54
this is not not what i had planned for so i gotta just gotta go with it well we had zero plan so
we decided to go to bed like like all good storytellers do when when they've run out of
things to talk about the night um okay so you rolled me a 54 uh and then also roll me a
a constitution saving throw
plus three that is a 17 you you stay up for your shift and you hear a few arguments going on
outside the window you take a look out and you see um a a goblin and a human arguing in
the alleyway the goblin seems to be trying to shake down the human from what you can tell
but that's the only thing of real note all right i gently wake up glim
and head on to sleep myself what kind of wake or upper are you are you like a gentle
shoulder shoulder shoulder nudge like a poke in the face kind of person
do you just moon someone get your ass cheeks close enough to them until they
wake up in real life yes but in this game no okay fair enough um okay glim you wake up
roll me percentile dice please 82
and then a just read a piece of that by accident constitution savings okay
oh i don't know that's a three oh god
um you get up and you're you kind of you're you're pacing around you're really tired
when you wake up um weren't quite ready to get up and you you sit down in a chair and
kind of catch yourself your head kind of drops and then you find yourself
and your pants are on your arms and over your head and your shirt is on your legs your socks
and boots are laced up on your hands and a stuffed horse's head is crudely attached
by stringing onto your underwear and back side
and for a second you're not quite sure but you get this terrible feeling and something
feeling and something unspeakable and foul is inside the stuffed head you look down and just
before you figure out what it is you snap awake to hillup being like hey hey you you fell asleep
oh oh my oh i had the oh i had the craziest dream and i'm like touching myself to make sure
i guess i don't have a horse's head tied to my butt i don't see any no there's no horse's
head there my shoes are where they're supposed to be and yeah oh okay okay you're tripping balls
on that meat sweats there i don't know maybe maybe that's it oh i don't know okay well you
slept through your your watch i think it is sully's turn now i'm going to go wake him up
gently sully sully it's time to wake up it's time to wake up in the morning yeah hold on a second
if you're talking to me why don't you do the fucking shift no you're already awake no see
it's your turn you took three z's
fine you're like like he gets up like head last if at all possible like he's laying down and
like sits up and like drags his head along and then like snaps it up and he's like yeah okay
it's fine as soon as you're up and out of bed hillup kind of crawls in behind you it's like
oh this is that warm spot it's very cozy in here yes because they fart a lot well that is
okay i was sleeping in the corner on the cold cold stone was because you actually have a place
to stay hillup i'm not even sure why you're here you said we needed to sleep in the same
room so we were all safe good night yes sweet dreams my prince oh god everybody else is asleep
roll me a percentile dice and followed by a constitution saving throw obviously 50
uh nope no oh that's yeah yeah well my zeros five and a five yeah is zero that's five okay
105 just five
105 yeah i'm an overachiever and a constitution saving throw please you got it boss
13 okay what are you doing
uh pacing i guess i'm probably looking through people's stuff actually that sounds right any
bags or satchels that's been left piled around uh okay uh you hear as you're doing
this you hear um feet shuffling outside the door
i go to the door and i listen as you get to the door you listen you don't you don't hear
them once you get to the door i don't pay too much attention to it there are other people
staying in this temple so it could be someone shuffling off to the bathroom
just truffle shuffling their way to the bathroom
after a few moments you hear the shuffling again at the door
i go and i slowly oh no i don't i go i pick up one of my daggers and then i slowly open the
door uh tom and carla take off your headphones for a moment please
you open the door you think you see a shadow dip down the hall quickly oh yeah you think
you'd get away from me a fucking shadow man i pursue you run down the hall um run or you're
going stealthily i'm stealthy yeah make a stealth check
well that's a 19 plus like i don't know a million you're you're like the knight you're moving
quick um you get around a corner and you see a figure you get around a corner down followed
it goes down the stairs and this figure is in the kitchen and uh it's kind of bent over
the table like leaned over the table not a figure you recognize
but like corporeal yeah like he's a solid guy um similar size to you so not very tall but yeah
what's cooking good looking
the figure straightens up
and takes a step back and turns around and you are staring into a mirror
well i wasn't wrong with the good-looking pot
when you are hit from behind and knocked unconscious
you fall to the ground and then the next thing you know you wake up at the end of your watch
um
welcome to the middle we're here yeah to tell you that you can win a book or a shirt a really cool
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they have until to do that thank you for asking this very important question carla we've
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welcome to facing fate an anthological audio fiction actual play podcast
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and you get to the end of your watch and i mean it was late at night i'm assuming four hour
watches it's probably morning time now so the three others hillip glim and moot you begin to
wake with kind of the morning light coming through the window when sully is seated there
finishing up his watch
anything happen on anybody's shift mine was pretty pretty snooze fest
did you literally fall asleep no i was awake the whole time just nothing happened
i have a confession to me oh i did fall and you don't have oh you don't have i fell i fell
asleep i have to be honest we could have kept it a secret between friends i did fall asleep
i had a crazy dream um what happened in your dream can you imagine what hillip could have done
to us in our sleep if if he was the only one awake i mean i think he was the only one awake
because i fell asleep that's what i'm saying i was awake when when you were sleeping but i
also trust hillip i don't think he did anything i don't think anything happened i think everything's
fine but i did have a crazy dream and my clothes were on all weird and there was a
horse head tied to my butt and i don't know you know dreams they don't really make sense
she was stripping balls on the meat sweats i figure that's fucked up man yeah yeah that'll do it
it sometimes happens you see and hallucinate crazy different things
anyways so everybody's all good then yeah i'm good yeah yeah nothing happened i sat here
stared at you assholes while you're sleeping you stared at the assholes well if you didn't
sleep just spread eagle it's the most comfortable that way yeah i'm gonna have to burn that bed
you should at least have pants on i did at first so they're like spring loaded when i sleep
oh god that's not the only thing too man you mean you gotta get that under control you're
sleeping in a whole room full of people anyway who's who wants breakfast yeah anything to end
this conversation i don't know how we got you but it's just happened i will put my pants back on
that's fine we yeah i thought that that was maybe yeah yeah i mean we're in a temple and
we're gonna go get breakfast so it would be yeah i'm sorry even if we were not in a temple
about to eat like dinner you should sell your pants on me true i mean if you were in your
own home alone you can and should do whatever you want sure yeah sorry i didn't i didn't mean
to it just you sleep you you you fall into the routine of usual things of spring-loaded pants
i mean spring-loaded pants is the sounds that they sometimes make i get yeah okay so breakfast
sounds good sounds tasty okay uh you unless you say otherwise you'd probably head downstairs
to the kitchen i would assume yeah um who's cooking up what are you doing guys
chef sally's in the house oh see i was picturing that like at the temple there was probably
one of the people that just made like i don't know oatmeal or like some very simple plain
temple food but i like this chef sully ideas yeah i want to see where chef sully takes us
i'm gonna ransack this motherfucking place i'm finding eggs like i'm finding herbs i'm finding
all kinds of stuff and i'm making omelets the omelets did we should i go get some baguettes
for the omelets ah yeah man nothing's better than crusty bread with eggs get at it okay i shall be
right back i think that's the nicest way i've ever told him to get lost i think you're right
it's been a while it's i feel like we're coming due
so sully starts to cook and you know he's getting creative with the ingredients he is
he's dipping into his satchel a little bit pulling some special special ingredients for
everybody oh sprinkle here dash here sauteing kind of showing off his skills a little bit
chopping but not looking at what he's chopping like looking at you guys you know is he doing
that thing where he like flicks the pan with his wrist and causes everything to like absolutely
he's got a pan full of mushrooms and he's like he throws a clove of garlic crushed up in there
he's getting a little weird with he's like you like that yeah you like that sizzle he does
a little shimmy when he says sizzle sully you've had so many different jobs and you're
so skilled at this i assume you must have been a cook or a chef or oh absolutely i was
a foodatier oh and is that like a cook or a chef well foodatier is just like it's like a
step above a chef really because i mean you have to know all about the food and where the
food is grown and if the food is good and you know things like that so um that's how i
know how to get the freshest ingredients and um and how to saute like a motherfucking wizard
oh i mean you are it looks so good and it smells incredible i can't wait to eat
i um finish up the omelets and i and i serve them up should we wait for hillip i mean cold
eggs aren't good we should just go ahead right oh yeah god no nobody likes cold eggs
uh hillip runs back in he looks like he's been through a whirlwind of a fight and he's got like
four baguettes just everywhere shirts untucked whoa i'm back what uh what happened this is a
very quick run i had to fight off several older ladies who were also there for the baguettes
i said did you not let them have any of the baguettes well i needed one for each of my my
pally pals and the old third ladies say they didn't want to wait for the next batch so
i had to pay a premium and also steal one hence the running oh um oh well it's gonna
break your heart i'm not gonna eat a whole fucking loaf of bread that's excessive man
yeah moot has learned a valuable lesson about carb intake since his time in the towns
so what you're saying is is one loaf probably would have suffice yeah maybe
maybe two maximum you didn't need to get four uh here is one loaf i have some apologies to
make i shall return in a moment do you do you want to eat some eggs for the road or
yeah i mean eat your eggs before you go no i it's really probably very important that i go apologize
to mrs rubenstein
because she's she probably might not walk the same again oh boy hillop i shall return
and he leaves with three baguettes oh boy it takes his bread seriously that one
yeah he really does it's bread and his meat i'd hate to see how he is about cheese maybe we'll
find out all right everybody's digging in yeah everybody roll a d20 see how well sully cooked
just you roll a d20 too i roll a d20 15 six
six four this isn't my best work moot you're you kind of filtered through it and you see an
interesting ingredient in there it looks familiar to you you can't quite place it
but it's not one that is regularly available at least through your omelet purchasing
since you've been in waterty but it looks familiar to me yeah well yeah something about it looks
familiar you can't quite put your finger on it sully what uh what's what's what's this
and i've got it on my fork oh dad that's only the freshest ingredients no but like what is it
no but like what is it
well you know it's like uh like a like a you know it's like one of the the flavor like
it's like one of like the flavor makers
she said it's so gross yeah it doesn't sound great it doesn't but i'm gonna call every
ingredient i'm i put in food now flavor maker well i mean i i recognize pretty much everything
else in here but this one i don't i don't know what this one is and i've had some food allergy
issues in the past so i'm just gonna i'm gonna put this one to the side well i was
getting saying lean you don't know if you're gonna be allergic to it until you put it in
your mouth yeah that's not usually how i like to find that out i just i just don't i think
you should just try it i just i know it just doesn't look too good to me but it's so good
what's glim doing no just eating just eating observing this conversation it's very likes
it yeah it's very delicious glim you liking it it's it's great i love it when people cook for
me thank you oh you're welcome i mean i appreciate it too i just you hurt my feelings
i'm sorry is sully also eating because it'd be weird
he's not what if i chopped it up into smaller pieces sully make a persuasion
oh dang that's only a 12 versus moot's insight
oh nat 20 fuck
fuck um moot you get the feeling that sully isn't sully's hiding something
and it has to do with whatever this ingredient is that you're
not suspicious of but you're you're curious about yeah i just i just wish i knew actually
what it was it's a lot easier to make an informed decision when you know these things
all right it's called jiggledote
and it's an ancient ingredient of my halfling people it's like a mixture between a fern shoot
and a water pond reed it's chewy and it absorbs the flavors while also being a flavor maker
it has two roles in food as the door opens back up and hillup comes in even more disheveled
hair everywhere well guys i gave the baguettes back to mrs rubenstein and she was not happy
with sir hillip here you're missing a big chunk of hair off the left side
oh yeah i think it will grow back at the at a certain time maybe when your mustache
grows back too oh so it's almost there right did you make did you make some breakfast so
that we could share this one single baguette not to each have our own baguettes yes these eggs are
delicious but um i'm so curious like can i just see the thing with i want to i'm so curious now
i don't think you have to pick it apart if like let's just say you're gonna eat cake but
all you see is like the dry flour and then the raw eggs and then all that stuff and you're
gonna think it's gross well i wouldn't call those things a cake what is the problem here
we are just having breakfast all of us friends so did you make something yucky
no man it's good here you go no they're delicious eggs did you make it just the way i
like it yeah great that's cool all right he takes a bite see he'll believe it again people
are more than welcome to it i just it's just not for me okay okay i'm gonna stop pushing i'm
sorry mood i can see this is a sore subject for you so it's it's all right don't don't eat my
special ingredient i mean my eggs must be gone by now i've just been eating this whole time
so i don't know what they're arguing about you have made it's very very very nice and
very good make a perception check
that is a 16 you kind of glance down at hillops plate and
you could be mistaken because he's eating it kind of quickly but you don't see that ingredient
on his plate i don't know what to do with this information russ
okay that's almost just like spit cake to that that's what these covers are for right
the spray of beer that might come out of your mouth when my nose is where it almost came out
oh yes uh yeah so i just kind of make a mental note of like didn't see any of these on
hillops plate as i've pushed mine off to the side by the way when you do that you look like
a child that's okay so why did you push the the things over there off to the plate are you
allergic to those things uh well i do have some food allergy issues oh okay that seems fair
it seems fair right if he has allergy we don't want to kill our friends with the food that
we create heck no but i'm just saying how you know you have an allergy i thought i
could have killed you each with a baguette hole in your tummy it would have expanded and exploded
and it could have been very bad which is why i gave some back to mrs rubenstein
it was very kind of you to return them thank you for saying so i might make some tea before
we before we head out on whatever we need to be doing which i'm sure is something
about a three-eyed ghost guy so is anyone wanting tea uh yeah i would have some tea sure
yeah tea uh i'm okay i'm quite full okay i brought up some mint tea it's on the other
end of the kitchen the three of you are sitting around the table so there was a bit of a
kerfuffle when i came back in are you are you okay you were solid was there like an argument
of some sort no he just i mean he went through all the effort of making this
this omelet for everyone and then i didn't want to eat part of it i think just think
he took it personally it wasn't anything personal okay well that's fair and you enjoyed
your omelet i i liked my omelet i mean there was i don't know that i could have identified
everything in it i was pretty hungry i just ate it but the sully cooked the foods very
often it was the first time i've really seen him go to at least for breakfast yeah but
he did used to be a food at here so right that's true here yeah so i mean it's
he has experience with it called the three food of tears go around oh there's four of us though
yeah so well there was actually four of those guys too right good call good call with the
we are the three four food of tears the three four two tears look at that's combining words
and making fun sully comes back over with the tea i don't know if there's travel mugs but there
are now uh there's like like i don't know like a water skin but you know thicker so that you
don't burn yourself there's like fur on the outside and it keeps beverages warm yeah absolutely
so i hand those out all right it's mint tea it's a little hot it's actually going to be
perfect for you know the mixture of the bread and the eggs and all that stuff just
means real good for settling your stomach afterwards you know that is super cool all
right i know a lot about herbs i used to be an herbalist oh that is an actual thing what a
change wow it's a job that he actually might have had now we don't really know that's right
i would make lists of all of the herbs you are and i would give them to different people with
different reasons to use them you are what they call a mystery wrapped inside of an enigma
wrapped inside of something else that is kind of rude to talk about somebody's enigma
i mean you were talking about my enigma well it was on display it sounds like
sorry i get it it was graphic don't know where to go with that
all right where are we too everybody i made breakfast i can't be expected to also make a
plan you guys well what do we want to do do we want to try and find ken i mean that
seemed to kind of kind of dry up dead dry dry up like a little husk get it guys
get it dried up like his little husk that fell off his little tiny body yes sorry i got
confused when you were talking about the the joke you were making with then he screamed ken's
dead yeah yeah it seemed like an inappropriate time to make a joke but i didn't know what
things were gonna get so serious right at that moment so do you get okay i'd like your level
of inappropriateness glim do you do you give up on ken you seem so um like he was the other
half of your whole attached at the hip that was that's funny because he was very close to
that part you guys are funny today um yeah no i don't know you know it's just like
you know i just don't even know is it even worth it i'm fine nothing that comes out of me
can be bad i'm uh i mean okay okay sure so so we're not looking for the kin what i mean
if we stumble across i'm sure all right well you let us know if you get a feeling or you
miss him and you want to you let us know because okay it's your he's your lump so
well what about hillops lump yeah we have not found my lump yet but we figured that ken and
barry were together and they were having a good time i mean you have to think the two lumps would
meet up i mean who else do they know i don't know if all lumps know each other i feel like
maybe you're being really presumptuous maybe that's sorry that's my bad you know what
they say about presumpting what do they say about presumpting don't do it's rude
oh that is what they say yeah very popular saying here uh well if we're not gonna try
to track down the lumps maybe we should look into these demon gates oh yeah tell me about
the demon gates well i don't know about them that's why i said we should look into them
oh yeah no fair enough fair enough maybe like a library or maybe someone here at the at the
temple knows glim yeah i mean we can ask the head priestess here she might know
uh you head downstairs and uh she's busy kind of just tidying up in the uh in the main
temple room she sees you come down and says oh uh good good sleep everybody
well i mean i had a very strange dream but generally
yes i think so good good uh sully i heard you walking around last night was everything okay
oh yeah everything was fine good just you know thought i heard something
oh late got a little scared i i understand i understand well just know we
not nobody really comes to try and break into the temple so you should you should be okay
you should be safe here i know it's just weird stuff's been happening man
do tell do tell me well what has been happening that is weird i mean a few things
i mean solly had a lump that came out of his body and then seemed to gain sentience and
was alive and we were following it and then same night we saw a ghostly three-eyed boy
in a graveyard and he said something very cryptic and scary about the demon gates opening
and our destiny calling and something about orcas
do you know anything about any of those things um well i do do hope that that is
like one of your bad dreams uh no this this was not a dream that one happened
that one happened yeah he sounds fucked up it does it does sound like that is not good
um well orcas as you know is the uh is the demon lord of the undead uh and uh really
wants nothing more than to um rid the world of pain and suffering i guess you could say
yeah that doesn't sound so bad hot jinx he got me solly wait for it he wants to rid the world of
pain and suffering by making everyone undead that sounds less good well i mean don't think about
it if everybody is undead would you even know right i mean the transition period is more the
concern and once he is in power that gives him a lot of power to move between planes and worlds
and i mean that doesn't sound great i don't think we want you know demon demon lord just
being in control of all of us seems very bad yeah that's uh that's not great yes it seems
like the the the world has just gotten past something world ending yes
i i have not heard of any demon gates opening and i hope that they aren't is there like a
location like demon gate on the corner fifth and sycamore no no um demons aren't supposed
to be able to to come into the material plane without some sort of
portal some sort of gateway opening but those gateways don't just exist not like
not like those of the the fae or the shadow fell which are directly connected to us
us the abyss and a furnace the nine hells are a little more disconnected in a sense
there are ways in but there are few and far between and if demon gates are opening
and that is what has been presented to you
you that could spell disaster for everyone
disaster is a middle name
so
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