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previously on Dumbgeons and Dragons
of Zone of Truth.
Yeah!
I found myself face to face with this man riding the dragon.
I begged for my life and he agreed in exchange
for information on other settlements
and that's where I was going tonight
to meet him and tell him about you showing up.
Where could they be?
GAlydindin comes forward and says,
"'Yeah, yeah, dude, there's probably a couple
of waterfalls in that direction.'"
I want to go now.
Perhaps we wait until morning.
You guys all head to bed?
Flint, starting on your chest,
something you didn't notice to this point is dragon scales.
You feel like you're looking through somebody else's eyes
and Borg begins talking through you.
I think we are becoming what's known as one.
What do you mean by one?
If they're not taken care of in time,
the host disappears.
How am I going to tell the group about this?
Maybe, yeah, task at hand
and then kind of put it next on the list.
All right, we start off in the direction
in which he had told us.
The waterfall is about 30 miles.
Help!
You come upon this woman on the ground
and she has her leg trapped underneath a tree.
Let's all get in there.
Let's all go try and move this tree.
Heroes at last.
And the woman picks flowers from her hair
and then twists her fingers to weave them into garland
as she lays a garland around each of your necks.
You begin to hear the waterfall off in the distance.
You notice that there are thin spider web
and you look up into the trees
and you see what looks like seven giant spiders
and jumping down behind you, three Ettercaps.
Welcome to Dumbgeons and Dragons.
We are a fifth edition actual play podcast.
I am your dungeon master, Russ More
and with me today is Karla Johnson.
Yay, first out of the gate.
I'm Karla, I play new Laura Moonbrook.
And Tom Laird.
Second place is the first loser, damn it.
Yeah, I'm Tom, I play Flynn Firebeard.
I like these sayings.
Okay, Amy, go.
I'm Amy More, I play Thea Amastasia
and Fridge versus Human.
Fridge will win every time.
I wanna hear the story.
We have not heard it yet.
This is anticipation.
It's not an epic tale.
I've been on the edge of my seat this whole time.
I'm sorry, the anticipation has been up there
but it's not an epic tale.
Russ was putting beer into the fridge.
I was also putting things into the fridge.
He lifted a beer case over my head
or what I thought was over my head
at the same time as I was getting up
and I was like, I'm gonna move out of his way.
And as I stood up really quickly for some reason,
I hit my head on the handle of the freezer.
Oh God.
I hit my head really hard and I was like,
I'm gonna throw up and I felt really dizzy
but we had things to do.
We were going to Russ's sister's.
So I go into the bathroom to do my hair
and I'm straightening my hair
and I part my hair and I go out
and then I look and it's all bloody.
The fridge took a chunk out of my head.
Oh my God.
I've been like off and on like dizzy
and kind of not feeling the best
and I think I jarred my body really hard too
and now I just have like aches just all over.
So fridge versus human.
Fridge wins every time.
I'm sorry, Amy.
I'm sorry to hear that.
And now my headset, my headphones hurt
where they rest on my head
so I'll be constantly adjusting them.
So good.
So how are you guys doing?
Yeah.
Not concussed.
Not concussed.
Yeah, totally fine.
Good.
Just me then.
So Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast.
We've got a great community going on over there
and we're on our way to our second goal
which you can help us reach.
Whoa.
What's our second goal?
When we reach a hundred dollars a month,
we give away either Xanathar's Guide
and Mordenkainen's Tome of Foes
which is the new book coming out
or you can get Rise of Tiamat
and the Hoard of the Dragon Queen adventure modules.
The ones we are playing through right now.
Very cool.
But if you win and you get those,
no spoilies, please.
Yes.
I'm gonna say.
I don't wanna get any Facebook messages
of people being like.
Do this.
Hey, dumb dumb.
This is what you're supposed to do.
You guys have been so bad at this.
Hey, dumb dumb.
Like we know, we're not that good at it.
We're having fun though, God.
We should say that in game in anger.
Everyone we're trying to help in favor.
We're just playing a game here.
We're just having some fun.
Just messing around, it's fine.
The end of the world is a game to you.
That's what really matters, right?
Whether we win or lose,
just that everyone has fun on.
Yeah.
That and the orange slices at halftime.
Yes.
Exactly.
Yeah.
Didn't play youth soccer, Russ, come on.
No.
Sports.
Those are very emphatic, no.
Impressive.
Yep.
Sports are on this side.
Yeah.
Music and role playing is on this side.
Well, Amy, where is our sports podcast
that you're hosting?
Don't do that.
I wouldn't be good at that either.
I mean, I'm bad at this one too.
Heck, if I can do a sports podcast.
Carla's idea, you have to do it together.
Ah.
It would be me and Carla going,
a lot of sports thing is happening right now.
They're sports thing really well.
And now we throw to our guest, Tom,
who actually knows something about sports.
Tom, go.
Who actually knows quite a bit about sports.
Sports Corner, all right.
Yeah.
Sporner, no.
Or Sporner.
Sports.
So.
All right.
I like that second one better.
So if you join us on Patreon,
we won't have Sports Corner.
We promise.
But we do have a Gook Hang
on the fourth Tuesday of every month.
Yeah.
I love Tuesdays.
We can talk about sports on that Gook Hang.
Like up to date.
Oh, that's true.
Up to date sports scores.
And.
Absolutely.
Statistics.
And then there's the bonus episodes,
the dungeon side scrollers.
We're going through a sweet adventure
DM'd by Tom Laird.
Which is.
Oh, hey, that's me.
Pretty, pretty, pretty good.
It's real fun.
It's hilarious.
It's real fun.
So you wanna go check that out.
And that's really all I got.
So fuck it.
Let's play some D&D.
Yeah.
Yay.
Which there's a design for a T-shirt
in the works for that.
Coming soon.
I want that T-shirt.
Soon.
I wouldn't feel like I could wear it out.
Oh, like I need Addy up from school.
Yeah.
I assume it'll have like an asterisk
or like a thing, right?
Yeah.
That's how I want it to be some sort of.
The profanity will be like the big F
and then like the at symbol or whatever.
Yeah.
But yeah.
So we'll figure out what that looks like.
Coming soon.
So you guys find yourselves in the middle
of a whole bunch of spider's webs.
From what you assume,
you can hear the waterfall off in the distance.
You think you're, I don't know.
You're a little bit away.
So you're within earshot of the waterfall.
So we'll just say that.
And you're surrounded now by three Ettercaps
and seven giant spiders.
Yay.
Roll for initiative.
Woo hoo.
16.
Six.
14.
Oh wait, 15.
Cause of my bonus.
I was wrong.
Six.
Is the, all right.
Flint, you're playing Thaddeus.
Oh, right.
Yep.
And who's playing Flammokins?
Russ?
I'll play Flammokins.
Well, I can play Flammokins.
We can talk about what you guys do.
12.
10 for Thaddeus.
Spiders get to go first.
So they drop down a ways from the canopy of the forest.
They are going to shoot their web down.
Each of you get shot at by one of the spiders.
So that's one, two, three, four, five.
So we'll go down initiative order here.
Nularaaaa, that is going to be a 12.
Against AC?
Against your, yeah, attack to hit.
It's a ranged weapon attack.
So that's against your AC.
Okay.
That does not hit.
I thought you were telling me 12 damage for a second.
I was like, come on.
I haven't even done anything yet.
No, no.
You missed.
And you're not allowed to.
Flint, that's a 21.
Do I have any resistance to web-based attacks?
I don't know.
You picked your feats.
Did you go web-based on this one there, spider boy?
Pretty sure it did.
Nope, nope.
Okay, so you are restrained by webbing.
As an action on your turn,
the restrained target can make a DC strength check,
bursting the webbing on a success.
The webbing can also be attacked and destroyed.
But it's immune to psychic damage, just so you know.
Okay, I'll keep that in mind.
For all my psychic attacks.
Flamikins Kins is a 17.
Oh yeah, that hits her.
All right, she is also restrained.
Thaddeus is a 20.
Yep. Jesus.
He is also restrained.
Thea is a 13.
Not good enough.
Not good enough, even without your shield.
And then there are two more that will attack Nulara
for a 21 and Thea for a seven.
Well, it's all fucking you, Thea, so.
So Nulara is also restrained.
I got you guys.
So that's all the spiders.
And that's all they get to do right now.
So Nulara, it's your turn.
That's all.
Okay, so I'm restrained and, sorry, on my turn.
I have to.
As an action, the restrained target
can make a DC strength check, a DC 12 strength check.
Strength check, okay.
That is a 12.
So you burst from the webbing
and you're not restrained anymore.
Great.
I guess that is my movement or?
No, that's one of your attack actions.
Okay, great.
Remember how I already had my sword out and on fire
because we were like burning the.
We were burning the.
Because we were not into the things.
Okay, perfect.
So I will take my second attack.
And so are they still a ways away?
The spiders are right above you.
They're out of reach, but.
Okay, and then what about them Ettercaps?
They're coming at you from where you were coming
and they're within 15 feet closing in on you.
Okay, okay.
So that's obviously within my movement.
So I guess I'll attack one of those.
Okay.
So that is a 23.
Against the Ettercaps.
Oh yeah, 23.
Okay, that's 17 damage.
Nice.
I guess that's my second attack,
but Donny maybe will fly up
and try and like chomp on one of them Spideys.
Sure.
Oh my God.
Oh my God, you guys.
Let me just like, he definitely chomped it.
It's been so long since Donny actually hit anything.
I can't remember what his plus is to his attack roll,
but Donny got a 21.
Whoa, Donny.
Donny.
Does that hit the Spidey?
Yep.
It's amazing.
Get ready for not very much damage.
Sorry, he's just a little guy.
Five damage.
And he has to do a con saving throw.
Sure does.
Come on Donny, put this giant ass spider to sleep.
This will be the best thing.
It's a five.
11 savings throw five or more.
The target falls unconscious for one hour.
Nice.
Yeah.
Now we need two guys to come and pick it up
and like gently place it or like fluff it
like a blanket.
Like a small child.
Like a toddler.
Honestly, I don't remember if this has ever
actually happened before.
Maybe once before he put someone to sleep.
So it is similar to the sleep spell
I think in our other game where he's unconscious,
he's been poisoned, but if someone shakes him awake,
he will wake up.
So he's not like in a coma or anything.
Or does like physical damage to him.
Yes, yes.
So Donny right now, like, I don't know,
has a boner.
He's so excited.
Like how did this happen?
Donny's like fucking moonwalking all over the place.
Seriously, like that is a giant, giant spider.
It's amazing.
I'm very proud of him.
Way to go Donny.
All right, sorry, I'm just trying to find
hit points here.
It's okay, I was just talking about Donny's boner.
It probably wasn't flying.
It was great.
You are really missing a lot there.
Flint, you're up.
All right.
You are restrained.
Okay, I guess I should roll to see
if I can get out of that first off.
Yep.
That is a 19 plus all my bonuses.
So I think I'm good.
You bust free from said webbing.
She wants to break free.
Can you let me know like what's in front of me Russ?
Yep.
Your friends?
Like where are all these spiders?
Are they above us?
Spiders are in the trees.
Except that one that fell down.
Except that one that is now sleeping on the ground.
Nobody's at it.
Or unconscious rather, not sleeping.
Leave it alone.
Leave it alone.
So you got three other caps.
Put a giant glass over top of it.
Flint, you were in front.
So you are the farthest from them.
But you can still make it there.
They're, yeah, you're probably about 30 feet out.
Okay, and the guys above us in the trees,
how many of them are there?
Six up in the trees, one unconscious on the ground.
And are any of them within like five feet
of the other ones?
And how high up in the trees are they?
They're probably about 15 feet above you.
Okay, perfect.
And any like clumped together?
No, they're pretty well spread out.
What are you looking for?
What do you want to do here?
I know, I can't wait.
Well, I'm thinking it's what time I-
What kind of vertical leap does Flint have?
I use that lightning breath.
That's just sitting in my chest waiting to be let out.
Oh yeah, remember you can do that?
It's been a long time since the lightning breath.
What's the, what's the, the cone or range
or whatever on that one?
The lightning is five by 30 foot line.
So that's why I asked if any of them are within
like five feet of one another.
You could hit possibly three of them
shooting up and straight into the trees there.
Well, let's do that then.
Okay.
The save you have to make Russ is a 15
and it's a dex save.
Dex on my spiders.
Dex on the spiders.
I haven't been there before.
Dex three.
So the one, two, three.
So that's eight, 17, 16.
So- Okay, so two of them save.
On the fail is three D six
and the other ones are half of that.
Okay.
I'm crying, trying not to laugh at Tom's.
Four, three, seven and six is 13.
And I guess that's my second attack.
So I will just chill there.
Well, maybe I'll move in front of everyone
but not all the way to the Ettercaps.
So Nularaaa is engaged in combat with the Ettercaps.
Oh, all right.
Yeah.
Then I'll just go a little closer
but not all the way there.
Okay.
Got it.
Flamikins, you're up.
Well, let's just fucking do it.
Light them up.
All right.
So Flamikins.
You just tell me what Flamikins does
and I'll act it out for you.
Yes, yes.
Okay.
This reminds me of a time when it was on a ship.
And there was not spiders specifically,
but it was rats.
But there was that super cool dice game
that everybody understood.
Oh man, we had just finished playing.
They didn't even let us finish the dice game.
I mean, it was like one of those,
it went on for like six days,
one of those kind of dice games.
Yeah.
Okay.
She's going to use infestation.
It's an instantaneous attack
where a cloud of mites, fleas and other parasites
appear around a spider that I choose in the air.
I don't care which one they're all kind of up there
except for the one that's on the ground, right?
Yeah.
And so they must succeed on a constitution saving throw
or it takes two D six poison damage
and moves five feet in a random direction.
Okay.
And I choose that by rolling a D four.
Yep.
So constitution.
That's a five.
Okay, well the damage is only four
and I roll a D four.
So north it goes higher, let's say.
South it drops lower.
Okay.
And then east and west.
So. Sure.
North is one, south is two,
east is three, west is four.
East, so it moves five feet eastward.
That spider is over here.
A little bit to the other.
Just a little bit, just shifts over.
It makes a scurrying noise as Flammican screams out.
Take that, bugs, take those bugs, bugs.
Bug bitch.
The old bug bitch.
Bug bitch, fuckers.
Oh wait, hold on, sorry, pause.
I'm allowed to use fury of the small
with an attack or a spell.
And the creature size is larger than yours,
which I'm assuming giant spiders are.
They are large beasts.
So I'm a small creature.
The damage equals your level,
the extra damage equals your level.
So plus 10 damage.
Nice.
Ha ha.
Okay.
Okay, yeah, what do you got there, Thaddeus?
Oh, he should probably roll
to see if he can get out of those spider webs though.
If you want, I mean, he is restrained.
Oh, well, I guess it doesn't matter.
I'm not going anywhere.
Do you want me to tell you what restraint does?
Does it make me more like susceptible to hits?
Yeah, attack rolls have advantage and moves.
Oh, crit 20.
Okay, so yeah, you're out.
Yeah, is the Ettercap that Nulara is fighting
like do I have a clear line of sight?
Nulara is a little bit in front of Thaddeus
and the Ettercap,
but there is a clear line of sight to another Ettercap.
Okay, let's go for the other Ettercap then.
I'm going to use my cantrip of fire bolt.
Okay.
And I'm going to hurl some fire at him.
And since I'm a level 10 character,
oh no, it's level five that I get the bonus
and level 11.
Well, it's a 2d10 anyway.
Yeah.
So that's a 17 and six, so that's 23.
Yep, that'll hit.
All right, get ready for 2d10 damage.
Nine and 10.
Damn, good rolls.
Thaddeus.
Is Thaddeus moving anywhere or is he dead?
No, he's going to stay stationary right there.
The you're up.
You're going to love this.
Yeah.
I like that grand Amy.
I'm excited.
Thea is going to cast conjure animal
and she is going to conjure eight wolves.
Oh my God.
Hold on.
That's a lot of wolves.
It is a lot of wolves.
Oh, okay, yeah, yeah.
Because my wolves are medium beasts.
They're only a challenge rating of.
You got to keep track of all eight of your wolves.
I need a pencil and a paper.
Didn't plan this one out, did you?
I'm not keeping track of eight wolves.
Can I ask you a personal question?
It's a personal question of Thea.
Oh, yes.
Did you conjure wolves
because you're hoping Delaine's going to happen along
and be like, oh, she's so wolfy.
She's so. Yes.
Okay.
I'm hoping, you know, it stops by.
So why not just practice being a little bit wolfy,
a little extra wolfy.
Little extra wolfy.
I like it.
I like it, Thea.
Thanks for letting me ask you that personal question.
No problem.
Are you like yelling me that in battle?
Like, Thea, hoping Delaine comes along?
No, be like, shut up, Nulara, shut up.
Just fight.
It'll be like in the Lord of the Rings
when Legolas and Gimli are counting up the orcs
that they're killing.
Instead, she'll just be like,
are you summoning wolves to get a date?
Yep.
Sure am.
Trying, girl, trying.
Ettercaps are going to attack some bitches here.
Ettercap on Nulara.
We're the bitches, I know.
Wait a minute.
Oh, that's not very good.
So that's a seven.
Perfect.
One going for Flint is an 18.
What kind of attack do they make?
Magic.
No, I don't know.
Like, is it a bite?
Is it bludgeoning?
It is using its web garrot.
So it's going to be bludgeoning.
Okay, yeah, 18 will hit.
Yeah, it will.
So you're going to take.
Well, if it was slashing, it wouldn't have hit,
so I had to make sure.
It's true.
You're going to take only three bludgeoning damage,
but.
In the butt.
You are grappled.
In the butt.
In the butt damage.
Usually, Thea gets the butt damage,
so this is good.
Someone else.
Yep.
But you are grappled.
And because you are grappled with a web garrot,
you can't breathe.
Oh, that's fun.
And the Ettercap has advantage
on attack rolls against you.
So the final.
Is it just because it saw my lightning breath
and was like, I gotta shut that shit down?
Makes sense.
Right?
So Thaddeus is also web garrotted,
because that's a 20, not critical.
So Thaddeus is going to take five bludgeoning damage,
and he is also grappled and cannot breathe.
Okay, now how can we solve that situation of breathing?
Well, there is an escape DC.
Okay.
I'm assuming on our turn though?
On your turn, yep.
Okay, yeah.
So Nulara, you're up now.
Back to the top.
Okay.
Then I will continue to attack that Ettercap
that I was attacking.
That was, that is a 30.
Surprisingly doesn't, doesn't hit.
Oh no.
Like I said, it was a magic.
Yeah, yeah.
Just kind of iron man did out there.
Yeah, no, that hits.
Fuck, that hits.
Okay, so that is 12 damage on my first attack.
Yep.
And second attack is a 27.
I'm going to assume that hits five, seven, 11,
13 damage on that one.
Donnie, just like feeling so pleased with himself,
so pleased with himself,
is gonna try and chomp another Spidey.
Do it Donnie.
He's not gonna do it probably,
cause that's a 13.
13 does not hit.
Okay.
Can't win them all buddy.
We believe in you still.
Flint, you're up.
You are grotted, grappled and not breathing
at the hands of an Ettercap.
Like my beard isn't even providing me
some sort of relief from the grot.
It snuck it up underneath the beard.
Oh.
Yeah.
It's impressive attacking.
In real close, real tight.
Okay, so what am I rolling?
Like. Good question.
Strength, con, wisdom?
Please don't say wisdom.
Wisdom, definitely wisdom.
How do I get out of this?
No, you gotta make an escape DC.
Just roll a D20.
Oh, okay.
14.
14, you get out.
Yeah.
So the grapple ends,
you have your breath rush back to you
for holding it for one second.
You're very out of shape.
That was tough, that was tough.
I require a lot of oxygen,
so, well, I'm going to turn around
and swing my axe into this Ettercap.
Several times.
Do it.
It's a crit 20.
Nice.
Doesn't hit, surprisingly.
Ah, man.
These Ettercaps are out of control.
All right, so that's gonna be 4d10 plus,
what's my damage for this, two?
Four?
I have to scroll down, sorry, one sec.
Okay, 4d12 plus four, whew.
Okay, here we go.
33 damage.
Fucking A, dude.
Okay, second attack.
That's a 20, but not critical.
Yeah, that will still hit.
17.
You tell me how you kill this Ettercap.
After my rage-filled first attack
with the criticalness,
I see he's a little worse for wear
and I chop him right in where his hip
and leg meet up and just sever his leg
and the artery that goes with it
and he goes down in a heap.
I will find some blood spurting sound effects.
Excellent, perfect.
Yeah.
I mean, it was good foley work.
Thank you.
If I can't find anything better,
that's what I'll use, but.
Okay.
Okay, you're good there, Flamikins, you're up.
All right.
Let me flip to my page in my book.
Okay, well, she's got all this stuff.
Okay.
She's got a lot of stuff.
She's a sorcerer.
It's just wild.
It comes to her.
It's just like I'm feeling the power.
I love this NPC, by the way.
Oh yeah, she's great.
This reminds me of a time when I was on a ship
and I had my spell choked out.
Yep.
What else happened?
I was ready to go when my turn came up.
Fuck off.
And I murdered the fucking.
I'm gonna acid splash the DM.
Cracking.
I mean.
This is like some excellent meta commentary
from Flamikins.
I hope Amy takes way longer.
This is amazing.
Okay, I'm going to, Flamikins conjures up
a bubble of acid.
Choses one of the spiders, like in the middle.
Because there's a.
One of them right over top of you.
So it splashes down on top of you.
No.
Just checking.
I'm thinking as both an NPC and a DM here.
It's just trying to make sure everybody gets damaged.
Thanks.
Anyway, she throws it up and makes sure
to hit a creature.
To hit a creature within five feet of each other.
She wants to hit two.
She's trying to hit two with this bubble.
Yeah, sure, you can do that.
The target must succeed on a dexterity saving throw
or take 2d6 damage.
This didn't work out well for them last time,
I don't think.
Yeah, but my damage roll was stupid too, so.
Right.
Gotta hit those stupid rolls.
Stupid rolls.
Okay, giant spiders have the.
So you're trying to hit two.
So that's a 21 and a 22.
Okay, fine.
They don't get any damage.
No.
Boo.
It was a good try.
We heard that great song from Flaming Hits,
so it was worth it.
It really was worth it just for that.
Guys, this never happened to me before.
Thaddeus, you are grappled and not breathing
for five, for nearly five seconds at this point.
Super tough.
All right, I should probably roll
to get out of that then.
Yep.
18.
That'll do her.
Excellent.
He shimmies free from the Ettercap's grot.
Perfect.
I'm going to swing my war hammer
into the Ettercap that was strangling me.
Sure.
That is a 23.
Sweet, eight plus two is 10.
Wolves, you're up.
Ooh.
That's what they say.
I'm going to get four of the,
there's two Ettercaps, right?
Ettercaps.
Yep, one in front of Nulara
that looks like it's being beaten up pretty good
and one on Thaddeus, which is less beat up good.
Well, we are going to go,
I'm gonna split the party.
I'm gonna say you four
and I point over to Nulara's Ettercap
and I point you four over to Thaddeus' Ettercap
and the first four,
I'm gonna go to bite because that's what they do.
Okay, so the first one gets an 18.
Yep.
15.
Yep.
16.
Yep.
Two.
Nope.
It was such a drop off.
All right, so then for damage for those.
So is this damage for all three?
We'll see how good it is.
Sure.
Okay, so Ettercap gets four damage.
That's six damage.
Four, five, six, so six damage.
Ooh, plus 10 damage, so 16.
Plus nine damage, so that's 25 damage.
That Ettercap is pulverized, shredded, dead, gone.
They're not eating it,
they're just ripping it apart
because these Ettercaps look gross.
Ettercap everywhere.
All right, how about that second Ettercap?
Second Ettercap.
12 plus four, 16.
Yep.
17 plus four.
12.
Nope.
18.
Yep.
All right, so same stitch.
Even if you roll all ones, it's dead.
Yes!
Ha ha ha ha!
The tear it apart with the ferocity.
So the eight wolves come in
and swarm these two Ettercaps
and just churn out Ettercap meat.
It's just flying everywhere because these are.
They've been put through my wolf grinder.
And I look up to the spiders and I go, you're next.
The spiders see this and flee into the trees and run away.
That makes me feel very gross.
It's a pretty solid plan on their part.
Because I know they're still out there.
I know, it's like when you see
a really, really big spider in your house
and it's like, and then you don't see it,
it's so much worse.
Like you go to get something extra heavy.
To smush it with you.
And then it's gone.
And you know it's still in the house
and like, it's watching me right now.
Well, those university textbooks
have to be good for something.
Yes, they do.
Okay, so you guys,
dispatch of the Ettercaps and the spiders
and you still have a little ways to go.
Well, let's keep going.
My wolves are coming with us.
How long do you get to keep your wolves for?
That is an excellent question.
I get to keep my wolves. Forever.
Forever, they're just part of the-
Forever, they're mine, they're my family.
I get to keep these wolves for up to an hour.
Okay.
Yeah, so you continue burning your way
and slashing your way through the webbing.
After about another hour, you come to-
My wolves go, pfft.
No, I'm kidding, I'm kidding.
It's not an hour.
It only takes you about, I don't know,
15 or 20 minutes to get to the-
Ha ha ha.
Ah, that was funny.
And then you trip and you break some potion or something?
I'm not sure.
Ha ha ha.
Things go real bad for you guys.
That fight went well, but shit.
You break your ring of holding.
You wanted this.
What is it?
Ring of spell.
My spell holding.
Yeah, you broke it, sorry.
It's just a ring of spell.
Yeah, smashed it.
Now that you remembered you have it, it's gone.
No, you come to a large clearing
where there is a lake at the base
of what looks to be an approximately 100 foot waterfall.
It's beautiful, you guys.
It's beautiful, it's majestic.
The surface of said lake is obscured
by an emerald green haze.
And all around there, it looks to be a worn down
kind of pathway of sorts
that goes all the way around
up to where the physical waterfall is.
And it is, I should remind you about the time it is,
it is now just past sunset.
So it is nighttime now.
What do you want to do?
I don't mind fighting at night.
Well, I can't see in the dark,
so I'd prefer not to fight at night.
I also prefer not to scale behind waterfalls in the dark
if that's what we're gonna be doing.
I know that's the lame answer,
like I'm tired, let's have a sleep.
But Nularaaa is not at her,
it has no dark vision or anything, right?
So definitely is not at her best in darkness.
That being said, if you guys are all like keen to go,
we can keep it rolling.
You can camp outside.
She gets first dibs if Delaine shows up though, I'm just saying.
Oh, damn.
Do we, we don't see any like creatures or movement?
There is, seems to be no creatures or movement.
I mean, I know there's a fuck ton of spiders
in the woods, but-
Yeah, you know, aside from the spiders that you hear
just their eyes glaring at you from, yeah.
Just, no, what is it?
Skittling around.
Skittling around, lots of skittling.
But yeah, if you guys wanna go, like, I don't know,
convince me.
I don't wanna make you do anything you don't wanna do.
Well, no, but we can wait.
It would give, it would give Delaine extra time
to hopefully catch up
because having one more person fighting with us
if we do happen to find this dragon.
We are going to fight a dragon, that's true.
I mean, the dragon does take off at nighttime though,
correct?
True.
Yeah, it could just see us out here in the clearing.
And I don't wanna go back in there with those spiders.
That's all I gotta say.
I assume we are going to be sneaky.
Hold on, I feel like I have some sort of skill
where I'm good at-
It's called pass without trace.
No, it's not that.
It's something else that I got that is,
um, yeah.
I have a skill called hide in plain sight,
so I am good at camouflaging.
Yeah, so what-
I don't.
How I picture hide in plain sight works
is mid conversation, every once in a while,
Nulara just fucking disappears.
No one knows where she went.
She was just tired of people at that moment
and was just like, no, I just-
Ghosts into the background.
But it gives a plus 10 to Dex
if I don't take an action.
It's just camouflaging basically, right?
Like I could spend a minute using the things around
to hide the things.
So in theory, we could probably have a low key camp.
And in fact, saying that the dragon escapes at night,
we don't actually know that it is behind this waterfall.
It's not a bad idea to chill down here
and see if it flies out.
That's true.
Right?
I just didn't want us to miss our chance.
Me too.
Could one of us go and just check it out,
do a little recon?
You tell me.
Thea would like to go ahead.
Thea's got dark vision.
She could wild shape into something,
fly up behind the waterfall,
see what's going on.
How high up is the entrance?
Is there an entrance behind this waterfall?
I want to say yes,
considering there's like a worn path
behind the waterfall.
But maybe this cavern is lit with braziers
or torches or something.
I like this fly up and do recon thing.
Remember you used to do this all the time?
You were like turning into rats
and sneaking in with it?
Little rats and geckos and stuff.
Yeah, I remember that.
I'm getting back to my roots.
That seems like a good idea.
And then we'll have a better idea, right?
If it looks like, shit, yeah,
and they're all sleeping.
Let's fucking go, right?
Yeah, let's kill them in their sleep.
I like it.
Exactly.
I have no problem with that.
They've been burning villages and murdering, so.
Yeah.
Okay.
Also, I would love to run in,
like if we're able to run in right now,
if it's a good situation,
I'd love to be able to run in with my wolves.
Exactly.
But if it's too high up, who knows?
Yeah.
But you can like suss the path and stuff.
I dig this idea.
Okay, so I do that.
I will.
What's the range on your wolves?
60 feet. 60 feet.
I can get them to come with me
to the base of the waterfall and then I'll fly up.
Okay.
And look in the, if that's.
Sure.
Well, like, well, if that is within range, sure.
If not, I guess I will just have to say goodbye.
Sure, no, they can come up as close to the entrance
as you want them to go.
It is a pack of eight wolves.
And when you're trying to be super sneaky.
Wolves are super stealthy.
I'm gonna make you roll for them
if you're getting them super close.
Plus four to stealth.
Okay, so Thea is going to turn into,
she's going to wild shape, into an owl
because night vision, hello.
Almost silent wings when flying, yes.
Snazzy little mortar board hat, yes please.
Being able to turn my head all around,
constantly asking one question.
Spitting up most pellets.
This is the life.
So I turn into, I think first we just,
I turn into an owl and I send four of my wolves.
How big is this lake?
Cause I would like to send four of my wolves
on one side for it.
Cause I mean, a pack of eight is going to invariably
be a lot more easy to spot than four wolves
slinking along in the darkness.
They're black wolves by the way.
Didn't say it before, but I wanted them
to be extra scary.
So the lake itself is about 150 feet across.
The, it narrows to about 45 feet on either side
of the waterfall though.
Okay, so it kind of comes out.
Is it too far?
Are they going to disappear in the middle?
Well, at one point they're going to be
145 feet away from you.
So yes.
Okay, then all of us will go together.
Rule for stealth ability.
Yeah, so just do one.
Yes, plus four.
So that's 13.
So how close are you going before you turn into an owl?
I turn into an owl immediately.
Okay.
Hey there, I'm your dungeon master, Russ More.
Thank you for joining us for episode 36
of Dumbgeons and Dragons titled Knock Knock Anyone Home,
part one.
Couple quick notes about this episode
because we did a couple things different than usual.
First, Tom, Carla and Amy added new feats
to Flint, Nularaaaa and Thea.
And normally with feats,
feats are different features that characters can get
to have different improvements in different skills.
And in normally in D&D 5E,
you have an option as you move up in levels
to either take an ability score modifier at specific levels
or take a feat.
And this could have happened twice for the characters
but we didn't do that going through.
And knowing that they're going
into some difficult storytelling,
I had them add those two feet options
and then going forward,
they will have the option
at the regular levels like normal.
We will be releasing a public bonus episode
where we talk about this in the future
on our Patreon page.
But right now I have to hold on to it
because we also talk about some elements
that we recorded out of sync with our current story.
So there are spoilers in that content
and I know what's happening over there, geez.
Okay, I just wanna again,
give you the details from our friends
at the Liberty podcast.
You can pick up their newly released
sci-fi post-apocalyptic RPG system,
Liberty after at LibertyEndures.com
or drive through RPG.com.
I've picked up mine already.
It's only 15 bucks.
I had it printed and bound
and I'm looking to play a game now.
It looks like so much fun, honestly.
Liberty after has 150 pages featuring
over 30 new classes and weapons,
dozens of new special abilities,
deities, poisons, enemies
and those sweet misfire charts.
The best part about Liberty though
is you can submit your stories
that you create with their system at your table
to possibly have them immortalized
in the world's official canon.
And you might even find your characters
in future comics, graphic novels or podcasts
that the Liberty team creates.
They have a relatively new podcast.
They have three episodes out by the time this releases
and that podcast is called Liberty Vigilance
which is an actual play audio drama
within their after system.
We talked about it off the top of the episode.
It's amazing.
You should go check that out
and you can find it wherever you download podcasts
and find all the details
about their Liberty after system,
the RPG system at LibertyEndures.com
or drive through RPG.com.
All of our social media links
can be found on our website, dumbdragons.com
and I would especially encourage you
to join us on our new Facebook group.
We always have a great time over there
sharing cool stories and different ideas
about playing RPGs
and what you can get out of it as a game for yourself.
It's small but getting bigger every week.
And there are a ton of amazing people
to chat about the game and the show with right now.
Links for everything mentioned today
can always be found in the description below.
The next episode will be out April 18th
with part two of Knock Knock, anyone home?
You and your pack of wolves go up
and you come right to the edge of the waterfall
and you fly in behind and there is an opening.
Are you going in?
Sorry, so there's an opening.
So it's just waterfall and same level as the ground,
just a cave.
There are no steps up and in.
It's just.
Yeah, it's a bit up and off the ground.
How many feet up?
Steps to get up there?
No, it's a straight cliff, but it's only 15 feet high.
Okay.
Yeah, I fly up and in.
I kind of perch on the edge.
I don't just fly in, I fly up
and like I'm just a little barn owl,
just like, I'm tired and I need to rest
on the edge of this serious cave.
Behind this waterfall.
You land there on the edge and you look
and you see a steep slope that descends down
from the cave behind the waterfall
and it goes and bends around a corner.
Do I see any torches?
Is it just darkness?
There are no torches.
How far in can I go before I get too far
from my wolfies?
Right now you are about 20 feet from them.
So you could go another 40 feet before the spell would.
I go to my max.
I go 35 feet because I want a little buffer.
Yeah, you fly down this slope a little ways
and find a rocky cliff to kind of perch on
and you can see down in that it opens up
into what looks to be a larger area,
but you can't quite see all the way around the corner
without going any further.
And again, no lights.
No torches or anything.
All right, I fly back.
Okay.
Quiet.
Naturally.
So you fly back to your friends
and your wolves follow you.
Yep.
And I just spend the next hour snuggling them
and stuff, like I turn back into a human.
What have we done before when we go into these dark,
like certainly this is not the first time
we have been in a dark place that New Laura can't see in.
I just hold onto somebody.
Yeah.
You usually light up your sword
is what you usually do.
Yes.
It's not really that sneaky though.
I mean, Donnie can see in the dark
and can like talk to me telepathically,
but he also flies, right?
So he isn't really gonna be that helpful.
I think that's what you've kind of done in the past.
I think so too.
But yeah, typically I guess I can just like
light my sword because we're like trapped in a dungeon
or something, it's not like we're trying
to be like super sneaky.
Yeah, someone already knows we're there.
Are you guys just kind of standing
at the edge of the lake or are you tucked away?
Give me your, what's your...
Yeah, I think we were like near the edge of the woods.
Like, you know, we're trying to be sneaky.
We don't like have a fire or anything.
We're just chilling, quietly chilling.
Thea flies back and tells you what she didn't see
more than anything.
And as you guys are kind of discussing of, you know,
how to get Nulara to see,
you hear a padding of feet coming up behind you.
Son of a bitch.
Just kidding, I don't say that out loud.
That was out of character.
It might be Dane and his wolf.
Here's hoping, here's hoping.
Yeah, so you turn around and you do see Laska
come up behind you.
Yeah, Laska, are the wolves still there?
Are they like, are they like playing?
Like, ha, ha, ha, ha, you know, like dogs do.
You know, you know how dogs play.
Yeah, I think, I think they, they, you know,
they're like very well behaved.
They sit and they wag their tail.
I assume Laska is like dominant
because isn't she gigantic?
Isn't she a giant wolf?
Yeah, these wolves are just kind of like.
Yours are just standard.
Think dire wolf.
Yeah, that's what I thought.
Yeah, Laska comes up and says,
we meant to meet you, but we got ambushed
by the dragon and Delaine is in there now.
Oh shit.
In there?
Yes, yes, in there.
I point to the waterfall.
Yes, he's behind the waterfall.
Was he injured when they took him?
Yeah, he was beat up quite a bit
and carried off by the dragon
and the man with the dragon.
Well, that didn't sound like the end of a sentence.
I thought you were about to tell us something
about the man with the dragon
and the man with the dragon.
I was like, I had my pencil points.
Taken off by the dragon.
The man with the dragon tattoo.
With the dragon.
And the man.
What is that?
You're working.
It's a wolf.
It's talking, but it's not gonna have
complete proper sentences.
Okay, that makes sense.
Man and dragon take Delaine.
Wolves know common.
Yeah, but I am speaking very good.
I'm a wolf.
Yeah, he speaks common,
but he just isn't really a good talker.
Common is right.
That's fine.
You mean Academy Award winner common?
Yes, always.
Was it just the dragon and the man
or who else was with them?
Sub question, when did this happen?
This happened about a day ago.
We were doing some recon at some other settlements
and we had come within range of one
that hadn't been attacked yet
and we were ambushed by just the dragon
and a man riding the dragon.
There was no other horde that has been said
to have come along with the dragon.
What kind of attacks did the man use?
Were they magical or?
The man didn't really use any attacks.
The dragon did most of the fighting.
Okay.
You guys want to kill a dragon?
I mean, yeah.
What else did I come along for?
Holy shit.
Flame beacons, just a sec.
I would like Thaddeus have a spell.
Does Thaddeus and Flame beacons have a little more?
Yeah, don't.
I keep forgetting.
Thaddeus has a lot of spells.
What are you looking for?
Something that can make me see in the dark.
Thaddeus might have dark vision.
Oh yeah, and like can him and Flame beacons see in the dark?
Cause I find.
Thaddeus can't, but.
Flame beacons.
He doesn't have any like true sight
or anything to help him see.
Thaddeus has what's called dark vision spell
which he learned from Grancis' book of spells
that he now has equipped.
Oh yeah, there it is.
Oh look at that, magic.
Imagine that.
So yeah, he could cast two of those
and still have one third level spell on himself
and Nularaaaa.
Yeah, he might as well cast those.
Do you want to though?
Like if we're going in
you might want to save those spell slots
to fight the dragon.
Fia makes a very good point
which is that we're going to fight a fucking dragon.
So how much is that sneak attack
really going to benefit us?
Well. Maybe not that much.
If we can do a bunch of things at once
it might benefit us a lot
because you guys still have those like crazy
dragon killing arrows, correct?
I do have some.
So I mean like if we can launch a bunch of shit
all at once.
Is that how it works? That could be real good.
Do we all get a sneak attack?
Well there's no technical sneak attack thing
unless you're a.
A rogue.
A rogue.
So no, like you would have,
you would use stealth to be sneaky getting in there
and you may have like a first go at initiative.
Right.
But it wouldn't, yeah.
Okay, well I guess it's up to Thaddeus
because it's his spell, so.
Laska has the dragon left for the night
because we know that the dragon leaves for the night
and Laska says no, no the dragon hasn't left yet
but he usually pieces out in like about an hour
he checks his watch.
Yeah.
It's a punctual watch.
Yep.
We know there's watches in this universe, right?
Well if there's trains there's gotta be watches.
Because otherwise how does a conductor keep time
in a schedule?
Exactly.
It's true.
Well I don't know, do you guys wanna
like hunker down out of sight for an hour
and hope the dragon leaves
and then like sneak our asses in there
or do you wanna just like go on in?
You know if we wait an hour,
sneak our asses in there, heal Delaine up,
lie and wait, you gotta come back.
Yep, I like this idea.
However, once the dragon leaves,
whatever devastation is caused is on us.
You guys know that he likely leaves at night
to go meet with.
Oh right.
Yeah.
Yeah, he wasn't doing attacks at night, right?
He was just going to meet with Galen.
Oh yeah, but his night.
Oh right, Galen is the lift operator.
He's the pulley man, yeah.
His night's gonna be free though.
Because Galen is not.
True, but he still has to fly there.
It took you guys all day to run there.
So he will be quicker to get there and back,
but yeah, we will still have time.
Then let's wait.
Yeah, I like this plan.
Let's wait, let's have a,
that's not even a short rest.
Let's just rest and go in when the dragon leaves.
So you guys hunker down and hide away
while your wolves disappear.
Yep.
I pet each one of them before they go.
Approximately an hour later,
you hear a loud flapping of wings
and a bellowing roar emit from behind the waterfall
and a large green dragon comes out
bursting from the waterfall,
water spraying everywhere with a dark figure on its back
and it flies off into the night.
Music
Music in today's episode was by Kavin McLeod
of incompetech.filmmusic.io.
Can you show me a picture of an Ettercap?
Yeah, I'd like that too.
Yeah, what is an Ettercap?
While you're doing that,
turn the light on, it's getting dark.
You can literally just show us a picture.
I know, it's like, all right, we have video,
I can do this.
Oh Jesus.
Oh Carla, are you okay?
I think Carla didn't detach herself
from her microphone
but she left her computer.
Guys, I hope it's died.
Carla, are you okay?
She was trying to make Amy feel better
for her concussion.
That's an Ettercap. Oh my God.
Oh, that was amazing.
Well done, Carla.
Are you there?
I am here.
Fury of the Small.
I have that too.
Yeah, it's like-
Just in case you're wondering, just personally.
Like I, Carla Johnson,
like feel that to my soul.
A spell name has never spoken to me so deeply
as Fury of the Small.
Carla's next character will be a goblin.
The smallest character possible.
Dumbgeons and Dragons is a Dumb Dragons production.