1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:06,000 It's okay, you haven't missed it, the ceremony's about to begin, and Dumbgeons and Dragons will begin in just a moment. 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:14,000 Dumbgeons and Dragons is a D&D actual play podcast, and I'm your Dungeon Master, Russ More, HeHim. 3 00:00:14,000 --> 00:00:18,000 Also with me today is Tom Laird as Kavlaran Goldweave, HeHim. 4 00:00:18,000 --> 00:00:22,000 Hey mom, mom, this isn't where you're supposed to be sitting. 5 00:00:22,000 --> 00:00:24,000 Carla Maxted as Lady Marison the First. 6 00:00:24,000 --> 00:00:27,000 You're so sad. Come on, let's go have a drink. 7 00:00:27,000 --> 00:00:29,000 Amy More as Eloin the Second. 8 00:00:29,000 --> 00:00:32,000 So have they done marriage classes? 9 00:00:32,000 --> 00:00:35,000 And Kyle Claset as Baroness Yselle the Third. 10 00:00:35,000 --> 00:00:37,000 Here, let's go wash your hands off. 11 00:00:37,000 --> 00:00:44,000 Dumbgeons and Dragons is a Patreon-supported podcast, and we'd love for you to join us today at patreon.com slash DumbDragonCast. 12 00:00:44,000 --> 00:00:47,000 You'll get a 7-day free trial to check things out. 13 00:00:47,000 --> 00:00:49,000 And now, let's get right to it. 14 00:00:49,000 --> 00:00:51,000 Fuck it, let's play! 15 00:00:51,000 --> 00:00:57,000 The banquet hall is a buzz, as everybody's taking their seats getting ready for the ceremony. 16 00:00:57,000 --> 00:01:07,000 The music is gently lifting, encouraging people to start to quiet down, and we move among the crowd. 17 00:01:07,000 --> 00:01:10,000 Kavlaran, where have you placed yourself? 18 00:01:10,000 --> 00:01:20,000 Well, I took a look at the seating chart and I actually didn't see a spot for me anywhere, which was both upsetting and about right. 19 00:01:20,000 --> 00:01:24,000 So he's just kind of playing Rover at the moment. 20 00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:26,000 He just drifts from table to table. 21 00:01:26,000 --> 00:01:34,000 If there's an open seat, he'll go just hang out for a couple minutes until, you know, the person's back from the bathroom and he's off to the next seat. 22 00:01:34,000 --> 00:01:36,000 Just filling it for the camera. 23 00:01:36,000 --> 00:01:38,000 Making sure everything looks full. 24 00:01:38,000 --> 00:01:40,000 You are in every picture. 25 00:01:42,000 --> 00:01:43,000 Amazing. 26 00:01:43,000 --> 00:01:44,000 Lady M? 27 00:01:44,000 --> 00:01:49,000 Well, Lady M has found all of the highest status people and has joined with them. 28 00:01:49,000 --> 00:02:01,000 These are all the lords and ladies, the zoomed-ins, the pet bros, the Balquins, everyone that she was brought up with and has known for many, many, many years. 29 00:02:01,000 --> 00:02:06,000 So they're all together and chatting and catching up on life. 30 00:02:06,000 --> 00:02:18,000 She has produced a few documents showing how unfairly she was treated in the dissolving of her marriage and the subsequent settlement. 31 00:02:18,000 --> 00:02:21,000 But I mean, it's very it's she's doing it classily. 32 00:02:21,000 --> 00:02:22,000 Of course. 33 00:02:22,000 --> 00:02:23,000 Yeah. 34 00:02:23,000 --> 00:02:28,000 Well, there's some people looking over these documents with some with some scowls on their face. 35 00:02:28,000 --> 00:02:29,000 Yes. 36 00:02:29,000 --> 00:02:33,000 Yeah. The narrative wasn't really to her favor. 37 00:02:33,000 --> 00:02:35,000 We move over to Ellowin. 38 00:02:35,000 --> 00:02:36,000 Where are you seated? 39 00:02:36,000 --> 00:02:40,000 Are we is this like at the front with the bridesmaids? 40 00:02:40,000 --> 00:02:44,000 Well, I mean, are we sitting down? 41 00:02:44,000 --> 00:02:46,000 Like, what is the situation here? 42 00:02:46,000 --> 00:02:50,000 Are we talking like pews aisle bridesides groom side? 43 00:02:50,000 --> 00:02:55,000 Are we is it just more of like open table? 44 00:02:55,000 --> 00:02:57,000 We know this is a fifth marriage. 45 00:02:57,000 --> 00:02:59,000 They didn't quite put as much money into it. 46 00:02:59,000 --> 00:03:00,000 Yeah. 47 00:03:00,000 --> 00:03:01,000 Where are we? 48 00:03:01,000 --> 00:03:02,000 Yeah. 49 00:03:02,000 --> 00:03:08,000 No, there's definitely we said there were tables being moved around, but those I think were a little bit more off to the side. 50 00:03:08,000 --> 00:03:11,000 So we do have rows of chairs. 51 00:03:11,000 --> 00:03:17,000 There is loose bride side groom side, but everybody's encouraged to sit wherever they please. 52 00:03:17,000 --> 00:03:23,000 So long as Kavlaran can keep eyes on everybody at all times. 53 00:03:23,000 --> 00:03:37,000 I'm in the front row and I'm trying to catch the like the attention of the person who will be performing the wedding ceremony. 54 00:03:37,000 --> 00:03:38,000 The officiant. 55 00:03:38,000 --> 00:03:39,000 Yes. 56 00:03:39,000 --> 00:03:40,000 Yes. 57 00:03:40,000 --> 00:03:41,000 Wherever they might be. 58 00:03:41,000 --> 00:03:42,000 I don't know. 59 00:03:42,000 --> 00:03:43,000 Yeah. 60 00:03:43,000 --> 00:03:46,000 Look, what are you doing to try and catch his attention? 61 00:03:46,000 --> 00:03:49,000 Just like a little like. 62 00:03:49,000 --> 00:03:52,000 Whoo. 63 00:03:52,000 --> 00:03:57,000 He's just kind of shut up, Tom. 64 00:03:57,000 --> 00:04:01,000 Go try and give him that cool high five that you have did. 65 00:04:01,000 --> 00:04:03,000 That will get it'll get his attention. 66 00:04:03,000 --> 00:04:07,000 You see him kind of look up and then back to his notes. 67 00:04:08,000 --> 00:04:10,000 We're going to be beginning in just a moment. 68 00:04:10,000 --> 00:04:11,000 Yes. 69 00:04:11,000 --> 00:04:12,000 No, I know. 70 00:04:12,000 --> 00:04:13,000 I know. 71 00:04:13,000 --> 00:04:14,000 I know. 72 00:04:14,000 --> 00:04:15,000 I just have I have a quick question. 73 00:04:15,000 --> 00:04:16,000 OK. 74 00:04:16,000 --> 00:04:17,000 Have you have you met with the bride and groom? 75 00:04:17,000 --> 00:04:18,000 Oh, yes. 76 00:04:18,000 --> 00:04:19,000 Yes. 77 00:04:19,000 --> 00:04:20,000 It's a formal. 78 00:04:20,000 --> 00:04:23,000 We do meet several times leading up to. 79 00:04:23,000 --> 00:04:25,000 Oh, Catholic wedding. 80 00:04:25,000 --> 00:04:27,000 Yeah. 81 00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:29,000 Well, I don't like to just show up. 82 00:04:29,000 --> 00:04:31,000 You know, I don't like to get to know him. 83 00:04:31,000 --> 00:04:34,000 You know, play a game of like gin rummy. 84 00:04:34,000 --> 00:04:39,000 You know, really set the stage for what they want. 85 00:04:39,000 --> 00:04:42,000 So have they done marriage classes? 86 00:04:42,000 --> 00:04:50,000 Like how how dedicated do you feel like this this engagement is? 87 00:04:50,000 --> 00:04:53,000 He kind of pauses. 88 00:04:53,000 --> 00:05:00,000 And are you going to be asking if anybody has anything to say? 89 00:05:01,000 --> 00:05:03,000 That's kind of can see this happening. 90 00:05:03,000 --> 00:05:08,000 And it's like frantically like getting through the crowd to get out there. 91 00:05:08,000 --> 00:05:10,000 And like he kind of slides in. 92 00:05:10,000 --> 00:05:12,000 So, hey, what are you guys talking about? 93 00:05:12,000 --> 00:05:15,000 Well, every wedding's different. 94 00:05:15,000 --> 00:05:17,000 Your dad would know. 95 00:05:17,000 --> 00:05:25,000 But I was wondering if this was going to be just a traditional, you know, ceremony or. 96 00:05:25,000 --> 00:05:26,000 Well, you know what? 97 00:05:26,000 --> 00:05:27,000 You know what? 98 00:05:27,000 --> 00:05:31,000 You know, what's fun, Elwin, is maybe we just like experience as it happens 99 00:05:31,000 --> 00:05:34,000 and we just like drink it all in while it's happening, 100 00:05:34,000 --> 00:05:39,000 because like not knowing is part of like the fun, right? 101 00:05:39,000 --> 00:05:43,000 And on that confused look, we transition over to Yselle. 102 00:05:43,000 --> 00:05:49,000 Like, I think that's I think you're talking about a birthday present. 103 00:05:49,000 --> 00:05:51,000 Not a wedding. 104 00:05:51,000 --> 00:05:52,000 Not a wedding. 105 00:05:52,000 --> 00:05:54,000 Where's where's Yselle and what's Yselle up to? 106 00:05:54,000 --> 00:06:00,000 Yselle has clocked a bridesmaid and her spouse. 107 00:06:00,000 --> 00:06:05,000 And now that they've started separating off for the bridesmaid to be with the bridal party, 108 00:06:05,000 --> 00:06:12,000 I've sat myself next to him and I am openly flirting with him in hopes of upsetting her. 109 00:06:12,000 --> 00:06:13,000 Get it, girl. 110 00:06:13,000 --> 00:06:14,000 All right. 111 00:06:14,000 --> 00:06:17,000 I like your and my goal. 112 00:06:17,000 --> 00:06:20,000 Yeah, it's literally to like make her mad. 113 00:06:21,000 --> 00:06:30,000 You sidle up to this gentleman like in it so you can still be seen as this is happening. 114 00:06:30,000 --> 00:06:31,000 Yeah. 115 00:06:31,000 --> 00:06:33,000 What's your first move? 116 00:06:33,000 --> 00:06:39,000 First move is like, oh, that is quite the garment you're wearing there. 117 00:06:39,000 --> 00:06:42,000 Where did you where did you get that fashion? 118 00:06:42,000 --> 00:06:45,000 Oh, well, it's a custom piece. 119 00:06:45,000 --> 00:06:48,000 There's a new tailor downtown. 120 00:06:48,000 --> 00:06:51,000 It's invite only, Fredericks. 121 00:06:51,000 --> 00:06:55,000 If you know somebody, he pulls out a card and hands it to you. 122 00:06:55,000 --> 00:06:57,000 Get you in there. 123 00:06:57,000 --> 00:06:58,000 Oh, thank you so much. 124 00:06:58,000 --> 00:07:01,000 I take the card and I scoot up and I sit next to him. 125 00:07:01,000 --> 00:07:06,000 Say, have you ever shopped at a chest of drawers? 126 00:07:06,000 --> 00:07:13,000 As a matter of fact, I have and he's looking around. 127 00:07:13,000 --> 00:07:17,000 He's part back some of his hair. 128 00:07:17,000 --> 00:07:20,000 Look out of the corner of your eye. 129 00:07:20,000 --> 00:07:22,000 I'm looking for it. 130 00:07:22,000 --> 00:07:24,000 Look out of the corner of your eye. 131 00:07:24,000 --> 00:07:25,000 It's so intimate. 132 00:07:25,000 --> 00:07:28,000 Just watching Amy do that, I was like, I shouldn't see that. 133 00:07:28,000 --> 00:07:30,000 It's very intimate. 134 00:07:30,000 --> 00:07:33,000 Kav clocks this from across the room. 135 00:07:33,000 --> 00:07:35,000 And the bridesmaids have clocked this. 136 00:07:35,000 --> 00:07:37,000 Like they're lined up like on the hallway. 137 00:07:37,000 --> 00:07:38,000 They're not far out. 138 00:07:38,000 --> 00:07:42,000 And you just turn and you look and you see like she's just got fire in her eyes. 139 00:07:42,000 --> 00:07:45,000 Like, what the hell are you doing? 140 00:07:45,000 --> 00:07:46,000 Big smile. 141 00:07:46,000 --> 00:07:47,000 Yeah. 142 00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:51,000 Hey, mom, mom, this isn't where you're supposed to be sitting. 143 00:07:51,000 --> 00:07:55,000 Oh, Kav, darling, have you met my friend? 144 00:07:55,000 --> 00:07:57,000 Was it Chris? 145 00:07:57,000 --> 00:07:59,000 Frederick. 146 00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:00,000 Frederick. 147 00:08:00,000 --> 00:08:03,000 It's your shop. 148 00:08:03,000 --> 00:08:05,000 She's flirting with you. 149 00:08:05,000 --> 00:08:06,000 Trying to get at them. 150 00:08:06,000 --> 00:08:09,000 You're just trying to make a sale. 151 00:08:09,000 --> 00:08:10,000 What is happening? 152 00:08:10,000 --> 00:08:13,000 The amount of deception layered. 153 00:08:13,000 --> 00:08:16,000 Layer is an onion in this bitch. 154 00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:25,000 Frederick, I was just having a conversation with this lovely gentleman. 155 00:08:25,000 --> 00:08:29,000 Where is the ceremony going to start soon? 156 00:08:29,000 --> 00:08:30,000 I'd really like. 157 00:08:30,000 --> 00:08:31,000 I'm hungry. 158 00:08:31,000 --> 00:08:32,000 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 159 00:08:32,000 --> 00:08:34,000 No, it's going to start real soon. 160 00:08:34,000 --> 00:08:37,000 But you know that I've always got your back, sweet mother. 161 00:08:37,000 --> 00:08:40,000 So Kav reaches into his pocket and pulls out. 162 00:08:40,000 --> 00:08:43,000 I'm assuming some sort of candy bar type of treat. 163 00:08:43,000 --> 00:08:47,000 I just don't know what that would be in this scenario. 164 00:08:47,000 --> 00:08:48,000 A piece of honeycomb. 165 00:08:48,000 --> 00:08:49,000 What do we got? 166 00:08:49,000 --> 00:08:52,000 Yeah, sticky gooey. 167 00:08:52,000 --> 00:08:56,000 They're called globby goose. 168 00:08:56,000 --> 00:09:00,000 All the kids love them, which is why the Kavlaran has so many of them. 169 00:09:00,000 --> 00:09:03,000 But because they've been in your pocket, they are a little warmed. 170 00:09:03,000 --> 00:09:08,000 So the parchment that they're wrapped in is like all mounted and stuck together. 171 00:09:08,000 --> 00:09:13,000 And you hand it to her and it's like squishing into Play-Doh. 172 00:09:13,000 --> 00:09:23,000 So, you know, just let's let's go get you over to your seat where you can hang out with the Schneiderhounds. 173 00:09:23,000 --> 00:09:24,000 Schneiderhounds. 174 00:09:24,000 --> 00:09:26,000 Oh, that's going to hang out with them. 175 00:09:26,000 --> 00:09:34,000 Yeah, yeah, because I talked to to to Papa and he figured that would be a really good table for you to spend some time at. 176 00:09:34,000 --> 00:09:36,000 I think your papa is right. 177 00:09:36,000 --> 00:09:39,000 I'm going to have a good time with the Schneiderhounds. 178 00:09:39,000 --> 00:09:43,000 Now, we have to talk about this thing where you keep leaving candy in your pockets. 179 00:09:43,000 --> 00:09:48,000 I've been telling you since you were a young lad that you need to remove them, otherwise they will melt. 180 00:09:48,000 --> 00:09:50,000 Here, let's go wash your hands off. 181 00:09:50,000 --> 00:10:00,000 OK, Mom, as you get up and you're going to wash his hands off, you're walking like down the aisle as the music. 182 00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:03,000 We are not. 183 00:10:03,000 --> 00:10:06,000 We are not walking down the aisle. 184 00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:17,000 OK, you're walking up the aisle then as the music like cuts out and the officiant looks at you and says, if you could please, please take your seats. 185 00:10:17,000 --> 00:10:20,000 He has to wash his hands just one second. 186 00:10:20,000 --> 00:10:22,000 It's OK. We'll just we'll sit right here. 187 00:10:22,000 --> 00:10:23,000 I'll just... 188 00:10:23,000 --> 00:10:24,000 Did you have a wet wipe? 189 00:10:24,000 --> 00:10:25,000 Yes, let me check. 190 00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:28,000 Dig out a wet wipe and get his face. 191 00:10:28,000 --> 00:10:31,000 Sorry, old habits and hand it to him. 192 00:10:31,000 --> 00:10:38,000 The music as you sit down picks up and the bridal party begins to enter. 193 00:10:38,000 --> 00:10:45,000 Everybody looks very beautiful, very pink floral bridesmaids dresses. 194 00:10:45,000 --> 00:10:50,000 The groomsmen come in. Kavlaran you were not invited to be a groomsmen. 195 00:10:50,000 --> 00:10:52,000 Neither here nor there. 196 00:10:52,000 --> 00:10:56,000 You've got a much more important job happening right now in the eyes of your father, though. 197 00:10:56,000 --> 00:11:10,000 And then the bridal procession starts and your father walks in and he is nervously looking around the room for Kavlaran you clock him. 198 00:11:10,000 --> 00:11:17,000 He's looking for you and he catches your eye and he gives you like just like a very sneaky thumbs up. 199 00:11:17,000 --> 00:11:18,000 Like everything OK? 200 00:11:18,000 --> 00:11:27,000 And with with Kav's mom right next to me like holds up a hand and is like 50-50 sign. 201 00:11:27,000 --> 00:11:35,000 Yeah, he gives a nod to kind of the side and shrugs and he walks past you and just here under his breath. 202 00:11:35,000 --> 00:11:38,000 Well, here we go and makes his way up. 203 00:11:38,000 --> 00:11:40,000 I can do this. 204 00:11:40,000 --> 00:11:42,000 I can do this. 205 00:11:42,000 --> 00:11:48,000 I don't know how many of you would have met the bride previous. 206 00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:57,000 It sounds like not all of you certainly have, but she enters led with her father coming in. 207 00:11:57,000 --> 00:12:06,000 Very beautiful long gown sequined dress, long train and veil, very fair skinned. 208 00:12:06,000 --> 00:12:11,000 She looks younger, not young, but younger. 209 00:12:11,000 --> 00:12:13,000 We're all half elves, what does that mean? 210 00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:14,000 As they all do. 211 00:12:14,000 --> 00:12:17,000 Oh, you know, you know. 212 00:12:17,000 --> 00:12:19,000 I know. 213 00:12:19,000 --> 00:12:26,000 And she's led up to the front of the room and handed, not handed. 214 00:12:26,000 --> 00:12:28,000 We're not going to do that bullshit. 215 00:12:28,000 --> 00:12:30,000 My face is used, you said it. 216 00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:31,000 No. 217 00:12:31,000 --> 00:12:32,000 Gross. 218 00:12:32,000 --> 00:12:34,000 Kav's dad gives her dad a goat. 219 00:12:34,000 --> 00:12:36,000 The ceremony begins. 220 00:12:36,000 --> 00:12:40,000 He hits her over the head with his club, drags her back. 221 00:12:40,000 --> 00:12:42,000 Marriage. 222 00:12:42,000 --> 00:12:43,000 Ceremony done. 223 00:12:43,000 --> 00:12:46,000 Because it's fantasy, it needs to be realistic. 224 00:12:46,000 --> 00:12:47,000 That's right. 225 00:12:47,000 --> 00:12:53,000 They part, he sits back down and all of them are up there. 226 00:12:53,000 --> 00:12:54,000 Are we in the middle? 227 00:12:54,000 --> 00:12:55,000 Russ hit record, so I feel like we're in it. 228 00:12:55,000 --> 00:12:56,000 I don't know. 229 00:12:56,000 --> 00:12:57,000 Yeah. 230 00:12:57,000 --> 00:12:58,000 We're in the middle of talking about wonderful stuff. 231 00:12:58,000 --> 00:13:02,000 We're in the middle of talking about dogs and how much we love them. 232 00:13:02,000 --> 00:13:03,000 Exactly. 233 00:13:03,000 --> 00:13:04,000 Love dogs? 234 00:13:04,000 --> 00:13:05,000 Exactly. 235 00:13:05,000 --> 00:13:06,000 You know what else? 236 00:13:06,000 --> 00:13:07,000 Or love the people who listen to us. 237 00:13:07,000 --> 00:13:08,000 Exactly. 238 00:13:08,000 --> 00:13:09,000 Yes. 239 00:13:09,000 --> 00:13:10,000 I was going to say we love dogs. 240 00:13:10,000 --> 00:13:16,000 We love things with D, like Dumbgeons and Dragons, and Dumbgeons and Dragons listeners. 241 00:13:16,000 --> 00:13:19,000 It just turns our podcast into an adjective. 242 00:13:19,000 --> 00:13:20,000 Sure. 243 00:13:20,000 --> 00:13:21,000 Yeah. 244 00:13:21,000 --> 00:13:22,000 I like it. 245 00:13:22,000 --> 00:13:26,000 It also brings us very quickly to the Patreon dedication. 246 00:13:26,000 --> 00:13:32,000 If we're doing things that start with D, it felt like a natural transition to 247 00:13:32,000 --> 00:13:33,000 throw to that. 248 00:13:33,000 --> 00:13:38,000 Today's episode is dedicated to Donna Nalbone. 249 00:13:38,000 --> 00:13:41,000 Thank you, Donna. 250 00:13:41,000 --> 00:13:42,000 Wow. 251 00:13:42,000 --> 00:13:43,000 I love it. 252 00:13:43,000 --> 00:13:45,000 Donna, this was meant to be your episode. 253 00:13:45,000 --> 00:13:46,000 Absolutely. 254 00:13:46,000 --> 00:13:47,000 Oh my goodness. 255 00:13:47,000 --> 00:13:49,000 I hope we don't all D-I-E, Donna. 256 00:13:49,000 --> 00:13:50,000 I'm sorry. 257 00:13:50,000 --> 00:13:51,000 Oh no. 258 00:13:51,000 --> 00:13:53,000 That would be a memorable episode for you though. 259 00:13:53,000 --> 00:13:54,000 It would be a memorable episode. 260 00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:55,000 We're going to not. 261 00:13:55,000 --> 00:13:58,000 We're going to not, Donna, because we love you. 262 00:13:58,000 --> 00:13:59,000 Yeah. 263 00:13:59,000 --> 00:14:00,000 For that reason alone. 264 00:14:00,000 --> 00:14:01,000 Do we die? 265 00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:02,000 We do not. 266 00:14:02,000 --> 00:14:03,000 Or do we? 267 00:14:03,000 --> 00:14:04,000 Who knows? 268 00:14:04,000 --> 00:14:05,000 Russ, right? 269 00:14:05,000 --> 00:14:06,000 Don't, Russ. 270 00:14:06,000 --> 00:14:07,000 What? 271 00:14:07,000 --> 00:14:12,000 I can't kill you all off with Amy not here. 272 00:14:12,000 --> 00:14:13,000 That's true. 273 00:14:13,000 --> 00:14:14,000 That would be just rude. 274 00:14:14,000 --> 00:14:17,000 This is the hard launch of the podcast, Just Being the Morse. 275 00:14:17,000 --> 00:14:20,000 To be fair, recording would be a lot easier. 276 00:14:20,000 --> 00:14:22,000 Oh my god, really? 277 00:14:22,000 --> 00:14:23,000 Yeah. 278 00:14:23,000 --> 00:14:24,000 I feel like Amy. 279 00:14:24,000 --> 00:14:27,000 You wouldn't have to be wrangling nearly as much. 280 00:14:27,000 --> 00:14:28,000 That's true. 281 00:14:28,000 --> 00:14:33,000 The prank would be good though, is if Amy and I sit down and we're just sitting here waiting 282 00:14:33,000 --> 00:14:37,000 and then I just go live and then nobody else is here. 283 00:14:37,000 --> 00:14:38,000 She's like, what the heck? 284 00:14:38,000 --> 00:14:39,000 Just Jess up in the corner. 285 00:14:39,000 --> 00:14:41,000 Oh, that would be pretty funny. 286 00:14:41,000 --> 00:14:43,000 Okay, so maybe for like an April Fools thing. 287 00:14:43,000 --> 00:14:45,000 Maybe for April Fools or something. 288 00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:46,000 Maybe, yeah. 289 00:14:46,000 --> 00:14:49,000 Or we can flip the narrative where it's like, yeah, all of us die and all of a 290 00:14:49,000 --> 00:14:52,000 sudden we're the children to Alydin. 291 00:14:52,000 --> 00:14:55,000 There it is. 292 00:14:55,000 --> 00:14:56,000 Yep. 293 00:14:56,000 --> 00:15:00,000 Well, Donna, if that happens, it's because of this brainstorm. 294 00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:01,000 You heard it here first. 295 00:15:01,000 --> 00:15:02,000 Yes. 296 00:15:02,000 --> 00:15:03,000 So thank you, Donna. 297 00:15:03,000 --> 00:15:04,000 Thanks, Donna. 298 00:15:04,000 --> 00:15:05,000 Yep. 299 00:15:05,000 --> 00:15:08,000 Hey, you can join us on Patreon at patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast, where you get 300 00:15:08,000 --> 00:15:09,000 a week free. 301 00:15:09,000 --> 00:15:11,000 And when does this episode come out? 302 00:15:11,000 --> 00:15:12,000 I don't know. 303 00:15:12,000 --> 00:15:13,000 We probably got a sale going on soon. 304 00:15:13,000 --> 00:15:15,000 So check it out. 305 00:15:15,000 --> 00:15:17,000 I don't know what day this comes out. 306 00:15:17,000 --> 00:15:20,000 So could be now, could be in a week from now. 307 00:15:20,000 --> 00:15:21,000 It's happening. 308 00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:22,000 Either way, it's around the corner. 309 00:15:22,000 --> 00:15:23,000 It is. 310 00:15:23,000 --> 00:15:24,000 Always is. 311 00:15:24,000 --> 00:15:26,000 It's going to be on a day ending. 312 00:15:26,000 --> 00:15:27,000 And why? 313 00:15:27,000 --> 00:15:29,000 Oh, I know it. 314 00:15:29,000 --> 00:15:30,000 Thanks for listening. 315 00:15:30,000 --> 00:15:31,000 We love you. 316 00:15:31,000 --> 00:15:32,000 We'll talk to you very soon. 317 00:15:32,000 --> 00:15:33,000 OK, bye. 318 00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:34,000 Love you. 319 00:15:34,000 --> 00:15:35,000 Bye. 320 00:15:35,000 --> 00:15:41,000 The officiant begins and we kind of cut ahead a little bit. 321 00:15:41,000 --> 00:15:50,000 And the officiant finishes his speech and nods towards Lord Harrison, who takes 322 00:15:50,000 --> 00:16:00,000 his bride's hands and he smiles genuinely, looks to the crowd, sees all of his wives 323 00:16:00,000 --> 00:16:03,000 and then looks to Kavlaran. 324 00:16:03,000 --> 00:16:08,000 What's the I guess what's the face that everybody gives as he's looking around 325 00:16:08,000 --> 00:16:10,000 and sees each of you three? 326 00:16:10,000 --> 00:16:20,000 Elowen's decided to sit on the left side so that when he's facing the bride, he's 327 00:16:20,000 --> 00:16:23,000 looking at her like in her mind, right? 328 00:16:23,000 --> 00:16:32,000 Like she's got his eyes and she is just like, like just like holding it back. 329 00:16:32,000 --> 00:16:37,000 He kind of pans her over, likely sees Lady M. 330 00:16:37,000 --> 00:16:39,000 Just impassivity. 331 00:16:39,000 --> 00:16:41,000 Cool as a cucumber. 332 00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:42,000 Nods. 333 00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:43,000 Yeah, nods. 334 00:16:43,000 --> 00:16:44,000 That's what I expect. 335 00:16:44,000 --> 00:16:47,000 And then back over to Kavlaran and Ezell. 336 00:16:47,000 --> 00:16:52,000 Who has stepped away and is filling up a glass of rose. 337 00:16:52,000 --> 00:16:54,000 From behind the bar. 338 00:16:54,000 --> 00:17:01,000 He looks at Kavlaran, a little confused, but then looks to the bar and yeah, OK. 339 00:17:01,000 --> 00:17:07,000 And then looks to Kavlaran and he just like starts counting. 340 00:17:07,000 --> 00:17:10,000 And then gives like a questioning four. 341 00:17:10,000 --> 00:17:15,000 Like Kavlaran holds his hands up in a little X and a little like shrug like. 342 00:17:15,000 --> 00:17:17,000 I love the charades game. 343 00:17:17,000 --> 00:17:21,000 I love it as if not everyone can see. 344 00:17:21,000 --> 00:17:28,000 The officiant just stopped talking and then they're like, they're doing baseball signals. 345 00:17:28,000 --> 00:17:29,000 It's cool. 346 00:17:29,000 --> 00:17:37,000 He looks back to his wife and his soon to be wife rather and begins his vows and clears his throat. 347 00:17:37,000 --> 00:17:49,000 And he says, my love, I stand before you, having lived a life enthusiastically. 348 00:17:49,000 --> 00:17:55,000 There's a gentle laugh from the crowd. 349 00:17:55,000 --> 00:17:57,000 I have loved boldly. 350 00:17:57,000 --> 00:18:01,000 I have loved poorly. 351 00:18:01,000 --> 00:18:07,000 And I have loved in ways that taught me exactly what love is not. 352 00:18:07,000 --> 00:18:13,000 Elwyn leans to the person beside her and goes, does he say the same vows every time? 353 00:18:13,000 --> 00:18:14,000 They look over to you. 354 00:18:14,000 --> 00:18:17,000 Really? 355 00:18:17,000 --> 00:18:21,000 You see him kind of nervously squeeze her hands. 356 00:18:21,000 --> 00:18:23,000 But loving you feels different. 357 00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:29,000 It's not because it's perfect, but because it is honest. 358 00:18:29,000 --> 00:18:32,000 Takes a breath steady. 359 00:18:32,000 --> 00:18:40,000 I promise not that I will never err, but that I will always return. 360 00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:49,000 Not that I will never doubt, but that I will never hide those doubts from you. 361 00:18:49,000 --> 00:18:57,000 And he kind of looks over to Kavlaran and gives like a little like, you got this? 362 00:18:57,000 --> 00:19:01,000 He's slowly snaking his way to other seats. 363 00:19:01,000 --> 00:19:07,000 And not that this love will be the last, only that it will be the truest. 364 00:19:07,000 --> 00:19:13,000 Slides a new drink in front of Lady Eve and takes her old one away. 365 00:19:13,000 --> 00:19:17,000 I have learned that love is not proven, but how fiercely it burns. 366 00:19:17,000 --> 00:19:21,000 But by how carefully it is tended. 367 00:19:21,000 --> 00:19:23,000 He smiles softer now. 368 00:19:23,000 --> 00:19:24,000 Tissues for Elwyn. 369 00:19:24,000 --> 00:19:26,000 So I vow this. 370 00:19:26,000 --> 00:19:36,000 To choose you in joy, to choose you in mess, to choose you even when the world grows loud with old stories. 371 00:19:36,000 --> 00:19:43,000 And he glances just briefly toward the crowd, toward the past for him. 372 00:19:43,000 --> 00:19:45,000 I have lived many chapters. 373 00:19:45,000 --> 00:19:48,000 Today, I am not erasing them. 374 00:19:48,000 --> 00:19:50,000 I am turning the page. 375 00:19:50,000 --> 00:19:53,000 And he lifts her hands and says, with you. 376 00:19:53,000 --> 00:19:58,000 She goes on to say her vows, because this isn't about her, this is about him. 377 00:19:58,000 --> 00:20:00,000 I still don't even think they caught her name. 378 00:20:00,000 --> 00:20:02,000 Nope. 379 00:20:02,000 --> 00:20:04,000 Gwendovir. 380 00:20:04,000 --> 00:20:06,000 Gwendovir, a beautiful name. 381 00:20:06,000 --> 00:20:09,000 The most beautiful name in the world. 382 00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:13,000 Which I feel like I've said before, but I can't remember about who. 383 00:20:13,000 --> 00:20:15,000 For sure you have. 384 00:20:15,000 --> 00:20:17,000 I've gotten written down. 385 00:20:17,000 --> 00:20:19,000 Good, good, good. 386 00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:21,000 It's a common name. 387 00:20:21,000 --> 00:20:23,000 Because it's so beautiful. 388 00:20:23,000 --> 00:20:25,000 It's so beautiful. 389 00:20:25,000 --> 00:20:27,000 The vows are finished. 390 00:20:27,000 --> 00:20:29,000 It has beautiful vows, honestly. 391 00:20:29,000 --> 00:20:31,000 Yeah, really nice. 392 00:20:31,000 --> 00:20:33,000 I mean, this guy sucks, but beautiful. 393 00:20:33,000 --> 00:20:35,000 Yeah, no, he's working through some things. 394 00:20:35,000 --> 00:20:41,000 I like how he snuck in there that this probably won't last, but damn it, will it? 395 00:20:41,000 --> 00:20:43,000 But like, whew. 396 00:20:43,000 --> 00:20:45,000 At least he's honest. 397 00:20:45,000 --> 00:20:48,000 Real better-to-burn-out-than-fade-away situation. 398 00:20:48,000 --> 00:20:51,000 Gotta love that as the fifth wife. 399 00:20:51,000 --> 00:20:55,000 The officiant looks to them and says, the rings. 400 00:20:55,000 --> 00:21:00,000 They exchange their rings and says, 401 00:21:00,000 --> 00:21:06,000 Do you, Lord Harrison, take Lady Gwendovir to be your lawfully wedded wife? 402 00:21:06,000 --> 00:21:09,000 He says, I do. 403 00:21:09,000 --> 00:21:16,000 Lady Gwendovir, do you take Lord Harrison to be your lawfully wedded husband? 404 00:21:16,000 --> 00:21:19,000 And she says, Wait! 405 00:21:23,000 --> 00:21:25,000 I'm sorry, is everything okay? 406 00:21:28,000 --> 00:21:30,000 I'm sorry. 407 00:21:30,000 --> 00:21:32,000 Harrison looks to you and says, Elowen, is everything okay? 408 00:21:32,000 --> 00:21:34,000 No, you're making a mistake. 409 00:21:34,000 --> 00:21:36,000 Oh, Elowen. 410 00:21:36,000 --> 00:21:44,000 The mistake is that you haven't had me up to speak about how awesome you are, Papa. 411 00:21:44,000 --> 00:21:46,000 Of course, of course. 412 00:21:46,000 --> 00:21:47,000 This is a move. 413 00:21:47,000 --> 00:21:48,000 No. 414 00:21:48,000 --> 00:21:50,000 I mean, trying to take that bullet anyway. 415 00:21:50,000 --> 00:21:57,000 For not being invited and then all this, like, you are going above and beyond. 416 00:21:57,000 --> 00:22:05,000 No, Elowen and I had chatted before the ceremony, and she had said it would be such a good idea if I just got up there 417 00:22:05,000 --> 00:22:07,000 and talked about what a great papa you are. 418 00:22:07,000 --> 00:22:12,000 Oh, well, I mean, we had some time at the speeches, but yeah, it's unorthodox. 419 00:22:12,000 --> 00:22:15,000 But of course, yes, come on up, Kavlaran. 420 00:22:15,000 --> 00:22:19,000 He's taking the cue and, like, just allowing this to happen. 421 00:22:19,000 --> 00:22:21,000 Just a second, Gwendovir. 422 00:22:21,000 --> 00:22:30,000 Yes, it's ceremonial in the Goldweave family to have the firstborn son of the third wife come up 423 00:22:30,000 --> 00:22:35,000 and give a speech before the fifth wife's wedding. 424 00:22:35,000 --> 00:22:37,000 Of course, yes, yes. 425 00:22:37,000 --> 00:22:39,000 As everyone here knows already. 426 00:22:39,000 --> 00:22:49,000 You come up and turn to face the crowd who has gone like dead silent. 427 00:22:49,000 --> 00:22:56,000 When I was invited to this wedding, I dropped everything and ran here. 428 00:22:56,000 --> 00:23:00,000 Because I knew how important it was to my papa. 429 00:23:00,000 --> 00:23:10,000 And he has always been there for me through thick and thin, wedding after wedding after wedding. 430 00:23:10,000 --> 00:23:13,000 He's my rock. 431 00:23:13,000 --> 00:23:18,000 And it's really nice to see that he's found someone to be his rock. 432 00:23:18,000 --> 00:23:22,000 And I just want to say Gwendovir, this beautiful name. 433 00:23:22,000 --> 00:23:25,000 I've never heard it before, but it's absolutely amazing. 434 00:23:25,000 --> 00:23:27,000 It's lovely to meet you for the first time, Kavlaran. 435 00:23:27,000 --> 00:23:31,000 Yes, yes, interesting circumstances to meet someone. 436 00:23:31,000 --> 00:23:37,000 But I just I wanted to say welcome to the family and fifth time's the charm. 437 00:23:37,000 --> 00:23:41,000 And I hold up my drink of the same name. 438 00:23:41,000 --> 00:23:45,000 Everybody else in the crowd also holds up their drink. 439 00:23:45,000 --> 00:23:49,000 Your father leans into you and says that was very moving. 440 00:23:50,000 --> 00:23:52,000 I knew I had you. 441 00:23:52,000 --> 00:23:55,000 You know what? You're in the wrong place, Kavlaran. 442 00:23:55,000 --> 00:23:58,000 And he turns to his best man. 443 00:23:58,000 --> 00:24:00,000 Oh, no, no, no, no, that's quite all right. 444 00:24:00,000 --> 00:24:01,000 He's doing it. 445 00:24:01,000 --> 00:24:02,000 It's quite all right. 446 00:24:02,000 --> 00:24:04,000 And he's like, Gary, go sit down. 447 00:24:04,000 --> 00:24:06,000 He's demoting him. 448 00:24:06,000 --> 00:24:08,000 He's demoting Gary. 449 00:24:08,000 --> 00:24:10,000 Gary, I'm so sorry. 450 00:24:10,000 --> 00:24:14,000 Gary spent so much on the bachelor party. 451 00:24:14,000 --> 00:24:17,000 Gary's out a lot. 452 00:24:17,000 --> 00:24:19,000 I'm so sorry, Gary. 453 00:24:19,000 --> 00:24:20,000 I'm so sorry. 454 00:24:20,000 --> 00:24:22,000 Yeah, that'd be another one in a couple of years. 455 00:24:22,000 --> 00:24:24,000 It's fine. 456 00:24:24,000 --> 00:24:28,000 And he pulls you up and says, you come stand here. 457 00:24:28,000 --> 00:24:30,000 And then he leans in. 458 00:24:30,000 --> 00:24:33,000 He's like, it's also a better vantage point, just in case. 459 00:24:33,000 --> 00:24:36,000 Well, you know who shows up. 460 00:24:36,000 --> 00:24:39,000 Oh, no, that's 100 percent why I thought you were doing that. 461 00:24:39,000 --> 00:24:41,000 Yes. No, I appreciate it. 462 00:24:41,000 --> 00:24:43,000 Also, Elluin looked like she was going to just lose it. 463 00:24:43,000 --> 00:24:45,000 Anyway, back to the wedding. 464 00:24:46,000 --> 00:24:48,000 Sorry. 465 00:24:48,000 --> 00:24:50,000 His lapel mic's been on the whole time. 466 00:24:50,000 --> 00:24:52,000 Yeah. 467 00:24:52,000 --> 00:24:53,000 Where were we? 468 00:24:53,000 --> 00:24:55,000 And Guindavere looks at him and says, 469 00:24:55,000 --> 00:24:58,000 well, I was just about to say, I do. 470 00:25:01,000 --> 00:25:06,000 And she looks around the crowd and sees the various states of previous wives. 471 00:25:06,000 --> 00:25:10,000 And she says, you see, everybody looks at her. 472 00:25:10,000 --> 00:25:14,000 And she's got this face like, I can fix him. 473 00:25:14,000 --> 00:25:16,000 And she says, I can do this. 474 00:25:16,000 --> 00:25:18,000 I can do this. 475 00:25:18,000 --> 00:25:20,000 I can do this. 476 00:25:20,000 --> 00:25:22,000 I do. 477 00:25:22,000 --> 00:25:28,000 The officiant says, well, with that, you are now Mr. 478 00:25:28,000 --> 00:25:31,000 and Mrs. Lord Harrison Goldweave. 479 00:25:31,000 --> 00:25:34,000 You may now kiss the bride. 480 00:25:34,000 --> 00:25:36,000 They do. 481 00:25:36,000 --> 00:25:39,000 There's a ruckus cheer from the crowd. 482 00:25:39,000 --> 00:25:42,000 Maybe not everybody, but. 483 00:25:42,000 --> 00:25:46,000 There's some ugly crying happening in the front row. 484 00:25:46,000 --> 00:25:48,000 Various emotions happening. 485 00:25:48,000 --> 00:25:50,000 The band strikes up again. 486 00:25:50,000 --> 00:25:56,000 And Harrison and Guindavere head back down the aisle. 487 00:25:56,000 --> 00:25:58,000 The crowd sees them off. 488 00:25:58,000 --> 00:26:02,000 And everybody's milling about, not milling about, standing up. 489 00:26:02,000 --> 00:26:04,000 Lots of people heading towards the bar. 490 00:26:04,000 --> 00:26:06,000 There's an announcement that goes over. 491 00:26:06,000 --> 00:26:08,000 It's Benny. 492 00:26:08,000 --> 00:26:14,000 The lord and lady will be taking some time for sketches in the garden. 493 00:26:14,000 --> 00:26:20,000 And then after that, the toasts and dinner shall begin. 494 00:26:20,000 --> 00:26:21,000 The reception shall begin. 495 00:26:21,000 --> 00:26:23,000 That's where that happens. 496 00:26:23,000 --> 00:26:26,000 It's not my first, won't be my last. 497 00:26:26,000 --> 00:26:28,000 He looks at Kavlaran gives him a wink. 498 00:26:28,000 --> 00:26:29,000 He's like, you know. 499 00:26:29,000 --> 00:26:30,000 Killing it, Benny. 500 00:26:30,000 --> 00:26:33,000 100% thought Benny was going to come on and be like, 501 00:26:33,000 --> 00:26:36,000 To the person with the white Prius. 502 00:26:36,000 --> 00:26:39,000 You are parked in the wrong. 503 00:26:39,000 --> 00:26:41,000 In the loading zone. 504 00:26:41,000 --> 00:26:43,000 I just wanted to say that the eagle has landed. 505 00:26:43,000 --> 00:26:47,000 The eagle has landed. 506 00:26:47,000 --> 00:26:48,000 I'll just wait for it. 507 00:26:48,000 --> 00:26:54,000 You see them and the bridal party all head out towards the garden. 508 00:26:54,000 --> 00:26:57,000 Leaving you a moment to make bad decisions. 509 00:26:57,000 --> 00:27:02,000 I think lady M is going to go to Ellowen. 510 00:27:02,000 --> 00:27:05,000 Oh, darling. 511 00:27:05,000 --> 00:27:07,000 Still. 512 00:27:07,000 --> 00:27:09,000 Here, have it. 513 00:27:09,000 --> 00:27:11,000 There's a handkerchief. 514 00:27:11,000 --> 00:27:12,000 I can't believe. 515 00:27:12,000 --> 00:27:15,000 How can you still let him affect you like that? 516 00:27:15,000 --> 00:27:17,000 This is the difference between you and I. 517 00:27:17,000 --> 00:27:18,000 I loved him. 518 00:27:18,000 --> 00:27:20,000 I love him. 519 00:27:20,000 --> 00:27:22,000 And that doesn't just go away. 520 00:27:22,000 --> 00:27:25,000 Well, I know. 521 00:27:25,000 --> 00:27:26,000 I know. 522 00:27:26,000 --> 00:27:27,000 I know. 523 00:27:27,000 --> 00:27:31,000 If their love is real, they should be able to stand up to a question. 524 00:27:31,000 --> 00:27:34,000 Why didn't he ask if anyone objected? 525 00:27:34,000 --> 00:27:35,000 Why didn't he ask? 526 00:27:35,000 --> 00:27:37,000 You're right, my dear. 527 00:27:37,000 --> 00:27:39,000 Oh, you're right. 528 00:27:39,000 --> 00:27:41,000 It's. 529 00:27:41,000 --> 00:27:45,000 I mean, it's very pathetic, but my heart does go out to you. 530 00:27:45,000 --> 00:27:46,000 You're so sad. 531 00:27:46,000 --> 00:27:47,000 Let me come on. 532 00:27:47,000 --> 00:27:48,000 Let's go have a drink. 533 00:27:48,000 --> 00:27:50,000 Not one of these terrible fifth times the charm. 534 00:27:50,000 --> 00:27:53,000 A real drink. 535 00:27:53,000 --> 00:27:59,000 From somewhere in all of the tool of her wedding dress, 536 00:27:59,000 --> 00:28:05,000 she pulls out a little unmarked bottle of amber liquor. 537 00:28:05,000 --> 00:28:06,000 Yes. 538 00:28:06,000 --> 00:28:07,000 It's just like. 539 00:28:07,000 --> 00:28:08,000 Yes. 540 00:28:08,000 --> 00:28:11,000 Ellowen, that is exactly what we need. 541 00:28:11,000 --> 00:28:15,000 I thought it might not have gone my way this time, but I guess. 542 00:28:15,000 --> 00:28:17,000 I suppose there's. 543 00:28:17,000 --> 00:28:19,000 I don't want to say there's still hope. 544 00:28:19,000 --> 00:28:20,000 There isn't hope. 545 00:28:20,000 --> 00:28:21,000 You've aged out. 546 00:28:21,000 --> 00:28:22,000 I'm so sorry. 547 00:28:22,000 --> 00:28:26,000 I wish it wasn't so, but he's a terrible man. 548 00:28:26,000 --> 00:28:30,000 Wouldn't you want someone to fight this hard for you? 549 00:28:30,000 --> 00:28:32,000 It's very romantic. 550 00:28:32,000 --> 00:28:38,000 I will admit it's very romantic, misguided, foolish, embarrassing, 551 00:28:38,000 --> 00:28:40,000 but very romantic. 552 00:28:40,000 --> 00:28:42,000 Two of you have made your way over to the bar 553 00:28:42,000 --> 00:28:44,000 as much as you are drinking from Ellowen. 554 00:28:44,000 --> 00:28:45,000 We're best friends now. 555 00:28:45,000 --> 00:28:46,000 We need a glass. 556 00:28:46,000 --> 00:28:47,000 That's what we need. 557 00:28:47,000 --> 00:28:48,000 We're not animals. 558 00:28:48,000 --> 00:28:52,000 Well, you turn and you see both of them headed towards the bar, 559 00:28:52,000 --> 00:28:54,000 but headed towards your direction. 560 00:28:54,000 --> 00:28:57,000 Because you're now bartending the shindig. 561 00:28:57,000 --> 00:29:01,000 I'm imagining you're just like cocktails there. 562 00:29:01,000 --> 00:29:03,000 We went flair cocktailing. 563 00:29:03,000 --> 00:29:05,000 Yep, I've pushed the bartender out of the way. 564 00:29:05,000 --> 00:29:07,000 I'm just taking care of myself though. 565 00:29:07,000 --> 00:29:10,000 See you two pull up. 566 00:29:10,000 --> 00:29:14,000 Ladies, please have a seat. 567 00:29:14,000 --> 00:29:15,000 Oh, my goodness. 568 00:29:15,000 --> 00:29:17,000 How are you? 569 00:29:17,000 --> 00:29:23,000 I must say, your boy, he's working very hard. 570 00:29:23,000 --> 00:29:25,000 Oh, Cav. 571 00:29:25,000 --> 00:29:28,000 To keep us all contained. 572 00:29:28,000 --> 00:29:32,000 But I had a thought. 573 00:29:32,000 --> 00:29:34,000 I hate him. 574 00:29:34,000 --> 00:29:37,000 Ellowen loves him, but hates him. 575 00:29:37,000 --> 00:29:39,000 Yselle, what are your thoughts? 576 00:29:39,000 --> 00:29:40,000 Do you hate him? 577 00:29:40,000 --> 00:29:41,000 Do you love him? 578 00:29:41,000 --> 00:29:43,000 Do you have strong emotions right now? 579 00:29:43,000 --> 00:29:46,000 You're talking about my son Cavalarin? 580 00:29:46,000 --> 00:29:47,000 No, no. 581 00:29:47,000 --> 00:29:48,000 Of course you love Cav. 582 00:29:48,000 --> 00:29:50,000 I'm talking about that bastard. 583 00:29:50,000 --> 00:29:52,000 A bastard, Harrison. 584 00:29:52,000 --> 00:29:54,000 Cav is an angel. 585 00:29:54,000 --> 00:29:56,000 He is the best thing. 586 00:29:56,000 --> 00:29:57,000 The rosé. 587 00:29:57,000 --> 00:30:00,000 I would never tell you I hate Cav. 588 00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:02,000 Oh, I'm so sorry for the confusion. 589 00:30:02,000 --> 00:30:06,000 I have been drinking out of that small bottle. 590 00:30:06,000 --> 00:30:11,000 Well, honestly, I could give two shits at this point. 591 00:30:11,000 --> 00:30:12,000 I mean... 592 00:30:12,000 --> 00:30:14,000 Oh, good for you. 593 00:30:14,000 --> 00:30:18,000 Sure, it was lovely while it lasted. 594 00:30:18,000 --> 00:30:22,000 It was bright, flashy, and... 595 00:30:25,000 --> 00:30:29,000 I feel like I'm pretty locked in, though, with Cav, so... 596 00:30:29,000 --> 00:30:34,000 Yes, you did get that sweet angel boy out of the deal, so... 597 00:30:34,000 --> 00:30:37,000 You came out ahead of us, didn't she, Ellowen? 598 00:30:37,000 --> 00:30:43,000 Well, I really feel like I came out ahead once the fourth one came around 599 00:30:43,000 --> 00:30:49,000 and it took a little time to stop icing me out just because I gave a kid, 600 00:30:49,000 --> 00:30:53,000 and it's been really nice getting to know you two, and... 601 00:30:53,000 --> 00:30:56,000 The icing out was the worst part. 602 00:30:56,000 --> 00:30:57,000 Just use your words. 603 00:30:57,000 --> 00:30:59,000 You're an adult half-elf. 604 00:30:59,000 --> 00:31:03,000 Just say, I found someone else. 605 00:31:03,000 --> 00:31:08,000 I'm breaking the vows that we made under the name of the gods 606 00:31:08,000 --> 00:31:11,000 and for both of our families' benefits, and I'm moving on. 607 00:31:11,000 --> 00:31:12,000 At least just say it. 608 00:31:12,000 --> 00:31:14,000 Don't just... 609 00:31:14,000 --> 00:31:16,000 Oh, my goodness. 610 00:31:16,000 --> 00:31:17,000 I completely agree. 611 00:31:17,000 --> 00:31:24,000 If he would just say that it meant something and that it was done, 612 00:31:24,000 --> 00:31:26,000 but he didn't ever just say that. 613 00:31:26,000 --> 00:31:32,000 It was just kind of drifty, and then it was over, and like it... 614 00:31:32,000 --> 00:31:36,000 He starts misbehaving as if you're going to leave him. 615 00:31:36,000 --> 00:31:40,000 Hey, hey, what are my three favorite ladies talking about? 616 00:31:40,000 --> 00:31:42,000 Oh, just what an angel you are. 617 00:31:42,000 --> 00:31:46,000 The statistical anomaly of a Sith wedding. 618 00:31:46,000 --> 00:31:50,000 I'll probably have another chance. 619 00:31:50,000 --> 00:31:52,000 And maybe another one after that. 620 00:31:52,000 --> 00:31:53,000 So, you know what? 621 00:31:53,000 --> 00:31:55,000 Life is full of chances. 622 00:31:55,000 --> 00:31:58,000 Yeah, we live a long time. 623 00:31:58,000 --> 00:32:02,000 Kavlarne, you'd rushed back in 624 00:32:02,000 --> 00:32:05,000 because you did get swept away in with the bridal party, 625 00:32:05,000 --> 00:32:08,000 and then as you got outside, your father was like, 626 00:32:08,000 --> 00:32:11,000 As much as I need you, would love to have you out here. 627 00:32:11,000 --> 00:32:12,000 I kind of need you in there. 628 00:32:12,000 --> 00:32:15,000 Could you send Gary back, please? 629 00:32:15,000 --> 00:32:17,000 Oh, Gare Bear. 630 00:32:17,000 --> 00:32:20,000 Gary's a roller coaster of emotions for this wedding. 631 00:32:20,000 --> 00:32:22,000 Poor Gary. I hope he doesn't go. 632 00:32:22,000 --> 00:32:23,000 I hope he leaves. 633 00:32:23,000 --> 00:32:25,000 I hope he stands up for himself. 634 00:32:25,000 --> 00:32:26,000 He should just come over here. 635 00:32:26,000 --> 00:32:27,000 Shit talk, Harrison. 636 00:32:27,000 --> 00:32:29,000 Yeah, he should. 637 00:32:29,000 --> 00:32:31,000 This is where the real party is. 638 00:32:31,000 --> 00:32:34,000 But as you're rejoining this conversation, Kavlarne, 639 00:32:34,000 --> 00:32:37,000 you catch out of the corner of your eye heading... 640 00:32:37,000 --> 00:32:39,000 Someone has walked into the building 641 00:32:39,000 --> 00:32:43,000 and gone down the back hall, and you see this woman, 642 00:32:43,000 --> 00:32:46,000 and she is dressed all in black 643 00:32:46,000 --> 00:32:51,000 and disappears into one of the back areas, 644 00:32:51,000 --> 00:32:54,000 out of sight, and heads back towards 645 00:32:54,000 --> 00:32:59,000 where your father was hanging out before the ceremony. 646 00:33:02,000 --> 00:33:06,000 I don't want to alarm anyone, 647 00:33:06,000 --> 00:33:10,000 but the fourth has arrived. 648 00:33:10,000 --> 00:33:12,000 Interesting. 649 00:33:14,000 --> 00:33:15,000 I don't know about you ladies. 650 00:33:15,000 --> 00:33:17,000 I look forward to seeing her. 651 00:33:17,000 --> 00:33:22,000 I thought I was going to be the one who made the biggest 652 00:33:22,000 --> 00:33:25,000 fool of themselves at this. 653 00:33:25,000 --> 00:33:27,000 Let's see what happens. 654 00:33:27,000 --> 00:33:28,000 Look, I got to go. 655 00:33:28,000 --> 00:33:30,000 I got to go take... 656 00:33:30,000 --> 00:33:31,000 I just... 657 00:33:31,000 --> 00:33:32,000 You know. 658 00:33:32,000 --> 00:33:33,000 You know. 659 00:33:33,000 --> 00:33:34,000 You know. 660 00:33:34,000 --> 00:33:36,000 High fives? 661 00:33:36,000 --> 00:33:37,000 High fives. 662 00:33:37,000 --> 00:33:39,000 Just make sure the bet goes in my direction, okay? 663 00:33:39,000 --> 00:33:41,000 I offer the liquor bottle to him. 664 00:33:41,000 --> 00:33:42,000 You're going to need it. 665 00:33:42,000 --> 00:33:43,000 I take a hit of it. 666 00:33:43,000 --> 00:33:44,000 Absolutely. 667 00:33:44,000 --> 00:33:45,000 You're going to need it. 668 00:33:45,000 --> 00:33:48,000 Kavlarne, you're heading quickly back down the hallway. 669 00:33:48,000 --> 00:33:50,000 You don't know where exactly she went, 670 00:33:50,000 --> 00:33:52,000 but you're checking every single door, 671 00:33:52,000 --> 00:33:55,000 trying to track her down. 672 00:33:56,000 --> 00:34:01,000 Dumbgeons and Dragons Season 4 Episode 47 673 00:34:01,000 --> 00:34:04,000 Starring Tom Laird as Kavlarne Goldweave 674 00:34:04,000 --> 00:34:07,000 Carla Maxted as Lady Marizan the First 675 00:34:07,000 --> 00:34:09,000 Amy More as Ellowin the Second 676 00:34:09,000 --> 00:34:12,000 Kyle Claset as Baroness Yiselle the Third 677 00:34:12,000 --> 00:34:15,000 and Russ More as your Dungeon Master 678 00:34:15,000 --> 00:34:19,000 Dialogue Editing and Sound Design of today's episode is by Russ More. 679 00:34:19,000 --> 00:34:21,000 Our Community Manager is Jessica Babiak 680 00:34:21,000 --> 00:34:23,000 Music is from Epidemic Sound 681 00:34:23,000 --> 00:34:27,000 And sound effects are from Epidemic Sound, Boom Library, and Sound Ideas. 682 00:34:27,000 --> 00:34:30,000 Our amazing cover art is by Matt Garbutt. 683 00:34:30,000 --> 00:34:32,000 A huge thank you to our supporting producers 684 00:34:32,000 --> 00:34:37,000 Gabriel Lynch, Jessica Babiak, Ongorong Kierzen, Perry Matey, 685 00:34:37,000 --> 00:34:41,000 Cat Waterflame, Jacob Madden, Old School Gamer D, 686 00:34:41,000 --> 00:34:46,000 Craig Zeiss, L.A. Branton, Chibs1012, and Kudzu828 687 00:34:46,000 --> 00:34:49,000 Dumbgeons and Dragons is a Patreon-supported podcast 688 00:34:49,000 --> 00:34:52,000 and all of our amazing community help make sure 689 00:34:52,000 --> 00:34:55,000 that we have adventures for you every single week. 690 00:34:55,000 --> 00:34:58,000 Come join us today, patreon.com slash dumbdragoncast. 691 00:34:58,000 --> 00:35:04,000 We hope to see you over there and you have yourself, right now, a great week. 692 00:35:04,000 --> 00:35:06,000 Yes, and we'll talk to you very, very soon. 693 00:35:06,000 --> 00:35:09,000 Dumbgeons and Dragons is a Dumb Dragons production.