[0.0s] They said you were looking for Dumbgeons and Dragons. Well, you found us. We'll begin in just a moment.
[6.5s] It is the next day and the three of you have gathered at Dem Buns though, hoping to see
[12.2s] Bizard. But instead, as you're having your morning coffee and pastries, Foll and Ferram
[22.0s] comes around the corner and sees you and gives a nice wave and goes in to get himself some
[28.3s] breakfast, leaving you three out front as the morning crowd is just opening up shops.
[35.1s] So he wants us to go work for him, like, like go adventure with them. And he's like,
[42.6s] you know, retiree adventure buddies. Do we what do we think about that?
[47.0s] Well, would he, would he, would he pass?
[49.9s] Yeah, I think like as a job.
[51.3s] Yeah, it sounded like it.
[52.6s] What do you guys think? I mean, I don't hate the idea. I gotta say though,
[59.8s] the Alistair thing with the, with the archive like that.
[65.8s] Kind of seemed important.
[67.5s] Yeah, it definitely has some like gravitas.
[70.3s] Like history important, you know?
[73.3s] Yeah.
[73.5s] Like maybe they'll write our names in a book somewhere if we find it.
[77.4s] Ooh, I hadn't even thought of that.
[79.1s] I've read some of those.
[80.9s] Huh.
[82.1s] How many?
[83.0s] Like at least five.
[85.4s] Alydin pretends to look impressed.
[89.3s] Dumbgeons and Dragons is a D&D actual play podcast and I'm your dungeon master Russ
[94.4s] Moore, he, him. Also with me today is Amy More as Alydin, she, her.
[102.7s] Carla Maxted as Bonwyn Everbane, she, her.
[105.7s] You should be looking for ghosts. Nod children, agreed.
[109.4s] And Tom Laird as Kavlaran Goldweave, he, him.
[112.2s] That totally like loosens up that whole area, right?
[115.3s] Dumbgeons and Dragons is a Patreon supported podcast and you can join today or better yet,
[120.9s] put it on your Christmas wish list because your friends and family can gift you a
[125.6s] one to 12 month membership to come join the community.
[128.8s] Find out more details at patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast slash gift for all the
[134.4s] greatest gift ideas this holiday season and now, fuck it, let's play.
[141.8s] The door chimes and Folan comes back out.
[144.7s] He doesn't have his crowd that you saw him with the other day there, Bonwyn.
[149.5s] And he comes over to your table, he says, good morning to you.
[153.9s] I don't know, I believe, Kav, we've met Alydin, yes?
[159.9s] Yes.
[160.2s] Alydin, it's a pleasure to meet you all again.
[163.4s] Apologies. I just wanted to know if you thought about my, wasn't really an offer at the point,
[171.3s] more of an ask. If you've had any consideration for it?
[175.6s] We were just kind of chatting about it. And I think no decision has been made yet.
[182.2s] I know you folks want to hit the road pretty soon.
[185.8s] Oh yeah, of course.
[187.7s] Yeah, I guess we just don't know yet. And of course, like, our fourth amigo.
[196.9s] Oh, just probably, you know, just just working.
[202.1s] I mean, Kav's probably free entirely. I don't want to speak for you, Kav.
[207.5s] Thank you. That's very kind of you. But yes, yeah, yeah, available.
[211.0s] Oh, what'd you have in mind?
[212.4s] Me and a couple of the guys, Merrick and Rudyard, are heading out into the woods.
[218.8s] We've heard rumors that there's a, it's going to sound silly, but there's a ghost elk that
[226.5s] roams the forests outside Vintersmouth. We took a little quick course with June yesterday,
[232.4s] so we felt like there was enough that the three of us at least could go out and
[236.7s] do a little initial exploring while, A, you're making your decision, and B,
[241.0s] the other folks are kind of getting the rest of their gear together.
[245.4s] Question about June's class. Was it just like Hunting 101,
[250.0s] or was it like more focused on weapons? Like, what was, what was the vibe of the class?
[254.3s] Oh, well, we did take your recommendation and go straight for the June Doe orientation.
[261.7s] Did she chop someone in the neck and they passed out? Because
[265.1s] she starts her classes like that.
[266.8s] Me.
[268.0s] Oh, wow. Yeah, that's actually, she probably said, but that's a compliment
[272.9s] because she knew that you could take it.
[274.7s] I could, I could definitely feel that. And, you know, I was, I was worried that it would,
[279.8s] that it would hurt. And, you know, there is an initial pain, but afterwards,
[283.8s] like a relaxation that comes from that.
[286.7s] Lutions up that whole area.
[288.3s] Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
[290.0s] She's pretty incredible. So ghost elk, do you, are you, forgive me, I don't know
[297.3s] a lot about ghost animals. Are you hunting it or you just want to see it? Or you?
[302.5s] Well, I mean, did you get any unfinished business? I don't know.
[307.4s] I don't know about any, anything beyond the fact that there's been rumors around
[312.7s] town that people have been seeing it. So, I mean, I don't, I'm not a big like
[319.9s] hunt for the game of hunting. Like, obviously, if we're going to hunt something,
[324.2s] it's probably not going to be a ghost in order to sustain ourselves, but we have enough in this
[328.7s] town. So I would really more just love to see it. And anything else along the way,
[335.1s] we'll do a little survival, you know, rigging up some traps, that sort of thing.
[340.5s] Of course, taking them down after, because I know, and he looks to Alydin,
[343.6s] I know the children play in, in the streets and the forest.
[347.9s] They, they would see your trap coming a mile away.
[351.5s] Oh, I'm sure, I'm sure. But also like if you caught one of them,
[354.1s] it wouldn't be the end of the world. Oh, my gosh. It'd be so funny, especially,
[359.5s] you know, if it was, if it was tally. Oh, okay. Well, maybe I don't want to be
[367.6s] in charge of catching children. Yeah, no, that's it. That's it.
[370.7s] It's like we're off topic. Yeah, I'm not trying to catch
[375.1s] a rich elderly white man coming to this town who I barely know anybody here.
[382.3s] You should be, you should be looking for ghosts, not children.
[385.9s] And are you going to catch a ghost elk? Well, that's the question. Is it actually a ghost?
[392.6s] Is it just an elk with perhaps some albino qualities? That might be an interesting find.
[399.4s] Yes. And I think you really get a kick out of Merrick and Rudger. They're,
[405.2s] I mean, Rudger, he tells a, tells a tall tale.
[409.8s] Merrick's a bit much, but he foots the bill a lot of the time. So
[415.3s] kind of helps to keep him along. He did get a lot of items from me,
[419.4s] like an excessive amount. I tried to talk him out of it. Like I don't like to
[423.5s] take advantage of people, but he, he wanted like quadruple of everything. So who am I?
[431.5s] You know, and he has, he has like the butler guy that's always with him that
[435.3s] like carries all his stuff. So I guess you'd never have to carry your own stuff.
[438.8s] What? Steuben is his butler. Yes. Yeah.
[442.0s] Do you like a caddy? Yeah, he does carry all of his, all of the,
[446.9s] all of his equipment around in what you could describe as a golf bag.
[451.9s] Yeah. Yeah. So I mean, I don't, if you've got other plans, I don't,
[455.5s] I don't worry about it. But was that, was that sort of an
[457.6s] invite for a little, well, just like into the woods adventure, you know,
[462.0s] get to know part of the crew. I know you're still making your decision on
[466.1s] whether you want to come with us or not. That could help us decide,
[469.8s] could help us decide, see, do kind of a vibe check with the crew, see how we get along.
[474.7s] Also, I just finished a bunch of big orders for you guys.
[479.1s] So I was not going to go to Everbane's today.
[483.1s] Didn't she just, no, it's fine. It's fine.
[485.7s] She can always find work. Yeah, fair.
[487.9s] Yeah. Oh yeah. There's always so much to do.
[490.3s] I mean, Zane's been taking over a lot of anyway, doesn't matter, but I can be free,
[496.4s] I guess is what I'm saying. Great.
[498.6s] And it would be nice to go to the woods for a little low stakes adventure.
[504.9s] Perfect. I would like to see a ghost elk.
[508.6s] That would, yeah. No, me too.
[510.3s] Okay. Well, I'll go grab. I mean, it does sound pretty cool.
[513.1s] I'll go grab the guys. I assume you've got to kind of gather some things,
[517.2s] but we'll maybe meet back here in an hour or so, and then head out.
[522.3s] Yeah. Spending the night, you think one night out there.
[524.9s] I mean, probably have to be out at night to find a ghost.
[527.4s] Again, I don't know a lot about what are the rules with ghosts.
[530.1s] Yeah. Well, we're going to find out, but we don't feed them after midnight
[534.7s] and don't get them wet. We'll bring enough stuff that we
[537.8s] can have. We can camp if we see something along the way and we want to come back.
[542.9s] No worries. Amazing.
[544.4s] Sounds like fun. It does sound like fun.
[546.1s] Let's do it. Yeah. Just like a little,
[548.9s] a little day trip. I love it.
[550.8s] He goes his own way to go find his friends and we,
[555.5s] we cut to an hour or so later and everybody has gathered all their gear
[561.4s] and you're heading off towards the Verboten Forest.
[565.9s] Sir Merrick Longwhisker is being followed by his caddy helper, Stupin.
[576.4s] And Merrick is very bejeweled. All of his armor is encrusted in
[583.0s] rubies and diamonds. He's a heavier set fellow who has a long handlebar mustache,
[591.5s] bit of a goatee, flaming red hair, very pale skin and
[599.5s] Rudyard Brasney, who's been introduced to you, is an even older fellow.
[606.7s] He looks like he's probably in his late 60s, early 70s,
[611.5s] has a few deep scars on his face and a couple tattoos up and down his arm.
[619.4s] And we step into a conversation, mostly driven by Rudyard at this point, as we step in.
[626.6s] Why, during the siege of Redwall Keep, I'll tell you, and he's pointing to Alydin,
[632.8s] I held the line single-handedly. 20 men against me and not a scratch did they leave.
[640.7s] It was quite the time. How did you do that?
[643.4s] Oh, well, I had this trusty sword right here and he just kind of half unsheathed an old
[652.2s] rusty sword. Not anything that Bonwyn has crafted for him. He has another dagger and
[658.5s] another long sword on his belt. So he's just carrying that 20-pound
[661.7s] sword for sentimental purposes. Just to tell this story.
[665.9s] Just to tell this story. He's committed to his bit.
[670.8s] He tells this story five times a day. Of course he does.
[674.7s] I think that's something old men do. Absolutely.
[677.3s] I have to have something on me. I think so.
[679.0s] To tell this story. Well, I had this sword and I was one
[683.5s] of the last ones there. And as he's telling this story,
[689.1s] Steuben, who's kind of walking behind everybody, kind of quickly nudges you,
[695.9s] Alydin, to fall. He's signaling you to fall back a little bit.
[701.1s] How long was that story going to be? Oh, well, just don't you worry, dear.
[706.3s] There will be 20 more similar like it. Important thing to know that Red Wallkeep
[711.9s] was in fact abandoned decades before Rudyard was even born.
[717.1s] Yes. Okay.
[719.7s] Anything he tells you, grain of salt. Grain of salt.
[724.0s] Oh, he's a liar. Yes, yes.
[726.7s] He is grand and verbose in all of his storytelling.
[731.3s] But perhaps has never even seen half of the things he said.
[735.7s] Cool. And he has all those weapons.
[739.1s] He does. Yes. He doesn't often pull them out much more than
[742.7s] look at this one and then puts them back.
[745.2s] Okay. I once stared down a troll
[749.9s] and the beast turned tail and ran.
[753.1s] It knew better than to test my steel.
[755.7s] And he again pats the sword at his side as he treks off, trying to catch up with Folan
[762.4s] and Steuben who pushes in behind you.
[765.4s] And he says he must took a drunken man in a fur coat for a troll once.
[773.1s] Well, I'm how.
[777.4s] Hey, Bonwyn.
[778.1s] Bonwyn. And she runs to catch up with Bonwyn.
[783.8s] Sorry. Sorry. You were calling me.
[787.4s] Oh, yeah. Yeah. I definitely was definitely calling you.
[791.1s] How are things going? Are you hearing some some tales back there?
[795.1s] Oh, yeah. These guys, they are great storytellers.
[802.0s] Yes. Yeah.
[803.0s] About one. I mean, he's been talking by my estimation,
[806.7s] 85 percent of the time we've been on the trail.
[810.3s] I think this might be the exact opposite of our other option of going for the academic
[818.0s] archive with the sleeping man library with all the information.
[823.8s] This one is old man fairy tale.
[829.2s] Yeah. But aren't you a little bit interested in him?
[832.8s] And I point at the at the other gentleman, his name, I can't remember, Russ.
[836.7s] I'm so sorry. Marek.
[839.0s] Sir Marek Longwhisker. Marek.
[843.3s] Quiet. Scars. What's his name?
[845.9s] I don't know, but look at all the shiny.
[847.0s] I feel like he's actually lived, you know?
[849.7s] Yeah. Those guys never tell their stories. They're like quiet and mysterious.
[855.3s] Yeah. Makes me want to know even more.
[858.0s] The ones who are always shouting their tales from the rafters.
[862.2s] Hard to believe the words they say.
[865.4s] I could be quiet and mysterious.
[868.1s] Oh, totally.
[869.1s] Marek Longwhisker steps up to you, Cav.
[872.0s] You've been, you know, rather quiet, just kind of hanging back.
[875.1s] And he gives you a nudge and says, so you've adventure much?
[881.7s] Just a little bit a couple of years ago.
[885.3s] And then just like recently have kind of picked it back up.
[888.1s] Mm. And what got you back into it?
[892.2s] Um, well, there was like a bit kidnapped.
[899.8s] There was like, remember when the monsters showed up in town?
[903.5s] That kind of that kind of spurred everything on.
[907.1s] These are the monsters in town here.
[909.8s] Well, a little while back. Yeah.
[911.4s] Oh, wow.
[912.5s] Oh, did you not hear about that?
[914.6s] Oh, well, um.
[916.5s] It was kind of like all the rage.
[918.9s] That one newspaper reporter just kept writing stories about it.
[922.6s] Wow. I don't read much.
[926.1s] Yes. No, I have I have Stuben read for me.
[929.4s] Oh, OK.
[930.5s] I mean, I personally have read at least five books, so.
[934.1s] Well, I asked Stuben to skip over anything too scary.
[937.9s] It keeps me up at night.
[939.8s] Fair.
[940.4s] Yes, yes, yes, yes.
[942.9s] Fallen here has had this grand idea to come out.
[947.5s] Adventure.
[948.5s] And I thought, well, he's a dear friend of mine.
[951.5s] I could foot the bill along the way and perhaps have some tales of my own
[956.6s] to write about and not keep me up at night.
[959.7s] I mean, I hope that you have all the tales that you could ever ever write about
[965.1s] because that sounds dope as hell.
[967.1s] Oh, well, perhaps we could have a have a have a mutual tale.
[971.5s] One that where we get rich in the end, but don't have to.
[977.8s] But don't have to fight monsters.
[980.0s] Oh, OK.
[980.7s] All right.
[981.5s] Monsters sound a bit much.
[983.4s] What about like a monster singular?
[985.8s] One singular, sensational monster.
[990.3s] OK, one monster, perhaps a smaller monster, though.
[994.6s] Oh, OK.
[995.3s] Like a little appetizer.
[996.9s] Yes.
[997.5s] Yes.
[997.9s] What do you think?
[998.4s] What what say you about that?
[1000.5s] I'd say me, yes.
[1003.2s] Real meeting of the minds we got going on here.
[1007.1s] Look, it's entirely possible Cav has gotten stupider
[1009.5s] since he has not been going to work.
[1012.4s] You know, idle.
[1013.7s] Like you use it or you lose it.
[1015.2s] So that's right.
[1015.9s] That's right.
[1017.4s] I love it.
[1018.2s] Lauren, I feel like we're two sides of the same coin.
[1021.4s] I think we're going to get along quite handily
[1023.4s] and he gives you another nudge and he's like,
[1025.1s] Stupin, I need another roll, please.
[1028.2s] It always comes together.
[1029.5s] Are you ready?
[1030.3s] Welcome to the middle.
[1031.1s] Did I take you guys?
[1032.1s] Oh, yeah.
[1033.6s] I'm trying to tell everybody.
[1035.3s] Russ, hold on a minute.
[1036.7s] We're in the middle, but first, let me tell you
[1038.4s] about this amazing video I saw where a guy makes
[1041.4s] an eyeball granny square jacket.
[1044.1s] So he makes granny squares and then crochets the eyeballs
[1047.2s] and then crochets like upper and lower eyelids
[1049.9s] and then puts it together and then made a jacket.
[1053.5s] And it was really dope.
[1054.7s] And it was really dope.
[1056.9s] But not as dope as this week's patron.
[1060.0s] Oh, oh, whoa.
[1061.2s] Threw it right to you.
[1062.6s] I really, I threw it back to you.
[1063.8s] This week's patron is Monona.
[1066.4s] Tried to get me, but I had a name.
[1068.4s] We gave you so much time.
[1070.6s] I think Monona can pull off an eyeball granny square jacket.
[1075.6s] Oh, hell yeah.
[1076.2s] Absolutely.
[1077.1s] Nobody's business that would look dope on them.
[1081.1s] Thank you.
[1081.9s] Yes.
[1083.1s] Thank you for being here.
[1084.3s] And thank you for that lovely eyeball story.
[1086.7s] Eyeball jacket sweater story.
[1088.4s] I'm going to need a picture later.
[1090.2s] Yeah, Amy can whip that up for you.
[1091.9s] No problem.
[1094.7s] I mean, I understood like 25% of what Carla was saying.
[1098.2s] So I felt like I was right there.
[1099.9s] I imagine it's like the cloak of many eyes,
[1103.1s] but made out of granny squares.
[1105.1s] Yeah, but like I don't.
[1107.1s] Or the robe of many eyes.
[1108.3s] I'll try and find something, a picture and post it.
[1111.9s] Just imagine if somebody stitched
[1113.8s] the cover of a Tool album.
[1118.3s] But whimsical.
[1119.2s] Because they're dramatic.
[1123.5s] Here, I'll tell you what.
[1124.3s] Here, I'll make this easy.
[1125.8s] Bam.
[1126.4s] Hey, speaking of gifts and joining Monona over on Patreon,
[1130.3s] patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast,
[1132.2s] because we're still in the middle.
[1135.1s] We told you about it last week,
[1136.4s] but also we'll tell you about it again this week.
[1139.4s] Patreon has this great thing where you can ask
[1142.2s] your friends and family to gift you subscription to Patreon.
[1146.8s] What?
[1147.4s] I know.
[1150.3s] Tis the holiday season.
[1151.5s] Jingle, jangle, jangle, jangle.
[1152.9s] Fill your stocking with Dumbgeons and Dragons.
[1156.6s] I don't know if there's a physical handout,
[1158.4s] but they'll figure it out.
[1159.7s] They're crafty people.
[1160.8s] I'm sure.
[1161.6s] Yeah, they can just make you something.
[1163.9s] They'll make you a fake little certificate and give it to you.
[1166.3s] A little handmade card.
[1167.9s] I do digital gifts.
[1169.5s] That would be adorable.
[1170.8s] Yes, exactly adorable.
[1172.7s] That's what we need.
[1173.8s] So patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast slash gift
[1178.7s] is the place to go or rather the place to send people
[1182.6s] that you love who love you in return
[1185.5s] and then you can join the community.
[1187.1s] And it's just all love.
[1189.9s] All love, baby.
[1190.9s] Love.
[1191.9s] Not a cult.
[1192.6s] It's all love.
[1193.1s] Not a cult.
[1196.6s] Lightly a cult.
[1198.0s] Like barely.
[1199.1s] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
[1200.6s] Just like a, yeah.
[1202.5s] Just a mutual respect to the kind of society.
[1206.1s] It's great.
[1208.4s] That's where we're gonna stop.
[1209.9s] It's time to get back to the episode.
[1211.9s] We'll talk to you later.
[1212.8s] Love you, bye.
[1213.6s] Love you, bye.
[1214.3s] Love you, bye.
[1215.0s] Love you, bye.
[1216.7s] Steuben, I need another roll, please.
[1219.8s] Like a dinner.
[1220.7s] Like he's just.
[1222.6s] Okay, all right.
[1223.3s] Okay.
[1224.0s] I was like, like a cigarette.
[1227.0s] Oh, I was like like a D20.
[1230.6s] This is very meta.
[1231.5s] What are you talking about?
[1232.6s] Oh, okay.
[1233.8s] He's just feeding him constantly.
[1236.1s] Yeah.
[1236.7s] Love it.
[1237.4s] Follin drops back to you, Bonwyn.
[1240.9s] So maybe they weren't the best of the group
[1244.7s] to perhaps sway you on,
[1246.5s] but it's who wanted to come today.
[1248.5s] That's fair.
[1249.4s] It's fair.
[1250.7s] I mean, a nice person.
[1253.9s] Just a just I guess I'm more used to like a loud banging
[1259.1s] constantly in my ears
[1260.5s] as opposed to like a yap yap yap yap yap in my ears.
[1263.8s] Yes, yes.
[1264.3s] It's just an adjustment.
[1265.6s] My brass knee.
[1266.6s] Is that what you're talking about?
[1268.3s] Absolutely.
[1270.6s] Got it right after taking a spear right through the leg.
[1274.7s] Doctors said I'd never walk again, but here I am.
[1278.7s] A miracle.
[1280.7s] Wow.
[1281.5s] Steuben quickly behind you.
[1284.6s] He slipped on wet stairs, shattered his knee,
[1287.1s] and had it replaced with a custom brace.
[1289.5s] Yeah.
[1291.7s] It's nice of you to fact check him, Steuben.
[1293.9s] I don't like him spreading so many ill truths.
[1299.8s] What's your deal, Steuben?
[1300.9s] Is this a good job?
[1301.6s] He probably pays well.
[1303.3s] Very bejeweled seems like a wealthy man.
[1305.7s] Yes.
[1305.9s] No, it pays magnificently.
[1308.0s] I just have to put up with the group.
[1310.7s] You know, one on one, they're generally okay.
[1314.2s] Once they get together, everybody starts telling stories.
[1319.1s] But they're old, right?
[1320.1s] So like, do they take a collective nap?
[1322.7s] Yes, they do.
[1324.1s] Usually about midday, which he checks his pocket watch
[1329.0s] and is like, we're coming up on it soon.
[1331.7s] And as he says that, everybody make a perception check, please.
[1337.8s] Here we go, guys.
[1340.5s] A 12, let's see.
[1342.5s] Oh, okay.
[1343.8s] I rolled a double digit right away.
[1345.5s] Like, I'm excited.
[1346.5s] Wow.
[1347.3s] That is a 10 for Cav.
[1349.3s] And a 10 for me as well.
[1351.2s] All right.
[1352.2s] You're just lulled by the tale of a-
[1354.7s] We are.
[1355.1s] We're just like-
[1356.1s] Crazy old guy.
[1356.9s] Trying to let it wash over me.
[1358.7s] Following along this path, hearing half truths and stories of old,
[1363.6s] and the path crosses over a river and you make your way down.
[1367.0s] And out of the-
[1368.0s] It's not a true fork in the road.
[1370.3s] It looks like there's a-
[1371.9s] Is it a fuck in the road?
[1373.1s] It's a fuck in the road.
[1374.2s] Exactly.
[1375.4s] There's a bit of a path that looks like has been somewhat used going off to the left.
[1381.6s] And the three of you catch out of the corner of your eye what looks like
[1385.5s] a scrap of paper that kind of is rolling down.
[1389.7s] Off the small breeze that's cutting through the trees,
[1392.3s] rolling down this path towards you.
[1394.5s] Boy, I scamper after it.
[1397.6s] Paper blowing in the wind.
[1399.9s] Child's got to chase it.
[1401.2s] Dot two.
[1401.9s] Not a child.
[1403.6s] Teenager.
[1406.3s] You're basically an adult, but still.
[1408.5s] Pretty much.
[1409.9s] Like 14 is so close to adulthood.
[1414.3s] No, it's not.
[1416.0s] I want to chase it.
[1417.4s] You zip down the path quickly.
[1420.7s] You're able to catch it.
[1422.3s] You don't need to roll anything.
[1424.3s] It kind of gets brushed up into a little shrub off to the side,
[1428.4s] and you grab it.
[1430.2s] And roll me a d20, please.
[1434.3s] There it is.
[1435.6s] Five.
[1438.4s] She's back, baby!
[1439.5s] The double digits did not last long.
[1442.3s] That 12 was a little too lofty.
[1444.4s] Yeah.
[1445.5s] It was getting too comfortable.
[1447.1s] That's right, Icarus.
[1448.3s] You just were flying towards the sun.
[1451.9s] Had to come back down to Earth, I'm sorry.
[1454.0s] You pick it up, and this is the phrase that you see on the page.
[1460.0s] Is it the phrase that pays?
[1463.8s] Just a whole range of emotions on Amy's face.
[1466.3s] I can't wait to hear it.
[1468.6s] I kind of jog back to the group, and
[1475.5s] I'm looking at this paper, and I'm reading it over.
[1479.4s] What'd you find?
[1480.3s] You know when things happen, and you're like,
[1482.7s] oh, like, that's funny.
[1486.2s] Like, we were just talking about that.
[1488.7s] Oh, I don't like that.
[1490.7s] Makes me uncomfortable a little bit when it's like,
[1493.1s] This is going to make you uncomfortable.
[1496.3s] Okay.
[1497.3s] I'm ready.
[1498.2s] So I just saw the scrap paper.
[1500.7s] Went to get it, obviously, because you never know what it could be.
[1504.6s] Like a love letter or something.
[1506.3s] It's not a love letter.
[1508.0s] It says, the archivist will fall asleep and dream the door open.
[1515.2s] See, Mike, a little, like...
[1517.5s] That's very specific and relevant to our current situation.
[1520.8s] I mean, not our current current situation.
[1522.3s] But like our overall current situation.
[1524.4s] Our overall situation.
[1525.9s] As you say that out loud, everybody collectively stops,
[1532.6s] and there's like a whisper on the wind,
[1535.1s] and you hear almost like coming in and out of a conversation,
[1539.9s] and you hear, hollow hearth, broken teeth, the book, bit back.
[1547.9s] In a voice we recognize, or just like a weird, ethereal...
[1550.9s] Weird, ethereal...
[1552.5s] Okay.
[1554.7s] What did you find there?
[1556.4s] Did anyone else hear that?
[1558.1s] Yeah, I heard that.
[1559.0s] The voice on the wind, that?
[1560.4s] Yeah.
[1561.6s] Did you, Follan, did you hear that?
[1563.7s] Yeah, I thought I heard something.
[1565.1s] Is everything okay?
[1567.0s] I don't know.
[1568.0s] I don't feel like...
[1571.4s] A danger situation, you know?
[1573.6s] Agreed.
[1574.3s] I just don't love an unearthly voice.
[1576.3s] It doesn't like...
[1577.6s] Yeah, I don't really have enough information to base things off yet.
[1581.9s] In a weirdly specific note, just randomly in the forest?
[1586.8s] In the forest.
[1587.9s] Yeah.
[1588.7s] Look down the half-trodden path where the page rustled from,
[1595.0s] and you think you hear more like rustling of paper somewhere up ahead.
[1603.6s] Oh my god.
[1606.9s] What...
[1609.5s] What's the chance that this belongs to...
[1613.6s] What's his name?
[1615.0s] Alastair?
[1615.3s] Alastair?
[1616.0s] Alastair?
[1616.9s] And he's like...
[1617.4s] Oh, he probably...
[1618.4s] Up there sleeping, and this is paper that's blown out of all this stuff.
[1621.1s] Or on his way into town.
[1622.4s] He came this way.
[1623.4s] We should maybe go look, because he had all that...
[1626.4s] You know, he was carrying that huge satchel with all those papers.
[1629.9s] Maybe it's important.
[1631.1s] Maybe he's up there, like you said.
[1633.9s] I mean, we should go look, right?
[1638.0s] Gentlemen, we're gonna go this way,
[1641.2s] because part of adventuring is following a strange clue.
[1647.6s] We call them side quests.
[1649.1s] Did I ever tell you about the time I parried a lightning bolt?
[1653.0s] Tell us all about it.
[1654.3s] As we walk this way.
[1655.0s] And then I speed walk away.
[1656.4s] Steel blade to raw magic, I tell you.
[1659.9s] The sparks were something to behold.
[1663.5s] So you quickly walk ahead.
[1665.1s] Yeah.
[1666.3s] You don't have to walk for very long, just a few minutes,
[1669.4s] and the paper rustling sound gets louder.
[1672.8s] And you cut through this cove of trees,
[1676.3s] and you stumble upon what looks like an abandoned camp.
[1681.4s] A fire that has long since been put out.
[1683.3s] No smoke or anything.
[1684.7s] Not hot to the touch.
[1685.9s] Looks like a couple turned over bedrolls.
[1690.1s] But what really stands out is fluttering up in the trees surrounding this camp
[1699.6s] are pages that look like they've been torn from a journal.
[1703.9s] Cav, can you reach those?
[1705.4s] I can't.
[1706.6s] I mean, I can get some of these ones, but.
[1708.9s] I want to climb a tree.
[1711.7s] All right.
[1712.5s] As not child children do.
[1714.6s] Yeah.
[1715.6s] Roll athletics or acrobatics with advantage because you're a child.
[1720.7s] Yeah.
[1721.1s] And I'll be trying to gather anything lower down.
[1724.0s] Sure.
[1725.1s] I'll acrobat this.
[1727.1s] That's a 13, and that's an 8.
[1730.3s] 13!
[1731.8s] Your foot slips a little bit at first,
[1733.3s] but you are able to climb the trees.
[1735.8s] It's not elegant is what you're.
[1737.3s] No, it's not.
[1738.3s] It's not as quick and nimble as you were kind of making it out to be.
[1743.1s] Maybe it's a little mossier than you thought.
[1745.3s] It was going to look really cool.
[1746.2s] Exactly.
[1746.9s] Yeah.
[1747.9s] You do have a little slip, but as you're getting up,
[1750.4s] you can reach a number of the pages at the very least.
[1754.3s] Everybody's kind of collecting them and bringing them back around.
[1757.5s] And you look down at the pages and everybody roll a d20 just for the first
[1764.1s] thing that you see.
[1765.8s] God damn it.
[1766.4s] Three.
[1766.7s] Six.
[1767.4s] Nineteen.
[1768.7s] Oh, I thought we were going to have like a three, six, nine,
[1771.5s] but then he said teen, and I was blown away.
[1775.9s] Did the dice go that high?
[1777.4s] I didn't even know that those numbers were on there.
[1780.2s] Sorry, I couldn't help it.
[1782.0s] Never seen 19 before in my life.
[1785.0s] OK.
[1785.5s] I've been rolling a d10 this whole time.
[1789.1s] I have a question.
[1789.9s] Depending on what you roll, the higher up you roll,
[1793.5s] is it like the more information that you get from what we're looking at?
[1798.6s] Or is it just random?
[1801.2s] I have them bucketed into different types of information,
[1804.9s] but no one is more important than the other at this point, perceptively.
[1809.9s] OK.
[1810.1s] What do you guys...
[1811.9s] Is the writing all the same for us?
[1814.2s] Like, and do we recognize it as...
[1818.9s] Alastair's?
[1819.8s] Alastair.
[1820.3s] I keep wanting to call him the Sandville.
[1821.6s] I don't know why.
[1823.1s] That was Cthulhu, Carla.
[1824.2s] That was Cthulhu.
[1825.1s] I know.
[1825.9s] From, yeah, from, I mean, he had lots of journals
[1829.1s] and was scrawling things down as he was talking to you.
[1831.4s] It doesn't look like his writing.
[1833.1s] OK.
[1833.7s] There are some similarities between some of the pages,
[1836.4s] but it doesn't look like it is one person's journal.
[1841.1s] OK.
[1842.3s] Well, this one, I feel like Kav, you're going to be interested in this.
[1845.4s] Listen to this.
[1846.1s] Oh, OK.
[1847.1s] Kingstown's first scribes chained their souls here,
[1851.1s] so Wintersmith might endure.
[1853.7s] You know anything about that?
[1854.6s] You're from the city.
[1856.9s] No.
[1857.5s] As you say that, that wind pipes up again.
[1862.2s] If you burn the book, it only writes itself again than you.
[1871.6s] Did anyone else feel like it kind of cut off halfway through?
[1875.5s] Yeah.
[1875.9s] Or in you, like in your body.
[1878.7s] Yeah.
[1879.2s] What did that mean?
[1881.1s] Folan's like, yeah, that didn't sound great.
[1886.2s] Do they have a fire pit?
[1888.2s] I assume they can.
[1889.9s] Yeah, yeah, it looks like it's long since been put out,
[1893.7s] but it looks like there was a fire pit, whoever used this last.
[1897.1s] When I look around there, I want to look to see if they've tried to burn pages.
[1904.2s] Pages.
[1905.1s] Yeah, there's no danger or anything.
[1907.4s] You kind of sift through the soot, and there are bits of paper in there.
[1916.1s] Long since blackened, some have kind of blown away.
[1920.4s] Nothing really remaining that you could connect to the pages
[1926.0s] that you're seeing that you've pulled from the trees.
[1928.3s] What does your stake have?
[1930.2s] Its shelves were carved from the bones of Oathbreakers.
[1935.1s] You are late.
[1936.6s] The archive already opened.
[1938.8s] You are late.
[1941.1s] Does anyone else get the feeling like we're late?
[1944.3s] Well, does that mean like did Alistair find the archive?
[1949.4s] Dude was like just asleep.
[1952.0s] Like just today?
[1953.3s] Yeah.
[1955.0s] I saw him on a bench.
[1957.0s] Wait, do you think the archive was inside him all along?
[1960.8s] Well, I don't, this piece of paper says he will walk these halls again,
[1967.9s] though ink has claimed his tongue.
[1973.1s] They chained me in the margins.
[1975.7s] I can still hear them turning the page.
[1979.9s] Someone's stuck in a book.
[1982.0s] It sure seems that way.
[1983.3s] It does seem that way.
[1984.2s] Can you get trapped in a book?
[1986.2s] Ethereal voice, are you a good guy or a bad guy?
[1989.5s] Legally, you have to tell us.
[1991.9s] It's worth a shot.
[1992.7s] That's what June says.
[1994.6s] No response.
[1995.9s] But as you're kind of pausing and looking around,
[1999.7s] everybody in the group of gentlemen with you is like stone still,
[2005.6s] even though they have weapons piling up all around them.
[2009.5s] And as you kind of relax just a moment,
[2012.9s] you hear something move in the trees behind you.
[2016.6s] You all turn and look,
[2017.8s] and you feel like you see an animal disappear off into the forest.
[2023.3s] Oh, was that, did you guys see that?
[2026.2s] Was that the ghost elk?
[2028.3s] I don't know.
[2029.4s] I just saw like rustling, like something moved over there, though.
[2032.9s] Perhaps we, do we want to take these pages or leave these pages and perhaps?
[2039.1s] I'll take them.
[2040.2s] I think we should definitely take them.
[2041.5s] We can't just leave all this litter in the forest.
[2043.9s] No, no, you're supposed to leave no trace.
[2047.2s] Leave this space and go see if we can't find that elk.
[2051.7s] And Merrick heads off into the woods.
[2054.1s] Stupid!
[2054.8s] He's nervous.
[2055.6s] I get it.
[2056.3s] I fold the pages.
[2057.2s] I put them in my bucket.
[2065.7s] Dumbgeons and Dragons Season 4 Episode 42
[2069.4s] Starring Amy More as Alydin,
[2071.9s] Carla Maxted as Bonwyn Everbane,
[2074.3s] Tom Laird as Kavlaran Goldweave,
[2076.7s] Kyle Klasset as Bizard the Wizard,
[2079.0s] and Russ More as your Dungeon Master.
[2081.4s] Dialogue Editing and Sound Design of today's episode is by Russ More.
[2085.1s] Our Community Manager is Jessica Babiuk.
[2087.6s] Music is from Epidemic Sound,
[2089.5s] and Sound Effects are from Epidemic Sound Boom Library and Sound Ideas.
[2093.7s] Our Amazing Cover Art is by Matt Garbutt.
[2096.5s] A huge thank you to our supporting producers,
[2099.0s] Gabriel Lynch,
[2099.9s] Jessica Babiuk,
[2100.9s] Angaron Kierzen,
[2102.3s] Perry Matey,
[2103.2s] Cat Waterflame,
[2104.3s] Jacob Madden,
[2105.4s] Old School Gamer D,
[2107.1s] Craig Zeiss,
[2108.0s] L.A. Branton,
[2109.1s] Chibs1012,
[2110.3s] and Kudzu828.
[2112.3s] Dumbgeons and Dragons is a Patreon-supported podcast,
[2115.6s] and all of our amazing community help make sure
[2118.1s] that we have adventures for you every single week.
[2121.5s] Come join us today, patreon.com slash dumbdragoncast.
[2124.6s] We hope to see you over there,
[2125.9s] and you have yourself,
[2128.3s] right now, a great week.
[2130.1s] Yes, and we'll talk to you very, very soon.
[2133.3s] It starts like this.
[2135.1s] I like big butts, and I cannot lie.
[2137.6s] You other brothers can't deny.
[2139.9s] The girl walks in, that's why it's taking so long.
[2142.3s] It's really long.
[2143.8s] Rambling in your face.
[2144.9s] You get feelings.
[2149.4s] Or sprung, whichever.
[2151.1s] Same, same.
[2151.9s] Dumbgeons and Dragons is a Dumb Dragons production.