[0.0s] hold still now turn around five times.
[2.1s] Dumbgeons and Dragons will start in just a second.
[9.5s] Alydin, you have your head stuck firmly into a hole deep within the tunnel system
[19.8s] that you have found under Vintersmouth.
[22.9s] been there.
[23.3s] what the tunnel systems under Vintersmouth?
[27.0s] I've been playing this wrong the whole time you guys.
[28.5s] It's been air tunnels in Amy's mind the entire time.
[33.1s] You have just stumbled across what was at first a sound, some hammering, some grumbling
[39.9s] down at the end of this tunnel which was very unusual because you haven't run into
[43.9s] anything or anyone down in these tunnels.
[47.8s] You peeled back the rubble and the debris that was around this hole and you stick your
[54.0s] head through and you now see a city underneath the ground dimly lit with goblins.
[63.0s] It's dimly lit with goblins?
[66.5s] These are glowy goblins?
[68.5s] They're incandescent goblins.
[70.5s] They're all stuck up on the wall.
[72.5s] They have a surf of bioluminescence.
[74.5s] I was just going to say.
[77.1s] In fact, their clothing is bioluminescent moss which is why it's dimly lit by goblins.
[84.1s] I've been to that rave.
[86.1s] Behind you is your dear friend Tally who's trying to pull you back saying what do you see?
[94.1s] Goblins.
[96.1s] Goblins?
[98.1s] We've got to get out of here!
[100.1s] Quiet!
[102.1s] I just want to stay a little bit longer and see what they're doing.
[106.7s] Okay.
[108.7s] Quieter.
[109.7s] Your breathing is so heavy.
[111.7s] Hold your breath down.
[113.7s] I'm sorry.
[115.7s] I'll be quieter.
[117.7s] You sit around for a moment watching and what first is quite a busy city.
[124.7s] You see a lot of goblins moving to and from different structures down below.
[129.7s] It becomes eerily quiet after a quick moment.
[136.7s] I can hear your breathing even better.
[138.7s] I thought I was holding my breath.
[142.7s] Do I see anything?
[144.7s] Did everyone just stop what they're doing and turn to look at something that isn't me?
[150.7s] Any goblin who you did see almost disappeared from view.
[155.7s] Tally, they're gone.
[157.7s] Where did they go?
[159.7s] I don't know.
[161.7s] Make a perception roll.
[163.7s] We're rolling dice, guys.
[166.4s] I didn't even roll it into the giant space I have to roll it.
[169.4s] Ooh!
[171.4s] Hold it.
[173.4s] 12.
[175.4s] You listen very intently and then you hear the sound of a pebble or a stone rolling
[182.4s] down the wall behind you.
[184.4s] I want to do one of those slow turns, you know, like the, oh no.
[191.4s] That's what I want to do.
[194.0s] You turn around and up on the walls, above where the tunnel is, you see goblins coming
[201.0s] out of different crevices surrounding you and pushing you back towards the hole that
[207.0s] you were looking in.
[210.0s] I think we should have run.
[213.0s] Dumbgeons and Dragons is a D&D 5th edition actual play podcast and I'm your dungeon
[218.0s] master Russ More, he, him.
[220.7s] Also with me today is Amy More as Alydin, she, her.
[223.7s] Are you going to eat us?
[225.7s] Nom, nom, nom, nom, nom.
[227.7s] Carla Maxted as Bonwyn Everbane, she, her.
[230.7s] They're scrappy little street kids, they don't really want to like hang out
[233.7s] waiting for adults.
[234.7s] Tom Laird as Kavlaran Goldweave, he, him.
[237.7s] That's not checking out either, so I've got more work to do still.
[240.7s] Kyle Claset as Bizard the Wizard, he, him.
[243.7s] Don't spend the night or go on an overnight adventure with him because
[247.7s] that's even worse.
[249.3s] With special guest Joe Fisher from Midnight Burger as Rinkip Selador, he, him.
[254.3s] He's invested too much of his energy in his facial hair just generally as a human being.
[259.3s] Dumbgeons and Dragons is a Patreon-supported podcast and we'd love for you to
[262.3s] join us over there.
[263.3s] Patreon.com slash Dumb Dragoncast.
[265.3s] Exclusive content, amazing community, and merch.
[268.3s] Come on over!
[269.3s] And now, fuck it, let's play!
[274.3s] Back up InVintersmouth.
[275.9s] We are in the hot block, and Bonwyn, it's been a couple days since you've returned
[281.3s] from the last adventure that you've been on.
[284.3s] There's been a lot of reflecting.
[286.3s] You and Kav and Bizarre were driven out by a creature down deep within the Mii Mountains
[295.3s] who chased you out in an epic elevator race.
[300.3s] You've returned home and Alydin wasn't there, which was the reason that you
[304.3s] originally went on this journey.
[307.3s] And you haven't seen or heard from them since.
[312.3s] Ignatius has hired basically every guard, everybody who has any authority in the town
[318.3s] to try and find Karis, which was the pseudonym that Alydin was going by.
[323.3s] Not by choice.
[325.3s] Because Ignatius decided that's what her name was.
[328.3s] That's just what my name was.
[331.3s] Also, the entire city looking for her, that's like Alydin's worst nightmare, right?
[336.3s] They're ruining everything.
[337.3s] Damn grown-ups!
[338.3s] There are signs up on mailboxes, signs up on walls with...
[343.3s] Milk cartons!
[345.3s] Milk cartons, with a poorly drawn image of Alydin.
[350.3s] In fact, so poorly drawn that Alydin has a mustache and large muscles.
[356.3s] Ignatius has no idea what this kid looks like.
[359.3s] It's me flexing my big Alydin muscles.
[361.3s] What does Bonwyn do?
[364.3s] Or what does Bonwyn want to do in this situation?
[367.3s] Because it seems like there's a bit of an affinity that you struck with Alydin
[372.3s] when they broke into your establishment.
[374.3s] Yes.
[375.3s] Wandered into to take a look at...
[378.3s] Yeah, just innocently crawled in through a tunnel.
[382.3s] I mean, whatever.
[383.3s] However you want to phrase it.
[384.3s] I mean, I am concerned, but A, happy that she didn't go on that adventure
[392.3s] because it was...
[394.3s] There was no food and it was all terrible.
[396.3s] And no riches, nothing.
[399.3s] There was no benefit.
[400.3s] So I'm glad she didn't do that.
[401.3s] I think that I am concerned about her, but not overly
[406.3s] because I know just from when we met she's very resourceful.
[410.3s] This is just like her life.
[412.3s] So I don't need to put my savior helmet on or anything.
[417.3s] I am very hopeful she will come back.
[419.3s] I'm keeping my eyes out for her.
[422.3s] I'm actively looking for her when I leave Everbane's,
[425.3s] but otherwise I am hopeful she will come back to me.
[431.3s] You find yourself later that evening down at the Brut Awakening,
[435.3s] which is the local gastropub.
[438.3s] Kavlaran is there and has been there talking to Bench
[442.3s] and Bizard enters shortly after you do.
[446.3s] And the three of you catch each other's eye
[449.3s] and Bench calls you over and says,
[452.3s] hey, Bonwyn, what can I get you?
[454.3s] You know, just like a lager.
[457.3s] Yeah.
[458.3s] Great.
[459.3s] Yeah.
[460.3s] Just something kind of refreshing, you know?
[462.3s] I can put some citrus in it.
[465.3s] That sounds great.
[466.3s] Yeah.
[467.3s] Wow.
[468.3s] You have citrus?
[469.3s] No, but I will find some.
[471.3s] Give me a moment.
[472.3s] I'll be right back.
[473.3s] No, I'll just take the lager.
[475.3s] That's perfect.
[476.3s] Thank you.
[477.3s] Yeah.
[478.3s] Yeah, absolutely.
[479.3s] He grabs a glass and then he walks out the back.
[481.3s] He'll be back in a moment.
[482.3s] Still going for that citrus.
[483.3s] What's my layout?
[484.3s] Like, are Kav and Bizard together
[487.3s] or have we all just serendipitously entered at the same time?
[492.3s] It's happened so often in D&D.
[494.3s] Bizard would probably be wanting to talk to Kav about some, you know,
[498.3s] being in, what's the title, an inquisitor?
[502.3s] Or...
[503.3s] Auditor.
[504.3s] Auditor.
[505.3s] Thank you.
[506.3s] Thank you.
[507.3s] It's so much friendlier than it is.
[508.3s] Yeah, yeah.
[509.3s] The inquisitor really sounds like I'm up to no good.
[511.3s] So I think Bizard would want to talk to an auditor
[515.3s] and get like, you know, like the inside scoop on things
[518.3s] because he did have to help his dad a little bit in Kingston
[521.3s] with some of the tax stuff and making sure the business is okay.
[524.3s] But he didn't really understand any of it.
[526.3s] He was just like, I just need to send money.
[527.3s] So I feel like we'd probably be chilling, having a drink
[530.3s] and just like chit chatting about the businesses around town
[533.3s] and what you're up to.
[535.3s] Yeah.
[536.3s] Nice.
[537.3s] Then if they're sitting together,
[538.3s] I'm going to go over when I get my drink back.
[540.3s] Hopefully that's just a beer.
[542.3s] Hey, guys.
[543.3s] Mind if I join you?
[545.3s] Oh, absolutely.
[546.3s] Grab a seat.
[547.3s] Yeah, please.
[548.3s] Nice.
[549.3s] How you guys doing?
[550.3s] Well, after our misadventure and everything,
[553.3s] you know, I got back to the shop
[556.3s] and stayed to open a couple of extra hours
[559.3s] just in case to make up for it.
[561.3s] Yeah.
[562.3s] Good call.
[563.3s] Yeah.
[564.3s] I pulled a couple of longer nights myself
[566.3s] and my goodness, did I eat.
[568.3s] I mean, I can eat.
[569.3s] Oh, I was so hungry.
[570.3s] I mean, as a government employee, I just went home.
[574.3s] They don't pay me to work off the clock.
[577.3s] I can respect that, you know.
[579.3s] Yeah.
[580.3s] Road's not taken.
[581.3s] Am I right, Bazaar?
[582.3s] Maybe.
[583.3s] Right.
[584.3s] Exactly.
[585.3s] It just wasn't in the cards for me.
[586.3s] I was born into this, but...
[588.3s] There was an opportunity to stay in Kingston,
[590.3s] but I was like,
[593.3s] no, I'm ready to leave this place.
[596.3s] I've seen the good.
[598.3s] I've seen the bad.
[599.3s] And I'm ready to see something else.
[602.3s] Well, and you had mentioned,
[603.3s] what was the school you went to again?
[605.3s] It was for like knife fighting or it was something...
[608.3s] Barnhart Swan School of Magic, Fighting and Dance.
[612.3s] Right.
[613.3s] So you were educated.
[614.3s] So it's three items, magic, fighting and dance.
[617.3s] I thought it was magic, fighting and dance.
[620.3s] Yes.
[621.3s] Some people put a comma there.
[623.3s] Some people don't.
[625.3s] It really depends on how you approach your curriculum.
[629.3s] So not magic, fighting, dance.
[632.3s] Well, see, you could do it that way, too.
[635.3s] Like the kids in the magic program
[637.3s] were fighting the dance kids is sort of what I thought.
[640.3s] Well, see, there's magic, fighting,
[642.3s] and then there's magic, fighting and dance.
[645.3s] And then there's fighting, dance.
[648.3s] Is this a Montessori school?
[650.3s] Sorry.
[651.3s] Right?
[652.3s] It's very make-your-own-thing, it seems.
[655.3s] Absolutely.
[656.3s] Whatever the kids want.
[657.3s] It's a la carte learning.
[659.3s] Just follow what's in your heart.
[661.3s] Very free form.
[663.3s] Magic, dance, fighting, sure.
[665.3s] Exactly.
[666.3s] I mean, you know, and as a as a blade singer,
[669.3s] as it's called, you kind of fall in.
[671.3s] Fall in, you get all three.
[673.3s] There's a loud crash as the door to The Brewed Awakening
[677.3s] is seemingly kicked open.
[680.3s] And Ignatius comes in and he looks distraught.
[684.3s] Ignatius is one of the nobles who runs the town brothel.
[689.3s] He comes into the center of The Brewed Awakening,
[692.3s] and everybody has stopped.
[694.3s] The band that was playing is now silent.
[697.3s] And he stands up on top of the bar.
[700.3s] My friends,
[703.3s] Charis has not turned up.
[706.3s] I fear the worst.
[708.3s] Perhaps they are dead.
[711.3s] That's the only explanation.
[713.3s] There's no record of a Charis in this town.
[717.3s] There's no way that our illustrious guard
[721.3s] could not have found her.
[724.3s] We'll have a memorial tomorrow.
[726.3s] Wow.
[728.3s] That's really fast.
[730.3s] He gave up real fast.
[731.3s] He's skipping straight to the memorial.
[733.3s] I mean, I feel...
[734.3s] Ignatius, she may have...
[736.3s] I mean, she may have just moved or...
[739.3s] Moved from Vintersmouth?
[741.3s] The jewel of Lake Lake?
[746.3s] On the River River?
[749.3s] Next to the verboten forest?
[753.3s] Does seem unlikely, doesn't it?
[755.3s] Really hitting the highlights here.
[756.3s] In the shadow of the Me Mountain?
[758.3s] In the shadow of the Me Mountains.
[761.3s] Where we just came back and didn't get any treasure, Ignatius.
[764.3s] Excuse, sorry.
[765.3s] Oh, that is the least of our worries.
[767.3s] One of our adventurers died before it even began.
[772.3s] I think it might just be easier to go along with the memorial.
[776.3s] Then maybe he'll get some closure and we can move on.
[778.3s] What do you guys...
[779.3s] Closure is important.
[780.3s] I mean...
[781.3s] Oh my god, I hope I get to go to my own funeral.
[784.3s] I hope you do.
[785.3s] I'm not gonna.
[786.3s] Let's make it happen.
[787.3s] The memorial will be held tomorrow.
[788.3s] I have invited everybody in town who know...
[792.3s] They tell great stories.
[794.3s] Everybody I met tells wonderful stories of Charis.
[798.3s] How they knew her so very well.
[801.3s] Even our former sheriff, Rinkep Sellador, who he points over to the corner where there's a...
[808.3s] Joe, if you could describe Rinkep for us as we see him now.
[813.3s] Rinkep looks...
[815.3s] He has a handlebar mustache that looks like it's seen better days, which is a metaphor for how the rest of him looks.
[825.3s] He's one of those people who seems to dress the way that he looked 20 years ago.
[830.3s] And just never got the memo.
[833.3s] And one of those people, you know, he seems to be looking around for something, but he doesn't know what it is.
[843.3s] And maybe it's his former self or something like that.
[847.3s] Or maybe his keys.
[850.3s] He's invested too much of his energy in his facial hair just generally as a human being.
[856.3s] Too much time and energy was put into it.
[860.3s] He regrets now that time that he put into the...
[865.3s] Like, if only I had focused on other things other than this mustache, then perhaps things would have worked out differently.
[874.3s] Now I'm just the sad guy at the bar.
[877.3s] You could have been the mayor.
[879.3s] Thank you. Thank you. Yes.
[883.3s] It's true.
[885.3s] I feel I've never felt worse for a character I haven't met yet.
[888.3s] Anyway, that's that. You know that guy. We all know that guy in that bar.
[892.3s] We know that guy.
[894.3s] This guy, this Rinkep Sellador, who was a former sheriff so high up in the city.
[904.3s] So high.
[905.3s] Rinkep, if you could say a few words about Karras.
[911.3s] Is this like a pre-memorial memorial, Ignatius, or what are we?
[915.3s] This is the amuse-bouche for the memorial.
[918.3s] I felt the moment.
[920.3s] Yes. I apologize.
[922.3s] We're doing it right now. This is a flash memorial is what you're saying.
[925.3s] This is a pop-up memorial.
[927.3s] Everybody invited, everybody here is the memorial now.
[933.3s] Everyone start bringing parchment out of their pockets because they've all written a little something.
[937.3s] Ignatius, you just said we are the memorial.
[940.3s] We embody the memory of Karras now.
[946.3s] Yes. I agree with you.
[949.3s] Who is Karras again? Just real quick.
[954.3s] Wait. No, no, no. Let me tell you more about what I recall about Karras.
[960.3s] First of all.
[961.3s] You scared me for a moment. Yes.
[963.3s] You know, I think we can all recall that time that Karras got lost in the cave.
[971.3s] Not good with caves. We all remember this, which is odd because where are you going to go?
[981.3s] I mean, you're in a cave. You go forwards, you go backwards.
[984.3s] It kind of seems like I'm not talking about a maze.
[988.3s] You know what I mean? You go forward, back.
[990.3s] I'm not sure how the getting lost thing happens, but it happens.
[993.3s] It happened. It happened to Karras.
[995.3s] It's happened to us all. It happens to the best of us.
[997.3s] Some people add to the best of us, the worst of us.
[999.3s] It's a universal feeling, getting lost in caves.
[1002.3s] Yeah.
[1004.3s] Cave of the mind, cave of the soul.
[1006.3s] Thank you. Thank you. The cave of the mind.
[1008.3s] We've all gotten lost in there.
[1011.3s] And it's just, you know, it makes me think of better times in the city when, you know,
[1019.3s] it was okay to get lost in caves and, you know, everybody felt fine about it.
[1025.3s] These days, not so much.
[1027.3s] I mean, don't get me started on how things used to be, right?
[1029.3s] Everybody knows that.
[1031.3s] But Karras, you know, they're getting lost in that cave up in the sky now.
[1039.3s] And here's to them, I say.
[1043.3s] Cheers.
[1045.3s] Here, here.
[1047.3s] That was so beautiful.
[1049.3s] Yes, I agree that it was beautiful. Thank you.
[1051.3s] Anybody else have any words?
[1055.3s] What can you say after that?
[1058.3s] Yeah, I really did. I really did nail it.
[1060.3s] That is true.
[1062.3s] You really brought it all.
[1065.3s] Well, I'm going to have my drink and I will, I guess, see you all tomorrow.
[1072.3s] Real quick though, this was the memorial.
[1074.3s] There's not another thing that's happening.
[1076.3s] This was it. We're just doing this.
[1078.3s] That's the memorial.
[1079.3s] Well, I mean, it felt good.
[1080.3s] Did it feel good, everybody?
[1082.3s] Yeah, I mean, you know, it was natural.
[1084.3s] It felt great.
[1085.3s] It was, and I don't want to ruin the moment.
[1087.3s] Wasn't forced.
[1089.3s] Yeah, wasn't forced was the key.
[1091.3s] Not at all.
[1093.3s] No rehearsal, no pre-written notes, just what you feel in the moment.
[1098.3s] Everybody else can reflect on that.
[1100.3s] And he sits down at the bar and slowly sips, looking off into the middle distance.
[1104.3s] He didn't actually order a drink, so whose drink is he drinking?
[1108.3s] I think that's mine. I think it's mine.
[1110.3s] That's all right, though. I'm going to have another one.
[1113.3s] You know what I mean?
[1115.3s] Mostly backwash, it's fine.
[1117.3s] When you're ready for another one anyway, so it's fine.
[1119.3s] It's quite viscous, this brew.
[1122.3s] That's on purpose. That's on purpose, don't worry.
[1124.3s] Oh, okay. Okay. Thank you.
[1126.3s] You are the professional.
[1127.3s] That's how they make it.
[1128.3s] Yeah, that's how we make it here at the Brewed Awakening.
[1131.3s] Extra saliva.
[1133.3s] Bench brings you another drink, their rink.
[1137.3s] Great.
[1138.3s] That one's on the house. That was beautiful.
[1140.3s] Thank you.
[1141.3s] I mean, you know, if you want me to talk for a drink, I can do that anytime.
[1144.3s] Are we still thinking and pondering and remembering?
[1147.3s] I'm confused about the schedule of the Flash Memorial right now, but that's okay.
[1154.3s] I think it's over.
[1155.3s] Is it?
[1156.3s] I think it wound down.
[1157.3s] I think that was...
[1158.3s] It's now over?
[1159.3s] I believe it's over.
[1160.3s] It's a literal flash.
[1162.3s] Like in a flash, it's over.
[1164.3s] So quick.
[1165.3s] Yeah.
[1166.3s] All right.
[1167.3s] I mean, it felt real though.
[1168.3s] It was quick, but it was real.
[1171.3s] Yeah.
[1172.3s] So here we all are.
[1174.3s] Yeah.
[1175.3s] And we're all the better for it.
[1176.3s] Do you want to come join us, Rinkip, or just...
[1179.3s] Oh, certainly.
[1180.3s] Certainly.
[1181.3s] That sounds lovely.
[1182.3s] Hello.
[1183.3s] Hello, all.
[1184.3s] Hello.
[1185.3s] Well, you know, bizarre, but have you met Cav Lauren?
[1187.3s] I don't think you have.
[1188.3s] I don't think I have.
[1190.3s] You're the one who went to that strange school.
[1192.3s] No.
[1193.3s] No.
[1194.3s] No.
[1195.3s] That was bizarre.
[1196.3s] That was bizarre.
[1197.3s] I'm sorry.
[1198.3s] That was bizarre.
[1199.3s] Sorry.
[1200.3s] Sorry.
[1201.3s] Sorry.
[1202.3s] I get people mixed up sometimes.
[1203.3s] I know so many people.
[1204.3s] It's hard to keep them straight in my head.
[1205.3s] You know everyone in the city, right?
[1206.3s] Except, yeah, there's this new guy.
[1208.3s] He works at...
[1209.3s] Well, I mean, I'll let you say what you do, Cav.
[1212.3s] I'm sorry.
[1213.3s] Oh, yeah.
[1214.3s] A lot of people don't realize how hard it is to know literally everyone in the
[1217.3s] city.
[1218.3s] It's hard to keep that all up in the...
[1219.3s] Of course it is.
[1220.3s] Yeah, fair.
[1221.3s] I can remember like five names at all times, and then I blank on every one.
[1224.3s] So I get you.
[1226.3s] I actually come down from Kingstown.
[1228.3s] I'm a bit of an auditor, if you will.
[1232.3s] That sounds exciting.
[1233.3s] Supposed to...
[1234.3s] Well, it isn't.
[1235.3s] Really?
[1236.3s] But, you know, they've noticed up in Kingstown that there's a little more spending going
[1241.3s] on down here than they can really account for, so they sent me down to have a look.
[1246.3s] Okay.
[1247.3s] Where do you think the spending's coming from exactly?
[1249.3s] Where's the...
[1250.3s] Oh, City Hall.
[1251.3s] Yeah, absolutely.
[1252.3s] Oh, City Hall.
[1253.3s] Yeah.
[1254.3s] The mayor.
[1255.3s] Expressly the mayor.
[1256.3s] Expressly the mayor.
[1258.3s] So you're done.
[1259.3s] I guess you know where the spending is coming from.
[1262.3s] So you're headed back now?
[1263.3s] Well, I haven't been able to prove it yet.
[1266.3s] Oh, proof.
[1267.3s] That's interesting.
[1268.3s] Yeah, they require me to do that as well.
[1270.3s] I didn't.
[1271.3s] I never did any of that when I was sheriff.
[1272.3s] Working on that part.
[1273.3s] Okay, proof.
[1274.3s] Okay.
[1275.3s] Well, maybe that's...
[1276.3s] I mean, I hate to overstep, but maybe that's why you're not sheriff anymore.
[1278.3s] Well, we can go...
[1279.3s] I mean, that's a long conversation to have if you really want to get into it.
[1282.3s] Listen, proof is an interesting...
[1284.3s] Because what is proof, really?
[1285.3s] I mean, you say something, I say something.
[1288.3s] Who do you believe?
[1289.3s] I say you go with the guy who has the mustache.
[1292.3s] And that's what I did when I was sheriff.
[1295.3s] And it worked out fine for a very long time.
[1298.3s] You know?
[1299.3s] Yeah, that's just a good strategy.
[1301.3s] My ironclad record.
[1303.3s] Let me ask you this.
[1304.3s] Where do you get proof of the spending?
[1308.3s] Well, it's really tedious.
[1310.3s] I have to go through a bunch of forms and a bunch of receipts and make sure that they match.
[1316.3s] And I haven't found anything yet that indicates they're not going to...
[1322.3s] But I will, I will.
[1323.3s] I'm going to stick with it.
[1324.3s] I'm going to find that evidence.
[1326.3s] I'll prove it.
[1327.3s] Everyone will know.
[1328.3s] I mean, the gold fountains, the gold...
[1330.3s] Like, the gold everything.
[1331.3s] The gold everything.
[1332.3s] Over in the noble side of the river.
[1334.3s] I mean, that money's coming from somewhere, right?
[1337.3s] And it's not filtering over to our side of the city.
[1342.3s] I mean, the very high taxes could be an explanation, but that's not checking out either.
[1347.3s] So I've got more work to do.
[1349.3s] Interesting.
[1350.3s] It sounds thrilling, is what it sounds like.
[1353.3s] You know what?
[1354.3s] Here's the thing.
[1355.3s] Thank you.
[1356.3s] I mean, I'm not saying I did this back in the day when I was the sheriff.
[1359.3s] But sometimes there would be like a set of records.
[1363.3s] And then there'd like be, you know, the other set of records.
[1367.3s] You know what I'm saying?
[1368.3s] See, I'm currently looking for the other set of records.
[1372.3s] I mean, you didn't hear that from me.
[1374.3s] What do I know?
[1375.3s] Right?
[1376.3s] But I'm just saying, I'm just theoretically, if I were to do that, that may be something that has happened once or twice from someone who was definitely not me.
[1388.3s] Right?
[1389.3s] That's definitely not something I did.
[1391.3s] I've just heard that maybe it's like that.
[1394.3s] So take that.
[1395.3s] Take whatever you take, however you that however you like to take it.
[1399.3s] You know, I mean, I will take it.
[1403.3s] Great.
[1406.3s] You talk in circles, don't you?
[1409.3s] Well, you know, it stays neat and tidy that way, doesn't it?
[1412.3s] Because, I mean, otherwise I'm just going off in one direction and nobody wants that.
[1416.3s] No, that's true.
[1418.3s] I'm lost in a cave, though, doing that much.
[1421.3s] I should have had you along on that adventure, perhaps.
[1424.3s] Perhaps Charis would have been there, too.
[1428.3s] Ignatius goes back to the middle distance.
[1430.3s] Is he staring off in the middle distance again?
[1432.3s] Yeah.
[1433.3s] Does this happen a lot?
[1434.3s] This happens a lot.
[1435.3s] Just don't spin the night or go on an overnight adventure with him.
[1439.3s] Yeah, I definitely do not.
[1441.3s] No overnights?
[1442.3s] No overnights.
[1443.3s] No overnights.
[1444.3s] Unless you have earplugs.
[1445.3s] Maybe because of, yes, if only because of the night terrors.
[1448.3s] Well, night terrors.
[1449.3s] They're really something.
[1450.3s] Wow.
[1451.3s] Oh, and it's nonstop.
[1452.3s] Yeah.
[1453.3s] Nonstop night terrors.
[1454.3s] Yeah.
[1455.3s] Yeah.
[1456.3s] Okay.
[1457.3s] Well, that's, I feel like there's some sort of salve for that or something.
[1460.3s] Is there no cure for night terrors?
[1462.3s] What do you got to do?
[1463.3s] You got to tie them up at night or something?
[1464.3s] Is that what happens?
[1465.3s] Well, we didn't, we kind of, it didn't help.
[1468.3s] There was still a lot of screaming and scratching.
[1471.3s] Oh, the screaming.
[1472.3s] Yeah, yeah, the screaming is what gets you.
[1474.3s] You have to hold them down like hands and feet.
[1477.3s] Right.
[1478.3s] Uh-huh.
[1479.3s] What about one of those cone of silence spells?
[1482.3s] You know what I mean?
[1483.3s] Boom.
[1484.3s] If only.
[1485.3s] Sleep like a baby.
[1486.3s] That is.
[1487.3s] That would be a good call.
[1489.3s] Kind of taxing, but it would do it.
[1492.3s] I don't know if it's worth it to cast it every night though.
[1495.3s] Yeah.
[1496.3s] But I digress.
[1497.3s] Sorry, speaking of taxing, you're looking for the taxes.
[1499.3s] Hey, see how I brought it around?
[1501.3s] I talk in circles and I bring it back around.
[1503.3s] Perfectly done.
[1504.3s] Yeah.
[1505.3s] Love it.
[1506.3s] Great.
[1507.3s] Wow.
[1508.3s] We'll be right back.
[1511.3s] It's the middle.
[1512.3s] Okay.
[1513.3s] It's the middle.
[1514.3s] We kicked Russ out.
[1515.3s] Yep.
[1516.3s] He's gone.
[1517.3s] Secret middle.
[1518.3s] So.
[1519.3s] Let's talk about him.
[1520.3s] We did not discuss at all what we were going to talk about.
[1522.3s] So yeah, let's talk about Russ.
[1523.3s] Yeah.
[1524.3s] Good guy.
[1525.3s] Yeah.
[1526.3s] Yeah.
[1527.3s] He worked so hard.
[1528.3s] He's one of the best people I've ever worked with in like a job situation.
[1531.3s] Absolutely.
[1532.3s] Just the best.
[1533.3s] So calm, always so organized.
[1535.3s] On top of everything.
[1536.3s] On top of everything all the time.
[1539.3s] A dream to work with.
[1541.3s] When I was hiring him, I called his last boss and she was like, I know this is
[1544.3s] going to sound like a lie, but Russ is like the best person I've ever worked
[1548.3s] with.
[1549.3s] And it wasn't a lie.
[1551.3s] You might not even believe that I'm his boss.
[1553.3s] I could just be some random person he told you to call.
[1555.3s] Cross my mind.
[1558.3s] What's wild too is that like he he does all of this whilst maintaining like
[1564.3s] mental stability.
[1566.3s] Yes.
[1567.3s] That is truly impressive.
[1568.3s] That is one of the most amazing things to me.
[1572.3s] Oh, wow.
[1573.3s] As not a neurotypical, he's very confusing to me.
[1578.3s] And I'm so glad that he is mine.
[1581.3s] As someone who's been like juggling a lot with work lately, I do not feel
[1585.3s] like I'm, you know, at a hundred percent in like all the other areas of my
[1590.3s] life.
[1591.3s] So yeah, I need like some sort of crash course on like how to do this.
[1595.3s] Right.
[1596.3s] Is this turning into a better help?
[1598.3s] He needs to make me a PowerPoint, but about lives.
[1601.3s] Not a sponsor.
[1602.3s] Not a sponsor.
[1603.3s] Anyway, Middle, what do we normally talk about other than Russ?
[1607.3s] Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast.
[1610.3s] You can join us over there for fun stuff like a ton of extra content and book
[1615.3s] club and extra discord channels.
[1617.3s] You don't have to be a patron to come on our discord, though.
[1620.3s] Get on over there.
[1621.3s] Episode dedication as well.
[1623.3s] And an episode dedication.
[1625.3s] This episode is dedicated to Tyler Ponder.
[1629.3s] Thanks, Tyler.
[1630.3s] You're amazing.
[1631.3s] That is too awesome.
[1633.3s] That was Russ.
[1634.3s] Fun fact.
[1635.3s] Pondering something is named after Tyler.
[1638.3s] There it is.
[1639.3s] Hmm.
[1640.3s] Ponder that.
[1641.3s] Guys, we're killing this.
[1642.3s] Okay.
[1643.3s] Let's get back to the episode because it's a really super fun one.
[1646.3s] Joe, Midnight Burger.
[1648.3s] The man's a genius.
[1650.3s] Just the quality, dude.
[1651.3s] Yeah.
[1652.3s] If you haven't listened to Midnight Burger, do it.
[1654.3s] What are you doing?
[1655.3s] We'll finish listening to this.
[1656.3s] And then go listen to Joe.
[1658.3s] Just go download the first episode and then afterwards listen to it.
[1663.3s] Exactly.
[1664.3s] Okay.
[1665.3s] Easy.
[1666.3s] All right.
[1667.3s] Let's go back.
[1668.3s] Bye.
[1669.3s] Bye.
[1670.3s] You hear some calls from the street.
[1675.3s] Street calls.
[1676.3s] Very faint, high, like a high-pitched voice.
[1679.3s] Bonwyn?
[1680.3s] Bonwyn?
[1681.3s] Bonwyn?
[1682.3s] You guys hear that?
[1684.3s] I hear something, yeah.
[1686.3s] Yeah.
[1687.3s] Very high-pitched.
[1688.3s] Are you Bonwyn?
[1689.3s] How about you?
[1690.3s] Are you Bonwyn?
[1691.3s] Do you have tiny people searching for you or something like that?
[1695.3s] Is there?
[1696.3s] Is there a Bonwyn?
[1697.3s] Nothing.
[1698.3s] I'll be right back.
[1699.3s] Very young people.
[1700.3s] All right.
[1701.3s] You head out and there are two children.
[1704.3s] One boy, one girl.
[1705.3s] Calling to, just going up to everybody they see.
[1708.3s] Are you Bonwyn?
[1710.3s] Maybe you?
[1711.3s] Could you be Bonwyn?
[1713.3s] I am Bonwyn.
[1715.3s] I could be and I am.
[1717.3s] Oh, hi.
[1718.3s] Hi, hi, hi.
[1719.3s] Hi, hi, hi.
[1720.3s] We have an emergency.
[1727.3s] Days ago, Alydin went into the tunnels and they said if they ever said if they don't
[1735.3s] come back that maybe Bonwyn could help.
[1737.3s] They left this note and said, find Bonwyn.
[1739.3s] If I don't come back, then they didn't come back.
[1743.3s] And problem, we didn't know who you were.
[1748.3s] So now we know who you are and now we're telling you what Alydin and Tali told us
[1754.3s] to tell you is that they are missing.
[1756.3s] Okay.
[1757.3s] And you said that was several days ago?
[1758.3s] Yeah.
[1759.3s] They were supposed to go on an adventure, but they wanted to go check something out
[1762.3s] down in the tunnels because they were really they've been really invested in just
[1766.3s] hanging out in the tunnels and not interacting with anybody else ever.
[1772.3s] Okay.
[1773.3s] What are your names?
[1774.3s] I'm Wallace and this is Dietra.
[1777.3s] Hi, Wallace.
[1778.3s] Hi, Dietra.
[1779.3s] Bonwyn.
[1780.3s] Could you thank you for finding me.
[1784.3s] Could you just stay right here just for just for a minute.
[1788.3s] I'm going to see if maybe I'm going to come and help help find Alydin and Tali
[1794.3s] is with her.
[1795.3s] Tali went with her.
[1797.3s] Okay.
[1798.3s] I'm just going to I'll be right back.
[1800.3s] Please just stay right here.
[1802.3s] Okay.
[1803.3s] Okay.
[1804.3s] Right here.
[1805.3s] Right.
[1806.3s] Just right.
[1807.3s] Yeah.
[1808.3s] Great.
[1809.3s] Okay.
[1810.3s] You see them kind of slow sidestepping as you start to walk away.
[1812.3s] Okay.
[1813.3s] If you could just put your hand right here on the side of this building and just
[1816.3s] keep that those hands right there.
[1818.3s] Roger that.
[1819.3s] That'd be perfect.
[1820.3s] Got it.
[1821.3s] I'm going to go back in to Brewed Awakening.
[1826.3s] Hey, guys.
[1829.3s] No pressure.
[1830.3s] But Alydin, you know, Charis is missing.
[1839.3s] She's in some tunnels that are under the city.
[1841.3s] And I'm going to go try and find her because I'm pretty worried because
[1844.3s] she's been missing since the day we were all supposed to go on our
[1846.3s] adventure.
[1849.3s] So if anybody wanted to come and maybe help because I have no idea
[1852.3s] what's in those tunnels, that would be amazing.
[1855.3s] But again, no pressure.
[1857.3s] I'm also happy.
[1858.3s] Just go on my own.
[1859.3s] Totally in business is closed.
[1862.3s] So sure.
[1864.3s] Amazing.
[1865.3s] It sounds like a sounds like a good time.
[1867.3s] How many axes do you guys have?
[1868.3s] Do you guys have enough axes?
[1870.3s] I don't have any.
[1871.3s] I do not have an axe on me.
[1874.3s] Do you have a little weird?
[1875.3s] I mean, I have four.
[1876.3s] So I think we're covered.
[1878.3s] Perfect.
[1879.3s] Great.
[1880.3s] Wow.
[1881.3s] Thank you.
[1882.3s] You were ready for this adventure.
[1883.3s] Thank you.
[1884.3s] Yeah.
[1885.3s] So we're covered.
[1886.3s] Check that off the list.
[1887.3s] What else do we need?
[1888.3s] We're going right now.
[1889.3s] I think we can probably just go.
[1890.3s] Let's just go.
[1891.3s] Right.
[1892.3s] That sounds great.
[1893.3s] Let's do that.
[1894.3s] Great.
[1895.3s] First question.
[1896.3s] Where and how do we get there?
[1897.3s] Oh, great question.
[1899.3s] So there should be some children outside that will hopefully show us the way
[1903.3s] Alydin goes in, but I'm not entirely counting on that.
[1906.3s] They're, you know, these kids, they're scrappy little street kids.
[1910.3s] They don't really want to like hang out waiting for adults.
[1913.3s] That's plan A.
[1915.3s] Plan B is that there is an entrance to those tunnels at Everbane's,
[1921.3s] which is how I met Alydin because she, you know, was exploring one night.
[1927.3s] So we have a couple options.
[1928.3s] I'm just going to cross my fingers that the children are still there.
[1933.3s] The children still there?
[1934.3s] You want to roll a D20?
[1935.3s] High, they're still there.
[1936.3s] Low, they're not.
[1939.3s] It's a 13.
[1940.3s] Oh, they're still there.
[1942.3s] They have moved down several houses though.
[1944.3s] Hands still on the wall or several buildings.
[1948.3s] We kept our hands on.
[1950.3s] You did.
[1951.3s] Technically that is just a row of, so you are still technically.
[1956.3s] Anyway, my friends and I are here.
[1959.3s] Here we come.
[1960.3s] We're going to come help.
[1962.3s] But we do need you to show us how they get into the tunnel.
[1966.3s] Right.
[1968.3s] Okay.
[1969.3s] So Alydin told us to come get you if they get lost.
[1972.3s] But Alydin has also told us to never show anybody where we live.
[1978.3s] Okay.
[1979.3s] So the entrance is where you live.
[1981.3s] Oh shoot.
[1984.3s] No.
[1987.3s] Okay.
[1988.3s] Yes.
[1989.3s] No.
[1990.3s] Yes.
[1991.3s] Teacher, what do we do?
[1994.3s] Just tell her where we live.
[1996.3s] Just tell her where we live?
[1997.3s] Just tell her it's for Alydin.
[1999.3s] Okay.
[2000.3s] Okay.
[2001.3s] Okay.
[2002.3s] I used to be the sheriff.
[2003.3s] Oh, you used to be the sheriff.
[2004.3s] Look at this mustache.
[2005.3s] Which means I'm trustworthy.
[2006.3s] Look at his mustache.
[2007.3s] He is trustworthy.
[2008.3s] He used to.
[2009.3s] Yeah.
[2010.3s] I mean do you see this is.
[2011.3s] The mustache alone.
[2012.3s] The mustache.
[2013.3s] I trust everybody implicitly with the mustache.
[2016.3s] As well you should.
[2017.3s] Yes.
[2018.3s] Not enough of that going around.
[2020.3s] So good job kids.
[2021.3s] It's what kids need to know is that mustaches equal trust and protection.
[2026.3s] Absolutely.
[2027.3s] And always have.
[2028.3s] So please.
[2029.3s] Always.
[2030.3s] Okay.
[2031.3s] Okay.
[2032.3s] Okay.
[2033.3s] Okay.
[2034.3s] So can we take our hands.
[2035.3s] Can we take our hands off the wall?
[2036.3s] You can take your hands off the wall and we are just going to follow you.
[2037.3s] Okay.
[2038.3s] Keep up.
[2039.3s] And they run off.
[2040.3s] Okay.
[2041.3s] Everybody else.
[2042.3s] Chasing behind.
[2043.3s] It's your own pace.
[2044.3s] We.
[2045.3s] Cut to back down to the tunnels.
[2048.3s] Oh my God.
[2049.3s] I am nervous.
[2050.3s] I am.
[2051.3s] I am.
[2052.3s] I am.
[2053.3s] I am.
[2054.3s] I am.
[2055.3s] I am.
[2056.3s] I am.
[2057.3s] So we are going to back down to the tunnels.
[2058.3s] Oh my God.
[2059.3s] I am in this episode.
[2060.3s] You are in this episode.
[2061.3s] All right.
[2062.3s] Okay.
[2063.3s] Alladin you have been placed inside of a very crudely built cage.
[2073.9s] You have were surrounded by these goblins and because there were so many of them
[2080.2s] you didn't really put up a fight.
[2083.7s] They led you at spear point back down into the into the city and put you in this cave
[2090.0s] which is right beside some smoldering embers in a fire.
[2095.1s] There's you and there's tally and there's two goblin guards.
[2098.1s] They put me in a cage.
[2100.1s] Cage.
[2101.1s] Okay.
[2102.1s] Is the word that I think I said.
[2103.1s] Yeah.
[2104.1s] Cave was the second one and I was like hold on is it a cage in a cave?
[2107.6s] Cage.
[2108.6s] Cage.
[2109.6s] Cage.
[2110.6s] Cage.
[2111.6s] Look at all those cuttings.
[2112.9s] We know it says cave once and we're all like it's a cave.
[2117.9s] There are caves in the tunnels.
[2119.5s] It's tunnel system which means there are multiple caves.
[2122.4s] Tunnel is just many caves.
[2124.8s] And you can write that down kids.
[2127.4s] That's science.
[2128.4s] Alladin what do we do?
[2130.2s] Shh I'm thinking.
[2131.6s] Okay.
[2132.6s] Are they going to eat us?
[2135.6s] What?
[2136.6s] No.
[2137.6s] Why?
[2138.6s] Well.
[2139.6s] Prop.
[2140.6s] No.
[2142.5s] Well.
[2143.5s] Should we ask them?
[2144.5s] Well I mean like yeah sure.
[2146.9s] Yeah.
[2147.9s] Hey.
[2148.9s] Hey.
[2149.9s] Excuse me.
[2150.9s] One of the goblins turns around.
[2151.9s] Comes over to you.
[2155.0s] Our big gestures.
[2156.7s] Are you going to eat us?
[2158.4s] Nom nom nom nom nom.
[2159.4s] And I point to me and tell us.
[2163.6s] They look at each other.
[2165.0s] Nom nom nom.
[2167.0s] Us.
[2168.0s] Are you going to.
[2169.0s] Nom nom nom nom.
[2170.0s] Us.
[2171.9s] They turn around and go over to a table.
[2178.4s] And they pick something up off the table and they look at each other.
[2181.2s] It's Google Translate isn't it?
[2184.6s] And they throw it into your cage.
[2189.5s] And rolling towards you is this moldy piece of bread.
[2193.4s] That one's all yours Tali.
[2195.9s] Oh great.
[2196.9s] I don't know.
[2198.4s] I don't know.
[2199.4s] I don't know if they're going to feed us if we're going to eat us.
[2202.8s] Well yeah I mean I don't know if they maybe they didn't understand.
[2207.0s] Oh no I think they think that we're hungry.
[2209.1s] Oh they think that we're hungry.
[2210.1s] What if we pretend that we're going to eat them?
[2212.5s] Okay.
[2213.5s] Yeah.
[2214.5s] Okay I'll follow your lead on that one.
[2215.5s] Because I was kind of scared.
[2216.5s] Yeah.
[2217.5s] Right?
[2218.5s] We are in the cage.
[2219.5s] I wasn't.
[2220.5s] Well that's what they think.
[2221.5s] Okay.
[2222.5s] Maybe we can convince them that they are in the cage?
[2225.4s] Yeah.
[2226.9s] Aren't we all in the cage?
[2227.9s] No this has fallen apart already.
[2228.9s] A lot of cage and cave work today.
[2231.9s] A lot of inner cage, inner cave.
[2234.2s] We just swapped the G for the V.
[2236.2s] Yeah.
[2237.2s] It's just.
[2238.2s] Cave of the mind, cage of the mind.
[2239.2s] Okay I don't think that's going to work.
[2240.4s] We have to scrap that plan.
[2241.4s] Okay do you have anything in your bucket that can get us out of this?
[2243.6s] Yes.
[2244.6s] I was just going to say they didn't take my bucket and I'm just rummaging through
[2248.7s] my bucket and I come out with a little flat head screwdriver.
[2253.4s] Okay.
[2254.4s] I'm like alright.
[2255.5s] Okay.
[2256.5s] So.
[2257.5s] What do we do with that?
[2258.5s] It's got a pointy end on it.
[2259.5s] Great.
[2260.5s] This thing is.
[2261.5s] We're going to stab them.
[2263.0s] Oh my god Tally.
[2268.1s] It seemed like the next best thing to do.
[2270.0s] My god.
[2271.0s] If we stab them through the cage.
[2274.0s] We're still in the cage.
[2275.0s] They're just going to keep us here.
[2276.0s] And then we're murderers?
[2277.0s] We don't.
[2278.0s] They just tried to feed.
[2279.0s] Like that was gross.
[2280.0s] But they just tried to feed us something.
[2281.0s] No I was thinking.
[2282.6s] This is how this cage is just held together with like sticks and twine and stuff.
[2285.7s] Yeah.
[2286.7s] I was just thinking I could use a sharp end of this and just kind of.
[2290.1s] On the end of the.
[2291.1s] On the rope.
[2292.1s] Okay.
[2293.1s] Okay.
[2294.1s] But you need to make a distraction because there's nothing else in here and that's
[2297.8s] going to be really obvious.
[2298.8s] So you got to like talk loud.
[2300.3s] Okay.
[2301.3s] Maybe like sing or something.
[2303.3s] In the arms of an angel.
[2307.3s] That's not what I was expecting.
[2311.1s] You're doing great.
[2316.1s] Keep going.
[2317.1s] Canadian Queen.
[2318.1s] You don't know any more words to that do you?
[2322.2s] Well no at this point the narrator's cut in and do you see these two children in
[2326.2s] a cage?
[2327.2s] For just five dollars a cup of coffee a day.
[2334.1s] They're living off of moldy rolls.
[2336.3s] You can change their life.
[2339.6s] You can buy these goblins ear muffs.
[2344.9s] Let's see if they're if the goblins are distracted.
[2349.4s] The goblins are they take a few steps away.
[2355.5s] They look over and they're very confused and they take a few steps away and they
[2359.3s] begin talking to each other looking over every now and again but not enough that
[2362.6s] they're really paying attention to you.
[2364.5s] So it seems to be working.
[2366.6s] So I'm at the bottom corner and I am just like scraping the end the sharp end of the
[2373.1s] screwdriver against the rope to fray it and try to like you know just it's not super
[2381.7s] sturdy.
[2382.7s] Oh my god Tally do you think we could just pick this thing up and like walk with
[2385.3s] it?
[2386.3s] My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard and they're like it's better than yours
[2392.2s] damn right it's better than yours.
[2395.5s] Sorry what?
[2397.5s] You're doing a great job.
[2398.5s] Thanks.
[2399.5s] Do you think we just like pick this up and like walk with it?
[2402.5s] And move it.
[2403.5s] A little bit because it's like it's not big.
[2405.5s] Sure.
[2406.5s] This is like a this by this.
[2408.1s] Okay.
[2409.1s] Okay.
[2410.1s] Got it.
[2411.1s] Okay.
[2412.1s] So we're gonna be real nonchAlydint about it.
[2414.5s] Okay.
[2415.5s] So should I keep singing?
[2416.5s] No.
[2417.5s] Oh because I had a real good one next but that's okay I'll I'll get it next
[2420.7s] time.
[2421.7s] I'll get it next time.
[2422.7s] Okay.
[2423.7s] So we're gonna be cool and just like lean up against the bars on one side.
[2428.1s] Yeah.
[2429.1s] And you're gonna grab it.
[2430.1s] Got it.
[2431.1s] And then you're gonna like just like grab it low like bend your knees.
[2434.2s] Bend your knees?
[2435.2s] I got a little sully there for a second sorry you guys.
[2438.2s] I'm bending my knees.
[2441.2s] Bend your knees.
[2442.2s] Yeah.
[2443.2s] Can't get out of it.
[2444.2s] And then we're gonna stand up and just we're gonna lift it like this much.
[2448.6s] Just that just a little bit.
[2449.6s] A teeny tiny bit and we're gonna go to the left.
[2452.6s] To the left.
[2454.6s] That was the song I was gonna sing.
[2455.6s] Sorry.
[2456.6s] You can hum it while we do it ready.
[2459.6s] Okay.
[2460.6s] Three.
[2461.6s] Two.
[2462.6s] One.
[2463.6s] Are they seriously gonna like horse costume this cage right out of the cave?
[2466.6s] Is that what's happening?
[2467.6s] Three two one.
[2468.6s] Like is it easy to lift can we just like.
[2469.6s] Oh yeah it's very easy to lift.
[2470.6s] Okay cool.
[2471.6s] Oh I'm sorry this isn't a roll.
[2472.6s] I need you to roll to see if the children are still there.
[2473.6s] These little spears.
[2474.6s] It doesn't look like a cage.
[2475.6s] I'm scared of my pinky.
[2476.6s] Okay I love it.
[2477.6s] You can roll stealth.
[2478.6s] Aw damn it Carla you ruined everything.
[2480.5s] I got that one good fourteen in there and the rest is just gonna be.
[2485.5s] Tally did roll a twenty.
[2486.5s] All right well that was a two.
[2487.5s] Oh wow.
[2488.5s] Well Tally has to roll two right?
[2489.5s] Maybe Tally crushes it.
[2490.5s] One and two.
[2491.5s] Eighteen.
[2492.5s] You're rolling with my dice.
[2493.5s] Well.
[2494.5s] All right so it's like this.
[2495.5s] And my side's just dragging a little bit I guess.
[2498.5s] So yeah Tally lifts theirs.
[2499.5s] You're rolling with my dice.
[2500.5s] Well.
[2501.5s] All right.
[2502.5s] So it's like this.
[2503.5s] And my side's just dragging a little bit I guess.
[2509.5s] Tally lifts theirs and you lift yours and then Trip and the cage scrapes along the floor.
[2518.9s] Tally continues to walk there on the other side and the cage begins to crumple upon itself.
[2524.8s] The two goblins look over at you and they start to walk over and pick the cage back
[2531.2s] up and are securing it back down to the ground over top.
[2535.6s] Thank you.
[2536.6s] It fell over.
[2537.6s] I'm surprised that didn't work.
[2539.1s] Wow.
[2540.1s] I mean.
[2541.1s] Seemed like a perfect play.
[2542.1s] I mean it could have worked if Carla didn't say I had to roll for it.
[2544.9s] Damn Carla.
[2545.9s] It's my fault.
[2546.9s] I made that not work.
[2547.9s] I'm sorry.
[2549.4s] We cut back up to the stables where the two children have run off.
[2553.1s] Come get me.
[2554.1s] Where you've been able to follow them to.
[2558.3s] You're all you know varying degrees of out of breath depending on your level of
[2563.4s] athletic prowess.
[2566.0s] When you arrive and they get there and they're like OK.
[2569.4s] So this is where we live.
[2571.2s] Don't tell anybody.
[2572.2s] Otherwise we're going to be in a lot of trouble with Alydin.
[2574.1s] OK.
[2575.1s] I'm looking at you all.
[2576.1s] Take it to the grave.
[2577.1s] I take it to the grave.
[2578.1s] I've already forgot.
[2579.1s] Yeah.
[2580.1s] Don't even worry about it.
[2581.1s] Good.
[2582.1s] Where do you live again?
[2583.1s] Thank you.
[2584.1s] Yeah.
[2585.1s] So many people know that one.
[2586.1s] That's good.
[2587.1s] OK.
[2588.1s] The hole to get in is down in the storage place down here and they lead you down
[2592.6s] this little ladder down into this old cold storage area and they lead you to this little
[2599.3s] tunnel entrance and they say it's right here.
[2601.7s] They went.
[2602.7s] They go in there.
[2603.7s] We see the light for a little bit and then it disappears and then some time later they
[2607.3s] come back.
[2608.3s] So if you normally watch when they leave did you see.
[2612.1s] Which direction?
[2613.1s] Yes.
[2614.1s] In.
[2615.1s] Just in.
[2616.1s] OK.
[2617.1s] I guess that's the only direction really.
[2618.1s] OK.
[2619.1s] That there is.
[2620.2s] We've got a real tunnel cave kind of conundrum here.
[2625.5s] I guess Alydin didn't like leave notes about where she was exploring or anything probably
[2631.0s] because poor child can't read.
[2634.2s] Well she did leave numbers on the floor.
[2638.6s] OK.
[2639.6s] OK.
[2640.6s] So you know numbers.
[2641.6s] Good.
[2642.6s] Good job kids.
[2643.6s] Thank you.
[2644.6s] Thank you.
[2645.6s] The numbers are upstairs and they zip back upstairs and anybody who.
[2650.0s] Does follow them.
[2651.6s] There looks to be a drawing on the ground of what looks like a tunnel system with numbers
[2662.2s] at each egg what are presumably each entrance and exit.
[2667.6s] So this is so we have like a rough map like this is this is all the places that
[2671.9s] they've been and then they said they were going to go this other way that Alydin
[2678.7s] said leads out of town because they'd seen all the other places that they were able to
[2683.8s] find.
[2684.8s] OK.
[2685.8s] OK.
[2686.8s] That's actually extremely helpful.
[2688.8s] So we'll just go down and go that way and then I'm sure we'll find her.
[2693.5s] I'm sure she's fine.
[2694.5s] Absolutely.
[2695.5s] I'm sure they are fine.
[2696.8s] Tally's fine.
[2697.8s] Thank you.
[2698.8s] Yes.
[2699.8s] Everything's OK.
[2700.8s] We're great kids.
[2701.8s] Great.
[2702.8s] We have four axes with us.
[2703.8s] So I think we're going to be.
[2704.8s] Yeah.
[2705.8s] All right.
[2706.8s] Wow.
[2707.8s] Absolutely not.
[2710.0s] I can't even see them.
[2711.0s] No, you can't even see them.
[2712.0s] No.
[2713.0s] No.
[2714.0s] From all the way over here.
[2715.0s] And I take two steps back.
[2716.0s] You only see the axes if it's the last thing you ever see.
[2718.7s] That's when you see the axes.
[2719.7s] Oh.
[2720.7s] That's scary.
[2723.7s] I trust his mustache.
[2725.7s] I'm not trying to scare you.
[2726.7s] But I don't.
[2727.7s] Just listen.
[2728.7s] Axes aren't toys.
[2729.7s] They are either tools or a thing that you kill people with.
[2732.3s] OK.
[2733.3s] Renkip would be a great babysitter.
[2735.3s] I feel like I'm doing a great job at babysitting.
[2737.6s] Yes, you're right.
[2738.6s] You are.
[2739.6s] How many people have you killed?
[2742.2s] I mean.
[2743.2s] We probably need to go.
[2744.2s] OK.
[2745.2s] Yeah.
[2746.2s] Let's wrap it up.
[2747.2s] Yeah, we're going to.
[2748.2s] Did you get them in?
[2749.2s] Yeah.
[2750.2s] I traced it down.
[2751.2s] I pulled out some paper and some ink.
[2752.2s] And we're good to go on that end.
[2753.6s] OK.
[2754.6s] Good.
[2755.6s] Awesome.
[2756.6s] OK.
[2757.6s] You guys stay safe.
[2758.6s] OK.
[2759.6s] Do you need us to close up the door?
[2760.6s] Because that's usually what Alydin gets us to do.
[2762.7s] Close the door.
[2763.7s] Sure.
[2764.7s] Put the crate on the door.
[2765.7s] Maybe.
[2766.9s] Someone's going to be here if we like.
[2768.2s] I'm going to say maybe not the crate.
[2770.1s] Maybe just the door.
[2771.1s] Yeah.
[2772.1s] Maybe leave the crate off.
[2773.1s] Just the door.
[2774.1s] The crate can stay off, kids.
[2775.1s] OK.
[2776.1s] Yeah.
[2777.1s] OK.
[2778.1s] I mean, if a kid can move a crate, we can probably take care of it.
[2779.1s] Yeah.
[2780.1s] I guess that's true.
[2781.1s] That's good.
[2782.1s] All right.
[2783.1s] Depends on the angle.
[2784.1s] I mean, if we're going to get mathematical about it.
[2785.1s] The leverage of it all.
[2786.1s] I would say just to be safe, maybe no crates on top of doors that we just went
[2790.1s] through.
[2791.1s] OK.
[2792.1s] Maybe just keep an eye on it.
[2793.1s] Keep a pass.
[2794.1s] OK.
[2795.1s] Look at this.
[2796.4s] Or look at the door until you come back.
[2798.4s] Yes.
[2799.4s] I mean, you can look at other things.
[2801.4s] Yes.
[2802.4s] Other things.
[2803.4s] You know what I mean?
[2804.4s] Yeah.
[2805.4s] Just don't leave.
[2806.4s] Maybe crack a book open, kids.
[2807.4s] I don't know.
[2808.4s] Oh.
[2809.4s] Something like that.
[2810.4s] Yeah.
[2811.4s] What's the book?
[2812.4s] Never mind.
[2813.4s] You're doing a great job, kids.
[2814.4s] OK.
[2815.4s] And just hang out here.
[2816.4s] OK.
[2817.4s] And we'll come back up with all of the people that we need to come up with.
[2822.8s] And none of the ones we don't need to.
[2825.0s] For sure.
[2827.0s] I tell you what.
[2828.0s] Play with this magical object I've been toying around with.
[2830.2s] It's a question answer.
[2831.5s] You take this ball.
[2832.5s] You shake it as you ask a question and it will tell you an answer.
[2836.2s] If you give it a moment, an answer will appear from it.
[2839.3s] OK.
[2840.3s] OK.
[2841.3s] So you can ask it all the questions in the world and it will give you responses.
[2844.8s] And I'll take it back when I get back because it's still in progress.
[2848.4s] Still work in progress.
[2849.4s] Right.
[2850.4s] Right.
[2851.4s] Of course.
[2852.4s] Yeah.
[2853.4s] We will keep it very, very safe.
[2854.4s] OK, Deitra.
[2855.8s] We'll close the door.
[2857.1s] And as they close the door, you hear, how many people did he kill?
[2864.2s] Ask again later.
[2865.2s] Dumbgeons and Dragons, Season 3, Episode 15.
[2877.1s] Starring Amy More as Alydin, Carla Maxted as Bonwyn Everbane, Tom Laird as Kavlaran
[2882.3s] Goldweave, Kyle Claset as Bizard the Wizard, with special guest Joe Fisher from Midnight
[2887.8s] Burger as Rin Kip Celador, and Russ More as your Dungeon Master.
[2892.2s] Dialogue Editing by Carla Maxted and Sound Design by Russ More.
[2896.4s] This episode featured music from Epidemic Sound and sound effects from Epidemic
[2900.3s] Sound, Boom Library, and Sound Ideas.
[2903.4s] Our amazing cover art and character designs are by Matt Garbutt, and a huge thank
[2907.6s] you to our supporting producers, Gabriel Lynch, Jessica Babiak, Cat Waterflame, Jacob
[2912.6s] Madden, Christian Brown, Angaron Kiersen, Perry Matey, Craig Zeiss, Old School Gamer
[2918.0s] D, L.A. Branton, Nathaniel Teeter, and Aaron.
[2922.0s] Another thank you.
[2923.0s] We've already done it because Rin Kip's shown up before, but Joe has brought them
[2926.4s] to life in this episode and the next two episodes.
[2930.3s] What was I saying?
[2932.2s] Rin Kip Celador was a name given to us by Twiglets.
[2935.4s] If you want to help us build the world with NPCs and shop names and street names and landmarks,
[2941.3s] you can do so at patreon.com slash dumbdraggingcast, where, for as little as five bucks a month
[2946.9s] and a seven-day free trial, you get access to a whole bunch of amazing bonus content,
[2952.1s] including an exclusive Patreon-only show called The Adventures of, and we'll be
[2956.0s] starting a cyberpunk red show, starting very soon, GM'd by Kyle.
[2960.8s] That's patreon.com slash dumbdraggingcast.
[2962.7s] We hope to see you over there.
[2964.3s] That's it for now.
[2965.3s] See you next week when Joe joins us again and we try and track down Alydin.
[2969.3s] Maybe they'll get out of the cage.
[2970.3s] Have a great week.
[2971.3s] We'll talk to you soon.
[2974.3s] I have a question.
[2975.3s] I'm already, I'm already turned around.
[2978.3s] Fuck tunnels.
[2979.3s] I'm looking through, I'm looking through the hole.
[2984.3s] Yeah.
[2985.3s] However big it is or opening.
[2986.3s] And then you turned around.
[2988.3s] Okay.
[2989.3s] So they're behind me and now the only place I have to go is through this little hole
[2992.3s] to get into the goblin city.
[2993.3s] So like the plan I had to run away is not okay.
[2997.3s] Cause you sat and waited.
[3000.3s] Wow.
[3001.3s] If someone didn't breathe so damn hard.
[3003.3s] Carpe diem.
[3004.3s] Sees the hole.
[3005.3s] If not now, when?
[3006.3s] I'm 14.
[3007.3s] How much longer am I actually going to live?
[3009.3s] Fun fact.
[3010.3s] I once spent two episodes in that cellar.
[3013.3s] Just the cellar alone.
[3015.3s] Most of it just in one crate.
[3018.3s] Dumbgeons and Dragons is a Dumb Dragons production.