It is the middle of the night on this first night of your adventure that you're slowly,
quickly finding out is more of just an excursion for a rich person in this town.
Bizard is the end of your first one.
You hear the jingle of the bell that you had set up and then a scream from Ignatius
and you quickly turn and now everybody wakes up.
Something is something's here.
Everyone rise.
Something's happening.
Okay.
What is it?
Does anybody see it?
What kind of what kind of something?
I don't know.
Let's look around.
It might be a small animal.
It might be a ne'er-do-well as I said.
Hard to say.
You're all back to back to back to back looking out and around.
Ignatius is still sleeping occasionally screaming.
You hear just like a swift move through the tall grass and then another jingle of the bell off into your right,
which makes everybody turn and look.
Bench lets out a small scream as well.
Did anybody see it?
I didn't see it.
I mean something but...
We hear another jingle of the bell often often behind from where the sound is coming
and we cut ahead and Bench is holding a flaming stick and everybody's screaming as the bell continually is ringing around you.
You can't see anything yet.
You're all chaotically looking around trying to figure out what's happening.
Did anybody see it?
I don't know but it's coming from everywhere.
It's everywhere.
It's everywhere all at once.
It's all directions.
I think there's a lot of them.
We cut ahead again and you're completely surrounded by squirrels around this smoldering fire.
The burning stick has been tossed down and they are encircling your area.
I threw down some leftover key lime tart.
The leader of these squirrels slowly steps forward and dips like a little paw into it and takes a little nibble
and turns and looks at all of them and gives a quick nod
and we cut ahead and you're all seated around this smoldering fire.
All the squirrels are gone.
That was very, very close.
I think we could have died.
I mean, when there's a lot of something, no matter how small it is, it does become sort of frightening.
The dark gives the big shadows too.
Yeah.
I mean, I'm not really from around here.
Is like a roving squirrel gang just run of the mill?
Haven't spent a lot of time in the hill.
So but I don't think so.
And you all slowly look to the side where Bizard has cleaned up.
The dishes where there is a carcass of a rabbit and a squirrel.
Maybe, maybe they were upset that we ate one of them and that was an offering.
Maybe they thought that the pie was one of us.
Ooh, that's a very good possibility.
Oh, okay.
I mean, how many pies do we have left?
Oh, I brought one for each night.
We each had one tonight.
I didn't know how many nights we were going to be out.
So I assumed I've got like a crumb left.
Great.
Don't eat the crumb.
No problem.
Welcome to Dumbgeons and Dragons, a D&D 5th edition actual play podcast.
I'm your dungeon master Russ More.
He, him also with me is Carla Maxted as Bonwyn Everbane.
She, her.
That will make sense.
Like what as more context is is revealed.
Tom Laird as Kavlaran Goldweave.
He, him.
Uh, no, no, not, not, not.
I can feel it though.
And Kyle Claset as Bizard the Wizard.
He, him.
Okay.
Yeah.
Get the rope ready and I'll, I'll go down first.
Dumbgeons and Dragons is a Patreon supported podcast.
Join us today at patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast and get yourself a free seven
day trial to see what's happening over there.
It's bonus content, it's hangouts, it's great games.
It's a whole lot of fun.
And now fuck it.
Let's play.
Your midday the next day, sun is shining bright overhead.
Everybody's feeling quite tired from the night previous where nobody
except for Ignatius got a restful night's sleep.
He's leading a few, uh, probably 10 or 15 steps ahead of everybody
as you're all dragging ass a little bit.
This is what's, uh, what's wrong with everybody?
Did you not sleep well on this night?
This first adventure is he's looking back at you walking backwards,
jauntily bouncing.
Oh, um, it just, uh, yeah, not a great sleep.
Not a, not a great sleep, but fortune favor.
Uh, the map in the middle of the night must have gotten a little wet
and has revealed an alternate path towards our treasure.
And he holds it up.
See, look, this line wasn't here when I looked at it right
before I went to bed.
I can only believe a secret line.
Yes.
Secret map.
A secret line.
Very exciting.
Must be the best way to get there.
The real way to get there.
Fortunately, it's going to the same place.
Perfect.
That means very, very convenient.
You are a master.
So we have one of two options.
We follow this secret line or we go on the original path as it was
intended to get the full experience for the adventure.
And he's nodding very deeply in this, looking for approval from
anybody in the group.
I just need one.
See, Ignatius, I think that you have become so masterful
at exploration that the answers were given to you.
And why should you say no to something that is handed to you
because you earned it?
That's a great question.
Good thought.
That is a good thought.
Well, perhaps another day then.
Perhaps another day we'll go out and we'll do the original
trek as was made by the pirates of old.
Yes.
Okay.
Great idea.
In an effort to get straight to the goods, let's take this
line and see where it leads us.
See what treasures behold.
See what hopes and dreams we are to fulfill from here on out.
Cav nudges, bench in the ribs.
He said it again.
That means that maybe we actually get hopes and dreams.
As Ignatius says that and turns and is with even more
expediency following along this green dotted line path
towards the treasure.
Everybody else is left back behind.
Gothar and Darryl are trying to keep up as best they can
because it's their job to keep them keep them safe.
So hopes and dreams are a good thing.
It would be bad to leave him out here.
Right.
Oh, well, we can't leave him out.
That wouldn't be wouldn't be great.
I don't know.
I was just confirming that fact and maybe if nobody else
had agreed one of my best customers.
Fair, fair, you know, and not a bad guy.
Just just a little misguided.
That's all he's got some problems.
Yeah, I at least need him to make it back to town
because there are certain expectations of me coming out
here other than me just having a good time.
But but yeah, no, we need to make sure that he makes
it back to town.
Yeah, no.
Yeah, of course, I was not.
Yeah, I was not inferring that we should leave him to
die out here.
That would be that would be ridiculous.
That would be so silly.
Yeah, yeah, we need just adventures on the way and bench
picks up his pace a little bit to separate himself
from all of you.
Expectations like the treasure or what do you mean?
Bazaar.
Yeah, they're a little bit of that, you know,
because I was told this was a pirate treasure and the
assumptions that I had made and as to why I was not
able to attend some of the advisor meetings for the
mayor that there would be some returned funds,
whichever was procured.
So that being said, if there were to be procured
funds, we would find considerably less than what we
actually found.
So which I hesitate to say in front of an auditor if
I'm not mistaken, you just mean like a finder's
fee.
Yes, that's exactly what it is.
I think you're entitled to a certain percentage.
Yeah, because you know, there has to be some
return to the coffers from which they were stolen from
according to the understanding, you know, so if anybody
shows back up with any sum, there's an expectation of
a percentage of that sum.
Now, whatever that sum may be is to be determined.
At a later date.
If it's 41.
Yes, actually, yes, that actually goes really well
for nothing like having a capital auditor on the party
this.
Your services may be very handy.
So just to be frank with y'all, you know, I, you
know, I was going to mention it once we found the
treasure, but once I learned like, oh, that may
not be the case.
It's like, well, I may have a problem, but I don't
want you to think that you have a problem.
Okay, sure.
Yeah.
Bye.
Kind of shoot Bonwyn to look like I don't know what
the hell he's talking about.
I'm really sure I understand, but I mean, Bonwyn
just assumes it will make sense as more context
is is revealed in the moment.
I'm sure it'll click for me.
And you all catch up to Ignatius.
You've made your way into the mountains at this
point is kind of midday.
Now you're all sweating buckets because you've
been going quite quickly along this green line to
make sure that you're making good time.
So you could be back if not by the end of the day,
then first thing the next day you're following
behind him leading up this winding mountain path.
You're starting to get the idea that maybe you're
you're not falling.
You're not seeing any cave entrances.
You're not seeing any sign of like a real foot
path obviously because you drew the line, but
also like maybe Ignatius isn't following this
and as you're about to go confront him, you
see that he makes it up to this plateau and he's
standing there.
And as you round the bend to just kind of say,
hey, maybe we should turn back.
There's like a big Eureka.
Like we found it.
We found the X or at least where I believe
the X is look everybody.
There's an entrance to a cave.
Okay, great work.
Great job Ignatius.
Wow.
This is the thrill of the adventure, isn't it?
This is this is what they this is what they tell
you about in the in the stories.
All those all those seafarers, all those river
pirates, all those people going out and fighting
monsters.
That's what this is all about, isn't it?
Sure.
We've only seen squirrels and rabbits and maybe
a few birds, but but like from here on out
who knows what's in front of us.
I mean the squirrels were pretty terrifying the
squirrel.
Oh, he missed that you were you were sawing
logs.
We had it doesn't matter.
Was there something scary about the squirrels?
I just saw them up in the trees.
I'm sure they were clustered into groups,
which is kind of unusual from my understanding
of squirrels, but then staring at us longingly
from a distance.
They're saying there's something nefarious
about that.
You know what?
Don't even worry about it.
Totally fine.
Not a big deal.
Onward into the cave and he followed by
Daryl and Gothar struck into this cave.
You follow obviously.
What do we see it?
It is like an obvious cave entrance.
It is an obvious cave entrance.
As you approach you're all looking around
trying to figure out like what might be here
if there is anything here.
So make an investigation role as you're
walking in.
So say any signs of wildlife or anything
like that would be good to note.
Oh man, these dice are so bad.
I got an eight.
It's a it's a one, but it wasn't a
crit fail.
So wait, you have a minus to your
investigation and you're an auditor.
Oh, I'm not a good one.
No one ever said cab was a good auditor.
That's why he keeps getting sent to
these far-flung places.
Yeah, I feel like you said that out
loud at some point, but I forgot it
or didn't know cabs like good socially
bad at his job.
Terrible job.
Perfect.
Yeah, I do remember you saying that
now.
He's just sort of like failed upward.
Yeah, glorious.
Okay.
So with an with a one you're happy
to be along for the journey with
an eight.
You see some rough tracks leading
to and from the cave with a 16
bond when you're able to see that
these tracks, although they are
old, they are bear tracks that
look like they have come to and
from you can't tell what's the
most recent is there's some some
time that has that has passed.
You know, being that you're out
there's no snow like it's not
hibernation season.
So if it were like you might
worry about like a sleeping
bear in there, but you pretty
sure that there's probably no
bear at least in the in the
phase of this cave.
Okay.
You all catch up to Ignatius
and Gothar and Darryl and you
find yourselves in this cave
entrance.
There isn't any animals in here
that you see looking around.
There's some piled up bones off
in the corner, which looks like
they're just small game.
There's some sticks and branches
that look like they've been
dragged up by something and at
the back of this cave is what
looks like a shaft that goes
deeper into the mountain and
it looks like it's been like
carved.
Something has created this
shaft.
Ignatius doesn't notice that
he's too busy like examining
the the hardened scat that
may that he's finding in the
corners on the floor probably
spawn when you would be the
first one to see this.
Well, luckily no bears
everyone.
I think we can agree that's
that's great.
Absolutely.
Was that a concern?
Well, I mean you you're
noticing the sign.
I saw it some tracks.
You know a bear probably
comes and goes from here,
but that's part of the
adventure, right?
Just maybe next part of the
adventure.
I will slow down before going
in and get somebody to check
for bears next time writing
a note.
It's a great plan.
It's a learning experience,
right?
Absolutely out on your first
adventure.
I think that if I notice
this, I'm not sure I want
to point it out to him.
Okay, just why I'm just
like making chit chat.
Okay, got it.
Like I'm thinking I want to
get home.
I don't really think there's
treasure here.
What are we getting into?
So I'm still contemplating
like do I point this out to
him and you like go down the
thing and see there's nothing
there or like he's continuing
to look around.
He hasn't noticed go Thor
and Daryl are just following
behind him.
They're not actually looking
around.
They're just like also in
the same boat given some
time you bizarre would be
able to come across it.
So like we'll say that you're
kind of still at the the face
of trying to figure out like
if in fact the bear tracks
as as Bonwyn saying like
clearly no bears here.
So you haven't made it that
deep in but if you were
to venture in you too would
be able to find it and I
feel like cav.
You're kind of playing
watch right now at the at
the face of the at the
face of the cave benches
there too.
He's having a time he
threatened to you know he
brought up the fact that he
might kill this rich person.
So, you know, he's just
playing a little cool right
now just like squirrels
really really freaked him
out.
He's a real city boy really
freaked him out.
I feel like I would maybe
make eye contact like if
if bizarre seems to be like
noticing it I'll be like
should we yeah like mowing
should we tell him like
bizarre would do the same
thing like look over and be
like pointing at it like
hey everybody I found
something interesting over
here and he's often in a
different corner you go
over and sees like it looks
like some sort of oil can
why would there be an oil
can up here he hands it
to you and it is in fact
and it does sound like
it has some oil in there
but it's like a rusted
they you know picture like
Wizard of Oz like that
kind of like sure yeah
with the long straw kind
of end huh well that is
strange tis tis why would
a bear need an oil can
stiff joints.
Oh touche.
Yep.
I didn't think of that
perhaps the bear has
osteoporosis of some
sort and this is just
something to lube up them
joints.
Maybe while these guys are
having this great meeting
I settle up next to
Bizarre like should we
should we tell him or
should we just go or I
mean the worst thing that
could happen is he goes
down there himself and
then if he doesn't make
it back then that's not
really our fault but I
mean you're right there
could be there could
actually be treasure and
I know you kind of need
that yeah I mean it
would help I've been
giving a lot of rash
reasoning for things to
the mayor recently and I
feel like I kind of need
like something tangible
this time but again I
don't want that to be
anybody else's problem
then if I need to make
something happen I will
I mean we're already
here right.
Yeah.
You know we yeah yeah
we've already I mean the
shop's not opening
today.
Yeah.
Okay.
Oh my goodness I just
noticed something for the
very first time over here.
What is it?
What did you find?
Come come take a look.
Yes.
Oh my goodness.
Look at this.
Look at this everybody
would you get your eyes
on this one.
This is a cave that
goes even deeper into
the mountain.
Oh I'm so excited.
Are we going down there
who's going first?
I can't see the bottom
it seems like it's very
far down there.
Oh I'm just as giddy
as a schoolboy.
Can I see anything
into it?
I do have dark vision
also you know
dwarf I'm good at
caves.
Yeah I mean you're
inspiration when it comes
to caves.
I know what caves do.
Yeah you look down
and as your eyes are
adjusting you don't
really see anything
but then they become
clearer.
About 15 feet down
you see what looks like
a metal cage
that comes into view.
There is look like
some crude handholds
on the wall on the
opposite side.
You could somebody
could reach it
but yeah there's a
there's a there's a cage.
I do have cave
but it's actually called
stone cunning.
So if I made
an intelligence check
about the origin of
stonework I'm proficient
in history.
So like
I would be good at
recognizing if this
was something
something dwarven
or that
that isn't just a
weird creepy one
off cage buried
in the mountains.
Much like Ken's job
is just beach.
Yeah my job is just
cave.
We're finding out so much
about our characters.
Okay is there a role
to that or is it just
a known thing?
It's a history check.
All right well give me
a history check.
Sure okay.
You look down
you you can immediately
sense that this has been
carved not just weather
worn this this
shaft that goes down
into the tunnel
but as soon as you see
the cage itself
like you get a
distinct sense that
this is carved by
human or dwarf
or some some sort
for what looks to be
like a mining cage.
So there could be a
pulley system inside
you don't like
it goes up a ways
to you don't really see
any fixed mechanisms
but there could be something
inside that allows movement
for it.
But yeah that's the sense
you get.
So there is a purpose
not just a weird cage
in a mountain.
Perfect I feel better
already.
I think this
was some kind of mining
operation which would
explain the oil
and so I don't know
if that cage
moves.
I'm not sure how related
this would be to the river
pirates and a treasure.
Perhaps the river pirates
moonlighted as as
miners.
You have to diversify
your income portfolio.
I mean a tough side hustle
mining is a tough side
hustle. But when the river
runs a little lower hard
to get those ships out
maybe they retreat to the
mountains to dig deep
mining season.
Yes.
Yes mining season.
Aha.
Yes.
Pirate in the summer
miner in the winter.
Well because like where do
they go?
Here apparently
not for some time
because of the bears
obviously.
Right. Right.
I'm going to go see if we
brought rope.
I'll be right back.
I mean I definitely have
rope.
Absolutely I have rope.
I don't have rope.
I have a bag of sand.
I don't know why I brought
that.
But you can fashion into
a magical rope.
No I can throw it in
somebody's eyes and run
away.
Oh smart.
Yeah that's really good.
Also it's also really
helpful.
Flying magical
pockets in.
And I said
hey
I said hey
this is the middle.
Welcome to the middle
everybody.
How you doing?
Oh man.
Dang good.
Amy how are you enjoying
Charis's adventure during
this adventure?
Don't speak in specifics
but just vagaries.
What's Charis's mindset?
You know
determined.
Oh I like that.
And adventurous.
OK good.
That's where she's at right
now.
This aligns with the
potential idea I have
in my head of where
Charis slash Alydin is.
So that's perfect.
Love it.
Joke's on you.
I already know.
Excellent.
I can't wait to find out
then.
But we're having a great
time and
we would love for you
to hang out with us
more.
Tom tell them about
Patreon.
Well I pull up a page.
OK.
Easy peasy.
Patreon.com slash
dumb dragon cast.
Get all sorts of cool
stuff when you're there
like a dedication
to a random patron for
every episode
which we'll come back to.
We'll circle back to that
with the face that Russ
made. We're going to circle
right back to it.
You also get the
adventures of which is a
game I run every
you get an episode every
month with Russ
playing a tabaxi
bard named Opal Light
Brightcliffs who is
clinically insane.
Oh yeah sure that too.
And Amy and Carla are
there too all the time
playing different characters
as well.
Night Hunter for Amy
and Elia for Carla
and it's just rule
of cool flies for
that one.
So if it's fun we're going
for it.
So there's a bunch of
episodes of that.
I think we just
tell me more about the
the shout out.
We're going back to the
dedication.
Let's run back.
All right.
So when you're a
Patreon supporter you
get an episode dedicated
to you like today's
patron Tiffany
Parrot.
Thanks Tiffany.
Thanks so much Tiffany.
So you can be super
cool like Tiffany
if you join us on
Patreon where there is
also a seven day free
trial is that correct
Ross seven day free
trial and when you
sign up for three
continuous month
not three continuous
month three three
months for three
months consecutive.
Yeah consecutive
they don't even need
to be consecutive.
You just sign up
for three months.
You could dip out
and come back.
You get some we
send you some
rewards with some
merch.
That's the word
I'm looking for swag.
I'm so excited that
this is happening.
The merch is actually
starting to ship.
So what we didn't
tell our patrons on
the gook hang we
had last night
as this is released
is that the merch
is starting to ship.
We've been trying
to figure it out
and now it's
working.
We're getting there.
Yes.
Another thing you
get if you're a patron
gook hang which
just means like
you want you to
hang out with us.
Yeah.
Once a month we
do a hangout
and we answer
questions and
there's a lot of
questions a lot of
people.
There's separate
channels in the
discord.
There's all
sorts of bonus stuff.
So out of all
of those hundreds
of things we just
listed find the
one that you really
like and come for
that.
Yeah.
Because you don't
have to do
everything.
You don't have to
do anything.
No.
We do.
But you don't.
You should do
all the things
but you don't
have to.
Or like pace
yourself because
they're going to
be there.
That's true.
Let's get back
to this adventure
now as we
have filled
enough time.
We did it.
That's right.
And didn't it all
talk about
cyberpunk red.
Oh my God.
Cyberpunk reds
coming around
the bend this
entire time.
I'm sitting
here going I
thought when
are they going
to bring up
cyberpunk?
When did they get
to the fireworks
factory?
It's like a
booster gang or
tearing around
the corner
slinging lead.
You never saw
it come and
here's cyberpunk
red another
new show
coming for you.
It's going to
be great.
Kyle's running
it and then we
can't we can't
wait for you to
hear session
zero be
coming out
this month.
We're just
building characters
and getting
to know the
world and
then we're
jumping into
it and it's
going to be
a blast.
It better be
Kyle.
Definitely.
Oh,
it's going to
be.
I'm so
pumped like
y'all
y'all don't
know.
Okay,
good.
So good.
Okay,
that's the
end of the
middle.
Thanks for
real this
time for
wheels now.
Bye.
Love you.
Bye.
Okay,
I guess
we're going to
go down
there or
who's got
good upper
body strength
that looks
like there
might be a
bit of a rock
climb down.
I don't have
somebody said
upper body
strength.
Yeah,
I've got
this.
I've got
these giant
guns here
and I've
I've made
it less
weird for
myself from
our previous
conversation
so I can
join the
group again
and I've
calmed down
now that
there's a
purpose for
being here.
Yes,
I could
go climb
down into
the cage
if everybody
is wanting
to go
down into
the cage.
I'm curious
what's in
there.
There might
be a
mechanism
or something
that would
lower it
down
deeper or
Okay,
let's
go.
Bench is
going to
roll
athletics.
He
he's
tall.
He's a
big guy.
He can
reach
across
and grab
the the
handholds
is like
maybe
oh,
hold on
as he
does that
maybe we
just tie
me off.
That's a
great idea.
I was
going to
suggest
I was
just going
to go
for it
because I
did so
well on
that rope
ladder
back at
the audition.
But
maybe
yeah,
I'd
feel more
comfortable
just like
a plummet.
Perfect.
All right.
Okay.
I am
pretty heavy.
So like
maybe
three
or four
of you
holding
the other
side
and then
it would
be good.
Okay,
he
reaches
out.
She's
tied off.
You're
all bracing
and holding
and he
begins
to move
down
and you
hear his
feet
after he
disappears
out of
you
It's a little
tight
fit.
I don't
okay.
I'm
inside.
I see
here's
what I see.
I see
more
cage
on the
side.
There's a
big
lever
and there's
a looks
like a
chain
in the
middle
here.
Where does
the chain
go?
Chain
goes
down.
Chain
goes
down.
Oh,
chain
goes
up
and to
the side.
It looks
like
this is
the top.
So
so I
could
I don't
want to pull the
lever yet because I'm
tied to the
rope.
Yeah,
good
good plan.
Is it
rusty?
How's it
seem?
Oh,
well,
yeah,
it's a little
rust like
I haven't
been
a
she
got it
here.
Yeah,
yeah,
it's
I don't
know what's
going to
happen
if we
pull this
lever,
but like it's
a little
rusty,
but like
I've seen
worse.
Well,
hold on one
second and I
I'm going to
go grab the
oil can and
be like
catch.
Yeah.
Oh,
thanks.
Yeah.
Well,
that that
greased it up.
Does anybody
want to come
down with
me before
I pull this
lever?
Am I just
going to
go by myself?
Well,
is the
room?
It seemed
like you
are pretty
tight in
there bench.
Well,
I'm a
big guy.
Like it's
probably room
for like
four normal
sized
people probably
two other
people with
me.
Okay.
I mean I'm
a lot shorter
than you
and like
you were
skinny too
Bizards.
So like
maybe we
can squeeze
all four
of us in
here.
If you
can make
sure to
catch me
if I
fall,
I'm
fairly
tired and
already,
you know,
not made
for the
the climbing
part.
So
I'm
likely
to fall
if I
try to
climb
down there.
So
we'll see
what happens.
Adventure.
I mean,
we'll keep
the rope.
I think
we'll keep
the rope and
then you
can kind of
work down
the rope.
I mean,
you're
I think you're
light.
And your
hand can
catch you.
No.
Why not?
I
don't
weigh
just
five pounds.
There is
a limitation
to magic.
You
understand
that it's
not
just
the ad.
No,
okay,
of course
not.
No,
I'm
not going
to use
my
very
simple
spell
to try
to catch
my
body.
No,
that's
not how
it works.
Okay.
Yeah,
get the
rope ready
and I'll
I'll
go down
first.
Yeah,
we'll
Okay.
There's
there's
enough time
here that
we can
each take
time to
kind of
go down
here without
any
additional
support
or worry
that you're
all going
to fall.
Bench is
ready to
catch you
if you
slip.
We've
got you
tied off
to ropes.
Like
there's
enough
good things
here.
I don't
think we
need a
roll.
So
I
assume
if
we're
talking
four
of us,
obviously
it's going
to be
the four
of us
here
and
Ignatius
can
he had
kind of,
you know,
gone
back and
the bodyguards
were with
him.
I mean he
was going
to send us
anyway,
right?
Yeah,
absolutely.
You
all find
yourselves
tightly
packed
inside of
this
cage
in
this
mineshaft.
Bench
is like,
okay,
so I
can't
quite
reach
the
lever
anymore.
If you
want to
Luckily you guys have been skipping leg day.
There's kind of
spacious down here.
Yeah,
right.
Yeah.
No,
I've got to
work on that.
I don't
want to
don't want to fall
too far
behind.
All right,
pull the
lever,
Baldwin.
I'm assuming
it's like,
yeah,
like in the middle
of the floor,
like a
yeah,
yeah.
Okay,
cool.
Well,
I'm
gonna
try to
move the
lever
a little
bit.
All right.
Make a
strength
check
for me,
please.
Am I
strong?
I do
work with
heavy
tools all
day.
You do.
You don't have to
be strong to
be strong.
Nat 20.
Damn.
Strong as
shit.
All right.
So yeah,
you go to
move it.
This plays exactly
into my
blacksmithing
muscles.
I really
like a
Rosie the
Riveter
type situation
going on here.
So you
begin to
move the
lever
and so
it's stuck.
It's
a little
greased
and bench is
like,
just
and he
puts a
little more
oil on
it and then
easily.
It
moves for
you,
which
you hear the
chain
begin to
go like
and you
begin to
descend.
You
pull it
back to
stop
so you
don't
just like
go
fast
or
plummet
or anything,
but then
you do
have
control
over it
as you
go.
Okay,
here
we go.
And
you,
Bonwyn
moving
the
lever
begin to
move
down
through
this shaft.
The
chain
going
up behind
you and
it
is going
into
the side
of this
this mountain,
but this
whole
machine
is going
down.
You
move
down
some
way,
somebody
roll a
survival
who
you think
would be
paying attention
to how
deep
you're
going
if anybody
is actually
paying
attention.
I feel
like if
I'm in
the middle
controlling
the thing,
I can't
even see
anything.
Yeah,
because I'm
surrounded.
So,
not me.
I would be
looking down
just out of
concern of
being in an
old,
rusty
cage.
Yeah, this was a
bad choice
we've made.
We went,
we found an
old,
abandoned mine
cart and
just got in it.
Let's do that.
With that being said,
even just
looking down
and trying to
be like,
am I going to
live or
die in this
thing?
I got a 16
on survival.
Okay,
okay.
And,
Cav,
you're just
along for the
ride right now?
Cav's kind of
looking like
back the
way they came.
Okay.
So,
you're
paying attention to
how deep
you're going.
Bizard
and Cav,
you look
back
up.
You see
Ignatius
pop their
head over
just quickly
and you
scream down,
hey,
you,
you left
without me.
We'll send
the next one
up for you.
Oh,
oh,
okay,
great.
Well,
we'll just
wait here
patiently then.
Hope nothing
exciting happens.
Don't want to
miss out.
His voice is
getting quieter
the further
down you're
going.
Bizard,
you notice
that you've
gone down
or can
roughly
judge that
you've
gone down
about
a hundred
feet
when
the
the shaft
opens up.
It still
continues
to
go down
into the
mountain,
but opens
up and there
are two
pathways
on
either side.
Bonwyn,
you see
this as
well,
even though
there's
lots of
legs around
you.
You are
able to
stop it
there if
you want to
take a
look down
either way
or see
if you
can see
anything
down either
way.
Yeah,
definitely,
definitely
going to
stop
here.
Anybody see
anything?
A little too
dark for
me.
Need a
torch.
I have
dark vision.
Russ,
can I
see any?
Yes,
if you have dark vision.
I also have
dark vision.
Okay,
so the two
dark visions
roll
an investigation.
They'll
say left
and right.
Who's
looking left?
Who's
looking right?
Cap's
strong point.
That's a
nine.
Nineteen.
I'll be
looking left.
I'll be
looking right then.
This is my
new favorite die,
and now I've
just jinxed
it by saying
that,
but it's
been rolling
real good.
Okay,
Cav,
you look
down,
and you
can see
just about
to the
end where
there's
like,
it's
dark,
but you
can see
like the
the way
you're
looking
ends
without
much.
You see
like a
loose
tool,
like a
pickaxe
and a
hammer,
but otherwise
nothing
down the
way you're
looking.
Carla,
nothing
for the
first little
ways,
but then
there's
what you
can see
is a
you make
out as
somewhat of a
clearing,
and inside
this clearing
it looks
like there
are
large
wooden
structures.
Well,
there's
definitely
something
down that
way.
It's not a
sign that
says
pirate
treasure,
but it's
something.
I mean,
we should
go look,
right?
Yeah,
that makes
sense.
Okay.
I believe
you.
Did we
bring any
torches?
Bench is
looking through
his bag.
I've got a
candle.
Yeah,
candle,
candle will
work.
Candle's
great.
Yeah,
I can,
I can make a
candle work.
Great.
Here's a,
here's a
candle for
you.
So there's a,
there's a
door on
either side of
this cage.
You get
out and
you're
walking down
and you
make your
way to
this clearing.
Carla,
roll me
2D6,
please.
Uh,
one and
a three.
Okay.
You
enter
this,
this
cavern that
opens up.
There is
another,
on the other
side,
you can see
that there is
what looks like
another shaft,
but in
between all
of that,
there are
wooden and
metal
structures.
They
look like
there may
be,
actually,
roll history
for me
as well.
Oh boy.
Well,
that's
poor.
That's
a four,
because it's
not
cave
history.
I am,
I'm
pretty,
pretty
cave-focused,
my
knowledge.
Yeah.
Everybody
can go
investigate
these.
I'll do so.
I can
either
roll investigation
or
history.
We'll
give you
everybody
another
chance there.
You
don't
know what
they are
at first
glance,
but
you
history.
That's
much nicer
for
Cav.
Yeah.
What,
minus
two isn't
good for
you?
It's
not
great.
That's
a 17.
History,
that is
a
25.
Damn.
We got
that
candle lit.
That's
right.
Now we can
read
these
books,
y'all.
Now he
knows what's
up.
Well,
that's
what you
learn at
Bernhard
Swans.
So you're
going up
to these,
and maybe
it's
just the
the air
down here,
Bonwyn.
It takes
you a
minute,
but as
soon as
you're
able to
also
investigate
these,
like you,
you all
begin to
get it,
but
Blizzard,
you get it
first,
is that
these
large
mining
tools,
like the
closer,
you're
able to
determine
that one
of them
is a
large
auger.
Also
has
rusting
to it.
The
wood
is
broken
in some
places.
Looks
like they
could be
repaired
or
repurposed,
but
that's
what you
determine
these
are,
and as
you
work your
way
through,
there
is
another
shaft.
This
one
has a
ladder
attached
to it.
The
ladder
goes
down
further
into the
mountain,
and the
shaft
continues
up
and
out.
You can
see
daylight
coming
from
somewhere
higher
up
in the
mountain,
leading
you to
believe
for
Bonwyn
that this
is
probably
an
air vent
of some
sort
that was
created
for
the
mine.
Okay,
well,
the
treasure
could
be
some
vintage
mining
tools
if
we
choose
to
feel
that
way
about
them,
or
we
could
keep
looking.
Is there
anything that you see,
Bonwyn,
that's kind of an
indication as to
what materials
were being
mined
here?
Oh,
great
question.
I should
know that,
or like,
what do you
want me to
roll?
But I am
the,
the
oars
expert.
I would
think if anyone
would know
when the
group
pick up
fragments
of
iron
and
roll me
a D20,
please.
12.
And there's
like a
glittering,
a glittering
jewel,
like a dust
from a glittering
jewel of
some sort.
You can't
exactly
place it,
because it's
just very
small
fragments,
but looks like
maybe there's
something of
value that
they were also
finding,
along with
just
natural
ore and
iron.
Well,
definitely,
definitely iron,
but I don't
know if you,
if you bring
the candle
over,
you can kind
of see,
it's like,
there's like almost
like mica
or something.
It's slightly
reflective,
which would
lead me to
believe it would
be
some kind
of jewel
or a
crystal
or something
like that.
I can see
what you're
talking about
there.
Yes.
Yeah,
yeah,
so that's
just micro
particles of,
of that.
So,
I mean,
the mine is
abandoned.
So,
I don't think
we're going to
find,
like,
a truckload
of it,
but
maybe.
Right.
But who
would abandon
their mind
without
taking their
equipment
with them?
Seems like
kind of a
ill-advised
business
decision to
not take
the equipment
you paid
for.
Maybe,
maybe they
left in a
hurry?
Well,
that's
a very
good point
and
makes one
wonder why
they would
leave in a
hurry.
Yeah.
Yeah,
I don't
love that.
You
hear
up
in,
like,
the,
the ceiling
of this
cavern,
you hear,
like,
a fluttering
noise.
I snuffed
the
candle.
Plunged
into darkness.
Everybody
can see,
except you.
Actually,
Bench can't see.
He's
human too.
I just
don't know
why he
didn't
light a
candle.
He was
just going
with it,
saying,
oh,
everybody
can see,
I can
see too.
Makes
sense.
Typical
Bench.
Yeah.
Everybody
hear that?
They think
there's maybe
the squirrels
following us?
I hope
not.
I don't
think so.
Maybe
wings?
It does
sound like
wings.
Why did
we turn
out the
light?
In case
it draws
the attention
of whatever
is making
that sound.
Okay.
So do we
want to
go
back
to the
cage,
down
this
he's
pointing the
wrong
direction.
No,
he doesn't
know
where he's
pointing.
Back to
the cage,
down the
ladder,
go
home.
I'm
willing to
press
forth.
Me too.
Okay.
Me too.
Like,
lazy me
says,
let's
take the
elevator.
Okay.
I'm
gonna
hold on
to your
pack.
For no
particular
reason,
except
to know
where I'm
going.
Okay.
Bazaard,
have you
got,
you got
him?
Okay.
We're
all together.
Okay.
Trying not to
disturb
whatever made
the sound.
Let's do
a
group's
stealth
roll.
Got to
get at
least two
successes.
Dirty
20.
16.
14.
Okay,
that's three
successes.
Bench
got a
three.
Classic bench.
I just needed
two though.
So you
make your way
back,
hearing a little
bit more of
that
fluttering
sound.
Make your
way back
to the
cage.
Close it
back up.
All right.
Let's
let's go
down.
Let's
see what
we see
down here.
Okay.
Let's
go.
Let's
go
down.
See
what we
see.
You
continue
to
go
down
and
paying
attention to
the
distance
that you've
been
moving.
You can
relight
the
candle now
as you
kind of
leave
this
area.
You
are
about
another
hundred
feet
when the
same
thing
opens
back up
left
and
right.
Looking
to the
right,
you're
able to
make
out that
there's
a
cave-in.
You
can't
get
much
farther
down
that
way.
Looking
to
the
left,
you're
able
to
see that
this
pathway
extends
down
quite
some
ways,
but it
also
looks
like maybe
there's
another
shaft
that
goes
down
further
on that
way.
Looking
down,
it appears
that there's
a mineshaft
cave-in
itself
further
down.
So, if you are
to continue
in this
shaft,
you need to
get out
and go
to the
left.
Okay.
Cave-in
in one
direction.
I can
see down
a ways,
and it doesn't
look like
it's clear
either,
so we
can either
go back
up, or we
can get out
and go
in this
direction,
where I think
there might
be another
shaft down.
What do you
keep going?
I guess
we've gone
this far.
How far
down do we
think we've
gone?
Was it 200
plus feet?
I mean,
pretty far,
I think.
Yeah.
Pretty far.
Okay.
Let's
do it.
You got the
candle,
lizard,
I'll
stick close
to you.
Yep.
I've got it
ready.
Cage door
opens.
Uh,
Kyle,
roll me
2D6,
please.
Okay.
That is a total
of three,
a one
and a two,
of course.
Cause it
couldn't
be anything
else.
Uh,
you're
slowly making
your way
down this
path.
And as
you,
uh,
get to
these,
this next
shaft,
there is a
ladder
sticking up
out of it.
It's a
wooden
ladder.
Looks like
there's a couple
rungs that
have cracked
or broken
from what
you can
see,
but more or
less,
um,
a quick
investigation
of it
is able
to tell
you that
it's
reasonably
sturdy
enough
for you
to
descend.
Is this,
so we're
gonna go
down
this ladder
that looks like
it goes down
the ways
and I can tell
because I can see
perfectly clear.
And there's
nothing else
in this
room,
right?
You don't see
anything.
Okay.
I feel like
this is,
this is the last one.
We'll go down
here.
It's gotta be.
If there's nothing.
Like,
we gotta
go play act
doing something
for Ignatius
anyway,
right?
So like,
but one last try.
Okay.
You all
one by one,
I'm assuming
the people who can see,
sandwiching the people
who can't see.
That would be the
nice way to do it.
Great.
Not that I wanted to
lead you there,
but that's what we're doing.
Just hold that candle
in your mouth,
you're fine.
You climb
for,
you know,
long,
it taking you longer
to get down to this
next opening.
But as you,
Bonwyn,
get down to this
first side shaft
that opens up,
the ladder does keep
going down
in considerable ways,
farther than you can
really make out.
There is a shaft
that opens up
with what looks like
another shaft down
the other side as well.
And as you
get down
and kind of step out
just to survey the scene,
you turn
and you look
and you see something
skitter across
your vision
towards the shaft
on the other side
of this tunnel
that you've just entered.
Okay.
Skittering thing.
Big, small,
role investigation.
I can tell you.
Maybe.
That was bad.
That was a bad roll.
Ten.
Ten's not bad.
It, you would say,
is
size of a large dog.
Cool.
But yeah, you can't
really make out
what it is.
Okay.
Not huge,
but not small.
I mean,
if it's a quadruped
and it stood up
on its hind legs,
it's bigger than me.
Oh, okay.
I don't
think that's
treasure.
Agreed.
So I had said
this is our last one.
What do we think?
Yeah, I mean,
I
I can barely see,
so I'm good
going back up
at this point,
but I'm not going to
leave you behind
if you continue
to go down,
either.
And I mean,
with a big,
strong,
guy like Bench,
I'm sure there's
no fear behind those eyes,
so.
No, yeah,
you can see my eyes
clearly as day.
I feel like I want to save
some energy to make sure
we can get back up.
So I'm happy
if you are all happy
to just
make our way back
to that
cage car.
Absolutely.
Okay, great.
Let's do that.
You all begin
moving back up the ladder.
Bonwyn, as you're
the last one back up,
you hear that skittering
sound off and to the side
once more
as you are
moving back up the ladder.
Cav, you're first up.
You help Bench
followed by a
Bizard.
Bonwyn, as you're about
ready to get up,
you feel a shake
in the ladder
that feels like
something's
either
hit it
or is also
climbing up
it now.
Are you guys
shaking the ladder?
That's really not
really actually
that funny
right now.
Nope, not, not,
not.
I can feel it though.
Okay.
Not one bit.
Okay, here I come.
Double quick time now.
You now hear
scratching on the walls
coming up from
the shaft below.
I assume you're
booking it at this point.
I am going
as fast as I can.
How sturdy
and how connected
is this ladder?
Like, is it something
that if Bonwyn gets up,
I could like
push over
or is it like
more in there?
It was attached
kind of
along several points
along the way.
So while you could
damage the top,
like it would only
get maybe
six to ten feet down.
So yeah,
you book it back,
you get in
and you pull
the lever,
wrong way first
of course,
but then push it
back the right way
and begin
climbing back up.
The three guys
obviously, two
that can't see,
you don't see
anything beyond
the kind of
candlelight.
Cav,
you get
just out of the
glimpse of your eye
something,
as Bonwyn
describes,
something come up
out of the shaft
you're shorter
so you see it longer.
There's multiple
of these creatures
that are coming up
and out the shaft
and are
like four-legged
running towards you
as this is
slowly going up
and you see them
stop
at the edge
as you're looking down.
Okay.
Hated that.
Yeah.
Hated that.
Okay, why is this thing
so slow?
Does it have like
a second gear
and we just don't know?
I don't know.
It felt so fast
all the way down
and now it's just nothing.
You look back down
and you see
these creatures
like piling on top
of each other
trying to reach
to the other side
where there are
still rough
handholds
they're trying to.
You see one
kind of slip and fall
and you hear
a tumble down
into the tunnel
but then you see
one get purchase
on the wall
and it's trying
to climb up
behind you slowly
but it's
it's climbing up
the shaft
as you're making
the path
that you saw
that had the
had the auger
and the materials
and you're making
your way back up
and you start to hear
Ignatius.
Oh good.
It's coming.
It's coming back up.
They told us
they'd come back.
All right.
We're going down next.
Okay.
Nope.
What do you mean no?
No.
Certainly not.
Nope.
No.
Is there something down there?
Danger.
Not treasure?
Not there.
Dumbgeons and Dragons Season 3 Episode 13.
This episode starred
Carla Maxted as
Bonwyn Everbane,
Tom Laird as
Kavlaran Goldweave,
Kyle Claset as
Bizard the Wizard,
and Russ More as
your Dungeon Master.
Dialogue Editing by
Carla Maxted
and Sound Design by
Russ More.
This episode featured
music from Epidemic Sound
and sound effects from
Epidemic Sound,
Boom Library,
and Sound Ideas.
Our amazing
cover art and
character designs
are by Matt Garbutt.
And a huge thank you
to our supporting
producers,
Gabriel Lynch,
Jessica Babiak,
Cat Waterflame,
Jacob Madden,
Christian Brown,
Angaron Kiersen,
Perry Matey,
Craig Zeiss,
Old School Gamer D,
L.A. Branton,
Nathaniel Teeter,
and Aaron.
If you're
enjoying listening to
the adventures
here on
Dumbgeons and Dragons,
well, consider
supporting us on
Patreon.
Patreon.com slash
Dumb Dragoncast,
where when you are
a patron,
not only do you get
episode dedications
and full podcasts,
but we've got
merch to stick
around with us
for three months.
You could get
a sticker,
a mug,
a hoodie.
It depends where
you're signed up at.
But those have been
finally starting to
ship for the
first time
since we turned
them on.
And that's very
exciting.
People are going to
start receiving
merch and you
know,
it's a great time.
The Discord
community is fantastic.
Everybody's
beautiful in there
and we just
love them
to bits.
And well,
we love you too.
So hope to see
you over there.
Anyways,
that's the end
of the episode.
We'll talk to you
soon.
Okay, bye.
Dumbgeons and Dragons
is a Dumb Dragons
production.