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Previously on Dumbgeons and Dragons.

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Two of the three are alive.

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Are any of you dead enough to feel okay with being- with- with dying and then having me resurrect you?

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Uh, Jonathan's not moving.

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Oh, Jonathan, right.

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Oh no.

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I thought he was-

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Hold on, right, we- yeah.

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Boobs, get in here.

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Is that guy dead?

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Are you a doctor?

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No, wait. You're not a- wait.

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I'm kind of the opposite.

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No, it didn't- kind of sounded, yeah, the other way.

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And then all- all of a sudden you see, uh, Boobs take out what looks like a handgun and then-

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Jonathan- multiple times, but he's shooting him with bullets of necromancy.

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And then Jonathan comes back to life.

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Mostly it's the gun.

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He turns- he turns and says to everybody-

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I mean, I thought it was gonna be the staff and then the cheese, so the gun was a big surprise.

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Whoa.

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Is that an Orcus book?

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Oh, man, I was working so hard.

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I- I don't- I don't know, is that- is that what it says?

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I do the thing that Amy said, where I take Moot's finger and then I put it in my mouth,

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and I'm like, hmm, someone had mustard today.

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And then, yes.

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It was a hot German.

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Oh yeah, it was.

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Poke your head out, you see this, like, large, worm-like creature turn to you

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and it opens its tines and jumps towards your face.

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I pull my head back in, and then I start rolling the window back up.

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Welcome to Dumbgeons and Dragons.

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I'm your dungeon master, Rust More.

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He, him.

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Also with me today is Amy More.

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And first again, I was unprepared.

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Is Carla Maxted.

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She, her.

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Rust just wresting control of the podcast from us for a short while.

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I am playing Glim, Dragonborn PAlydin.

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And Amy More.

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Okay, I'm ready now.

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She, her, and I play Sullivan Slate, a lightfoot halfling rogue.

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He, him.

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And Tom Laird.

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He, him.

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And I play Moot.

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Also goes by He, him.

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And he's a half-orc, wild magic sorcerer.

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And back with us again this week because, well, they're part of the podcast now, so they said in the last episode.

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Yeah, we work here now.

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We've got from Speltlore, Abdulaziz.

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Hello, my name is Abdulaziz.

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He, him.

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I'm playing Boobs Frankenstein.

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And I am a human wizard who has a back tattoo of a wolf.

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And I'm a permanent cast member now.

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Hold on, is it lower back?

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No, it's full back mural.

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Oh, okay.

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But it's really close up.

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So it looks bad.

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So it just looks like hair?

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It's not close up with the face, yeah.

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It's not a close up of where you think.

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Yeah, it's not where you think it is.

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And Sean O'Hara.

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Hey, I'm Sean He, him.

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And I'm playing Bonesword, the undead ranger.

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Also He, him.

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So we covered a whole lot of ground in the last episode.

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It really hit those points.

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We're gonna dive into the lore here right after we beat whatever this monster is.

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But where we always dive into the lore first is over on Patreon.

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Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast.

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Where you also get an episode dedicated to you.

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Like today's patron, Neil Buse.

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Thanks, Neil.

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Thanks, Neil.

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You're awesome.

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Thanks, Neil.

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One time, Neil and I, we saved a small town in Wisconsin from being taken over by a corporation.

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So I'll tip my hat to you, Neil.

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Good job saving that town with the power of dance.

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Wow.

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Thanks, Neil.

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And Abdul.

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That was a team effort there is what that is.

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We're all touching.

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That's what our community's really all about.

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See, it's the mental roller coaster that we're setting up.

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Last week it was your bully.

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This week it was your heroics, you know, partnering in not crime, but you know.

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The opposite of that.

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Heroism.

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We did commit crimes.

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We were domestic terrorists.

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This is sounding more and more like Footloose.

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Dance terrorism.

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We've gone from Patrick Swayze to Kavin Bacon.

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What's going on here?

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Nine degrees of separation?

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Six degrees?

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All the degrees.

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Patreon.com slash dragon cast.

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Fuck it, let's play.

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So Bonesword, what you saw was this large worm-like creature with like this mouth that opens up like tentacles.

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You know in like Blade 3 with the dog that has the mouth that goes like this?

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That's what you see with this worm and there's like this beak on the inside.

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It rushed up and you quickly wheeled up the window.

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What everybody else sees is this face smash into the glass and like crack it, splinters it.

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And it's currently trying to coil itself around your carriage.

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So glim your head sticking up out of it.

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You see this, yeah.

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I was just looking in the other direction I guess.

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Yeah, yeah.

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I mean you didn't see it right away because you were so like wrapped up in what Boobs was saying.

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You were looking off in the distance.

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I was thinking a lot about whether Orcus was awesome or actually terrible.

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And then who would win in a dance battle.

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Exactly.

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Him or Bahamut.

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So you have a lot of important thoughts going on.

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We'll give first go to here to Bonesword.

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What's going on?

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When Bonesword rolls up the window and the worm slams into the window, he just goes,

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Worm!

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And starts trying to, he starts climbing over the back seat.

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To try and get up out of the sun roof that Glim is sticking out of right now.

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Get out of the way, there's a big worm.

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Can I try and fire breath it or do we have to roll initiative?

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Or are you shoving him back down because there's only room for one, damn it.

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Well I don't think I have to shove him back down.

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I'm a dragonborn, like I am big.

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I think he is doing the worm to try and like get up out of there because it's tight.

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It is not a large, this isn't a whole roof.

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It's not a panoramic sun roof.

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Are you shimmying up face to face?

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Butt to front.

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Butt to front, okay.

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I'm just curious, I want to get a visual.

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Just know what the visual is.

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Okay as Bonesword is trying to wiggle his way out, you can do what you like there Glim.

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Great.

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I'm going to look at my character sheet for the first time, hours it seems like.

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And I'm going to try to fire breath it.

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Okay.

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Do it, breathe fire on it.

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It has to make a dex save.

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It's just innocent people just wanting to pet your donkey.

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That's right and I lose it.

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They were not innocent people.

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You were agreeing there for a minute.

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Dex save 20, not natural.

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Fuck, it's a dextrous worm isn't it.

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Well I mean if you think about it.

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So I guess I shoot my fire breath and miss.

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Just miss.

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It's not even half.

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It goes right past it.

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I don't think so.

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I think I just miss.

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There was an area.

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No I lied.

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Takes half.

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It's not going to be very much guys.

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Better than a miss.

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Better than a miss.

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Oh!

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That's a pretty good roll.

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Ten so five.

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Five fire damage.

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First you see its skin really contract and bubble up and then you hear this wail

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as it moves to try and grab you or bite you with its beak.

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That's going to be an 18 to hit.

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That meets so beats I guess.

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Meets it beats.

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Five piercing damage to your probably just it probably you know

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just tries to go for your face but like grabs your shoulder.

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Okay well I'm unimpressed that he stood on me.

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Yeah.

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He did hard.

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Yeah.

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So he sits down and just does nothing for the rest of the ride.

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I pout for the rest of the ride.

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Well I guess that window looks cracked so what he's going to do is he's going to

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awkwardly retrieve his rapier I guess because it's shorter than other things

189
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and ready in action for if and when that window busts either through like the

190
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worm coming in or it squeezes the car enough to burst that window.

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You see the worm it's like it's coiling itself around but then you see

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more coils like almost like it's doubled in size or there's two of them

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now and it's crunching the sides in and the glass is shattering and

194
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cracking more that hasn't shattered through.

195
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Okay well then I'm still I so I wait.

196
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Okay Moot and Boobs you're sitting on laps.

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I'm Moot and Boobs.

198
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The crime fighting duo themselves.

199
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Oh god together they're Moots.

200
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So much action is happening around what are you two doing or what did one of you do?

201
00:09:30,200 --> 00:09:34,200
I think we haven't really noticed because the music is so loud.

202
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It's going I've had the time of my life.

203
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And this is the music of Orcus is emanating between us as we read this novel.

204
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What is it?

205
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A book of Orcus.

206
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Prophecy so it's a tome.

207
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So at least Boobs hasn't realized he's pretty into what we're doing.

208
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Whatever it is.

209
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I've noticed like I saw the fire breath out the window.

210
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So I know something's happening.

211
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So I'm going to cast mage armor on myself.

212
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Up my AC to 13.

213
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Sitting on top of Boobs lap.

214
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How does this how does it look when you cast it and what does Boobs see and feel I guess as you mage armor yourself.

215
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You see like kind of like a purplish like light kind of like pulse from within me.

216
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And I guess you get a little bit of it as well.

217
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Splashback.

218
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You're in the first row.

219
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Yeah, you've been creamed.

220
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I've been creamed.

221
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It is a bumpy ride.

222
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It will say as long as you're within sitting on or having him sit on your lap.

223
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It goes to him as well.

224
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You also get a plus one to your AC.

225
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That ain't bad.

226
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Like that.

227
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Okay, there are now two.

228
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One of them is going to continue to try and crush the vehicle that you are in the carriage the car or whatever we're calling it.

229
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And it's going to take nine damage.

230
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I have an indeterminate amount of damage that this vehicle can take.

231
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But I'll tell you when it's hit it.

232
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Sounds arbitrary.

233
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The one that has latched on to Glim, its tentacles begin to close around your shoulder.

234
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That's only a 10.

235
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Okay, I won't do it.

236
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That doesn't do it.

237
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So like these tentacles that you see them, they're swiping at you.

238
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They have like bladed pincers on the end of them.

239
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But you're dodging and weaving out of the way.

240
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Bonesword, we're back to you.

241
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Bonesword sees the worm thing that I'm desperately trying to remember the name of.

242
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Latch on to Glim.

243
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He yells, get out of here worm!

244
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And he pulls out one of his shortswords and starts stabbing upwards through the sunroof.

245
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Okay, two things.

246
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Did you want to roll to actually know the name or do you just want to keep calling it worm?

247
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Oh, actually I'm going to use Hunter Sense.

248
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Yeah, which as I can choose one creature I can see within 60 feet,

249
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I immediately learn whether the creature has any damage immunities, resistances, or vulnerabilities, and what they are.

250
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Okay, you recognize this creature as a Grick.

251
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It's a worm-like monstrosity that blends with rocky terrain.

252
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Damage resistances are bludgeoning, piercing, and slashing from non-magical attacks.

253
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Damn, that sucks for me.

254
00:12:41,200 --> 00:12:43,200
Roll to pierce it.

255
00:12:43,200 --> 00:12:45,200
Let's see how this goes.

256
00:12:45,200 --> 00:12:49,200
Well, I guess you could, we could, I mean, you said, it depends if you...

257
00:12:49,200 --> 00:12:50,200
Oh, no, okay.

258
00:12:50,200 --> 00:12:52,200
Oh, but it's resistant, right?

259
00:12:52,200 --> 00:12:54,200
Still takes half.

260
00:12:54,200 --> 00:12:56,200
It's not immune to anything that you're able to determine.

261
00:12:56,200 --> 00:13:00,200
Well, that's a six.

262
00:13:00,200 --> 00:13:04,200
So what does a bad miss look like when you...

263
00:13:04,200 --> 00:13:08,200
I stabbed the roof of the car a bunch of times.

264
00:13:08,200 --> 00:13:10,200
Glim, you just see it poking up and out.

265
00:13:10,700 --> 00:13:14,700
Not even really close to where the worm is.

266
00:13:14,700 --> 00:13:15,700
You're doing it blindly.

267
00:13:15,700 --> 00:13:17,700
Am I getting it?

268
00:13:17,700 --> 00:13:18,700
Get off of my...

269
00:13:18,700 --> 00:13:20,700
What the fuck, man?

270
00:13:20,700 --> 00:13:24,700
There's this thing that's crushing my stepdad's cart.

271
00:13:24,700 --> 00:13:26,700
He's gonna be so pissed.

272
00:13:26,700 --> 00:13:32,700
One of these Gricks is going to try to break the glass in the back where Sully is on the opposite side.

273
00:13:32,700 --> 00:13:34,700
Bring it.

274
00:13:34,700 --> 00:13:38,700
I don't know what this cart looks like or where I am in terms of other people.

275
00:13:39,200 --> 00:13:41,200
In my head, it's such a, like, amorphous...

276
00:13:41,200 --> 00:13:44,200
I'm nowhere and everywhere.

277
00:13:44,200 --> 00:13:46,200
Yeah, so that's a 22.

278
00:13:46,200 --> 00:13:54,200
It bursts through, glass shatters in, and it grabs you with its beak for a five piercing.

279
00:13:54,200 --> 00:13:58,200
Yet, but I readied an action as soon as the glass broke.

280
00:13:58,200 --> 00:14:00,200
It's behind you.

281
00:14:00,200 --> 00:14:02,200
Oh, it's behind you.

282
00:14:04,200 --> 00:14:05,200
Fuck.

283
00:14:05,700 --> 00:14:08,700
But it's like amorphous, I'm everywhere, nowhere.

284
00:14:08,700 --> 00:14:10,700
I specifically said from the other side.

285
00:14:10,700 --> 00:14:12,700
Yes, you did. Sorry, for five damage?

286
00:14:12,700 --> 00:14:13,700
Yes.

287
00:14:13,700 --> 00:14:15,700
That's practically all my hit points.

288
00:14:16,700 --> 00:14:20,700
It begins, you feel yourself being lifted from the seat. It's trying to pull you out of the vehicle.

289
00:14:20,700 --> 00:14:22,700
Not today, slithery bastard.

290
00:14:22,700 --> 00:14:24,700
I am going to...

291
00:14:27,700 --> 00:14:32,700
Hit it with my vorpal sword.

292
00:14:32,700 --> 00:14:34,700
It's a 27.

293
00:14:35,200 --> 00:14:44,200
So that's 10 damage, piercing damage, but I also want to do Divine Smite.

294
00:14:44,200 --> 00:14:48,200
So it also gets 2d8 radiant damage.

295
00:14:48,200 --> 00:14:50,200
Yeah, smite it divinely.

296
00:14:52,200 --> 00:14:55,200
So, that's 11 radiant damage.

297
00:14:55,200 --> 00:14:58,200
Describe to me what it looks like when you kill this one.

298
00:14:58,700 --> 00:15:07,700
Oh, well I stab into it, and then the radiant bahamanian energy flows through the vorpal sword into it.

299
00:15:07,700 --> 00:15:14,700
And it explodes, and a sort of thick, viscous, cream-like liquid explodes everywhere.

300
00:15:14,700 --> 00:15:18,700
And we're all just totally creamed.

301
00:15:20,700 --> 00:15:22,700
Bone sword goes, yeah!

302
00:15:23,700 --> 00:15:26,700
Bone, you got cream in your hole, that's sick.

303
00:15:27,200 --> 00:15:29,200
You gotta get up here man, you gotta get creamed.

304
00:15:29,200 --> 00:15:32,200
Alright, boobs, coming to the rescue. I'm gonna get creamed too.

305
00:15:34,200 --> 00:15:39,200
Hey, we're just here to say that we have a lovely podcast that we want to introduce you to.

306
00:15:39,200 --> 00:15:40,200
And it's called...

307
00:15:40,200 --> 00:15:42,200
Meddling with Monsters.

308
00:15:42,200 --> 00:15:46,200
Our tabletop RPG podcast using the Monster of the Week system.

309
00:15:46,200 --> 00:15:47,200
We love that system, don't we?

310
00:15:47,200 --> 00:15:48,200
We do love that system.

311
00:15:48,200 --> 00:15:50,200
Yeah, we've played it a couple times.

312
00:15:50,200 --> 00:15:54,200
And had a lot of fun, and they have a lot of fun on their podcast.

313
00:15:54,700 --> 00:15:58,700
You can join their heroes as they do battle against giant sea monsters.

314
00:15:58,700 --> 00:16:00,700
Evil corporations.

315
00:16:00,700 --> 00:16:03,700
And very poorly named pastries. Wait, what?

316
00:16:03,700 --> 00:16:10,700
They have exciting mysteries, engaging characters, full sound effects and original score for each episode.

317
00:16:10,700 --> 00:16:12,700
And new episodes every other Tuesday.

318
00:16:12,700 --> 00:16:16,700
Hey, that's convenient because we have new episodes every Wednesday.

319
00:16:16,700 --> 00:16:19,700
So you can listen to them on Tuesday, and then us on Wednesday.

320
00:16:19,700 --> 00:16:20,700
And that would be very good.

321
00:16:20,700 --> 00:16:23,700
So Meddling with Monsters. Find them wherever you download podcasts.

322
00:16:24,200 --> 00:16:27,200
Bobes, you turn around and you look and you see Sully.

323
00:16:27,200 --> 00:16:30,200
His legs are now up in the air as you're being pulled.

324
00:16:30,200 --> 00:16:32,200
Sully, you can take an action if you would like.

325
00:16:32,200 --> 00:16:34,200
As you're being pulled out of this vehicle.

326
00:16:34,200 --> 00:16:35,200
May I?

327
00:16:35,200 --> 00:16:37,200
I'm gonna hit it. Fuck off. Never mind.

328
00:16:37,200 --> 00:16:41,200
I know. I'm gonna hit it with my rapier for fifteen?

329
00:16:41,200 --> 00:16:43,200
Fifteen will hit.

330
00:16:43,200 --> 00:16:44,200
What?

331
00:16:44,200 --> 00:16:46,200
Oh, it's a four. Nine!

332
00:16:46,200 --> 00:16:47,200
That's a D6.

333
00:16:47,200 --> 00:16:48,200
That's a D6.

334
00:16:50,200 --> 00:16:52,200
Wait, you rolled a D6 and got an A.

335
00:16:52,700 --> 00:16:56,700
Amy's legitimate question of how do I play D&D at the start of the last session was fair.

336
00:16:58,700 --> 00:16:59,700
I'm not a liar.

337
00:17:00,700 --> 00:17:02,700
Oh, well that's more like it.

338
00:17:02,700 --> 00:17:03,700
Six.

339
00:17:03,700 --> 00:17:08,700
Sully's making wild moves at this creature that's trying to pull Sully out of the vehicle there, Boobs.

340
00:17:08,700 --> 00:17:13,700
Boobs is like, alright, get ready Worm, cause you're gonna get some of that chill touch.

341
00:17:14,700 --> 00:17:15,700
And I touch him.

342
00:17:17,700 --> 00:17:19,700
In a chill fashion.

343
00:17:19,700 --> 00:17:21,700
In a real chill kind of way.

344
00:17:22,200 --> 00:17:23,200
It looks like this.

345
00:17:23,200 --> 00:17:25,200
It's a gentle caress.

346
00:17:25,200 --> 00:17:27,200
That was chill.

347
00:17:27,200 --> 00:17:28,200
That was chill, yeah.

348
00:17:28,200 --> 00:17:30,200
Fucking chill touch, Orcus!

349
00:17:30,200 --> 00:17:32,200
Describe to me what chill touch does.

350
00:17:34,200 --> 00:17:36,200
You gotta know what it actually does, man.

351
00:17:38,200 --> 00:17:39,200
It's got a good name.

352
00:17:39,200 --> 00:17:41,200
There's so many rules in this game.

353
00:17:41,200 --> 00:17:42,200
What did I miss?

354
00:17:42,200 --> 00:17:43,200
Someone chilling?

355
00:17:43,200 --> 00:17:44,200
Chill touch.

356
00:17:44,200 --> 00:17:45,200
Chill touch.

357
00:17:45,200 --> 00:17:46,200
Literally nothing.

358
00:17:46,200 --> 00:17:48,200
Oh, alright, nice.

359
00:17:48,200 --> 00:17:51,200
Nice, you're playing the dungeon's way, I like it.

360
00:17:51,700 --> 00:17:52,700
Chill touch.

361
00:17:52,700 --> 00:17:56,700
You create a ghostly skeletal hand in the space of a creature within range.

362
00:17:56,700 --> 00:18:00,700
Make a ranged spell attack against the creature to assail it.

363
00:18:00,700 --> 00:18:02,700
Do I need to be doing this in character voice?

364
00:18:02,700 --> 00:18:04,700
Are you reading it from your book? I think that'd be great.

365
00:18:04,700 --> 00:18:06,700
I did just find it.

366
00:18:06,700 --> 00:18:08,700
The character voice, I mean.

367
00:18:08,700 --> 00:18:11,700
And the spell, Boobs says as he's flipping through the book.

368
00:18:12,700 --> 00:18:15,700
To assail it with the chill of the grave.

369
00:18:16,700 --> 00:18:17,700
Chill grave.

370
00:18:18,200 --> 00:18:21,200
On a hit, the target takes 1d8 necrotic damage.

371
00:18:21,200 --> 00:18:28,200
And it can't regain hit points until the start of your next turn.

372
00:18:28,200 --> 00:18:31,200
Until then, the hand clings to the target.

373
00:18:31,200 --> 00:18:35,200
How many of you doubt that I have average reading capacity?

374
00:18:38,200 --> 00:18:40,200
No, no, no, it's fine.

375
00:18:40,200 --> 00:18:42,200
So, roll a d20 for me.

376
00:18:42,200 --> 00:18:43,200
Alright, here we go.

377
00:18:43,200 --> 00:18:44,200
Wait, fuck.

378
00:18:44,200 --> 00:18:45,200
Here we go.

379
00:18:45,200 --> 00:18:46,200
Four.

380
00:18:46,200 --> 00:18:48,200
Which is okay, because you have a plus nine.

381
00:18:48,200 --> 00:18:51,700
So, you have struck the worm.

382
00:18:51,700 --> 00:18:52,700
Gently.

383
00:18:52,700 --> 00:18:53,700
Gently.

384
00:18:53,700 --> 00:18:54,700
Roll a d...

385
00:18:54,700 --> 00:18:55,700
Chill touch!

386
00:18:55,700 --> 00:19:00,700
Your 10th level, so roll 2d8 for damage, please.

387
00:19:01,700 --> 00:19:02,700
Alright.

388
00:19:04,700 --> 00:19:05,700
Six.

389
00:19:07,700 --> 00:19:08,700
And one.

390
00:19:08,700 --> 00:19:10,700
You see the flesh of this creature.

391
00:19:10,700 --> 00:19:12,700
You see your ghostly skeletal hand.

392
00:19:12,700 --> 00:19:16,700
But you see this flesh begin to, like, wither away beneath the hand.

393
00:19:16,700 --> 00:19:18,200
And you can see through it.

394
00:19:18,200 --> 00:19:23,200
It also lets out a wail and clamps down harder on Sully.

395
00:19:24,200 --> 00:19:24,700
Shit!

396
00:19:24,700 --> 00:19:27,200
God, Jesus, what you did made it worse!

397
00:19:27,200 --> 00:19:31,200
You're going to take an additional three piercing damage.

398
00:19:31,200 --> 00:19:33,200
As it bites harder into your shoulder.

399
00:19:33,200 --> 00:19:34,200
Fuck!

400
00:19:34,200 --> 00:19:35,200
Sorry.

401
00:19:35,200 --> 00:19:38,200
Oh God, I hope I have a cool scar after this.

402
00:19:38,200 --> 00:19:39,200
Can I...

403
00:19:39,200 --> 00:19:41,700
Do I have eyes on this weird worm monster?

404
00:19:41,700 --> 00:19:43,200
Does it look like it's hurt?

405
00:19:43,200 --> 00:19:47,200
Yeah, I mean, it's wrapped around the carriage, so you can see it.

406
00:19:47,200 --> 00:19:52,700
It's head is still in the back seat with Sully in mouth.

407
00:19:52,700 --> 00:19:54,200
So, yeah, you can see it.

408
00:19:54,200 --> 00:19:58,200
I'm going to, like, kick out the almost broken window.

409
00:19:58,200 --> 00:20:02,700
And then lean out and cast burning hands at this thing.

410
00:20:02,700 --> 00:20:05,700
When you kick out the window, you hear Bonesword go,

411
00:20:05,700 --> 00:20:06,700
Dude!

412
00:20:06,700 --> 00:20:07,700
No!

413
00:20:09,200 --> 00:20:10,700
Has to be done, Bonesword!

414
00:20:12,200 --> 00:20:14,200
It was broken anyway!

415
00:20:16,200 --> 00:20:18,200
Deck save against this bad boy.

416
00:20:18,200 --> 00:20:20,200
Not as good as the last deck save.

417
00:20:20,200 --> 00:20:21,200
That's nine.

418
00:20:21,200 --> 00:20:22,200
Not good enough.

419
00:20:22,200 --> 00:20:27,700
Also, the side of your stepdad's carriage will be a little bit burnt, FYI.

420
00:20:27,700 --> 00:20:29,700
It'll have sick flames on the side.

421
00:20:29,700 --> 00:20:32,200
It'll have sick flames on the side.

422
00:20:33,200 --> 00:20:36,200
So that is ten fire damage.

423
00:20:36,200 --> 00:20:40,200
Alright, describe to me what it looks like when you kill this Grick.

424
00:20:40,700 --> 00:20:46,700
It's like when you get barbecued eel at, like, a sushi restaurant.

425
00:20:46,700 --> 00:20:50,700
It just kind of looks like that and it falls off the side of the...

426
00:20:50,700 --> 00:20:53,200
Oh, I guess it's still hanging on to Sully.

427
00:20:53,200 --> 00:20:54,700
Is it still biting him?

428
00:20:54,700 --> 00:20:57,700
Well, I mean, it was actively biting Sully at the time.

429
00:20:57,700 --> 00:21:02,700
But, I mean, as it perishes and the sweet smell of...

430
00:21:02,700 --> 00:21:03,700
Grick.

431
00:21:03,700 --> 00:21:07,700
Of Grick perfumes up through the carriage.

432
00:21:07,700 --> 00:21:13,200
It releases its clamp and Sully's able to wriggle free from the maw of the Grick.

433
00:21:13,200 --> 00:21:18,200
Perfect. I didn't really want it to, like, fall to the wayside and drag Sully down with it.

434
00:21:18,200 --> 00:21:20,200
You guys just keep driving.

435
00:21:20,200 --> 00:21:23,200
Just dragged behind the vehicle.

436
00:21:23,200 --> 00:21:26,200
Yeah, Hyundai hasn't stopped. Hyundai's still going.

437
00:21:26,200 --> 00:21:30,200
The mule and the opossum are just, you know, business as usual.

438
00:21:30,200 --> 00:21:32,200
Just keep plowing on.

439
00:21:32,200 --> 00:21:36,200
All of you take a survey around and it appears that you're out of combat.

440
00:21:37,200 --> 00:21:38,700
Oh, God.

441
00:21:39,700 --> 00:21:41,700
That was not okay. What the fuck?

442
00:21:41,700 --> 00:21:44,700
No. Are you... How are you doing?

443
00:21:44,700 --> 00:21:47,700
Well, my shirt's ruined.

444
00:21:49,200 --> 00:21:57,700
Yeah. There's, like, quite a bit of, like, worm slobber, I guess, on your head or...

445
00:21:57,700 --> 00:21:58,700
Well...

446
00:21:58,700 --> 00:22:01,200
Some sort of digestive juices.

447
00:22:01,200 --> 00:22:04,200
They don't have tonsils in case you wanted to know that.

448
00:22:04,200 --> 00:22:04,700
Oh.

449
00:22:04,700 --> 00:22:05,700
Oh, that's good to know.

450
00:22:06,200 --> 00:22:09,200
They don't. No tonsils, so there's...

451
00:22:09,200 --> 00:22:11,200
See, you had your eyes open in there.

452
00:22:11,200 --> 00:22:13,200
Well, I mean...

453
00:22:13,200 --> 00:22:14,200
Yeah.

454
00:22:14,200 --> 00:22:15,200
Good for you.

455
00:22:15,200 --> 00:22:19,200
I'm real... You're brave and stuff.

456
00:22:19,200 --> 00:22:22,200
Does anybody have a potion?

457
00:22:22,200 --> 00:22:25,200
I think I have a healing spell.

458
00:22:25,200 --> 00:22:27,200
Oh, that would be lovely.

459
00:22:27,200 --> 00:22:28,700
I'm very curious.

460
00:22:28,700 --> 00:22:29,700
Healing.

461
00:22:29,700 --> 00:22:31,700
I was gonna say, I don't know what I gained.

462
00:22:31,700 --> 00:22:33,200
Alright, here we go. I found it.

463
00:22:33,200 --> 00:22:35,200
Wait, hold on a second.

464
00:22:35,200 --> 00:22:37,200
What's the name of the spell?

465
00:22:40,200 --> 00:22:42,200
Yeah, Booms is, like, flipping through.

466
00:22:42,200 --> 00:22:43,700
It's like, ah, fuck, okay.

467
00:22:43,700 --> 00:22:47,700
Bestow curse, blindness deafness, that doesn't seem like it.

468
00:22:47,700 --> 00:22:51,700
Cause fear, distort value, maybe?

469
00:22:51,700 --> 00:22:58,700
I don't know. I think you have to have values to start with in order for that one to make some sort of effect.

470
00:22:58,700 --> 00:23:01,700
What do we got? Faint death, that's not it.

471
00:23:01,700 --> 00:23:02,700
Ray of sickness.

472
00:23:02,700 --> 00:23:04,700
What? No, you said you could heal me. What is this?

473
00:23:05,200 --> 00:23:08,200
Life transference.

474
00:23:08,200 --> 00:23:09,200
Oh, what?

475
00:23:09,200 --> 00:23:10,200
Yeah, this is it.

476
00:23:10,200 --> 00:23:12,200
No. No, thank you. I don't like it.

477
00:23:12,200 --> 00:23:13,200
You sacrifice?

478
00:23:13,200 --> 00:23:14,200
I say no.

479
00:23:14,200 --> 00:23:16,200
Dude, where does it transfer from into? You gotta read that first.

480
00:23:16,200 --> 00:23:17,200
Yeah, that's a great question.

481
00:23:17,200 --> 00:23:22,200
That's true. Would you be taking it from Glim? She's got the most life span of all of us.

482
00:23:22,200 --> 00:23:26,200
You sacrifice some of your health to mend another creature's injuries.

483
00:23:26,200 --> 00:23:30,200
You take 48 necrotic damage, which can't be reduced in any way.

484
00:23:30,200 --> 00:23:32,200
Pretty cool.

485
00:23:32,700 --> 00:23:43,700
And one creature of your choice that you can see within range regains a number of hit points equal to twice the necrotic damage that you take.

486
00:23:43,700 --> 00:23:47,700
Okay, sorry. So you're gonna hurt yourself, essentially, with what I'm getting from this.

487
00:23:47,700 --> 00:23:53,700
Lots of jogging going on here. I mean, I speak it, but I'm gonna dumb it down for moot.

488
00:23:53,700 --> 00:23:55,700
Thanks, I appreciate that.

489
00:23:55,700 --> 00:23:59,700
Is that you're gonna hurt yourself and then I'm gonna get better?

490
00:23:59,700 --> 00:24:00,700
Yup.

491
00:24:01,200 --> 00:24:03,200
And you're gonna do that for me, boobies?

492
00:24:03,200 --> 00:24:05,200
I have a lot of hit points.

493
00:24:05,200 --> 00:24:07,200
You're so noble, you boobies.

494
00:24:07,200 --> 00:24:13,200
Well, I don't really understand the consequences of my actions, so let's figure out what is happening.

495
00:24:13,200 --> 00:24:17,200
Dude, I think this one's gonna hurt. I think this one hurts, like, a lot.

496
00:24:17,200 --> 00:24:19,200
I've never done this before.

497
00:24:19,200 --> 00:24:23,200
While you're casting, I take your book and I'm reading it really closely.

498
00:24:23,200 --> 00:24:25,200
No, wait!

499
00:24:25,200 --> 00:24:29,200
I'm doing it to impress moot, because I think I'm into... him?

500
00:24:29,200 --> 00:24:30,200
Oh, yeah.

501
00:24:30,200 --> 00:24:32,200
Okay, him. I'm into him.

502
00:24:32,200 --> 00:24:34,200
What's the casting time on this one?

503
00:24:34,200 --> 00:24:36,200
One action, so six seconds.

504
00:24:36,200 --> 00:24:38,200
Touch.

505
00:24:38,200 --> 00:24:41,200
I was hoping for another long wind, ten feet away.

506
00:24:41,200 --> 00:24:45,200
I mean, yeah, that's a full minute, yeah.

507
00:24:45,200 --> 00:24:49,200
So you roll 4d8 necrotic damage.

508
00:24:49,200 --> 00:24:58,200
And he's going to take those hit points from himself and give you twice that number.

509
00:24:59,200 --> 00:25:01,200
Is there a lower level?

510
00:25:01,200 --> 00:25:03,200
That's the lowest one.

511
00:25:03,200 --> 00:25:05,200
How many hit points you got there?

512
00:25:05,200 --> 00:25:07,200
I have 72.

513
00:25:07,200 --> 00:25:12,200
71 now, because I took one damage when I fell out of the cart and hit that tree.

514
00:25:15,200 --> 00:25:24,200
Also, I don't know how to use this internet platform, so I've just been remembering all of the numbers that I need to know that are changing.

515
00:25:24,200 --> 00:25:26,200
I don't know how to change the sheet.

516
00:25:26,200 --> 00:25:28,200
Oh, that's fine.

517
00:25:28,200 --> 00:25:35,200
I have a beautiful mind kind of thing going on where I know numbers really well and I can't read.

518
00:25:35,200 --> 00:25:38,200
You know, but I usually hear it's one or the other.

519
00:25:38,200 --> 00:25:41,200
I mean, Bahamut doesn't give with both hands.

520
00:25:41,200 --> 00:25:42,200
It's numbers or words.

521
00:25:42,200 --> 00:25:50,200
Bonesword, as you're flipping through his book, you see that he has a spell called false life, which is a little less invasive.

522
00:25:50,200 --> 00:25:53,200
Dude, dude, dude, dude, slow down, slow down.

523
00:25:53,200 --> 00:25:55,200
Shut the fuck up, I'm doing this.

524
00:25:55,200 --> 00:25:56,200
Dude, you're going to blow.

525
00:25:56,200 --> 00:25:58,200
You're blowing your load on this one.

526
00:25:58,200 --> 00:25:59,200
I'm blowing my load.

527
00:25:59,200 --> 00:26:00,200
Here we go.

528
00:26:00,200 --> 00:26:01,200
Get ready to get creamed, everybody.

529
00:26:01,200 --> 00:26:05,200
Who's like, whoa, I'm still on your lap.

530
00:26:05,200 --> 00:26:08,200
Six, two, two.

531
00:26:08,200 --> 00:26:09,200
OK, there you go.

532
00:26:09,200 --> 00:26:10,200
Roll low.

533
00:26:10,200 --> 00:26:12,200
Eight was the last one, which is the most you could get on that.

534
00:26:12,200 --> 00:26:14,200
So 18 total.

535
00:26:14,200 --> 00:26:15,200
It's not bad.

536
00:26:15,200 --> 00:26:20,200
I don't even have 32 hit points, let alone like that.

537
00:26:20,200 --> 00:26:23,200
My max is 21.

538
00:26:23,200 --> 00:26:26,200
Didn't you take like seven damage or something?

539
00:26:26,200 --> 00:26:29,200
I took eight.

540
00:26:29,200 --> 00:26:31,200
Again, he is an apprentice.

541
00:26:31,200 --> 00:26:32,200
He's very new at this.

542
00:26:32,200 --> 00:26:34,200
Show it off for his new friends.

543
00:26:34,200 --> 00:26:36,200
It's OK.

544
00:26:36,200 --> 00:26:39,200
You're like putting out a candle with a fire hose.

545
00:26:39,200 --> 00:26:43,200
Can I have all of them and have temporary hit points?

546
00:26:43,200 --> 00:26:45,200
You can bring back to full.

547
00:26:45,200 --> 00:26:46,200
So that's eight.

548
00:26:46,200 --> 00:26:49,200
Could I get some spray?

549
00:26:49,200 --> 00:26:52,200
Could there be some offspray for Carla?

550
00:26:52,200 --> 00:26:53,200
Sure.

551
00:26:53,200 --> 00:26:54,200
You know what?

552
00:26:54,200 --> 00:26:55,200
Why not?

553
00:26:55,200 --> 00:26:56,200
Everybody in the first two rows gets sprayed.

554
00:26:56,200 --> 00:26:57,200
Gets wet.

555
00:26:57,200 --> 00:26:58,200
That's right.

556
00:26:58,200 --> 00:27:00,200
Yeah.

557
00:27:00,200 --> 00:27:03,200
Replenish as you see fit.

558
00:27:03,200 --> 00:27:05,200
But not you, Boobs.

559
00:27:05,200 --> 00:27:11,200
Necrotic energy drains life from Boobs and it is creamed into the surrounding

560
00:27:11,200 --> 00:27:12,200
vicinity.

561
00:27:12,200 --> 00:27:13,200
That's a verb.

562
00:27:13,200 --> 00:27:15,200
I'm wiping necrotic cream out of my eyes.

563
00:27:15,200 --> 00:27:18,200
Boobs is looking a little saggy.

564
00:27:18,200 --> 00:27:24,200
You carry along on your path and you travel for an indeterminate amount of time.

565
00:27:24,200 --> 00:27:30,200
But you pull up through the forest path, which opens up into a wide clearing and you

566
00:27:30,200 --> 00:27:36,200
see a creek that cuts through this town that you're coming upon.

567
00:27:36,200 --> 00:27:42,200
But before you get to the town, you see a man standing at the entrance holding

568
00:27:42,200 --> 00:27:48,200
a scroll who sees you and his eyes light up when he sees your caravan, which looks

569
00:27:48,200 --> 00:27:53,200
to, they light up at first and then based on the amount of damage, kind of takes

570
00:27:53,200 --> 00:27:57,200
a step back and rushes towards your group.

571
00:27:57,200 --> 00:27:58,200
Oh, no.

572
00:27:58,200 --> 00:28:01,200
Is it Bonesword's stepdad?

573
00:28:01,200 --> 00:28:02,200
No, that's not Jerry.

574
00:28:02,200 --> 00:28:04,200
It's cool.

575
00:28:04,200 --> 00:28:06,200
I roll down the window and I lean out.

576
00:28:06,200 --> 00:28:08,200
Which window hasn't been broken yet?

577
00:28:08,200 --> 00:28:09,200
Probably a front one.

578
00:28:09,200 --> 00:28:10,200
Oh, yeah.

579
00:28:10,200 --> 00:28:11,200
Right.

580
00:28:11,200 --> 00:28:13,200
I just lean out the broken window.

581
00:28:13,200 --> 00:28:15,200
That moot kicked out like Captain America.

582
00:28:15,200 --> 00:28:17,200
That's right.

583
00:28:17,200 --> 00:28:19,200
Hey, what's up, dude?

584
00:28:19,200 --> 00:28:20,200
What?

585
00:28:20,200 --> 00:28:22,200
Is everything okay?

586
00:28:22,200 --> 00:28:23,200
No.

587
00:28:23,200 --> 00:28:25,200
Do you got a cart detailer here?

588
00:28:25,200 --> 00:28:26,200
We do, actually.

589
00:28:26,200 --> 00:28:27,200
They're closed today.

590
00:28:27,200 --> 00:28:28,200
It's a Sunday.

591
00:28:28,200 --> 00:28:30,200
But, you know, they'll be open tomorrow.

592
00:28:30,200 --> 00:28:32,200
But yeah, come in.

593
00:28:32,200 --> 00:28:33,200
We'll lead you in.

594
00:28:33,200 --> 00:28:35,200
We'll get your horse?

595
00:28:35,200 --> 00:28:36,200
Mule?

596
00:28:36,200 --> 00:28:37,200
A paws?

597
00:28:37,200 --> 00:28:39,200
It would take longer to explain than it's worth.

598
00:28:39,200 --> 00:28:40,200
What's up?

599
00:28:40,200 --> 00:28:41,200
Let's just go.

600
00:28:41,200 --> 00:28:42,200
Yeah, come on in.

601
00:28:42,200 --> 00:28:44,200
Hey, what brings you into town here?

602
00:28:44,200 --> 00:28:45,200
We're here for Orcus Party.

603
00:28:45,200 --> 00:28:46,200
Orcus Party 2020.

604
00:28:46,200 --> 00:28:47,200
A party?

605
00:28:47,200 --> 00:28:49,200
Oh, you're here for the gathering.

606
00:28:49,200 --> 00:28:51,200
Okay, yes, that's good.

607
00:28:51,200 --> 00:28:55,200
I have my own mission and my own wants and desires.

608
00:28:55,200 --> 00:29:00,200
Would you let me tell you a little bit about my journey?

609
00:29:00,200 --> 00:29:02,200
You know what?

610
00:29:02,200 --> 00:29:05,200
My instinct says no.

611
00:29:05,200 --> 00:29:07,200
But I'm willing to hear you out.

612
00:29:07,200 --> 00:29:08,200
My name is Doug.

613
00:29:08,200 --> 00:29:11,200
This used to be my town, Doug's Rest.

614
00:29:11,200 --> 00:29:12,200
My brother, Victor.

615
00:29:12,200 --> 00:29:14,200
He's since taken it.

616
00:29:14,200 --> 00:29:15,200
It's Victor'sville.

617
00:29:15,200 --> 00:29:18,200
If you would sign this petition...

618
00:29:18,200 --> 00:29:26,200
Are you standing at the entrance of the town in order to get strangers to sign your petition?

619
00:29:26,200 --> 00:29:29,200
Well, I'm hoping we become more than strangers.

620
00:29:29,200 --> 00:29:30,200
Maybe friends.

621
00:29:30,200 --> 00:29:31,200
Perhaps neighbors.

622
00:29:31,200 --> 00:29:37,200
Because in order to sign this petition and for it to mean something, you have to be residents of the town.

623
00:29:37,200 --> 00:29:43,200
So what I'm offering is selling you a small plot of land that you could call your own.

624
00:29:43,200 --> 00:29:45,200
It's not a huge investment.

625
00:29:45,200 --> 00:29:49,200
Only 50 gold amongst you.

626
00:29:49,200 --> 00:29:52,200
Totally doable.

627
00:29:52,200 --> 00:29:56,200
But then you're residents and you can sign the petition and I can get the name of the town back.

628
00:29:56,200 --> 00:30:05,200
But I mean, I think by bylaw 7B says that a resident has to live in a town for at least three months before they can do any legal paperwork.

629
00:30:05,200 --> 00:30:07,200
I had those very rules set up.

630
00:30:07,200 --> 00:30:08,200
Is this a scam?

631
00:30:08,200 --> 00:30:09,200
No.

632
00:30:09,200 --> 00:30:21,200
I think that they just want a signature for Simpson.

633
00:30:21,200 --> 00:30:23,200
Welcome to the middle.

634
00:30:23,200 --> 00:30:24,200
Welcome to the middle.

635
00:30:24,200 --> 00:30:26,200
Oh, I thought we were doing a duet.

636
00:30:26,200 --> 00:30:28,200
Oh, well, you missed the part then.

637
00:30:28,200 --> 00:30:29,200
What?

638
00:30:29,200 --> 00:30:32,200
Well, if we're doing a duet, then wouldn't you start at the same time I start?

639
00:30:32,200 --> 00:30:34,200
No, you'd like throw it to me.

640
00:30:34,200 --> 00:30:36,200
Okay, welcome to the middle.

641
00:30:36,200 --> 00:30:38,200
Welcome to the middle.

642
00:30:38,200 --> 00:30:40,200
This is what we talk about.

643
00:30:40,200 --> 00:30:42,200
The middle stuff.

644
00:30:42,200 --> 00:30:43,200
Yeah, see, that's good.

645
00:30:43,200 --> 00:30:45,200
Yeah, now that we should have talked about it before.

646
00:30:45,200 --> 00:30:47,200
This is what happens when you get just Russ and I.

647
00:30:47,200 --> 00:30:48,200
Yeah, it's good.

648
00:30:48,200 --> 00:30:50,200
I'm just going to serenade you with our sweet, sweet voices.

649
00:30:50,200 --> 00:30:51,200
That's right.

650
00:30:51,200 --> 00:30:52,200
All right.

651
00:30:52,200 --> 00:30:54,200
Well, this episode has spout lore in it.

652
00:30:54,200 --> 00:30:55,200
Yes.

653
00:30:55,200 --> 00:30:56,200
Sean and Abdul.

654
00:30:56,200 --> 00:31:03,200
And it's our second episode, which means it's our last episode for a little bit until we can convince them to come back, even though they seem pretty on board with it.

655
00:31:03,200 --> 00:31:04,200
Oh, they're into it.

656
00:31:04,200 --> 00:31:05,200
Yeah.

657
00:31:05,200 --> 00:31:06,200
Oh, definitely.

658
00:31:06,200 --> 00:31:09,200
We got them to record separately where you can find them.

659
00:31:09,200 --> 00:31:13,200
And we're going to throw to that right now.

660
00:31:13,200 --> 00:31:15,200
Sean and Abdul, you're from the podcast spout lore.

661
00:31:15,200 --> 00:31:19,200
Could you tell us a little bit about spout lore and what people are going to find when they come listen to you?

662
00:31:19,200 --> 00:31:21,200
Because you should go listen to them because they're amazing.

663
00:31:21,200 --> 00:31:22,200
Oh, thank you.

664
00:31:22,200 --> 00:31:30,200
Spout lore is a Dungeon World podcast that I have tried to describe so many times and failed.

665
00:31:30,200 --> 00:31:38,200
If I had to try, it would be if the events of Lord of the Rings were put in the hands of the cast of New Girl.

666
00:31:38,200 --> 00:31:39,200
That's a good description of it.

667
00:31:39,200 --> 00:31:40,200
Yeah.

668
00:31:40,200 --> 00:31:41,200
Okay.

669
00:31:41,200 --> 00:31:42,200
Okay.

670
00:31:42,200 --> 00:31:43,200
Who's the Schmidt?

671
00:31:43,200 --> 00:31:44,200
I'm the game.

672
00:31:44,200 --> 00:31:45,200
Yeah.

673
00:31:45,200 --> 00:31:46,200
I think I am.

674
00:31:46,200 --> 00:31:47,200
I think I am, unfortunately.

675
00:31:47,200 --> 00:31:49,200
I'm the game master, Abdul.

676
00:31:49,200 --> 00:31:54,200
I play Tuck, aka Tacoma Dome, the barbarian.

677
00:31:54,200 --> 00:31:57,200
And I don't talk with a New Jersey accent.

678
00:31:57,200 --> 00:32:01,200
I talk with my regular voice roughened up a little bit.

679
00:32:01,200 --> 00:32:06,200
So if the New Jersey accent was putting you off, it doesn't happen.

680
00:32:06,200 --> 00:32:09,200
I do it a lot.

681
00:32:09,200 --> 00:32:12,200
Well, you got to have a fallback, a go to character.

682
00:32:12,200 --> 00:32:13,200
Exactly.

683
00:32:13,200 --> 00:32:14,200
Yeah.

684
00:32:14,200 --> 00:32:24,200
But they can find you wherever you download podcasts and socials at www.spoutlore.com or www.

685
00:32:24,200 --> 00:32:26,200
No, that's our Patreon.

686
00:32:26,200 --> 00:32:27,200
I won't send you to our Patreon.

687
00:32:27,200 --> 00:32:28,200
Send it to the Patreon.

688
00:32:28,200 --> 00:32:29,200
Absolutely.

689
00:32:29,200 --> 00:32:30,200
No.

690
00:32:30,200 --> 00:32:31,200
Patreon.com.

691
00:32:31,200 --> 00:32:32,200
You guys.

692
00:32:32,200 --> 00:32:34,200
I have to because it's funny.

693
00:32:34,200 --> 00:32:38,200
www.spoutlore.com slash money please will take you to our Patreon.

694
00:32:38,200 --> 00:32:39,200
Perfect.

695
00:32:39,200 --> 00:32:40,200
All right.

696
00:32:40,200 --> 00:32:41,200
That's just your website.

697
00:32:41,200 --> 00:32:42,200
Money please.

698
00:32:42,200 --> 00:32:43,200
Here's what I'll say.

699
00:32:43,200 --> 00:32:46,200
All of our patrons, stop donating to us.

700
00:32:46,200 --> 00:32:47,200
Donate to Dumbgeons and Dragons.

701
00:32:47,200 --> 00:32:48,200
Yeah.

702
00:32:48,200 --> 00:32:49,200
Wrap it up, folks.

703
00:32:49,200 --> 00:32:50,200
We're done.

704
00:32:50,200 --> 00:32:51,200
We're done.

705
00:32:51,200 --> 00:32:52,200
Well, because now, I mean, you're a part of our podcast.

706
00:32:52,200 --> 00:32:53,200
Now you're part of the show.

707
00:32:53,200 --> 00:32:54,200
Now you're on this.

708
00:32:54,200 --> 00:32:55,200
So just bring them with you.

709
00:32:55,200 --> 00:32:56,200
We've been subsumed.

710
00:32:56,200 --> 00:32:57,200
So lovely.

711
00:32:57,200 --> 00:32:59,200
Thank you so much for being here with us, guys.

712
00:32:59,200 --> 00:33:01,200
And that's all we have for you right now.

713
00:33:01,200 --> 00:33:02,200
We'll get you back to the episode.

714
00:33:02,200 --> 00:33:03,200
Okay.

715
00:33:03,200 --> 00:33:04,200
Thanks.

716
00:33:04,200 --> 00:33:05,200
Bye-bye.

717
00:33:05,200 --> 00:33:06,200
Is this a scam?

718
00:33:06,200 --> 00:33:10,200
No, I want a signature so that the town can be named Doug's Rest again.

719
00:33:10,200 --> 00:33:12,200
How many signatures do you have already, Doug?

720
00:33:12,200 --> 00:33:13,200
I have four.

721
00:33:13,200 --> 00:33:15,200
One of them is my own.

722
00:33:15,200 --> 00:33:16,200
That's not a lot.

723
00:33:16,200 --> 00:33:17,200
I'm sorry.

724
00:33:17,200 --> 00:33:18,200
How many do you need?

725
00:33:18,200 --> 00:33:19,200
80.

726
00:33:19,200 --> 00:33:20,200
Damn, Doug.

727
00:33:20,200 --> 00:33:22,200
I thought the number was going to be a lot bigger though.

728
00:33:22,200 --> 00:33:24,200
Well, it's a small town.

729
00:33:24,200 --> 00:33:25,200
Okay.

730
00:33:25,200 --> 00:33:27,200
There's only like a hundred of us here.

731
00:33:27,200 --> 00:33:28,200
Wait a minute.

732
00:33:28,200 --> 00:33:32,200
You want us to pay you for our signatures is what you're telling us.

733
00:33:32,200 --> 00:33:37,200
Well, no, you're paying me for land.

734
00:33:37,200 --> 00:33:39,200
Land only goes up.

735
00:33:39,200 --> 00:33:43,200
Just look at the Vancouver market.

736
00:33:43,200 --> 00:33:44,200
It's out of control right now.

737
00:33:44,200 --> 00:33:45,200
It's out of control.

738
00:33:45,200 --> 00:33:48,200
See, Doug's Rest could be the next Vancouver.

739
00:33:48,200 --> 00:33:51,200
I, bone so it turns to everybody else, you know, there's something about this guy

740
00:33:51,200 --> 00:33:52,200
that I just don't trust.

741
00:33:52,200 --> 00:33:53,200
I say we do it.

742
00:33:53,200 --> 00:33:55,200
I start reach.

743
00:33:55,200 --> 00:33:56,200
I reach into my pocket.

744
00:33:56,200 --> 00:33:57,200
I start pulling coins out.

745
00:33:57,200 --> 00:33:58,200
Yeah, I have 10 coins.

746
00:33:58,200 --> 00:34:00,200
I'll put it all in.

747
00:34:00,200 --> 00:34:02,200
What color are your coins, Boob?

748
00:34:02,200 --> 00:34:04,200
It makes a difference.

749
00:34:04,200 --> 00:34:08,199
This one boobs looks up at you guys and is like, I have a confession to make.

750
00:34:08,199 --> 00:34:12,199
I'm colorblind and number dysLexic.

751
00:34:12,199 --> 00:34:15,199
You got a lot going on boobs.

752
00:34:15,199 --> 00:34:16,199
Yeah.

753
00:34:16,199 --> 00:34:17,199
I mean, like, but that's okay.

754
00:34:17,199 --> 00:34:19,199
We don't think any less of you.

755
00:34:19,199 --> 00:34:21,199
We all have our struggles.

756
00:34:21,199 --> 00:34:26,199
Possessions, a silver coin.

757
00:34:26,199 --> 00:34:28,199
I pull it out of my pocket.

758
00:34:28,199 --> 00:34:33,199
I say I, I found this one in the coin return of a vending machine at the last

759
00:34:33,199 --> 00:34:34,199
motel we stayed at.

760
00:34:34,199 --> 00:34:35,199
It was a real lucky break.

761
00:34:35,199 --> 00:34:37,199
And I'm willing to put it towards buying some property.

762
00:34:37,199 --> 00:34:38,199
Wow.

763
00:34:38,199 --> 00:34:39,199
Okay.

764
00:34:39,199 --> 00:34:41,199
So we got 10, 10 gold here, a silver.

765
00:34:41,199 --> 00:34:42,199
Anybody else?

766
00:34:42,199 --> 00:34:46,199
Well, I mean, like, if it was 10 gold a piece, that would, I'd be okay with that.

767
00:34:46,199 --> 00:34:48,199
What if I dropped the price?

768
00:34:48,199 --> 00:34:52,199
See, this just seems a little too willy nilly for my liking.

769
00:34:52,199 --> 00:34:54,199
I just want to get my town back, good sir.

770
00:34:54,199 --> 00:34:56,199
But again, you have four signatures.

771
00:34:56,199 --> 00:34:59,199
So for how long have you been collecting signatures?

772
00:34:59,199 --> 00:35:01,199
Well, we don't have a lot of visitors.

773
00:35:01,199 --> 00:35:04,199
Shouldn't you be trying to like talk to the people in the town?

774
00:35:04,199 --> 00:35:06,199
Yeah, talk to the people who live here.

775
00:35:06,199 --> 00:35:08,199
Yeah, they're all kind of on Victor's side.

776
00:35:08,199 --> 00:35:09,199
So I have to.

777
00:35:09,199 --> 00:35:10,199
Right.

778
00:35:10,199 --> 00:35:12,199
So why should we be on your side?

779
00:35:12,199 --> 00:35:14,199
Well, because we don't know Victor.

780
00:35:14,199 --> 00:35:15,199
Because you don't, you haven't met Victor.

781
00:35:15,199 --> 00:35:17,199
Why do they like Victor more than you?

782
00:35:17,199 --> 00:35:18,199
Tell us.

783
00:35:18,199 --> 00:35:19,199
Good question, boobs.

784
00:35:19,199 --> 00:35:31,199
Well, Victor raised wages, lowered taxes, made it so that people, you know, could fish in the creek.

785
00:35:31,199 --> 00:35:35,199
And generally improved everyone's life a whole lot.

786
00:35:35,199 --> 00:35:36,199
What a monster.

787
00:35:36,199 --> 00:35:38,199
Let's move on.

788
00:35:38,199 --> 00:35:40,199
Yeah, Victor sounds cool, man.

789
00:35:40,199 --> 00:35:41,199
Yeah.

790
00:35:41,199 --> 00:35:42,199
Victor sounds pretty cool.

791
00:35:42,199 --> 00:35:43,199
Okay.

792
00:35:43,199 --> 00:35:45,199
Alternately, how about this?

793
00:35:45,199 --> 00:35:52,199
You slit Victor's throat and I can bring him back to life and then you can control him, I think.

794
00:35:52,199 --> 00:35:53,199
Oh, now we're talking.

795
00:35:53,199 --> 00:35:55,199
I'm honestly not 100% sure how it works.

796
00:35:55,199 --> 00:35:58,199
I think part of the end really sells it.

797
00:35:58,199 --> 00:36:05,199
The two NPCs that we forgot that were there, Jonathan's like right on your heels and says, it's true.

798
00:36:05,199 --> 00:36:07,199
We put Jonathan in the trunk, I'm sure.

799
00:36:07,199 --> 00:36:09,199
Yeah, obviously.

800
00:36:09,199 --> 00:36:13,199
It just seems like something we would do.

801
00:36:13,199 --> 00:36:19,199
Okay, well, I mean, that sounds like you guys are staying for the conference, right?

802
00:36:19,199 --> 00:36:21,199
Okay, you say gathering conference.

803
00:36:21,199 --> 00:36:23,199
Guys, none of these things sound like a rager.

804
00:36:23,199 --> 00:36:26,199
I wasn't invited, so it could be a rager.

805
00:36:26,199 --> 00:36:27,199
I bet it will be.

806
00:36:27,199 --> 00:36:29,199
Yeah, probably.

807
00:36:29,199 --> 00:36:34,199
Well, if you got an extra plus one, I'll be standing by the sign.

808
00:36:34,199 --> 00:36:40,199
If you let us slit your throat, we can raise you and you can come.

809
00:36:40,200 --> 00:36:42,200
Roll persuasion.

810
00:36:46,200 --> 00:36:48,200
Yeah, let me see.

811
00:36:48,200 --> 00:36:53,200
Alternatively, I could look at my feature called Heart of Darkness.

812
00:36:53,200 --> 00:36:54,200
Sure.

813
00:36:54,200 --> 00:36:55,200
Yes.

814
00:36:55,200 --> 00:37:00,200
Where those who look into your eyes can see that you have faced unimaginable horror and that you are no stranger to darkness.

815
00:37:00,200 --> 00:37:05,200
Though they might fear you, commoners will extend you every courtesy and do their utmost to help you.

816
00:37:05,200 --> 00:37:08,200
I don't roll anything against that, it just happens.

817
00:37:08,200 --> 00:37:10,200
As far as I think you made this man, you tell me.

818
00:37:10,200 --> 00:37:11,200
It just happens.

819
00:37:11,200 --> 00:37:19,200
I think it makes sense that I should roll it though, but he is willing to hear me out because of the horrors that I have faced.

820
00:37:19,200 --> 00:37:22,200
Okay, tell me more.

821
00:37:22,200 --> 00:37:23,200
Tell me more.

822
00:37:23,200 --> 00:37:24,200
Well, that's a nine.

823
00:37:24,200 --> 00:37:26,200
Tell me a little more.

824
00:37:26,200 --> 00:37:30,200
Basically, what we do is murder you.

825
00:37:30,200 --> 00:37:31,200
Okay.

826
00:37:31,200 --> 00:37:34,200
Although you're letting us murder you, so it's more like euthanasia.

827
00:37:34,200 --> 00:37:39,200
We do that and then Boobs here does a pretty cool thing and then you come back and you're fucking sick.

828
00:37:39,200 --> 00:37:41,200
You can't feel pain anymore.

829
00:37:41,200 --> 00:37:42,200
You don't have to sleep.

830
00:37:42,200 --> 00:37:43,200
You don't have to eat.

831
00:37:43,200 --> 00:37:44,200
Well, you don't get to eat.

832
00:37:44,200 --> 00:37:45,200
That's kind of a downside.

833
00:37:45,200 --> 00:37:49,200
I don't feel the disappointment from my mother.

834
00:37:49,200 --> 00:37:52,200
No, dude, you're freed from the burden of life.

835
00:37:52,200 --> 00:37:54,200
That's what Orcus has to offer.

836
00:37:54,200 --> 00:37:55,200
Okay.

837
00:37:55,200 --> 00:37:56,200
Well, let me think on it.

838
00:37:56,200 --> 00:37:58,200
You guys are going to be here for at least a day.

839
00:37:58,200 --> 00:38:00,200
Yeah, you know where to find me.

840
00:38:00,200 --> 00:38:01,200
I'll find you.

841
00:38:01,200 --> 00:38:02,200
I'll find you.

842
00:38:02,200 --> 00:38:03,200
Okay.

843
00:38:03,200 --> 00:38:08,200
He's centered, walks, pondering, looking down at a scroll and counting his four signatures,

844
00:38:08,200 --> 00:38:11,200
one of which, two of which are his.

845
00:38:13,200 --> 00:38:15,200
He signed it as Doug and Victor.

846
00:38:15,200 --> 00:38:16,200
That's right.

847
00:38:16,200 --> 00:38:17,200
Even Victor's name is on here, you guys.

848
00:38:17,200 --> 00:38:18,200
He's not going to check it.

849
00:38:18,200 --> 00:38:19,200
Gotcha.

850
00:38:19,200 --> 00:38:21,200
You guys head into town.

851
00:38:21,200 --> 00:38:22,200
It is a small town.

852
00:38:22,200 --> 00:38:24,200
There's not many places.

853
00:38:24,200 --> 00:38:31,200
There is a gathering outside of what looks to be the Inn and Tavern, which is named...

854
00:38:32,200 --> 00:38:33,200
Oh, no.

855
00:38:33,200 --> 00:38:34,200
I don't have a name.

856
00:38:34,200 --> 00:38:35,200
I just had a laugh.

857
00:38:35,200 --> 00:38:36,200
We're coming up with a name.

858
00:38:36,200 --> 00:38:37,200
Sure.

859
00:38:37,200 --> 00:38:38,200
Oh, were you pointing at us for a name?

860
00:38:38,200 --> 00:38:39,200
Yes, he was.

861
00:38:39,200 --> 00:38:40,200
Applebee's.

862
00:38:40,200 --> 00:38:41,200
His name?

863
00:38:41,200 --> 00:38:42,200
Applebee's.

864
00:38:42,200 --> 00:38:46,200
Because there's a bunch of apples in the attic and a ton of bees.

865
00:38:46,200 --> 00:38:48,200
Yeah, they feel like a bee problem.

866
00:38:48,200 --> 00:38:50,200
It's a side honey business.

867
00:38:50,200 --> 00:38:51,200
And the attic is locked.

868
00:38:51,200 --> 00:38:55,200
It's owned by a lady named Gertrude Applebee.

869
00:38:55,200 --> 00:38:59,200
She is well-known for her cider that involves live bees.

870
00:38:59,200 --> 00:39:00,200
With the honey, right?

871
00:39:00,200 --> 00:39:01,200
In the consumption.

872
00:39:01,200 --> 00:39:02,200
Yeah.

873
00:39:02,200 --> 00:39:04,200
And also, there's bees in the cider.

874
00:39:04,200 --> 00:39:05,200
Adds texture.

875
00:39:05,200 --> 00:39:10,200
And if you get stung by a bee while you're in there, you get a free cup of cider.

876
00:39:10,200 --> 00:39:11,200
Oh, fun.

877
00:39:11,200 --> 00:39:12,200
Are you writing this down?

878
00:39:12,200 --> 00:39:15,200
Because that means the bee survived in the cider long enough for you to drink

879
00:39:15,200 --> 00:39:17,200
it alive, and that's good luck.

880
00:39:17,200 --> 00:39:19,200
Also, it tells to the freshness of it.

881
00:39:19,200 --> 00:39:21,200
She just makes a good product.

882
00:39:21,200 --> 00:39:22,200
Just quality.

883
00:39:22,200 --> 00:39:26,200
You head over there, and there's a wide variety of...

884
00:39:26,200 --> 00:39:30,200
It's an assorted bunch that you see just milling about outside as you pull up and

885
00:39:30,200 --> 00:39:31,200
hitch up.

886
00:39:31,200 --> 00:39:36,200
If you hitch up your mule and opossum, I'm not going to tell you how you treat your

887
00:39:36,200 --> 00:39:37,200
animals.

888
00:39:37,200 --> 00:39:39,200
Well, with respect and care.

889
00:39:39,200 --> 00:39:41,200
I hitch up the opossum, but not the mule.

890
00:39:41,200 --> 00:39:43,200
So I tie the opossum to a post.

891
00:39:43,200 --> 00:39:45,200
Well, they're attached, so I get it.

892
00:39:45,200 --> 00:39:48,200
And not like a string from the opossum to the pole.

893
00:39:48,200 --> 00:39:52,200
The opossum is tied to the pole.

894
00:39:52,200 --> 00:39:54,200
Upside down, so it feels comfortable.

895
00:39:54,200 --> 00:39:56,200
It's how he likes to sleep, yeah.

896
00:39:56,200 --> 00:39:58,200
How do these people look?

897
00:39:58,200 --> 00:40:01,200
Do they look radical, or do they look like...

898
00:40:01,200 --> 00:40:02,200
Are we talking golf?

899
00:40:02,200 --> 00:40:04,200
I'm imagining them.

900
00:40:04,200 --> 00:40:08,200
Yeah, there's a real new wave crowd about them.

901
00:40:08,200 --> 00:40:13,200
And then there's the mix of some more hooded, dark figures off in corners,

902
00:40:13,200 --> 00:40:15,200
quietly talking to themselves.

903
00:40:15,200 --> 00:40:18,200
But for the most part, they got a real cool vibe about them.

904
00:40:18,200 --> 00:40:22,200
So it's a real cool vibe apart from the hooded figures who are talking to

905
00:40:22,200 --> 00:40:23,200
themselves in the corners?

906
00:40:23,200 --> 00:40:24,200
Yeah.

907
00:40:24,200 --> 00:40:26,200
And all the bees.

908
00:40:26,200 --> 00:40:27,200
So many bees.

909
00:40:27,200 --> 00:40:28,200
So many bees.

910
00:40:28,200 --> 00:40:29,200
Everywhere.

911
00:40:29,200 --> 00:40:32,200
Oh, Amy would not be okay in this party.

912
00:40:32,200 --> 00:40:34,200
Man, this party's going to be fucking sick.

913
00:40:34,200 --> 00:40:35,200
I'm so excited.

914
00:40:35,200 --> 00:40:39,200
Anytime you see a bunch of bees, you know it's going to be a problem.

915
00:40:39,200 --> 00:40:41,200
It's buzzing with excitement.

916
00:40:41,200 --> 00:40:43,200
Is there food here?

917
00:40:43,200 --> 00:40:45,200
Oh yeah, there's a bunch of wings over here.

918
00:40:45,200 --> 00:40:47,200
Just a plate of wings.

919
00:40:47,200 --> 00:40:49,200
Just one plate of wings.

920
00:40:49,200 --> 00:40:51,200
Yeah, just one plate of wings.

921
00:40:51,200 --> 00:40:52,200
Yup.

922
00:40:52,200 --> 00:40:53,200
That's it.

923
00:40:53,200 --> 00:40:56,200
It sounds like not a lot of food for the amount of people who are here,

924
00:40:56,200 --> 00:40:57,200
but...

925
00:40:57,200 --> 00:40:59,200
I go and I take one wing and I just hold it.

926
00:40:59,200 --> 00:41:04,200
Yeah, that's going to become currency later.

927
00:41:04,200 --> 00:41:07,200
If I could smell, I'd be really enjoying the smell.

928
00:41:07,200 --> 00:41:10,200
Do you want me to eat it for you and fully describe the flavors that

929
00:41:10,200 --> 00:41:11,200
I'm tasting?

930
00:41:11,200 --> 00:41:12,200
Would you?

931
00:41:12,200 --> 00:41:13,200
I would absolutely do that.

932
00:41:13,200 --> 00:41:14,200
I would love that so much.

933
00:41:14,200 --> 00:41:15,200
Here you go.

934
00:41:15,200 --> 00:41:16,200
Okay.

935
00:41:16,200 --> 00:41:17,200
So I take a bite.

936
00:41:17,200 --> 00:41:18,200
Wait, hold on.

937
00:41:18,200 --> 00:41:19,200
Is it a wing?

938
00:41:19,200 --> 00:41:20,200
Is it a drumstick?

939
00:41:20,200 --> 00:41:21,200
What am I working with here?

940
00:41:21,200 --> 00:41:24,200
It's the wing part, but my thumb went through the middle,

941
00:41:24,200 --> 00:41:25,200
so it's kind of falling apart.

942
00:41:25,200 --> 00:41:27,200
It's like hinging, like a nutcracker.

943
00:41:27,200 --> 00:41:29,200
That makes me unhappy.

944
00:41:32,200 --> 00:41:35,200
The thought of someone poking their finger through the middle of a wing

945
00:41:35,200 --> 00:41:37,200
is just like, ah, ah, ah, why?

946
00:41:37,200 --> 00:41:38,200
A dead person.

947
00:41:38,200 --> 00:41:40,200
And then handing it to somebody else.

948
00:41:40,200 --> 00:41:41,200
They're like, yo, can you pass me that wing?

949
00:41:41,200 --> 00:41:42,200
Be like, sure.

950
00:41:45,200 --> 00:41:49,200
Sully has eaten in a while and got bit by a big worm,

951
00:41:49,200 --> 00:41:50,200
so he's going for it.

952
00:41:50,200 --> 00:41:53,200
He takes a bite off the side with the skin.

953
00:41:53,200 --> 00:41:55,200
Crunchy skin, real crunchy.

954
00:41:55,200 --> 00:41:57,200
It's got a good crisp to it.

955
00:41:57,200 --> 00:42:01,200
A little too salty, a little too salty.

956
00:42:01,200 --> 00:42:05,200
It's got some good like mesquite going on there.

957
00:42:05,200 --> 00:42:08,200
I think it was like maybe all apple smoked,

958
00:42:08,200 --> 00:42:10,200
I think is what I'm tasting here.

959
00:42:10,200 --> 00:42:11,200
Moot, taste one of these wings.

960
00:42:11,200 --> 00:42:12,200
He's going to know.

961
00:42:12,200 --> 00:42:15,200
He eats all the food.

962
00:42:15,200 --> 00:42:17,200
You've got a massive boner right now.

963
00:42:17,200 --> 00:42:19,200
Moot, can you just...

964
00:42:19,200 --> 00:42:20,200
It's an actual bone.

965
00:42:20,200 --> 00:42:21,200
That's my femur.

966
00:42:21,200 --> 00:42:24,200
Oh, that's probably now at a real wrong angle, my friend.

967
00:42:24,200 --> 00:42:26,200
It's, I can't get it back in.

968
00:42:26,200 --> 00:42:27,200
Fair enough.

969
00:42:27,200 --> 00:42:28,200
Sorry I brought it up.

970
00:42:28,200 --> 00:42:32,200
I think maybe they've used like a honey butter or something as well on these.

971
00:42:32,200 --> 00:42:34,200
Like, oh, they're just fantastic.

972
00:42:34,200 --> 00:42:35,200
Very delicious.

973
00:42:35,200 --> 00:42:36,200
I'm sorry you can't enjoy it.

974
00:42:36,200 --> 00:42:41,200
Did the description though, did that, is that like eating?

975
00:42:41,200 --> 00:42:42,200
Oh, yeah.

976
00:42:42,200 --> 00:42:44,200
I'm going to go sit down.

977
00:42:44,200 --> 00:42:45,200
Okay.

978
00:42:45,200 --> 00:42:50,200
This episode of Dumbgeons and Dragons is brought to you by Wapplebee's famous wings.

979
00:42:50,200 --> 00:42:54,200
Come get them with the honey flavor and there's bee flavors

980
00:42:54,200 --> 00:42:57,200
and sometimes there's like crispiness in there

981
00:42:57,200 --> 00:42:59,200
and then sometimes it's too salty.

982
00:42:59,200 --> 00:43:00,200
Come get some wings.

983
00:43:00,200 --> 00:43:01,200
That's right, Applebee's.

984
00:43:01,200 --> 00:43:05,200
If you want to sponsor us over here at Dumbgeons and Dragons,

985
00:43:05,200 --> 00:43:06,200
we'll describe wings.

986
00:43:06,200 --> 00:43:07,200
You know where to find us.

987
00:43:07,200 --> 00:43:08,200
You know where to find us.

988
00:43:08,200 --> 00:43:11,200
While this is happening, I've pulled out my pamphlets

989
00:43:11,200 --> 00:43:17,200
and I'm sort of like eyeing the crowd for who looks like a likely target

990
00:43:17,200 --> 00:43:19,200
for some chit chat about Bahamut

991
00:43:19,200 --> 00:43:23,200
and I think I'm probably going to approach one of those loners.

992
00:43:23,200 --> 00:43:24,200
Sure.

993
00:43:24,200 --> 00:43:25,200
Talking to themselves?

994
00:43:25,200 --> 00:43:27,200
Well, they need some company.

995
00:43:27,200 --> 00:43:29,200
Yeah, you head over to one of the dark corners

996
00:43:29,200 --> 00:43:33,200
where one of them is just kind of hunched over and talking.

997
00:43:33,200 --> 00:43:34,200
You hear them kind of rocking.

998
00:43:34,200 --> 00:43:35,200
You don't hear them rocking.

999
00:43:35,200 --> 00:43:38,200
You see them rocking and you hear them murmuring to themselves.

1000
00:43:38,200 --> 00:43:41,200
Raise the dead and then we're going to party after.

1001
00:43:41,200 --> 00:43:43,200
It's going to be a great time.

1002
00:43:43,200 --> 00:43:44,200
Hi.

1003
00:43:44,200 --> 00:43:46,200
Hi, it's so nice.

1004
00:43:46,200 --> 00:43:47,200
Hi.

1005
00:43:47,200 --> 00:43:48,200
Hi.

1006
00:43:48,200 --> 00:43:51,200
It looked like you could use maybe a little company.

1007
00:43:51,200 --> 00:43:54,200
And I don't know if you've heard, but the best company,

1008
00:43:54,200 --> 00:43:58,200
a guy who's like always with you in your heart

1009
00:43:58,200 --> 00:44:03,200
and in the world surrounding you with justice and love and peace is Bahamut.

1010
00:44:03,200 --> 00:44:04,200
I don't know if you've heard of him.

1011
00:44:04,200 --> 00:44:06,200
No.

1012
00:44:06,200 --> 00:44:08,200
I've got a pamphlet if you want to look.

1013
00:44:08,200 --> 00:44:12,200
He seems engaged in your pamphlet.

1014
00:44:12,200 --> 00:44:15,200
Glim has never had that reaction before.

1015
00:44:15,200 --> 00:44:16,200
It's her dream.

1016
00:44:16,200 --> 00:44:18,200
Doesn't know what to do.

1017
00:44:18,200 --> 00:44:19,200
Glim just freezes.

1018
00:44:19,200 --> 00:44:21,200
Cutscene 20 minutes later.

1019
00:44:21,200 --> 00:44:24,200
Can I have the pamphlet?

1020
00:44:28,200 --> 00:44:33,200
Glim's like, you can have all the pamphlets, throws them at him, runs.

1021
00:44:33,200 --> 00:44:36,200
All of you see you're kind of looking around the room.

1022
00:44:36,200 --> 00:44:39,200
I mean, Glim has gone off and is pamphleting people.

1023
00:44:39,200 --> 00:44:44,200
But you see there's one kind of eccentric individual kind of jumping back

1024
00:44:44,200 --> 00:44:48,200
and forth between people like they're perhaps the host of sorts.

1025
00:44:48,200 --> 00:44:52,200
And they catch your eye as you're having your wing.

1026
00:44:52,200 --> 00:44:56,200
You've gotten a cider by this point, for sure, if that's what you've ordered.

1027
00:44:56,200 --> 00:44:57,200
Oh, definitely.

1028
00:44:57,200 --> 00:45:00,200
He runs over, doesn't walk, runs over.

1029
00:45:00,200 --> 00:45:01,200
Pleasure to have you.

1030
00:45:01,200 --> 00:45:02,200
Nice to see you here.

1031
00:45:02,200 --> 00:45:03,200
What can I do for you?

1032
00:45:03,200 --> 00:45:04,200
Wow.

1033
00:45:04,200 --> 00:45:07,200
You just brought a very extreme energy and I'm here for it.

1034
00:45:07,200 --> 00:45:08,200
What's your name?

1035
00:45:08,200 --> 00:45:11,200
Jason.

1036
00:45:11,200 --> 00:45:12,200
Okay, Jason.

1037
00:45:12,200 --> 00:45:14,200
Jason Halfman Zoukas.

1038
00:45:14,200 --> 00:45:17,200
Jason Halfman Zoukas?

1039
00:45:17,200 --> 00:45:18,200
Right.

1040
00:45:18,200 --> 00:45:19,200
Right.

1041
00:45:21,200 --> 00:45:23,200
Why are you so excited?

1042
00:45:23,200 --> 00:45:24,200
Well, because we're here.

1043
00:45:24,200 --> 00:45:25,200
We're having this rager.

1044
00:45:25,200 --> 00:45:30,200
I mean, Lich Astley and the Magic Magic Missiles are going to be playing later tonight.

1045
00:45:31,200 --> 00:45:33,200
Is he ever going to give you up?

1046
00:45:33,200 --> 00:45:34,200
Never going to give you up.

1047
00:45:34,200 --> 00:45:35,200
Never going to let you down.

1048
00:45:35,200 --> 00:45:38,200
Orcas is going to rule all and then you won't desert you.

1049
00:45:38,200 --> 00:45:41,200
Well, that's what I hear about him.

1050
00:45:41,200 --> 00:45:44,200
Are you like this because of the cider?

1051
00:45:44,200 --> 00:45:45,200
Yeah, no, no.

1052
00:45:45,200 --> 00:45:51,200
Unlike this, it's a natural aura I give off and eventually people just kind of come up to it.

1053
00:45:51,200 --> 00:45:53,200
Yeah, I can feel myself getting there.

1054
00:45:53,200 --> 00:45:54,200
The room is vibrating.

1055
00:45:54,200 --> 00:45:56,200
Guys, my heart's beating real fast.

1056
00:45:56,200 --> 00:45:57,200
Did you get the gift baskets?

1057
00:45:57,200 --> 00:45:58,200
They are gift baskets.

1058
00:45:58,200 --> 00:45:59,200
They're bags.

1059
00:45:59,200 --> 00:46:00,200
I oversold it.

1060
00:46:00,200 --> 00:46:01,200
They're just bags.

1061
00:46:01,200 --> 00:46:02,200
What's in them?

1062
00:46:02,200 --> 00:46:03,200
You can go pick a bag.

1063
00:46:03,200 --> 00:46:04,200
Yeah.

1064
00:46:04,200 --> 00:46:06,200
And I push through the crowd and I run to the bags.

1065
00:46:06,200 --> 00:46:11,200
You're following Bonesword and there is a table and there happens to be one, two, three, four.

1066
00:46:13,200 --> 00:46:15,200
It's a regular plus two.

1067
00:46:15,200 --> 00:46:16,200
Seven.

1068
00:46:16,200 --> 00:46:17,200
There's seven bags left.

1069
00:46:17,200 --> 00:46:21,200
And as you get there, Jason's just over your shoulder.

1070
00:46:21,200 --> 00:46:22,200
You just get one.

1071
00:46:22,200 --> 00:46:23,200
Just pick one.

1072
00:46:23,200 --> 00:46:24,200
Are they all the same?

1073
00:46:24,200 --> 00:46:25,200
No.

1074
00:46:26,200 --> 00:46:27,200
Ooh.

1075
00:46:27,200 --> 00:46:31,200
Glim's wandered over because all of her friends were rushing towards the table.

1076
00:46:31,200 --> 00:46:32,200
She wanted to see what was going on.

1077
00:46:32,200 --> 00:46:34,200
You see there are seven bags.

1078
00:46:34,200 --> 00:46:35,200
Gosh.

1079
00:46:35,200 --> 00:46:36,200
Whoa.

1080
00:46:36,200 --> 00:46:37,200
You're new.

1081
00:46:37,200 --> 00:46:38,200
Yeah.

1082
00:46:38,200 --> 00:46:39,200
Have you heard about Orcus?

1083
00:46:39,200 --> 00:46:40,200
Have you heard about Bahamut?

1084
00:46:40,200 --> 00:46:42,200
Oh, let's go talk.

1085
00:46:42,200 --> 00:46:43,200
Let's talk.

1086
00:46:43,200 --> 00:46:44,200
Can I get a bag first?

1087
00:46:44,200 --> 00:46:45,200
Yeah, sure.

1088
00:46:45,200 --> 00:46:46,200
Take a bag.

1089
00:46:46,200 --> 00:46:47,200
Okay.

1090
00:46:47,200 --> 00:46:51,200
So you each open your bags one at a time around like it's a birthday party.

1091
00:46:51,200 --> 00:46:55,200
And it's everybody's birthday, but you have to open the presents one at a time, obviously.

1092
00:46:55,200 --> 00:46:56,200
You got to take turns.

1093
00:46:56,200 --> 00:46:57,200
Yeah.

1094
00:46:57,200 --> 00:46:58,200
This is a good way to do it.

1095
00:46:58,200 --> 00:47:00,200
You guys all know how those group birthday parties work.

1096
00:47:00,200 --> 00:47:02,200
The rules are you open one at a time.

1097
00:47:02,200 --> 00:47:06,200
So says Orcus and so says the Bahamut.

1098
00:47:06,200 --> 00:47:07,200
Or whatever it is.

1099
00:47:07,200 --> 00:47:12,200
I can't believe no one's made that joke before on this podcast.

1100
00:47:14,200 --> 00:47:16,200
Who let the gods out?

1101
00:47:17,200 --> 00:47:26,200
Bonesword, you're the first one to open your bag and you find in it what looks like a really great hat.

1102
00:47:26,200 --> 00:47:28,200
I put it on right away.

1103
00:47:28,200 --> 00:47:29,200
Chapeau.

1104
00:47:29,200 --> 00:47:33,200
I take off my backwards leather cap and put on the fancy hat.

1105
00:47:33,200 --> 00:47:37,200
A really great hat is a large, fantastic pirate hat with a bright red feather.

1106
00:47:37,200 --> 00:47:40,200
The feather is magically connected to the hat and cannot be removed.

1107
00:47:40,200 --> 00:47:45,200
The hat grants plus one on perception rolls, but disadvantaged to stealth checks.

1108
00:47:45,200 --> 00:47:50,200
Well, I mean, well, it's a loud hat.

1109
00:47:50,200 --> 00:47:54,200
Bonesword's taken the hat off his head and he's yanking on the feather.

1110
00:47:54,200 --> 00:47:56,200
And he's like, check it out.

1111
00:47:56,200 --> 00:47:57,200
It doesn't come off.

1112
00:47:57,200 --> 00:47:58,200
Oh, sick.

1113
00:47:58,200 --> 00:48:00,200
That's the coolest thing I've ever seen.

1114
00:48:00,200 --> 00:48:02,200
That is an indestructible hat.

1115
00:48:02,200 --> 00:48:06,200
And then when Bonesword puts it on, you hear very quietly.

1116
00:48:06,200 --> 00:48:16,200
I'm pumping my arms.

1117
00:48:16,200 --> 00:48:20,200
Over in the corner you just hear one guy is like, where'd all the rum go?

1118
00:48:23,200 --> 00:48:25,200
Oh no, Johnny Depp is here.

1119
00:48:27,200 --> 00:48:28,200
Sorry, we'll kick him out.

1120
00:48:28,200 --> 00:48:29,200
We'll get him out right away.

1121
00:48:31,200 --> 00:48:32,200
What's in your guys' bags?

1122
00:48:32,200 --> 00:48:35,200
It's not going to be cooler than this, but I still want to know.

1123
00:48:35,200 --> 00:48:42,200
Moot, you open up your bag and you find a strange amulet.

1124
00:48:43,200 --> 00:48:49,200
It's an unassuming amulet of unknown origin made from a strange deep green stone strung from a black string.

1125
00:48:49,200 --> 00:48:54,200
Something is strange about this thing, but you can't quite put your finger on what it is.

1126
00:48:57,200 --> 00:48:59,200
Cool. It's strange, everybody.

1127
00:48:59,200 --> 00:49:01,200
That's a really weird necklace, you goddamn Moot.

1128
00:49:02,200 --> 00:49:04,200
It makes me a little uncomfortable for some reason.

1129
00:49:05,200 --> 00:49:08,200
Not just because you're wearing it. I mean, it looks good on you.

1130
00:49:08,200 --> 00:49:09,200
Well, I haven't put it on yet.

1131
00:49:09,200 --> 00:49:11,200
It would look good on you if you did, is all I'm saying.

1132
00:49:11,200 --> 00:49:16,200
Jason pokes his head over your shoulder. He says, oh, you put that on and you get, I don't know what this means,

1133
00:49:16,200 --> 00:49:20,200
but you get resistance to necrotic damage. Additionally, the string is immune to all damage.

1134
00:49:21,200 --> 00:49:22,200
Who's Jason?

1135
00:49:22,200 --> 00:49:24,200
Jason Halfman-Zukas. He's the host.

1136
00:49:24,200 --> 00:49:25,200
I don't know why.

1137
00:49:25,200 --> 00:49:27,200
The very energetic fellow who ran up to us.

1138
00:49:27,200 --> 00:49:31,200
Yes, I don't know why I didn't think your name was Jason. I even repeated after you.

1139
00:49:31,200 --> 00:49:33,200
I'm not memorable. It's okay.

1140
00:49:34,200 --> 00:49:36,200
No, no, no, man. That's not what I'm saying.

1141
00:49:36,200 --> 00:49:39,200
Hold on. Russ, that's a pretty good Jason Manzinger.

1142
00:49:39,200 --> 00:49:40,200
Thank you.

1143
00:49:40,200 --> 00:49:41,200
I just want to say that's pretty good.

1144
00:49:41,200 --> 00:49:42,200
It's really good.

1145
00:49:43,200 --> 00:49:47,200
Who's next? Sully, you open up your bag.

1146
00:49:48,200 --> 00:49:57,200
I start, I just open it really slowly and I'm like, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da.

1147
00:49:58,200 --> 00:50:05,200
You find that you have, you open them up and there are hand wraps inside.

1148
00:50:05,200 --> 00:50:07,200
Wait, wraps? Wait, what?

1149
00:50:07,200 --> 00:50:12,200
Hand wraps. Like they're like a box of fabric that can wrap around your hands.

1150
00:50:12,200 --> 00:50:14,200
Did you just make that up to go along with my?

1151
00:50:14,200 --> 00:50:15,200
No.

1152
00:50:18,200 --> 00:50:19,200
It's on the page.

1153
00:50:19,200 --> 00:50:23,200
Oh, those ones give you, you know, when you get into little fisticuffs and you get to sprawl.

1154
00:50:23,200 --> 00:50:24,200
All the fucking time.

1155
00:50:24,200 --> 00:50:25,200
Punch a little bit harder.

1156
00:50:25,200 --> 00:50:28,200
You know, plus one to unarmed attacks.

1157
00:50:28,200 --> 00:50:30,200
Oh, I'm putting these on and I'm never taking them off.

1158
00:50:30,200 --> 00:50:31,200
They're going to get sweaty.

1159
00:50:31,200 --> 00:50:32,200
Yeah, they are.

1160
00:50:32,200 --> 00:50:34,200
Glam, you opened up yours.

1161
00:50:34,200 --> 00:50:36,200
What does your bag sound like as you're opening it?

1162
00:50:36,200 --> 00:50:38,200
It sounds like when you're in a theater.

1163
00:50:38,200 --> 00:50:39,200
I know it's hard to remember.

1164
00:50:39,200 --> 00:50:40,200
That was so long ago.

1165
00:50:40,200 --> 00:50:43,200
Probably anyone was in a theater, but someone's trying to open like a hard candy.

1166
00:50:43,200 --> 00:50:46,200
And for some reason, it is the loudest noise that exists in the world.

1167
00:50:46,200 --> 00:50:48,200
Because he's trying to do it quietly, but it means the worst.

1168
00:50:48,200 --> 00:50:50,200
You're doing it slowly.

1169
00:50:50,200 --> 00:50:52,200
But it's so loud.

1170
00:50:52,200 --> 00:50:53,200
It's so loud.

1171
00:50:53,200 --> 00:50:57,200
For some reason, it's just the texture of the bag.

1172
00:50:57,200 --> 00:51:01,200
Make a religion roll as you open your bag.

1173
00:51:01,200 --> 00:51:02,200
Heck yeah, I will.

1174
00:51:02,200 --> 00:51:04,200
It's Glam's time to shine.

1175
00:51:04,200 --> 00:51:05,200
That's right.

1176
00:51:05,200 --> 00:51:07,200
Buckle up, fuckers.

1177
00:51:09,200 --> 00:51:10,200
It's not that great.

1178
00:51:10,200 --> 00:51:12,200
Fifteen.

1179
00:51:12,200 --> 00:51:14,200
Would you believe I have a plus zero to religion?

1180
00:51:14,200 --> 00:51:15,200
Yeah, I know.

1181
00:51:15,200 --> 00:51:18,200
There's a coin inside this bag.

1182
00:51:18,200 --> 00:51:22,200
And on the coin, there is a holy symbol of Joaquin.

1183
00:51:22,200 --> 00:51:24,200
Phoenix?

1184
00:51:24,200 --> 00:51:26,200
The Joker himself, yes.

1185
00:51:26,200 --> 00:51:27,200
Yep.

1186
00:51:27,200 --> 00:51:29,200
It is now.

1187
00:51:29,200 --> 00:51:32,200
It's just the face of an unknown person.

1188
00:51:32,200 --> 00:51:34,200
And Half-Man Zookas comes over.

1189
00:51:34,200 --> 00:51:36,200
That's Joaquin.

1190
00:51:38,200 --> 00:51:39,200
Cool.

1191
00:51:39,200 --> 00:51:44,200
The coin's engravings are filled with a strange ash that will not wipe off.

1192
00:51:44,200 --> 00:51:50,200
So while using this spellcasting focus to make a spell attack from the cleric or pAlydin spell list,

1193
00:51:50,200 --> 00:51:55,200
you deal an additional 1d8 necrotic damage if the attack is a critical hit

1194
00:51:55,200 --> 00:51:59,200
or if the total is greater than the target's AC by five or more.

1195
00:51:59,200 --> 00:52:06,200
So for all your divine stuff, you get an extra d8 when you crit or get five above.

1196
00:52:06,200 --> 00:52:07,200
Cool.

1197
00:52:07,200 --> 00:52:08,200
Of necrotic.

1198
00:52:08,200 --> 00:52:13,200
Is the ash in there from the Ring of Fire?

1199
00:52:13,200 --> 00:52:15,200
Yes.

1200
00:52:15,200 --> 00:52:17,200
Did the flames go higher?

1201
00:52:17,200 --> 00:52:20,200
I mean, Joaquin fell into the Burning Ring of Fire.

1202
00:52:20,200 --> 00:52:22,200
Burn, burn, burn.

1203
00:52:22,200 --> 00:52:24,200
The flames went higher.

1204
00:52:24,200 --> 00:52:28,200
That was a deep walk through like that.

1205
00:52:28,200 --> 00:52:33,200
I like to make very vague and random references.

1206
00:52:33,200 --> 00:52:35,200
They'll get it.

1207
00:52:35,200 --> 00:52:39,200
It's just Johnny Cash listening to this.

1208
00:52:39,200 --> 00:52:40,200
It is.

1209
00:52:40,200 --> 00:52:42,200
And I try to just put one little...

1210
00:52:42,200 --> 00:52:44,200
We pander to our audience, we know.

1211
00:52:44,200 --> 00:52:48,200
Boobs, you open yours and there's a deck of cards inside of it.

1212
00:52:48,200 --> 00:52:49,200
Oh, shit.

1213
00:52:49,200 --> 00:52:50,200
It's God's card.

1214
00:52:50,200 --> 00:52:51,200
Cards.

1215
00:52:51,200 --> 00:52:52,200
Cards.

1216
00:52:52,200 --> 00:52:53,200
Is that what it is?

1217
00:52:53,200 --> 00:52:55,200
You got the deck of many things, friend.

1218
00:52:55,200 --> 00:52:56,200
You won big.

1219
00:52:56,200 --> 00:52:57,200
What does it do?

1220
00:52:57,200 --> 00:52:58,200
Well, hold on.

1221
00:52:58,200 --> 00:53:01,200
When you pull a card, there's a whole bunch of different...

1222
00:53:01,200 --> 00:53:03,200
I pull a card immediately.

1223
00:53:03,200 --> 00:53:04,200
Oh, my God.

1224
00:53:04,200 --> 00:53:05,200
Yes.

1225
00:53:05,200 --> 00:53:06,200
Okay.

1226
00:53:06,200 --> 00:53:07,200
Yes.

1227
00:53:07,200 --> 00:53:08,200
I don't wait for it to finish talking.

1228
00:53:08,200 --> 00:53:14,200
Also, I would like to say, I haven't said this yet, but it happened a while ago.

1229
00:53:14,200 --> 00:53:19,200
Boobs has like a baby bjorn that he put on John.

1230
00:53:19,200 --> 00:53:20,200
Oh, my God.

1231
00:53:20,200 --> 00:53:23,200
And he's been dangling in it for a while.

1232
00:53:23,200 --> 00:53:26,200
Also, Boobs is only four feet.

1233
00:53:26,200 --> 00:53:28,200
Perfect.

1234
00:53:28,200 --> 00:53:32,200
So really, if anything, Jonathan's wearing the baby bjorn and Boobs is...

1235
00:53:32,200 --> 00:53:34,200
Yeah, that's what it is.

1236
00:53:34,200 --> 00:53:37,200
Boobs has been dangling in the baby bjorn that John is wearing.

1237
00:53:37,200 --> 00:53:38,200
Amazing.

1238
00:53:38,200 --> 00:53:40,200
In the baby position.

1239
00:53:40,200 --> 00:53:41,200
In case that wasn't clear.

1240
00:53:41,200 --> 00:53:46,200
Have you been just strapping that into him during this whole thing and he's just like talking around you?

1241
00:53:46,200 --> 00:53:48,200
Like, oh, okay.

1242
00:53:48,200 --> 00:53:50,200
All right.

1243
00:53:50,200 --> 00:53:51,200
You've got a hat.

1244
00:53:51,200 --> 00:53:52,200
Whoa, okay.

1245
00:53:52,200 --> 00:53:53,200
That's tight.

1246
00:53:53,200 --> 00:53:55,200
Okay, you roll a d20 as you pull your card.

1247
00:53:55,200 --> 00:53:57,200
This could be really bad.

1248
00:53:57,200 --> 00:53:58,200
Or really great.

1249
00:53:58,200 --> 00:53:59,200
18.

1250
00:53:59,200 --> 00:54:01,200
I'm not even going to look at what it does.

1251
00:54:01,200 --> 00:54:04,200
I'm just going to tell you which card you pull and then we'll find out together.

1252
00:54:04,200 --> 00:54:08,200
You pull the Queen of Spades, which is your rail.

1253
00:54:08,200 --> 00:54:10,200
I'm going to say it's bad.

1254
00:54:10,200 --> 00:54:12,200
Your Yale.

1255
00:54:12,200 --> 00:54:14,200
Usually the black ones are bad.

1256
00:54:14,200 --> 00:54:19,200
The card's Medusa-like visage curses you.

1257
00:54:19,200 --> 00:54:24,200
You take a minus two penalty on saving throws while cursed this way.

1258
00:54:24,200 --> 00:54:29,200
Only a God or the Magic of the Fates card can end this curse.

1259
00:54:29,200 --> 00:54:32,200
Okay, I'll pull another card to try and get one of those.

1260
00:54:32,200 --> 00:54:36,200
Oh, okay.

1261
00:54:36,200 --> 00:54:38,200
Boob says bad impulse control.

1262
00:54:38,200 --> 00:54:40,200
The chaotic nature of this is great.

1263
00:54:40,200 --> 00:54:42,200
We're going to tank your podcast.

1264
00:54:42,200 --> 00:54:44,200
You're going to have to work your way out of this hole.

1265
00:54:44,200 --> 00:54:48,200
You roll one more and we'll see what happens.

1266
00:54:48,200 --> 00:54:50,200
Three.

1267
00:54:50,200 --> 00:54:54,200
Well, that's less bad, right?

1268
00:54:54,200 --> 00:54:55,200
TBD.

1269
00:54:55,200 --> 00:54:58,200
You pull the moon card.

1270
00:54:58,200 --> 00:54:59,200
Sounds good.

1271
00:54:59,200 --> 00:55:01,200
The moon is great.

1272
00:55:01,200 --> 00:55:03,200
The moon cycles.

1273
00:55:03,200 --> 00:55:04,200
Gotta love the moon.

1274
00:55:04,200 --> 00:55:05,200
Roll a D3.

1275
00:55:05,200 --> 00:55:09,200
So roll a D6 and then we'll have it.

1276
00:55:09,200 --> 00:55:11,200
Rolling again's a bad sign.

1277
00:55:11,200 --> 00:55:12,200
Six.

1278
00:55:12,200 --> 00:55:16,200
So you are granted the ability to cast the wish spell three times.

1279
00:55:16,200 --> 00:55:17,200
Okay, what does that do?

1280
00:55:17,200 --> 00:55:19,200
Can I give people wishes?

1281
00:55:19,200 --> 00:55:21,200
Is he a genie now?

1282
00:55:21,200 --> 00:55:23,200
Essentially you're a genie.

1283
00:55:23,200 --> 00:55:25,200
Oh, shit.

1284
00:55:25,200 --> 00:55:30,200
Okay, so you pull the moon card and Jason Halfman-Zuchas comes over to you and says,

1285
00:55:30,200 --> 00:55:32,200
Well, you're cursed.

1286
00:55:32,200 --> 00:55:34,200
But you have three wishes.

1287
00:55:34,200 --> 00:55:35,200
What are you going to do?

1288
00:55:35,200 --> 00:55:37,200
I can get three wishes?

1289
00:55:37,200 --> 00:55:38,200
You have three wishes.

1290
00:55:38,200 --> 00:55:41,200
So I can make three wishes any wishes I want?

1291
00:55:41,200 --> 00:55:42,200
Yes.

1292
00:55:42,200 --> 00:55:45,200
Before you say anything else, you can use them at any time.

1293
00:55:45,200 --> 00:55:47,200
So I don't have to use them all at once?

1294
00:55:47,200 --> 00:55:48,200
No.

1295
00:55:48,200 --> 00:55:51,200
Dude, Bonesword runs up.

1296
00:55:51,200 --> 00:55:52,200
He grabs boobs.

1297
00:55:52,200 --> 00:55:55,200
He's like, dude, we could do anything.

1298
00:55:55,200 --> 00:55:57,200
He puts his hand on my mouth and wrestles me with a grab.

1299
00:55:57,200 --> 00:55:58,200
Shut up.

1300
00:55:58,200 --> 00:55:59,200
And Jonathan, too.

1301
00:55:59,200 --> 00:56:00,200
Yeah, I've wrestled both of them to the ground.

1302
00:56:00,200 --> 00:56:01,200
Dude, shut up.

1303
00:56:01,200 --> 00:56:03,200
Do you understand what this means?

1304
00:56:03,200 --> 00:56:05,200
We're gods now.

1305
00:56:05,200 --> 00:56:11,200
Boobs is like, well, I'm going to use the first wish to make this the most epic party ever.

1306
00:56:11,200 --> 00:56:18,200
And he wishes for this to be the best party in the world with like everything added.

1307
00:56:18,200 --> 00:56:20,200
You hear the band kick up.

1308
00:56:20,200 --> 00:56:24,200
Lich Astley and the Magic Magic Missile starts playing that sweet, sweet hit.

1309
00:56:24,200 --> 00:56:26,200
Never going to give you up.

1310
00:56:26,200 --> 00:56:32,200
And that's what we fade out on as streamers are going, fireworks are going off.

1311
00:56:32,200 --> 00:56:34,200
They're barking, it's fucking wild.

1312
00:56:34,200 --> 00:56:39,200
The 60 people who are at this party are having the best fucking time of their lives.

1313
00:56:39,200 --> 00:56:42,200
60 people so far.

1314
00:56:42,200 --> 00:56:46,200
There's still 20 left in this town that hasn't shown up yet.

1315
00:56:56,200 --> 00:56:58,200
I'm thinking about you.

1316
00:56:58,200 --> 00:57:01,200
I'm thinking about you.

1317
00:57:01,200 --> 00:57:07,200
Every single minute, every day, the whole night through.

1318
00:57:07,200 --> 00:57:10,200
I want to be with you.

1319
00:57:10,200 --> 00:57:13,200
Say you want it too.

1320
00:57:13,200 --> 00:57:22,200
Every single minute, every day, until my life is through.

1321
00:57:26,200 --> 00:57:40,200
Dumbgeons and Dragons Season 2 Episode 93 is starring Amy More as Sully, Carla Max dead as Glim, Tom Laird as Moot, and Russ More as your dungeon master, with special guests Sean O'Hara as Bonesword and Abdul Aziz as Boobs Frankenstein.

1322
00:57:40,200 --> 00:57:47,200
Find more from Sean and Abdul by listening to Spelt Lore at speltlore.com or searching for spelt lore wherever you listen to podcasts.

1323
00:57:47,200 --> 00:57:50,200
Editing, production and sound design is by Russ More.

1324
00:57:50,200 --> 00:57:57,200
This episode featured music from Kavin MacLeod and Epidemic Sound, and sound effects from Epidemic Sound, Boom Library, and Sound Ideas.

1325
00:57:57,200 --> 00:58:08,200
A huge thank you to our supporting producers, Gabriel Lynch, Jessica Babyok, Kat Waterflame, Stevie, Jacob Madden, Devin Michaels, Christian Brown, Aaron Stevens, Lulahan, and Charlie Warley.

1326
00:58:08,200 --> 00:58:18,200
Support Dumbgeons and Dragons and our many other productions and get access to an exclusive podcast and bonus episodes, all while helping us unlock the special Grant's Flameykins episode,

1327
00:58:18,200 --> 00:58:25,200
Escaping the Abyss, when we reach 100 patrons at Patreon.com slash dumbdragoncast.

1328
00:58:25,200 --> 00:58:31,200
You can also follow us at facebook.com slash dumbdragoncast and on Instagram and Twitter at dumbdragoncast.

1329
00:58:31,200 --> 00:58:35,200
Thank you for listening. Have a great week. We'll talk again soon.

1330
00:58:48,200 --> 00:58:50,200
Your voice has been everywhere.

1331
00:58:50,200 --> 00:58:52,200
Shut the fuck up. I'm a good voice actor.

1332
00:58:52,200 --> 00:58:54,200
Hold on, wait, let me try again.

1333
00:58:54,200 --> 00:59:00,200
Bon, you got fucking cream in your hole. I can't remember it all. What did I sound like?

1334
00:59:00,200 --> 00:59:02,200
A little more Jewish grandmother.

1335
00:59:02,200 --> 00:59:06,200
Bon, fuck. This is how I do it.

1336
00:59:06,200 --> 00:59:09,200
You did New Jersey. You were doing a New Jersey accent.

1337
00:59:09,200 --> 00:59:12,200
It was kind of a New Jersey kind of thing.

1338
00:59:12,200 --> 00:59:14,200
Okay, this is how I sound.

1339
00:59:14,200 --> 00:59:16,200
Yeah, there it is.

1340
00:59:16,200 --> 00:59:18,200
You got there.

1341
00:59:18,200 --> 00:59:20,200
And you're willing to do that for me, boobs?

1342
00:59:20,200 --> 00:59:22,200
Shut up.

1343
00:59:22,200 --> 00:59:24,200
I have a lot of hit points.

1344
00:59:24,200 --> 00:59:27,200
Sorry, do you want me to say that again without a dog barking in it?

1345
00:59:27,200 --> 00:59:30,200
And you're gonna do that for me, boobs?

1346
00:59:30,200 --> 00:59:32,200
Man, I live...

1347
00:59:35,200 --> 00:59:37,200
The dog's just like, again.

1348
00:59:37,200 --> 00:59:39,200
One more time so you can do it better.

1349
00:59:39,200 --> 00:59:41,200
When you say boobs, I'm gonna bark.

1350
00:59:41,200 --> 00:59:43,200
Say it like you're mad at him.

1351
00:59:43,200 --> 00:59:45,200
Say it like you're underwater.

1352
00:59:45,200 --> 00:59:47,200
Okay, now can you do it, Elvis?

1353
00:59:47,200 --> 00:59:52,200
Okay, here we go. I wish for Orcus to get here right now and start this party.

1354
00:59:52,200 --> 00:59:55,200
I won't do that because I think it would ruin your game.

1355
00:59:55,200 --> 00:59:58,200
I was like, did he just plunge our babies into the darkness?

1356
00:59:58,200 --> 01:00:00,200
Wait, wait, wait.

1357
01:00:00,200 --> 01:00:02,200
Some things can't be forgiven, Abdul.

1358
01:00:02,200 --> 01:00:03,200
I won't do it.

1359
01:00:03,200 --> 01:00:06,200
Dumbgeons & Dragons is a Dumb Dragons production.