1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:02,000 WHO KNOWS HOW TO PLAY Dumbgeons and Dragons? 2 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:04,000 Ehh... kind of? 3 00:00:04,000 --> 00:00:06,000 Okay, so we kind of know how to play. 4 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:17,000 I will say a lot of what I have learned has been, if I have to make a new character, which happens all the time, because mine keep dying, then I check out DungeonCast. 5 00:00:17,000 --> 00:00:29,000 This is how I learned about Asimar, which I play in our Patreon-only games. They're awesome. They like fully break everything down, like this is what the class is, this is how it works, these are the pros and the cons, 6 00:00:29,000 --> 00:00:38,000 which is good to know, like, say you pick a ranger because it just seems fun and you don't really know that it maybe is the worst class, they could probably steer you clear of that. 7 00:00:38,000 --> 00:00:40,000 This is quite the testimonial. 8 00:00:40,000 --> 00:00:50,000 They have all the ins and outs of all the classes, all the monsters, all of the lore behind Dumbgeons and Dragons, and I'll be honest, I listen to them all the time. 9 00:00:51,000 --> 00:01:02,000 I listened to them quite a bit when we were first kind of really getting going so I could get a broader understanding of the other classes and the monsters and everything else, and it's really helpful stuff. 10 00:01:02,000 --> 00:01:07,000 Now, I haven't listened, but listening to all of you, this is something I should really do. 11 00:01:07,000 --> 00:01:08,000 Yeah, absolutely! 12 00:01:08,000 --> 00:01:09,000 And now I'm sold! 13 00:01:09,000 --> 00:01:16,000 Maybe I should just check out Druid, perhaps, like Barbarian... 14 00:01:16,000 --> 00:01:21,000 All of the things would be there and explained to you, and it wouldn't be coming from me, because we know that... 15 00:01:21,000 --> 00:01:24,000 Because I don't listen to the things that you tell me. 16 00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:31,000 But Will and Brian are the greatest, and they didn't put this in their copy notes, but you get to listen to their sultry, sexy voices, okay? 17 00:01:31,000 --> 00:01:32,000 Think about that. 18 00:01:32,000 --> 00:01:33,000 Triple sold. 19 00:01:33,000 --> 00:01:35,000 So, what are you doing? 20 00:01:35,000 --> 00:01:37,000 I hit the table! 21 00:01:37,000 --> 00:01:38,000 What are you doing? 22 00:01:38,000 --> 00:01:40,000 He's worked up, folks. 23 00:01:40,000 --> 00:01:45,000 Search The Dungeon Cast, wherever you download podcasts, or you can find them over on YouTube. 24 00:01:45,000 --> 00:01:47,000 You can see their faces! 25 00:01:47,000 --> 00:01:48,000 What?! 26 00:01:48,000 --> 00:01:54,000 This ad is brought to you by Demogorgon, Lord and Ruler of the Dungeon Cast and greatest, most undisputedly powerful demon lord in the known cosmos. 27 00:01:54,000 --> 00:01:56,000 I mean, that's disputable. We'll find out. 28 00:01:56,000 --> 00:01:58,000 All hail Demogorgon. 29 00:01:58,000 --> 00:02:04,000 Today's episode contains scenes of graphic violence, fear, and horror themes. 30 00:02:04,000 --> 00:02:06,000 Previously on Dumbgeons and Dragons. 31 00:02:06,000 --> 00:02:14,000 Those lucky enough to return would tell horrific tales of making it deep into these towns. 32 00:02:14,000 --> 00:02:19,000 Too deep to retreat when they found themselves surrounded by the townspeople. 33 00:02:19,000 --> 00:02:22,000 But not the townspeople. 34 00:02:22,000 --> 00:02:24,000 Undead. 35 00:02:24,000 --> 00:02:26,000 Shells of the people they once were. 36 00:02:26,000 --> 00:02:29,000 Welcome to the promised land, Miss Pip Diggins. 37 00:02:29,000 --> 00:02:37,000 Pip Diggins, this is Thanatos, the home of our Demon Prince and Lord of the Undead, Orcus. 38 00:02:37,000 --> 00:02:39,000 Why did you bring me to this cursed place? 39 00:02:39,000 --> 00:02:44,000 There are some beings with special abilities that the Demon Prince is taken an interest in. 40 00:02:44,000 --> 00:02:47,000 You, you are one of those beings. 41 00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:53,000 Your time will come, but for now Miss Pip Diggins, I encourage you to make yourself at home. 42 00:02:53,000 --> 00:03:02,000 Where there was world and earth and water was only pain and dread. 43 00:03:02,000 --> 00:03:04,000 The Abyss was here. 44 00:03:04,000 --> 00:03:06,000 And it's all we could see. 45 00:03:06,000 --> 00:03:13,000 Now the real fight begins. 46 00:03:13,000 --> 00:03:17,000 Welcome to Dumbgeons and Dragons. I'm your Dungeon Master, Russ More. He, him also with me. 47 00:03:17,000 --> 00:03:19,000 Today is Carla Maxted. 48 00:03:19,000 --> 00:03:25,000 She, her, tonight I am playing Lipsinki, Pip Diggins, a deep gnome warlock. 49 00:03:25,000 --> 00:03:27,000 What? 50 00:03:27,000 --> 00:03:28,000 Nice. 51 00:03:28,000 --> 00:03:32,000 And that means we have a very special guest with us, Kyle Claset from Bombarded. 52 00:03:32,000 --> 00:03:39,000 Hey, what's up? He, him, and yes, I will be reprising my role as Voronox, worshiper of... 53 00:03:39,000 --> 00:03:42,000 Oh, I forgot his name. I'm not a good worshiper at all. 54 00:03:42,000 --> 00:03:43,000 Oh no! 55 00:03:43,000 --> 00:03:45,000 It's Orcus. 56 00:03:45,000 --> 00:03:51,000 I really did just have a big brain fart just now. It's been a long day, but I'm ready to get into it. 57 00:03:51,000 --> 00:03:57,000 You can't see the Zoom call, but Orcus showed up behind Kyle in that moment, and now Kyle's gone. 58 00:03:57,000 --> 00:04:00,000 It's because I'm not wearing my Orcus shirt. 59 00:04:00,000 --> 00:04:05,000 I was just going to say that. It's the only time that I've seen you not wearing that shirt. 60 00:04:05,000 --> 00:04:06,000 Try to change it up. 61 00:04:06,000 --> 00:04:10,000 We've become complacent in our worship of Orcus, perhaps. 62 00:04:10,000 --> 00:04:12,000 Well, I think we can fix that. 63 00:04:12,000 --> 00:04:15,000 That's right. It's an easy fix, and you can fix it. 64 00:04:15,000 --> 00:04:18,000 When you're a patron, you go to Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast. 65 00:04:18,000 --> 00:04:22,000 You get an episode dedicated to you by the powers of Orcus. 66 00:04:22,000 --> 00:04:25,000 Today's patron... 67 00:04:25,000 --> 00:04:27,000 I'm not comfortable with this. 68 00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:29,000 Cheese Cat! 69 00:04:29,000 --> 00:04:32,000 Cheese Cat? Are you the best patron? 70 00:04:32,000 --> 00:04:34,000 I think so. 71 00:04:34,000 --> 00:04:38,000 Wow. Wow, that's just... 72 00:04:38,000 --> 00:04:39,000 Love it. 73 00:04:39,000 --> 00:04:40,000 Love it. 74 00:04:40,000 --> 00:04:41,000 And in this episode... 75 00:04:41,000 --> 00:04:43,000 The Orcus episode. 76 00:04:43,000 --> 00:04:45,000 Ah, yes. Thank you, Cheese Cat. 77 00:04:45,000 --> 00:04:47,000 Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast. 78 00:04:47,000 --> 00:04:49,000 And now, fuck it, let's play! 79 00:04:49,000 --> 00:04:50,000 Yeah. 80 00:04:50,000 --> 00:04:51,000 Let's do some evil. 81 00:04:51,000 --> 00:04:52,000 Please. 82 00:04:54,000 --> 00:04:59,000 We find ourselves falling through the realms and planes, 83 00:04:59,000 --> 00:05:06,000 flashing through the levels of heaven and hell and landing hard in the darkness of Thanatos. 84 00:05:06,000 --> 00:05:10,000 The 113th layer of the abyss. 85 00:05:10,000 --> 00:05:15,000 A chaotic cacophony rings out, deafening the senses. 86 00:05:15,000 --> 00:05:19,000 A frigid wind courses over the roiling landscape, 87 00:05:19,000 --> 00:05:24,000 and we pass over cities and fields filled with undead. 88 00:05:24,000 --> 00:05:30,000 We see in the distance a massive fortress built within a desolate mountain range. 89 00:05:30,000 --> 00:05:35,000 The landscape rolls forward over bubbling sludge-filled oceans 90 00:05:35,000 --> 00:05:39,000 and bordering on dry, bone-dust deserts. 91 00:05:41,000 --> 00:05:48,000 Cutting hard to a dark chamber, we see two figures kneeling with their heads lowered. 92 00:05:50,000 --> 00:05:54,000 A dark, booming voice rings out. 93 00:05:55,000 --> 00:06:00,000 The time has come, my children. 94 00:06:00,000 --> 00:06:05,000 The time for pain and suffering to end once and for all. 95 00:06:05,000 --> 00:06:11,000 There will be resistance, as you have seen before. 96 00:06:11,000 --> 00:06:18,000 There will be those who do not see our vision as we do. 97 00:06:19,000 --> 00:06:24,000 Feel pity and sorrow for them, 98 00:06:24,000 --> 00:06:31,000 but know they will see the truth and the freedom of the gift we bring. 99 00:06:34,000 --> 00:06:40,000 The scene cuts, and we see portals opening across the material plane, 100 00:06:40,000 --> 00:06:46,000 swirling, churning balls of energy that erupt into cities and villages. 101 00:06:46,000 --> 00:06:49,000 We see inside of Castle Waterdeep, 102 00:06:49,000 --> 00:06:53,000 where Lady Laryl Silverhand, Lord Neverember and Leosin 103 00:06:53,000 --> 00:06:58,000 are passing and discussing reports from neighboring regions that have gone silent. 104 00:06:58,000 --> 00:07:03,000 They hear an explosion ring out beyond the walls of Waterdeep. 105 00:07:03,000 --> 00:07:10,000 As the trio moves to the window, a force of air explodes the panes back towards the nobles who fall to the ground. 106 00:07:10,000 --> 00:07:14,000 They catch their breath and hear the bells ringing through the city, 107 00:07:14,000 --> 00:07:19,000 forces arming themselves and heading to the walls. 108 00:07:19,000 --> 00:07:22,000 The lower wards rush towards the gates, 109 00:07:22,000 --> 00:07:29,000 and many are not quick enough as the city watch must close them as we now see the rushing forces of undead. 110 00:07:29,000 --> 00:07:35,000 In the air, demons and spirits rush forward, scooping up men, women and children. 111 00:07:35,000 --> 00:07:40,000 Beasts skulk across the fields, ahead of the castle, 112 00:07:40,000 --> 00:07:46,000 as Waterdeep's wizards raise wards of protection up and over the city proper. 113 00:07:46,000 --> 00:07:52,000 Off on a hill we see one of these churning balls of energy, 114 00:07:52,000 --> 00:07:57,000 and out step Lipsinki and Varnas. 115 00:08:02,000 --> 00:08:08,000 Well, Lipsinki, I think it's your turn to give the command. 116 00:08:08,000 --> 00:08:11,000 Oh, do you mean it? I've been waiting so long. 117 00:08:11,000 --> 00:08:19,000 You've been very patient, and Orcus rewards those who wait, but are willing to listen. 118 00:08:19,000 --> 00:08:24,000 Well, you know now I'm willing to listen all the time. I love that big guy, Orcus. 119 00:08:24,000 --> 00:08:30,000 Okay, so remind me, do I have to, um, do I have to say specific words, 120 00:08:30,000 --> 00:08:34,000 or can I just kind of like let the Orcus spirit move through me to give the order? 121 00:08:34,000 --> 00:08:37,000 Well, you can definitely let the Orcus spirit move through you. 122 00:08:37,000 --> 00:08:41,000 You need but gesture, and your whim, which is the whim of Orcus, 123 00:08:41,000 --> 00:08:46,000 will be understood by the masses, which shall assail those who resist him. 124 00:08:46,000 --> 00:08:48,000 So cool. 125 00:08:48,000 --> 00:08:49,000 Isn't it, though? 126 00:08:49,000 --> 00:08:52,000 Okay, all right. 127 00:08:52,000 --> 00:08:53,000 So... 128 00:08:53,000 --> 00:08:54,000 Get in the zone. 129 00:08:54,000 --> 00:08:59,000 I'm gonna center myself. I'm gonna lift my hands in the air, and I'm gonna say... 130 00:08:59,000 --> 00:09:00,000 Good. 131 00:09:00,000 --> 00:09:03,000 Go get him, y'all! Go get him! 132 00:09:04,000 --> 00:09:08,000 Wonderfully done. Wonderfully done. 133 00:09:08,000 --> 00:09:13,000 And look, look at them. They're just going. They're just destroying everything. 134 00:09:13,000 --> 00:09:17,000 And look, they have no need. Yes, we are amidst war. 135 00:09:17,000 --> 00:09:23,000 War which usually takes life after life after life, fighting endlessly. 136 00:09:23,000 --> 00:09:28,000 They need not sleep. They need not food or shelter. 137 00:09:28,000 --> 00:09:32,000 They are provided for merely by the existence of Orcus. 138 00:09:32,000 --> 00:09:35,000 This is what we bring the world. 139 00:09:35,000 --> 00:09:39,000 We bring them this respite from the day in, day out, 140 00:09:39,000 --> 00:09:41,000 fighting against whatever may come their way. 141 00:09:41,000 --> 00:09:46,000 We take that, and we leave them of that punishment. 142 00:09:46,000 --> 00:09:51,000 It just feels good to free people from their day-to-day concerns. 143 00:09:51,000 --> 00:09:52,000 Absolutely. 144 00:09:52,000 --> 00:09:56,000 We're empowering folks, and it's really incredible what we're doing. 145 00:09:56,000 --> 00:10:00,000 I couldn't agree more, Lipsinki. One by one, day by day, 146 00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:05,000 the world will know true peace when it's all said and done. 147 00:10:08,000 --> 00:10:14,000 The forces are rushing forward and bashing up against the wizard's protection fields. 148 00:10:14,000 --> 00:10:21,000 And the longer it goes on, you see this field begin to shrink around the city. 149 00:10:21,000 --> 00:10:29,000 Day after day, it gets smaller, and the region of Waterdeep becomes smaller. 150 00:10:31,000 --> 00:10:34,000 The voice of Orcus comes back. 151 00:10:35,000 --> 00:10:40,000 In this war, they will call to their gods. 152 00:10:40,000 --> 00:10:44,000 Their calls will be unanswered. 153 00:10:46,000 --> 00:10:52,000 The gods and their arrogance have been hidden away, locked away, 154 00:10:52,000 --> 00:10:57,000 in chambers fueled by their own divine powers. 155 00:10:58,000 --> 00:11:03,000 Their efforts to escape are as futile as their following. 156 00:11:05,000 --> 00:11:12,000 And as their followers call out, plead out, as they search for their gods, 157 00:11:12,000 --> 00:11:16,000 those gods' presence will weaken, 158 00:11:16,000 --> 00:11:21,000 and their followers will feel the power of Orcus wash over them. 159 00:11:22,000 --> 00:11:24,000 Chaos reigns supreme! 160 00:11:25,000 --> 00:11:29,000 We have the power and the forces to outlast. 161 00:11:29,000 --> 00:11:34,000 We do not require sustenance. We do not require rest. 162 00:11:34,000 --> 00:11:39,000 We do not fall ill. Our wounded rise again. 163 00:11:40,000 --> 00:11:45,000 They will see this, and it will scare them at first. 164 00:11:46,000 --> 00:11:50,000 Show them the power. Show them the mercy that we bring. 165 00:11:50,000 --> 00:11:56,000 Show them what they can be, if they just give in. 166 00:11:58,000 --> 00:12:02,000 We cut to the balcony of Castle Waterdeep, 167 00:12:02,000 --> 00:12:05,000 now flying the flags of Orcus. 168 00:12:05,000 --> 00:12:08,000 Kneeling before Vorunax and Lipsinki, 169 00:12:08,000 --> 00:12:13,000 we see Lord Dagult Neverember, Conrad Bronenville, 170 00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:17,000 King Melendridge, and Tern Hornblade, 171 00:12:17,000 --> 00:12:21,000 all leaders within the Lord's Alliance. 172 00:12:21,000 --> 00:12:25,000 Out beyond them we see people broken, 173 00:12:25,000 --> 00:12:29,000 surrounded by undead soldiers. 174 00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:35,000 A sickening silence over this crowd, 175 00:12:36,000 --> 00:12:40,000 as Vorunax goes to greet the crowd. 176 00:12:41,000 --> 00:12:43,000 People of Waterdeep, 177 00:12:43,000 --> 00:12:48,000 you find yourselves on the verge of a true transformation, 178 00:12:48,000 --> 00:12:52,000 a world that has only been dreamed of. 179 00:12:54,000 --> 00:12:58,000 Your leaders submit themselves to us, 180 00:12:58,000 --> 00:13:03,000 prostrate themselves before Orcus, his right and left hand. 181 00:13:06,000 --> 00:13:08,000 You will know peace. 182 00:13:09,000 --> 00:13:11,000 We shall provide for you, 183 00:13:11,000 --> 00:13:17,000 exactly as Orcus would provide for me, for your leaders. 184 00:13:18,000 --> 00:13:20,000 There's no need to worry. 185 00:13:20,000 --> 00:13:23,000 Yes, you've seen bloodshed, you've seen terror. 186 00:13:23,000 --> 00:13:25,000 You will see it no more. 187 00:13:26,000 --> 00:13:30,000 We guarantee a path, 188 00:13:31,000 --> 00:13:33,000 a path to a new land. 189 00:13:33,000 --> 00:13:35,000 You must walk it, 190 00:13:35,000 --> 00:13:37,000 or find yourself, 191 00:13:39,000 --> 00:13:41,000 well, what am I saying? 192 00:13:41,000 --> 00:13:43,000 You're going to walk it one way or the other, 193 00:13:43,000 --> 00:13:45,000 whether you like it or not. 194 00:13:45,000 --> 00:13:47,000 Kneel. 195 00:13:49,000 --> 00:13:53,000 There's sounds of crying, 196 00:13:53,000 --> 00:13:55,000 coming from the crowd. 197 00:13:57,000 --> 00:14:00,000 And a few people slowly begin to kneel, 198 00:14:00,000 --> 00:14:02,000 but many others do not. 199 00:14:02,000 --> 00:14:06,000 They stare up at you and at your soldiers in defiance. 200 00:14:07,000 --> 00:14:12,000 I'm going to grab Lord Neverember and bring him to the edge of the balcony. 201 00:14:12,000 --> 00:14:15,000 For those who resist, 202 00:14:16,000 --> 00:14:21,000 would you like to see an example of what Orcus can truly do to you? 203 00:14:21,000 --> 00:14:24,000 Sure, you can resist if you want to, 204 00:14:24,000 --> 00:14:26,000 and you think you may become one of his pawns, 205 00:14:26,000 --> 00:14:29,000 one of his fledgling peoples. 206 00:14:29,000 --> 00:14:31,000 He doesn't have to do that for you. 207 00:14:31,000 --> 00:14:33,000 No, no, no. 208 00:14:33,000 --> 00:14:36,000 He can do much, much worse. 209 00:14:38,000 --> 00:14:40,000 Try me. 210 00:14:42,000 --> 00:14:45,000 Neverember looks like he goes to speak, 211 00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:49,000 but begins to cough. 212 00:14:49,000 --> 00:14:53,000 As you hear vocalizations start, 213 00:14:53,000 --> 00:14:56,000 and blood begins to pour from his mouth, 214 00:14:56,000 --> 00:15:00,000 and the crowd sees that his tongue has been torn out. 215 00:15:01,000 --> 00:15:04,000 Your leaders can no longer speak for you. 216 00:15:04,000 --> 00:15:06,000 They can't save you. 217 00:15:06,000 --> 00:15:08,000 Only Orcus can save you. 218 00:15:08,000 --> 00:15:10,000 Bend the knee. 219 00:15:10,000 --> 00:15:12,000 Take his mercy. 220 00:15:12,000 --> 00:15:16,000 You see some of the largest around the perimeter 221 00:15:17,000 --> 00:15:21,000 standing up and glaring at you in defiance. 222 00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:24,000 And they scream out, 223 00:15:24,000 --> 00:15:26,000 Now! 224 00:15:26,000 --> 00:15:29,000 And they begin to charge towards the castle 225 00:15:29,000 --> 00:15:33,000 and to the soldiers surrounding them. 226 00:15:34,000 --> 00:15:38,000 Very well, and I throw Lord Neverember off the balcony. 227 00:15:40,000 --> 00:15:45,000 You know, you'd think they'd have heard that it's futile to resist, 228 00:15:45,000 --> 00:15:46,000 but they don't. 229 00:15:46,000 --> 00:15:48,000 They just keep trying. 230 00:15:48,000 --> 00:15:50,000 And I gotta say, I kinda love it. 231 00:15:50,000 --> 00:15:53,000 It's so much more fun for us when there's, like, a bit of a show. 232 00:15:53,000 --> 00:15:55,000 It does make it more interesting. 233 00:15:55,000 --> 00:15:58,000 Wouldn't it be boring if they all just melt down 234 00:15:58,000 --> 00:16:02,000 and took Orcus' power and love and be crazy? 235 00:16:02,000 --> 00:16:04,000 It would be less entertaining. 236 00:16:04,000 --> 00:16:06,000 You're absolutely right, Lipsinki. 237 00:16:06,000 --> 00:16:11,000 So let's prepare ourselves and have a good time with it. 238 00:16:11,000 --> 00:16:13,000 It's one way or the other, we will convert them, 239 00:16:13,000 --> 00:16:16,000 and they will see the end. 240 00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:19,000 And they will see the light of Orcus. 241 00:16:20,000 --> 00:16:22,000 Yep, let's show them that light. 242 00:16:23,000 --> 00:16:27,000 Screams erupt from the crowd below, 243 00:16:27,000 --> 00:16:29,000 and those that were charging, 244 00:16:29,000 --> 00:16:33,000 those that haven't been struck down, stop. 245 00:16:33,000 --> 00:16:37,000 And they turn and stare towards Neverember's body, 246 00:16:37,000 --> 00:16:40,000 lifeless on the ground. 247 00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:45,000 The forces swell around them, 248 00:16:45,000 --> 00:16:47,000 and everyone looks up to you, 249 00:16:47,000 --> 00:16:51,000 and slowly they begin to take in me. 250 00:16:51,000 --> 00:16:53,000 See, Lipsinki, 251 00:16:53,000 --> 00:16:56,000 even those who don't want to listen after time 252 00:16:56,000 --> 00:16:59,000 can open their ears. 253 00:16:59,000 --> 00:17:02,000 I'm so proud that you opened yours so early on. 254 00:17:02,000 --> 00:17:04,000 You just can't fight the truth. 255 00:17:04,000 --> 00:17:08,000 At some point you just gotta realize that Orcus is the truth, 256 00:17:08,000 --> 00:17:13,000 and accept it, and take all the greatness that comes with that. 257 00:17:14,000 --> 00:17:17,000 You quote the scripture so well. 258 00:17:22,000 --> 00:17:27,000 Vorunax and Lipsinki walk towards the three remaining rulers, 259 00:17:27,000 --> 00:17:30,000 Conrad Bronnenville, King Melandrich, 260 00:17:30,000 --> 00:17:35,000 and Teren Hornblade, who look up at the two in disdain. 261 00:17:36,000 --> 00:17:38,000 Lipsinki, I've had a little bit of fun. 262 00:17:38,000 --> 00:17:40,000 Please, after you. 263 00:17:40,000 --> 00:17:42,000 Oh, thank you. 264 00:17:42,000 --> 00:17:44,000 This is a real honor, you guys. 265 00:17:44,000 --> 00:17:46,000 This is one of my first times getting to do this, 266 00:17:46,000 --> 00:17:49,000 so you kind of have a couple options. 267 00:17:49,000 --> 00:17:51,000 I mean, you don't really, 268 00:17:51,000 --> 00:17:53,000 because you're going to see the light of Orcus. 269 00:17:53,000 --> 00:17:55,000 Bottom line, that's what's going to happen. 270 00:17:55,000 --> 00:17:58,000 But you can do that willingly, 271 00:17:58,000 --> 00:18:06,000 and maybe hold onto some of your current power a little bit. 272 00:18:06,000 --> 00:18:11,000 Or, um, we can do it the hard way. 273 00:18:12,000 --> 00:18:15,000 And the hard way's kind of fun for us, 274 00:18:15,000 --> 00:18:17,000 so what do you think? 275 00:18:17,000 --> 00:18:19,000 You want to just submit? 276 00:18:19,000 --> 00:18:22,000 Bronnenville looks up at you, 277 00:18:22,000 --> 00:18:24,000 and sneers and says, 278 00:18:24,000 --> 00:18:28,000 we will never turn to your side. 279 00:18:28,000 --> 00:18:30,000 Oh, sweetie. 280 00:18:30,000 --> 00:18:32,000 I think you will. 281 00:18:32,000 --> 00:18:35,000 And I'm going to hurl him through hell. 282 00:18:35,000 --> 00:18:38,000 All right, describe hurl through hell. 283 00:18:38,000 --> 00:18:43,000 He's instantly transported through the lower planes. 284 00:18:43,000 --> 00:18:46,000 So he goes on this whirlwind magical tour 285 00:18:46,000 --> 00:18:49,000 through the lower planes in hell, 286 00:18:49,000 --> 00:18:52,000 comes back, pops back in where he was, 287 00:18:52,000 --> 00:18:57,000 and when he returns, he takes 10d10 psychic damage. 288 00:18:57,000 --> 00:19:01,000 To everyone else, Bronnenville disappears 289 00:19:01,000 --> 00:19:06,000 and returns a moment later, 290 00:19:06,000 --> 00:19:08,000 covered in blood. 291 00:19:08,000 --> 00:19:11,000 His eyes gouged out. 292 00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:15,000 He's lying on the ground, blood pooling beneath him. 293 00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:18,000 They see bones sticking out of him, 294 00:19:18,000 --> 00:19:23,000 and he's screaming for it to stop. 295 00:19:23,000 --> 00:19:27,000 So if I could translate your piteous screams, 296 00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:33,000 I think what you're saying is you'd like to work with Orcus. 297 00:19:33,000 --> 00:19:36,000 All right, can you maybe blink three times if... 298 00:19:36,000 --> 00:19:40,000 You look at his eyes, and they're just deep wells. 299 00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:45,000 Blood begins to pool up in his mouth. 300 00:19:45,000 --> 00:19:49,000 If only you would accept the mercy 301 00:19:49,000 --> 00:19:53,000 that Lipsynche is trying to provide you through Orcus. 302 00:19:53,000 --> 00:19:56,000 This pain would be over, and you too. 303 00:19:56,000 --> 00:19:59,000 You wouldn't have to suffer this. 304 00:19:59,000 --> 00:20:02,000 And not just this pain, all pain. 305 00:20:02,000 --> 00:20:07,000 Loneliness, when you stub your toe, 306 00:20:07,000 --> 00:20:14,000 fighting an undead army, being drawn in quarters, 307 00:20:14,000 --> 00:20:17,000 cut apart in very thin, thin little slices 308 00:20:17,000 --> 00:20:20,000 on one of those sort of rotating meat kind of slicers. 309 00:20:20,000 --> 00:20:23,000 I mean, not that pain either, no pain. 310 00:20:24,000 --> 00:20:30,000 You see King Melandrich begin to... 311 00:20:30,000 --> 00:20:33,000 Like, he begins to quiver. 312 00:20:33,000 --> 00:20:36,000 He's like, I could... 313 00:20:36,000 --> 00:20:39,000 You're horrid. 314 00:20:39,000 --> 00:20:41,000 Why are you doing this? What are you... 315 00:20:41,000 --> 00:20:44,000 What are you doing? Why are you here? 316 00:20:44,000 --> 00:20:47,000 I'll approach King Melandrich, and I'll kneel down, 317 00:20:47,000 --> 00:20:50,000 and I'll just say, listen, we are here 318 00:20:50,000 --> 00:20:57,000 because, well, you and your gods 319 00:20:57,000 --> 00:21:00,000 are no longer cutting it. 320 00:21:00,000 --> 00:21:03,000 So, we are cutting it. 321 00:21:03,000 --> 00:21:06,000 And by that we mean your tether to life. 322 00:21:06,000 --> 00:21:10,000 Now, you're a king on this plane, yes, correct, sure. 323 00:21:10,000 --> 00:21:13,000 Name, title, all of that given to you. 324 00:21:13,000 --> 00:21:14,000 But it must be nice. 325 00:21:14,000 --> 00:21:16,000 It must be nice to know that you can provide 326 00:21:16,000 --> 00:21:19,000 for the people that you care about. 327 00:21:19,000 --> 00:21:22,000 But what about everyone else? 328 00:21:22,000 --> 00:21:25,000 I've seen people squalor, people live in filth, 329 00:21:25,000 --> 00:21:29,000 muck and mire, too long. 330 00:21:29,000 --> 00:21:31,000 I spent my younger years traveling around, 331 00:21:31,000 --> 00:21:33,000 helping those people, spending my own time, 332 00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:36,000 just for them to be taken away. 333 00:21:36,000 --> 00:21:38,000 You could do something, and you've done nothing. 334 00:21:38,000 --> 00:21:42,000 Your gods have done nothing. 335 00:21:42,000 --> 00:21:45,000 He looks over to Teren Hornblade, 336 00:21:45,000 --> 00:21:47,000 who's kneeling beside him, 337 00:21:47,000 --> 00:21:50,000 aren't you going to do anything? 338 00:21:50,000 --> 00:21:55,000 Hornblade looks up at the two of you and says, 339 00:21:55,000 --> 00:21:59,000 I don't see anything we can do. 340 00:21:59,000 --> 00:22:01,000 Finally, some common sense out of one of you. 341 00:22:01,000 --> 00:22:03,000 It's the right attitude. 342 00:22:03,000 --> 00:22:05,000 Finally. 343 00:22:05,000 --> 00:22:07,000 It's all pros and no cons. 344 00:22:07,000 --> 00:22:08,000 I don't know why you wouldn't just say, 345 00:22:08,000 --> 00:22:11,000 yeah, or kiss me up. 346 00:22:11,000 --> 00:22:13,000 The arch tries to stand, 347 00:22:13,000 --> 00:22:19,000 and he spits up in your face, Farinauts. 348 00:22:19,000 --> 00:22:23,000 I wipe it off and look at it for a moment. 349 00:22:23,000 --> 00:22:25,000 Very well. 350 00:22:25,000 --> 00:22:27,000 You spitted my offer. 351 00:22:27,000 --> 00:22:29,000 Livsinky, book another trip. 352 00:22:29,000 --> 00:22:35,000 All right, buckle up. 353 00:22:35,000 --> 00:22:39,000 Teren, Teren, Teren. 354 00:22:39,000 --> 00:22:43,000 You seem to have come to your senses about all this, 355 00:22:43,000 --> 00:22:46,000 and I'd like to make you an offer. 356 00:22:46,000 --> 00:22:50,000 Now, unfortunately, your other three cohorts, 357 00:22:50,000 --> 00:22:52,000 they weren't interested. 358 00:22:52,000 --> 00:22:56,000 They couldn't see the path laid out in front of them. 359 00:22:56,000 --> 00:22:58,000 But I want to offer you something, 360 00:22:58,000 --> 00:23:00,000 a chance to lead. 361 00:23:00,000 --> 00:23:02,000 Maintain your position. 362 00:23:02,000 --> 00:23:05,000 Work underneath me and Livsinky. 363 00:23:05,000 --> 00:23:08,000 Lead as we have led. 364 00:23:08,000 --> 00:23:10,000 What's the catch? 365 00:23:10,000 --> 00:23:12,000 Oh, no catch, no catch. 366 00:23:12,000 --> 00:23:15,000 You need but submit yourself to Orcus. 367 00:23:15,000 --> 00:23:16,000 You will no longer have to sleep. 368 00:23:16,000 --> 00:23:18,000 You can spend your entire time leading 369 00:23:18,000 --> 00:23:21,000 and forging warriors on the field, 370 00:23:21,000 --> 00:23:24,000 and they will never tire either. 371 00:23:24,000 --> 00:23:26,000 How many times have you been frustrated 372 00:23:26,000 --> 00:23:34,000 by a weak ensign? 373 00:23:34,000 --> 00:23:39,000 I don't know what your end game is here. 374 00:23:39,000 --> 00:23:43,000 There won't be anything left to fight when you're done. 375 00:23:43,000 --> 00:23:45,000 Doesn't that sound wonderful? 376 00:23:45,000 --> 00:23:50,000 Doesn't it sound fantastic to not have to fight anymore? 377 00:23:50,000 --> 00:23:51,000 Aren't you tired? 378 00:23:51,000 --> 00:23:53,000 I know I am. 379 00:23:53,000 --> 00:23:55,000 I've been tired for a long time. 380 00:23:55,000 --> 00:23:57,000 But I still walk. 381 00:23:57,000 --> 00:23:58,000 I still carry myself. 382 00:23:58,000 --> 00:24:02,000 Nay, no, Orcus carries me. 383 00:24:02,000 --> 00:24:04,000 He could carry you too. 384 00:24:04,000 --> 00:24:09,000 It's a lot easier to be carried than it is to walk, my friend. 385 00:24:09,000 --> 00:24:14,000 Hornblade looks out over the crowd below 386 00:24:14,000 --> 00:24:18,000 as King Melandrich pops back in 387 00:24:18,000 --> 00:24:23,000 to the plane beside him. 388 00:24:23,000 --> 00:24:28,000 Before Melandrich passes out, 389 00:24:28,000 --> 00:24:30,000 he says, just do it. 390 00:24:30,000 --> 00:24:33,000 Whatever you're going to do. 391 00:24:33,000 --> 00:24:35,000 I'll serve Orcus. 392 00:24:35,000 --> 00:24:38,000 Oh, did you hear that, Lipsinki? 393 00:24:38,000 --> 00:24:42,000 Did you hear those dulcet tones? 394 00:24:42,000 --> 00:24:46,000 I'll serve Orcus. 395 00:24:46,000 --> 00:24:48,000 It's the best decision you're going to make. 396 00:24:48,000 --> 00:24:50,000 Your only regret is that you didn't decide 397 00:24:50,000 --> 00:24:54,000 to serve Orcus sooner. 398 00:24:54,000 --> 00:24:56,000 Stand up, Taron. 399 00:24:56,000 --> 00:24:59,000 He slowly stands to his feet. 400 00:24:59,000 --> 00:25:02,000 I undo any shackles or any bindings 401 00:25:02,000 --> 00:25:05,000 that we have on him. 402 00:25:05,000 --> 00:25:07,000 Trust begets trust. 403 00:25:07,000 --> 00:25:11,000 I want you to know you will be taken care of. 404 00:25:11,000 --> 00:25:13,000 Today you do not die. 405 00:25:13,000 --> 00:25:18,000 You will eventually, as will I, as will Lipsinki. 406 00:25:18,000 --> 00:25:22,000 We will turn you into one of his death knights. 407 00:25:22,000 --> 00:25:25,000 The power you hold now, your abilities, 408 00:25:25,000 --> 00:25:30,000 they pale in comparison to this 409 00:25:30,000 --> 00:25:32,000 remarkable improvement you will receive 410 00:25:32,000 --> 00:25:34,000 at the hand of Orcus. 411 00:25:34,000 --> 00:25:38,000 I promise you, you will not regret it. 412 00:25:38,000 --> 00:25:43,000 Do you have any family you would like to have considered 413 00:25:43,000 --> 00:25:48,000 for peaceful transfer? 414 00:25:48,000 --> 00:25:54,000 My wife, Laila, and my son, Nermal. 415 00:25:54,000 --> 00:25:58,000 I give you my word as the right hand of Orcus. 416 00:25:58,000 --> 00:26:06,000 They will not experience the horrors you've witnessed. 417 00:26:06,000 --> 00:26:10,000 I reach my hand out to shake his hand. 418 00:26:10,000 --> 00:26:12,000 He looks down at your hand, 419 00:26:12,000 --> 00:26:15,000 and then to his two fallen compatriots, 420 00:26:15,000 --> 00:26:19,000 and raises his hand to yours, 421 00:26:19,000 --> 00:26:22,000 grasps it firm. 422 00:26:22,000 --> 00:26:26,000 Good. Good men. 423 00:26:26,000 --> 00:26:31,000 Lipsinki, I believe our work here is coming to a close, 424 00:26:31,000 --> 00:26:33,000 and we've added to the ranks. 425 00:26:33,000 --> 00:26:36,000 It's always nice to get another powerful person 426 00:26:36,000 --> 00:26:39,000 willingly on the side of Orcus. 427 00:26:39,000 --> 00:26:41,000 I mean, they serve either way, 428 00:26:41,000 --> 00:26:44,000 but it's nice to have the willing folks, too. 429 00:26:44,000 --> 00:26:47,000 Absolutely. 430 00:26:47,000 --> 00:26:49,000 He told us they would resist. 431 00:26:49,000 --> 00:26:51,000 We knew they would, 432 00:26:51,000 --> 00:26:54,000 but we are still here to provide mercy. 433 00:26:54,000 --> 00:26:57,000 Come. Let's go. 434 00:26:57,000 --> 00:27:01,000 The three walk back into the castle 435 00:27:01,000 --> 00:27:07,000 and fade on the seam below. 436 00:27:07,000 --> 00:27:11,000 Welcome to the middle. 437 00:27:11,000 --> 00:27:16,000 Feeling real good about the day. 438 00:27:16,000 --> 00:27:18,000 Yeah. Yeah. 439 00:27:18,000 --> 00:27:22,000 Your words and your tone are contradictory. 440 00:27:22,000 --> 00:27:23,000 Yeah. 441 00:27:23,000 --> 00:27:25,000 I mean, I'm glad you're feeling good about the day, 442 00:27:25,000 --> 00:27:27,000 but you sound a little bit like... 443 00:27:27,000 --> 00:27:29,000 Like maybe you're passing a kidney stone. 444 00:27:29,000 --> 00:27:30,000 Anxiety. 445 00:27:30,000 --> 00:27:32,000 Yeah, that's it. Yep. 446 00:27:32,000 --> 00:27:35,000 The body language, too, is very... 447 00:27:35,000 --> 00:27:38,000 It was quenched. 448 00:27:38,000 --> 00:27:39,000 Yeah, that's good. 449 00:27:39,000 --> 00:27:42,000 Yeah, well, thanks everybody. 450 00:27:42,000 --> 00:27:44,000 Welcome to the middle. 451 00:27:44,000 --> 00:27:45,000 We're here. 452 00:27:45,000 --> 00:27:46,000 We're resting to you. 453 00:27:46,000 --> 00:27:47,000 We're resting to you, just briefly. 454 00:27:47,000 --> 00:27:49,000 Just a little kiss. 455 00:27:49,000 --> 00:27:51,000 Well, the middle's over. 456 00:27:51,000 --> 00:27:52,000 I'm shutting it down. 457 00:27:52,000 --> 00:27:54,000 The middle's over. 458 00:27:54,000 --> 00:27:55,000 Wait, wait. 459 00:27:55,000 --> 00:27:58,000 I'm putting up the right bar. 460 00:27:58,000 --> 00:28:00,000 I have excess. 461 00:28:00,000 --> 00:28:02,000 Hey, where I sing for reals, though, 462 00:28:02,000 --> 00:28:04,000 is on Patreon.com. 463 00:28:04,000 --> 00:28:07,000 Where there's a... 464 00:28:07,000 --> 00:28:08,000 Whole album. 465 00:28:08,000 --> 00:28:10,000 Yeah, more of an EP at the moment. 466 00:28:10,000 --> 00:28:13,000 I am working on building it out slowly, 467 00:28:13,000 --> 00:28:15,000 but the bass is there, 468 00:28:15,000 --> 00:28:17,000 so you can go take a look at that. 469 00:28:17,000 --> 00:28:20,000 But also, if you come join us on Patreon, 470 00:28:20,000 --> 00:28:22,000 we are working towards a new goal 471 00:28:22,000 --> 00:28:24,000 of 100 patrons in the community. 472 00:28:24,000 --> 00:28:26,000 What happens when we hit this goal, though? 473 00:28:26,000 --> 00:28:28,000 Yeah, that's wild. 474 00:28:28,000 --> 00:28:29,000 Something so delicious. 475 00:28:29,000 --> 00:28:32,000 A real kiss of deliciousness, if you will. 476 00:28:32,000 --> 00:28:33,000 Thank you, Carla. 477 00:28:33,000 --> 00:28:34,000 It had to be brought up again. 478 00:28:34,000 --> 00:28:35,000 We couldn't just let it go. 479 00:28:35,000 --> 00:28:37,000 A whisper of desire. 480 00:28:37,000 --> 00:28:39,000 A real kiss of deliciousness, 481 00:28:39,000 --> 00:28:43,000 where one character, that's me, 482 00:28:43,000 --> 00:28:46,000 and another character, yeah, me too, 483 00:28:46,000 --> 00:28:48,000 all join forces with three DMs 484 00:28:48,000 --> 00:28:50,000 who try to destroy them. 485 00:28:50,000 --> 00:28:52,000 Notice how we instantly stopped laughing 486 00:28:52,000 --> 00:28:54,000 when the Grantz's voice came out. 487 00:28:54,000 --> 00:28:55,000 Yeah, we were like, 488 00:28:55,000 --> 00:28:57,000 Ouch. 489 00:28:57,000 --> 00:29:01,000 However, that episode is delightful, 490 00:29:01,000 --> 00:29:03,000 and I can't wait for people to listen to it. 491 00:29:03,000 --> 00:29:04,000 I really want you to hear it. 492 00:29:04,000 --> 00:29:06,000 That's only 15 more patrons, you guys. 493 00:29:06,000 --> 00:29:07,000 No, it's not very many. 494 00:29:07,000 --> 00:29:08,000 It's so exciting. 495 00:29:08,000 --> 00:29:11,000 As of this moment, only 15 more patrons. 496 00:29:11,000 --> 00:29:12,000 Could be less. 497 00:29:12,000 --> 00:29:13,000 Could be less. 498 00:29:13,000 --> 00:29:15,000 Gosh, so you better get over to dumbdragons.com, 499 00:29:15,000 --> 00:29:19,000 no, Patreon.com slash dumbdragoncast, 500 00:29:19,000 --> 00:29:21,000 and join our Patreon, 501 00:29:21,000 --> 00:29:22,000 because it's dope over there, man. 502 00:29:22,000 --> 00:29:23,000 So many things. 503 00:29:23,000 --> 00:29:24,000 Love it. 504 00:29:24,000 --> 00:29:26,000 Hey, thank you for your support. 505 00:29:26,000 --> 00:29:28,000 Even if you can't join Patreon, 506 00:29:28,000 --> 00:29:29,000 if you share us, 507 00:29:29,000 --> 00:29:31,000 maybe somebody who you share to 508 00:29:31,000 --> 00:29:32,000 will be able to join. 509 00:29:32,000 --> 00:29:34,000 Yeah, and if you know that person, 510 00:29:34,000 --> 00:29:36,000 you can huddle around their phone 511 00:29:36,000 --> 00:29:38,000 and listen to the special 100 Patreon episode. 512 00:29:38,000 --> 00:29:39,000 There you go. 513 00:29:39,000 --> 00:29:40,000 That's right. 514 00:29:40,000 --> 00:29:41,000 Get your grandma on our Patreon. 515 00:29:41,000 --> 00:29:44,000 Don't take your grandma's credit card. 516 00:29:44,000 --> 00:29:47,000 Grandma's gonna love Flaming Kits, okay? 517 00:29:47,000 --> 00:29:49,000 Grandma's everywhere, love Flaming Kits. 518 00:29:49,000 --> 00:29:51,000 Yeah, we don't give grandmas enough credit. 519 00:29:51,000 --> 00:29:53,000 Ooh, I remember that fuck room. 520 00:29:53,000 --> 00:29:54,000 They've seen some stuff. 521 00:29:54,000 --> 00:29:55,000 They remember the fuck room. 522 00:29:55,000 --> 00:29:56,000 Come on. 523 00:29:56,000 --> 00:29:59,000 All right, that's enough for us for now, I guess. 524 00:29:59,000 --> 00:30:00,000 Yeah. 525 00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:01,000 Back to the episode. 526 00:30:01,000 --> 00:30:02,000 Thanks, everybody. 527 00:30:02,000 --> 00:30:03,000 Bye. 528 00:30:03,000 --> 00:30:04,000 Bye. 529 00:30:04,000 --> 00:30:05,000 Bye. 530 00:30:12,000 --> 00:30:15,000 We flash ahead eight years. 531 00:30:15,000 --> 00:30:19,000 You tell me, where are Vorunax and Lipsinki? 532 00:30:19,000 --> 00:30:22,000 At this point, a lot has passed, 533 00:30:22,000 --> 00:30:27,000 and we're probably in more so of a maintenance mode. 534 00:30:27,000 --> 00:30:30,000 Like every once in a while, something crops up. 535 00:30:30,000 --> 00:30:32,000 It's like, ah, roaches. 536 00:30:32,000 --> 00:30:33,000 Stomp them out. 537 00:30:33,000 --> 00:30:35,000 Yeah, so state of the world, 538 00:30:35,000 --> 00:30:36,000 pretty much except, yeah, 539 00:30:36,000 --> 00:30:40,000 a few small pockets still remain 540 00:30:40,000 --> 00:30:47,000 inhabited by those who have not been serving Orcus. 541 00:30:47,000 --> 00:30:50,000 So it's pretty quiet as far as, like, 542 00:30:50,000 --> 00:30:54,000 main assault and attack from a military standpoint. 543 00:30:54,000 --> 00:30:57,000 You want to hear how evil Vorunax is? 544 00:30:57,000 --> 00:30:58,000 Yep. 545 00:30:58,000 --> 00:31:01,000 Which we haven't been? 546 00:31:01,000 --> 00:31:06,000 I call out to the two undead servants that I keep nearby 547 00:31:06,000 --> 00:31:09,000 just to go and fetch things for me. 548 00:31:09,000 --> 00:31:12,000 And as I call them to go and, you know, 549 00:31:12,000 --> 00:31:17,000 fetch some scrolls or other tomes that I might need, 550 00:31:17,000 --> 00:31:22,000 we see the son and wife of Taran Hornblade. 551 00:31:24,000 --> 00:31:26,000 What is that you have there, Nermal? 552 00:31:26,000 --> 00:31:30,000 Nermal looks down and holds up a scroll 553 00:31:30,000 --> 00:31:33,000 and just hands it to you. 554 00:31:33,000 --> 00:31:37,000 I take it, roll it out. 555 00:31:38,000 --> 00:31:43,000 Oh, that's not what I expected today, but... 556 00:31:45,000 --> 00:31:49,000 Lipsynche, I've told you about Shang'alari, yes? 557 00:31:49,000 --> 00:31:52,000 Uh, I think so. 558 00:31:52,000 --> 00:31:54,000 A lich fella? 559 00:31:54,000 --> 00:31:59,000 Yeah, the one that I would hope that you would replace, 560 00:31:59,000 --> 00:32:00,000 given the opportunity. 561 00:32:00,000 --> 00:32:01,000 Right. 562 00:32:01,000 --> 00:32:03,000 Well on track, by the way. 563 00:32:03,000 --> 00:32:04,000 Thank you. 564 00:32:04,000 --> 00:32:11,000 There is work to be done that doesn't fall within the normal parameters. 565 00:32:11,000 --> 00:32:16,000 Well, to be honest, that sounds great. 566 00:32:16,000 --> 00:32:21,000 I mean, I love that we and Orcus, obviously by we, 567 00:32:21,000 --> 00:32:26,000 I mean Orcus has been so successful over the whole world. 568 00:32:27,000 --> 00:32:34,000 But just between you and me, it's a little bit boring. 569 00:32:34,000 --> 00:32:38,000 Don't you kind of want to remember the old days 570 00:32:38,000 --> 00:32:45,000 and we'd go and, you know, we killed her husband. 571 00:32:45,000 --> 00:32:46,000 I didn't kill, you know. 572 00:32:46,000 --> 00:32:48,000 No, no, I get what you're saying. 573 00:32:48,000 --> 00:32:50,000 He promoted him within the power of Orcus, 574 00:32:50,000 --> 00:32:55,000 but it's a bit dull these days with just everyone following Orcus. 575 00:32:55,000 --> 00:33:00,000 So are you saying something a bit unusual might be brewing? 576 00:33:00,000 --> 00:33:02,000 It is a bit unusual. 577 00:33:02,000 --> 00:33:04,000 And honestly, I could use a little bit of work out. 578 00:33:04,000 --> 00:33:05,000 The scales have been getting a little tight 579 00:33:05,000 --> 00:33:07,000 with all the sitting around that's happened. 580 00:33:07,000 --> 00:33:10,000 And I've had to loose out my armor a bit here and there, 581 00:33:10,000 --> 00:33:14,000 but I understand what you mean. 582 00:33:14,000 --> 00:33:16,000 Careful. 583 00:33:16,000 --> 00:33:18,000 You do not want to speak heresy. 584 00:33:18,000 --> 00:33:20,000 Yes, of course. 585 00:33:20,000 --> 00:33:29,000 I'm so happy that Orcus has been accepted by so many, 586 00:33:29,000 --> 00:33:33,000 but we just don't need to work as hard converting folks. 587 00:33:33,000 --> 00:33:34,000 It's true. 588 00:33:34,000 --> 00:33:38,000 So we haven't quite been rewarded yet. 589 00:33:38,000 --> 00:33:41,000 We haven't earned our reward yet. 590 00:33:41,000 --> 00:33:44,000 So in the meantime, you know, 591 00:33:44,000 --> 00:33:48,000 it's more paperwork than I thought there'd be, kind of more. 592 00:33:48,000 --> 00:33:54,000 I'm very surprised of the bureaucratic rigmarole that Orcus employs, 593 00:33:54,000 --> 00:33:57,000 but I mean, he gets results. 594 00:33:57,000 --> 00:33:59,000 That's right. I'm not questioning it. 595 00:33:59,000 --> 00:34:00,000 I'm sure it's all very important. 596 00:34:00,000 --> 00:34:04,000 It's just, you know, filling everything out in five pliquette. 597 00:34:04,000 --> 00:34:05,000 It's a lot. 598 00:34:05,000 --> 00:34:09,000 And so, yeah, sorry. 599 00:34:09,000 --> 00:34:10,000 You were saying. 600 00:34:10,000 --> 00:34:11,000 Shangalar. 601 00:34:12,000 --> 00:34:19,000 Shangalar, I would think that your paperwork would actually be pushed forward 602 00:34:19,000 --> 00:34:23,000 a little bit if we were able to go take care of this menace. 603 00:34:23,000 --> 00:34:29,000 Yes, employed by Orcus, but has his own streak about him. 604 00:34:29,000 --> 00:34:38,000 And it's very unbecoming of one of Orcus's more upper tier followers. 605 00:34:38,000 --> 00:34:44,000 So what say you we go re-kill someone? 606 00:34:44,000 --> 00:34:48,000 That sounds like just the kind of thing I've been looking to do. 607 00:34:48,000 --> 00:34:50,000 That's not going to be easy. 608 00:34:50,000 --> 00:34:51,000 Good. 609 00:34:54,000 --> 00:34:56,000 Let's go, Lipsinki. 610 00:34:56,000 --> 00:34:57,000 Let's go get him. 611 00:34:57,000 --> 00:35:01,000 I think Taryn can take care of what's going on around here. 612 00:35:02,000 --> 00:35:09,000 Two of you stand, and Vorunax, you grab the wand of Orcus. 613 00:35:09,000 --> 00:35:14,000 Wave it towards a wall, and we see this swirling portal appear. 614 00:35:14,000 --> 00:35:22,000 And beyond it, the faint light and outline of three figures 615 00:35:22,000 --> 00:35:29,000 as the two of you step through and into Shangalar's pyramid. 616 00:35:29,000 --> 00:35:38,000 It's a quick cut, and you're stepping back through this portal holding a vase. 617 00:35:38,000 --> 00:35:43,000 Well, very well done, Lipsinki, very well done. 618 00:35:43,000 --> 00:35:51,000 And I am impressed that you were able to resist your old compatriot's persuasion. 619 00:35:51,000 --> 00:35:59,000 Well, I'd say it was maybe less than five percent tempting. 620 00:35:59,000 --> 00:36:05,000 I mean, they don't know how powerful Orcus is. 621 00:36:05,000 --> 00:36:09,000 They haven't seen what he can do, and I have. 622 00:36:09,000 --> 00:36:14,000 So there's no doubt in my mind that Orcus is the winning team, 623 00:36:14,000 --> 00:36:20,000 and we're on the winning team, the correct team, the righteous team. 624 00:36:21,000 --> 00:36:25,000 That we are. 625 00:36:25,000 --> 00:36:28,000 What is it you hope? 626 00:36:28,000 --> 00:36:34,000 I mean, of course, we all know what Orcus will provide us when our job has been served, 627 00:36:34,000 --> 00:36:44,000 and we have played out our purpose, and we finally get to go to that peaceful area. 628 00:36:45,000 --> 00:36:52,000 Is there anything else that you see yourself doing for Orcus? 629 00:36:52,000 --> 00:36:56,000 I would like to see him totally successful. 630 00:36:56,000 --> 00:37:02,000 I know that there's still some folks working against him. 631 00:37:02,000 --> 00:37:05,000 So I'd like to put a stop to that. 632 00:37:05,000 --> 00:37:09,000 But I would also, and I don't want to rush Orcus. 633 00:37:09,000 --> 00:37:12,000 He can decide in his own time, and he knows what's right. 634 00:37:12,000 --> 00:37:17,000 But I would like to get that final reward. 635 00:37:17,000 --> 00:37:21,000 I am a little bit tired. 636 00:37:21,000 --> 00:37:27,000 And no pain, and no shame, and no embarrassment. 637 00:37:27,000 --> 00:37:35,000 Like, when you think you see somebody you know, and then you wave, and then you don't know them, and then, you know. 638 00:37:35,000 --> 00:37:36,000 Like, it's awkward. 639 00:37:36,000 --> 00:37:37,000 It's so awkward. 640 00:37:37,000 --> 00:37:47,000 And I'd like to not feel that again, and not feel even the remembrance of that kind of thing in the middle of the night when I wake up. 641 00:37:47,000 --> 00:37:49,000 So I'm ready. 642 00:37:49,000 --> 00:37:54,000 When Orcus says that I'm ready, I'm ready for my final reward of peace. 643 00:37:54,000 --> 00:37:57,000 Where would you spend your time in this peace? 644 00:37:57,000 --> 00:38:03,000 I know where I would desire to end up on this plane. 645 00:38:03,000 --> 00:38:11,000 Do you have a home or people you would want to spend eternity with? 646 00:38:11,000 --> 00:38:17,000 Well, you know, not really. 647 00:38:17,000 --> 00:38:25,000 I think that's one of the things I look forward to in the peace, is just not having any of those thoughts anymore. 648 00:38:25,000 --> 00:38:27,000 I could be anywhere, right? 649 00:38:27,000 --> 00:38:32,000 Because I'll be happy and content, serving Orcus wherever I end up. 650 00:38:32,000 --> 00:38:34,000 How about you? 651 00:38:34,000 --> 00:38:36,000 You know what, wait. 652 00:38:36,000 --> 00:38:38,000 Not in Blackpool. 653 00:38:38,000 --> 00:38:40,000 No. 654 00:38:40,000 --> 00:38:44,000 I don't want to go there, because we sort of started off on the wrong foot. 655 00:38:44,000 --> 00:38:47,000 It's kind of bad memories there, you know. 656 00:38:47,000 --> 00:38:48,000 Right. 657 00:38:48,000 --> 00:38:50,000 So, but other than that, anywhere. 658 00:38:50,000 --> 00:38:52,000 How about you? 659 00:38:52,000 --> 00:38:56,000 Well, it's funny you bring up Blackpool. 660 00:38:57,000 --> 00:39:03,000 I would hope I'd get to spend out the rest of my existence there with those people. 661 00:39:03,000 --> 00:39:09,000 It was the one place that I found that I kept coming back to. 662 00:39:09,000 --> 00:39:15,000 Time and time again, like I said, I traveled around so much. 663 00:39:15,000 --> 00:39:22,000 But the people there, the town itself, I became infatuated with it. 664 00:39:22,000 --> 00:39:24,000 And if you don't want to end up there, that's fine. 665 00:39:24,000 --> 00:39:27,000 I was going to say we've spent some time together, traveling around, 666 00:39:27,000 --> 00:39:32,000 and you know, I've become quite fond of your company, actually. 667 00:39:32,000 --> 00:39:39,000 I've enjoyed working with you and the success that we've acquired for Orcus. 668 00:39:39,000 --> 00:39:43,000 But if that's not where you find yourself, then that's not where you find yourself. 669 00:39:43,000 --> 00:39:46,000 And I mean, we may realize it or we may not. 670 00:39:46,000 --> 00:39:48,000 Who's to say? 671 00:39:48,000 --> 00:39:57,000 But for me, those people were my life. 672 00:39:57,000 --> 00:40:01,000 And I want to return to them. 673 00:40:01,000 --> 00:40:07,000 I attempted to bring them peace at one point. 674 00:40:07,000 --> 00:40:14,000 And in my time away, they met pain and suffering. 675 00:40:14,000 --> 00:40:16,000 I tried to bring them back from that pain and suffering. 676 00:40:16,000 --> 00:40:26,000 And well, let's just say those gods interfering with the wishes of mortals. 677 00:40:26,000 --> 00:40:28,000 What foot do they have? 678 00:40:28,000 --> 00:40:36,000 What foothold should they have in our world to interfere with our wishes and desires? 679 00:40:36,000 --> 00:40:37,000 None. 680 00:40:37,000 --> 00:40:38,000 None. 681 00:40:38,000 --> 00:40:43,000 But yet, they meddle. 682 00:40:43,000 --> 00:40:50,000 And the people of Blackpool ended up the way they are, not because of Orcus, but because of them. 683 00:40:50,000 --> 00:40:55,000 But Orcus showed me the light of their way and what was done, 684 00:40:55,000 --> 00:41:03,000 and how that existence is peace, it's serene. 685 00:41:03,000 --> 00:41:13,000 So I took pleasure in knowing that they would be watched over by a god who genuinely cared. 686 00:41:13,000 --> 00:41:19,000 And I took pleasure in committing myself to Orcus. 687 00:41:19,000 --> 00:41:22,000 Gods be damned, save one. 688 00:41:22,000 --> 00:41:27,000 Gods be damned, save one. 689 00:41:27,000 --> 00:41:33,000 As I finish saying that, I take the vase and I put it on the credenza, 690 00:41:33,000 --> 00:41:39,000 and I say, well, Shangalar shall have no final resting place. 691 00:41:39,000 --> 00:41:44,000 His existence will merely fade. 692 00:41:44,000 --> 00:41:51,000 And I take out the wand of Orcus and smash the vase. 693 00:41:51,000 --> 00:41:56,000 The ashes go up in a plume and begin to fall to the ground. 694 00:41:56,000 --> 00:42:08,000 As we fade ahead, you hold into your hands a report that there are survivors in Icewind Dale. 695 00:42:08,000 --> 00:42:15,000 Forces have been sent, but they've been met with an undead barrier. 696 00:42:15,000 --> 00:42:23,000 The two of you arrive at this barrier, which is just beyond the spine of the world. 697 00:42:23,000 --> 00:42:29,000 You see your forces piled up against it, and spirits and vrocks beating against it, 698 00:42:29,000 --> 00:42:35,000 and they're pulling apart, and those that are able to just push through are sent up in flames, 699 00:42:35,000 --> 00:42:43,000 and arrows are met from the other side with what little forces these people have. 700 00:42:43,000 --> 00:42:53,000 Beyond you've heard, there are wizards and even warriors that have been sent to find the gods. 701 00:42:53,000 --> 00:42:57,000 It's a little cold up here, isn't it? 702 00:42:57,000 --> 00:43:06,000 It is, and it's been, my god, years since we've seen this sort of resistance. 703 00:43:06,000 --> 00:43:09,000 It's a bit thrilling, isn't it? 704 00:43:09,000 --> 00:43:14,000 Despite it being as cold as it is, it does get my blood heated. 705 00:43:14,000 --> 00:43:25,000 Let's prepare ourselves for perhaps maybe the last bastion that these resistance folk have. 706 00:43:25,000 --> 00:43:36,000 And again, maybe overcast with this snowstorm, but the light of Orcus will pierce through those clouds. 707 00:43:37,000 --> 00:43:42,000 Dumbgeons and Dragons, Season 2, Episode 88. 708 00:43:42,000 --> 00:43:50,000 Starring Carla Maxted as Lipsinki Pipdigons, Kyle Claset as Vorunax, and Russ More as your Dungeon Master. 709 00:43:50,000 --> 00:43:54,000 Editing, production, and sound design by Russ More. 710 00:43:54,000 --> 00:44:01,000 This episode featured music from Epidemic Sound, and sound effects from Epidemic Sound, Boom Library, and Sound Ideas. 711 00:44:02,000 --> 00:44:04,000 A huge thank you to our supporting producers. 712 00:44:04,000 --> 00:44:14,000 Gabriel Lynch, Jessica Babyok, Stevie, Cat Waterflame, Jacob Madden, Christian Brown, Devin Michaels, Aaron Stevens, Eric Houlahan, and Ray Sirbeck. 713 00:44:14,000 --> 00:44:26,000 To support Dumbgeons and Dragons and our many other productions and get access to an exclusive podcast, bonus episodes, and much more, please join our Patreon at Patreon.com slash dumbdragoncast. 714 00:44:26,000 --> 00:44:33,000 You can also follow us at facebook.com slash dumbdragoncast, and on Instagram and Twitter at dumbdragoncast. 715 00:44:33,000 --> 00:44:37,000 Thank you for listening. Have a great week. We'll talk again soon. 716 00:44:42,000 --> 00:44:44,000 We cut to the... 717 00:44:46,000 --> 00:44:48,000 What's it called? 718 00:44:48,000 --> 00:44:52,000 Big thing sticks off the top of a tower to overlook. 719 00:44:52,000 --> 00:44:55,000 Balcony. That's the word? Thanks. 720 00:44:56,000 --> 00:45:01,000 I thought you were going for something much more technical, like turret? No? 721 00:45:01,000 --> 00:45:03,000 Balcony. Yep. 722 00:45:04,000 --> 00:45:08,000 It's fun to be evil. Right? It is a little fun to be evil. I love it. 723 00:45:08,000 --> 00:45:11,000 I hope it's okay that I'm just willy-nilly killing a lord. 724 00:45:11,000 --> 00:45:22,000 No, that's totally cool. We said that he was converted, which basically meant executed, but we didn't say how he was executed. This is good. 725 00:45:22,000 --> 00:45:30,000 As the whales rise up over the city, Vorunax and Lipstinky... Lipstinky. 726 00:45:33,000 --> 00:45:39,000 What have I said about bathing, Lipstinky? We still need to do it. We're not there yet. No. 727 00:45:40,000 --> 00:45:44,000 It's deep. It's heavy. You've got to expect the cries on, man. Jesus. 728 00:45:46,000 --> 00:45:50,000 Yeah. That's right. Vorunax is very compLex. 729 00:45:53,000 --> 00:45:56,000 Light of Orcus is going to light this place up. 730 00:45:57,000 --> 00:46:06,000 His light is like a snowpiercer. We'll have to train ourselves further to get... so stupid, I'm sorry. 731 00:46:07,000 --> 00:46:08,000 I loved it.